Loving Mrs. Hwang

Lo Siento

I went home feeling dejected because of what happened. Why would I feel this way? Tif- I mean Mrs. Hwang and I just met. I shouldn't feel and care this much for her.

Yes I like her but I couldn't explain what's this feeling for. I feel like I'm already attached to her and I don't like it. It feels like she can control me and my emotions more than I can control it. That's a bad thing. Very bad thing.

I convinced myself not to cry about this thing, I shouldn't let my emotions eat and manipulate me.

And it was happening again as I remember a blast from the past. I should be strong to fight this, I'm so done being hurt. I already fell in love with someone, I really wanted to give my love to her but she just threw it away. She didn't give me a chance and rejected me.

Am I asking for the moon? I just want them to love me back. No s**t. I can't make them love me, we can't force people to love us.

That's why I don't do relationship, I'm afraid of this love. I don't trust love, I don't trust my feelings because it always betray me. It just leads me to misery and being broken.

I was in my room when Hyoyeon knocked at my door, I let her in. She was wearing her formal attire, I guess she has a business trip. Again. No worries, I can handle myself and I'm used to be alone. That's not bitter okay, I don't blame anyone for that. My family is taking care of me, it's just me who feel distant.

I know... what's wrong with me right?

"I'll be in a business trip for 2 weeks," Hyoyeon informed me.

I nodded "Okay sis, have a safe trip and take care."

Hyoyeon sat on the edge of my bed as she held my knee "I will miss you," she sincerely said as she stared at me in the eyes.

I smiled "I will miss you too, you old brat," I playfully replied.

Her forehead creased "I'm not old, you midget!"

"Midget? I'm not midget!" I argued.

"Yes you are."

"No, am not!"

"You're shorter than me," she reminded me.

"But that doesn't mean I'm a midget," I pouted.

"Oh you said it yourself, you are a midget," she grinned.

I rolled my eyes "Oldie."

"Midget."

Then we laughed.

"Take care of yourself baby sis, don't worry I already sent money to your account. Oh, anyway... I also called a friend who will take of you," she sighed in relief.

A friend? Oh maybe our neighbor.

I nodded "Thank you sis, you're the best."

"I love you," she hugged me tightly.

I hugged her back "I love you too."

"Okay," Hyoyeon faced me. "I have to go now," she stood up. "I prepared dinner, you should eat now."

"Alright."

Hyoyeon is the best sister in the world. I'm lucky to have her. She takes care of me and she gives all the love that she can give to me. That's why I'm trying my best to be a good sister for her.

The next day I felt awkward when I'm in the class with Mrs. Hwang, she kept glancing at me but I couldn't read her mind. I just acted like I didn't care but deep inside, I'm hurt and I wanted to cry.

It feels weird because I can't believe my own feelings. It annoys me but I can't do anything about it.

I wasn't in the mood, I didn't listen to the lesson and heck, great! We had a short quiz, I just passed my blank paper. All clean, I couldn't care less.

I also barely talked with Yoona and I know she could sense something was wrong with me.

Lunch time, I bought my meal in the canteen then headed back to Mrs. Hwang's room. She instructed me to check the papers as she gave all the answers, I just obeyed but I'm giving her a cold shoulder. What did you expect me to do?

But before I do that, we ate lunch first. I was sitting next to her as we ate in silence. I could feel that, she was glancing at me but I just focused myself on eating.

"Taeyeon?" Mrs. Hwang called me.

I turned my head and looked at her uninterested "Yes Mrs. Hwang?"

"Ah... Are you... Are you alright?" She asked concerned.

I averted my eyes back to my lunch and nodded "Yes, Mrs. Hwang," I shortly replied. I just repeated what I said.

"Do I deserve that silent treatment?" She sadly asked.

I remained stiffed.

"Taeyeon," Mrs. Hwang softly said. Surely, she gave me chills. "I'm sorry about what I said yesterday, I was shocked with your action and I didn't mean that," she genuinely stated as she held my arm.

I stared at her hand on my arm and I held it, I gently slipped it away from me.

"Don't worry Mrs. Hwang, it's fine. I should know my place here, I'm just your student. I should respect you in all aspect. I'm sorry for being stupid doing that," I coldly assured her.

"I'm not mad Taeyeon, I just can't believe it happened. You know, I have my fiance and I love him. It's just confusing me why you acted like that? Am I giving you wrong signal?" She asked bewildered.

Wrong signal? I'm receiving wrong signal from her? f**k. I thought I'm special because she wanted me to be her friend. I thought she liked me because she was curious about my preferences and she defended my s****l orientation.

She's straight that only supports people like me. That's it.

It's not her fault, it's my fault because I assumed things. I only hurt myself for giving myself false hope. s**t happens. I hate it.

"No Mrs. Hwang, it's my fault," and I'm accountable for that.

"But I swear, I really want to be your friend. I hope there's no awkward feelings between us since we just met yesterday. Please?" She was giving me those cute puppy eyes.

I chuckled. She was right. Maybe I should just accept it. "Okay, Mrs. Hwang."

"Great!" She happily cheered. "Yay! So friends?"

I nodded then smiled.

Mrs. Hwang is really kind, other teacher would sue me if I did that to them. Definitely.

"Yes, Mrs. Hwang."

Mrs. Hwang frowned "Umm... it feels weird when you call me like that," she shyly said.

"Oh..."

"I-I know you also feel weird calling me that right?"

I hummed "Then should I call you Professor T?"

She gave me a confused look.

"Professor T?"

"Y'know, you are like Professor X from Marvel Comics. You can read my mind but instead of X, I put T which stands for your name Tiffany," huh! I have a brilliant mind!

Mrs. Hwang giggled then she started to laugh "You're so cute Taeyeon."

I blushed. I admit, I still have this crush on her.

Mrs. Hwang nodded "Okay, call me Professor T."

I mentally celebrated.

"I want to be special so I'm the only one who can call you that," I winked. Don't blame me, I can't control it.

"Possessive much?"

I don't know anymore if I'm still receiving wrong signal, I should just ignore it.

"Anyway, next time don't buy lunch in the canteen. I will just make us lunch, it's all I can do since you accepted being my assistant," she was staring straight back at me.

"Thank you Professor T," I looked away. She's intimidating, I feel nervous whenever she looks at me.

Mrs. Hwang held a piece of paper and showed it to me, geez. It was my quiz!

"You can still use this for our next quiz," she sarcastically remarked.

I felt ashamed.

"I will let this pass Kim Taeyeon, just this one because you're special, you're a friend but please help yourself okay?" She patted my back as she advised.

I nodded "I will, thanks."

"Good, I'm happy that we're okay now. Let's finish our lunch then start checking papers," she gave me eye smile and I could sense her good vibes.

Gosh, this woman is really something.

After lunch break, I headed to my next classes. I was in the good mood for everything. At least, we're friends. I don't know, I'm just happy that we're fine now.

But there's still something that bothers me with the way she look and talk to me, it's different. Is she stopping herself or something? I need to know and I should make a plan to make her admit it. I could feel that she likes me too.

My stubborn mind was kept pushing me and making me believe it. I know it sounds bullshit but there's nothing wrong if I try to make her jealous.

Well... in the first place, this is wrong. She's my professor and she's engaged. I don't know but I can't control myself.

Last period for today with Mrs. Hwang, she was discussing things but I couldn't help it, I was just staring at her and not listening to what she was saying. I was admiring her and her beauty. I was zoning out then an idea crossed my mind.

Seolhyun. What if I use Seolhyun to make her jealous? It sounds evil to use someone but I want to try. I want to see her reaction, I want to see that jealous and possessive Mrs. Hwang.

So I quickly took a piece of paper in my bag then write "Do you really like me?" I folded it then passed it to Seolhyun. She accepted it then read.

I saw her eyes widened then she scribbled, folded it and discreetly passed it to me.

I read it "What are you talking about?" My raised my eyebrows, I didn't expect her response. Am I being blunt to ask that?

I wrote down "Baekhyun told me about it," then passed it to her again. I saw her face reddened and she glanced at me bashfully.

She didn't write back so I tore another piece of paper from my notebook then wrote "If you really like me, kiss me right after the class." Then once again, I gave it to her. She bit her lower lip and she froze. Maybe it caught her off guard. Just a kiss on cheek won't hurt that much right?

The tardy bell rang then my classmates prepared themselves to leave, so did I.

Students left immediately as if they wanted to get away from here. Seolhyun stood up then rushed out of the room leaving me puzzled.

Baekhyun lied to me?

I just thought Seolhyun likes me. I guess I need to change plan.

I looked at Mrs. Hwang and caught her staring at me, she awkwardly smiled.

I couldn't help but to smirk as our eyes locked.

Then Seolhyun walked back into the room and sprinted to me, she held my cheeks carefully then crashed her lips to mine without a warning.

I swear Mrs. Hwang saw it clearly! Fudge! I never thought this coming, I mean I was just expecting a kiss on cheek!

Seolhyun's lips were soft and she smelled really nice by the way.

The kiss ended quickly as Seolhyun backed away to face me "Yes I like you Taeyeon. Will you date me?" Her eyes were filled of hopes as she waited for my answer.

What the fudge?

Demmmn girl.

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