HE WAS A SHE

CHAPTER 5: AT THE LION’S DEN

The cat pretended to be a fierce tiger in the lion’s den by putting on a tiger’s skin. Not that he wanted to pretend in the first place, but he had no choice. To survive, he must put on a mask and pretend to be someone else. He lived that life for too long until one day he couldn’t take off the mask he was using. He got used to it and so was his body. And along the way, he lost his real identity. He doesn’t know which path to take in retrieving his lost identity. All the paths in front of him were blurry and dark. He doesn’t know what to do. But one day, he just decided he had to at least try to find that way back home. No matter how long and tiring it is, he must at least give it a shot. Endless trying made him so weak and weary. But then he didn’t give up and, just like magic, he finally found his way back home—a place where he just had to himself and not somebody else. That’s when he realized that no matter how much struggle life may throw at you, it’s no excuse for you to give back that same pain and sadness to others. It might sound unfair and unjustifiable not to get back on what they did, but if, along the way, your happiness and peace are at stake, it will never be worth it. That’s my sister’s nighttime story every time I tell her about having a bad day at school. I was too young back then to realize the real essence of her words. Not until I have to be that cat in her story that needs to put on a fake identity, not for selfish desires but for my family’s sake—for mom’s condition. I know how hard it is to live with a false identity, but if that’s the only way for me to have that inner peace, I’m willing to take the risk, no matter how scary it is in the lion’s den—even risking my own life.

***

Morning came. The sun rises as early as 6 am as it reflects on the window. I woke up from its reflection on the glass. I grunted in pain at my back after seeing how I managed to fall asleep sitting on the floor and leaning my face on the center table. I slowly stood up and stretched my frigid joints. I smiled and thanked God for another day. I moved towards the window and slid the curtains to the side to see how the beautiful morning was being welcomed by other people. But my smile suddenly changes into an expression of where I am and what this place is. My eyes rolled into surprise seeing how a panorama of people biking, jogging, and doing their morning routine with a happy smile on their faces filled the busy streets with different cars and people walking hastily without even smiling a bit. All were on their frowning faces as they were busy looking at their flickering screens.

“Am I dreaming?” I asked myself. “Am I still half-asleep?” I slapped my face. “Ouch!” I grumbled in pain. “I’m not dreaming nor am I half-asleep,” I told myself after realizing how my face ached a bit. I tried to scan my memory but I feel like I’m having short-term memory loss. I looked to my left.

“Oh!” I uttered after seeing a well-furnished and spacious kitchen and dining area. “As far as I could remember, this is not my kitchen nor Bobby’s,” I commented.

I turned my back only to jump out of my position. My eyes widen and my mouth opens loosely for a bit. I rolled my eyes along my body and looked as if my undies were still present. And after seeing their fine, I immediately erased the idea of something that happened last night. I breathe in and out trying to calm myself.

“Why am I here, in the first place?” I asked. And I remember the text message my boss sent to me and how I just ran off there looking so pathetic. And how do I even end up spending the night at his place?

“Are you crazy? Ah!” I feel disgusted with myself.

“Mmm…” he was murmuring.

Right then, I immediately stopped myself from shouting and sneakily moved into the bathroom. I looked at myself in the mirror and after realizing that my bare face would create suspicion about my identity, I fixed myself quickly. I searched for a styling gel for his essentials. I washed my hair lightly first and styled my hair just like how people see me at the company. I put on my hood for extra caution. I walked out of the bathroom as slowly and quietly as possible. I was about to leave when my stomach grumbled with hunger.

“Suddenly?” I told myself.

I continued my steps out when my stomach got louder and I was squinting with pain at the door. That’s when I decided I must eat something. I know it might sound rude to eat at somebody else’s house, so I have to cook a proper meal for the owner of the house as a sign of gratitude and respect as well, because he was the one who caused me a lot of trouble.

I scanned his fridge and after seeing how bountiful it was, my head hurt a bit. I don’t know what to cook. But due to time constraints, I decided to cook a simple breakfast for him. A bowl of colorful fried rice mixed with small cuts of veggies and beans. I fried two sunny-side-up eggs, bacon, and beef tapa. I blended a veggie juice for his hangover. After setting up the table, I sneaked out of his place.

I drove the car way back home since I only had an hour before work, since, as the COO’s executive assistant, I needed to be there as early as possible, which meant I had to be at the office thirty minutes before he arrived. Luckily, the 10-minute drive lasted for 5 minutes only. I rushed upstairs and immediately into my house.

“Good morning!” Bobby greeted me out of surprise seeing me walking and getting in on the house. “Hey!” he knocked on the door.

“Did you go for an early jog in the park?”

“Jog?” I asked myself. “Ah!” I remembered I had slept at somebody else’s home and I knew he would throw a pit if he knew who was the place I spent the night with. So, I jive in his assumptions. “Yes!” I responded.

“Really? You should have called me so I can join you. I wanted to have a healthier body as well.” He sounded like someone sulking.

“Sure. I will invite you next time.” I added while walking out of my house swiftly.

“Hey! Will you not have breakfast?” He asked.

I made a fake smile. “I will just eat at the office. I got a call from my boss and he wants me as early as possible.”

“But, even if he’s your boss, you still need to eat,” he insisted.

“I know,” I replied. “But, I don’t think it’s the right time to be on his bad side. You know what I mean, right?”

“Last night, you were cursing at him and now you’re acting like a timid cat who would do everything he said.” He added.

“Let’s just talk when I come back, okay? I really have to go. Bye!” I quickly added.

Luckily, I get out easily from his endless interrogations. “I’m sorry,” I uttered. “I know you’re just worried about me. But, I got this.”

I drove the car as swiftly as possible and, thanks to my superb driving skill, I reached the company on time. I rushed to his office and prepared all his morning schedules. After making sure everything was perfectly prepared, I sat on the couch for a bit while waiting for him.

I tried to make a call to Bobby. “Bob? Are you there?”

“Yes! Why?” He asked.

“Don’t worry about me,” I uttered. “Plus, I have already eaten my breakfast at the office. If you’re worried that I’m skipping my meals because of this, rest your worries because I’m not. Okay?”

“Yes,” he nodded.

“Are we good now?” I asked.

“Of course,” he replied. “Let’s catch up later, okay? Your boss is coming. He’s already in the elevator.”

“Yes! Bye!” I added.

And there he is, walking firmly and confidently as he used to be. Faking an expression on his face. Back to his usual self. Back to his arrogant personality. I couldn’t stop myself wondering how tiring it must have been for him. He was like someone with a DID or dissociative identity disorder or someone with multiple personalities. Well, I was no different from him. I’m also portraying a different identity in front of him and in front of people I made friends with within the company. It was very hard for me, especially since he is leading a huge company and a lot of people depend on his management and wise decision-making.

“Mr. Perez!” He shouted. “Mr. Perez!” He yelled again, but with time, he recoiled with disgust as his eyes got narrowed.

“Yes! I’m sorry.” I immediately apologized.

“Cancel all my appointments for this morning.” He ordered.

“Why?” I curiously asked.

“Do I have to make myself repeat?” His nose was wrinkled in disgust.

“No! Of course not,” I responded.

“And one more thing, you don’t need to drive me off this morning either,” he added. “Just stay here and finish all the documents for the afternoon meeting. I won’t allow any mistakes, Mr. Perez. Do you understand?”

“Yes!” I responded. “If you don’t mind, I would like to know where you are going,” I asked. “I mean the investors and some clients might ask and I don’t want to mess up this time.”

“Personal matters. Just tell them it’s highly confidential.” He explained no further as he found his way out.

“How rude!” I told myself. “He didn’t change a bit. He’s hopeless.” I added while moving out of the room, took a seat on my desk and finished all the documents needed for the meeting this afternoon. The four-hour work was thankfully done in two hours and I needed to search for evidence this time while my boss was gone. I sneaked into his office smoothly while bringing some documents in my hands. I didn’t lock the door so no one would cause any suspicion while I scanned his things. I began the search for his drawer. I carefully scan every detail I can use against them. But despite scanning over all the documents on the cabinet, I found nothing. I feel disgusted.

“Of course, they will not easily leave traces of something that could bring them down. The filthier it is, the more it needs to be hidden. And that place is something you less expected. And that would be… a hidden safe.” I uttered while scanning over the entire vicinity of the office. “Where could it be?” I asked myself. “It should be somewhere since this is the office of the former COO, Michael Cruz. The man who was with my sister that night died. The man suddenly changed his testimony and eventually got into a coma after getting into a traffic accident just before the case would be closed. I know it’s wrong to easily jump to a conclusion and just trust your gut feeling on matters like this. But, just what my dad’s impression on his investigation, he found everything so odd. All the puzzle pieces don’t fit perfectly on the reason why my elder sister would commit suicide in the first place. I know her more than anyone else. Despite the sudden change I have seen in her since she worked on MC Group, I know she wouldn’t do something like taking her life so easily.

Just like how it is in the movies, hidden safes are usually located behind the wall or a painting. “Right! Painting!” I said. “But most of the painting in this room was hung on areas impossible for construction of a hidden safe,” I added. “But… there is one… in the personal space.” I quickly moved towards the room and checked whether my instincts were right or not. But, I feel disappointed. There was none. “Not on the paintings. Where could it be then?” My curiosity rose.

“The walls?” I asked myself. “No way! But, it could be.” I grinned, looking hopeful this time.

I quickly moved towards every corner of the room and touched slowly everything that would open up something. But still, there were none. I feel so helpless. Thankfully, Bobby called over.

“Eli! Try the bookshelf on your right.” He uttered. “Touch every single book placed on the bookshelf. There must be something there. Hurry! Someone is coming. She’s the assistant of the CEO and she’s 20 minutes away from where you are. So, hurry. Make it quick.”

“Yes,” I replied. I touched every book level by level but still found nothing until, when I reached the last book at the top corner of the bookshelf, something bugged out. A wall at my side suddenly cracked open as if there was a secret door towards a hidden room.

“Turn it back, Eli,” Bobby shouted as soon as Ms. Garcia is about to open the door of the office.

I got surprised and my body was chilling so nervously. Luckily, before she entered the room, I was able to close the secret door and stood up near the COO’s table while pretending to be fixing something.

“Relax! Calm down!’” Bobby whispered in my ear. “Just pull it off like always. Fighting!”

His last words were imprinted on my mind and somehow gave me the strength to smile and control my tense body. I pulled out the best smile I could and greeted her cheerfully. “That’s it, Eli,” I told myself. “You shouldn’t mess up this time. Not now that you’re a step closer to your goal.”

“Why are you here? Alone?” She asked while raising her eyebrows at me. Her usual expression since I came to this company. I don’t know what I did to her, so that she would treat me like an arch-rival or something.

“Did she sense that I’m a woman?” I asked myself. “No way. It can’t be. If so, she must have a sixth sense in her forehead.”

“Your boss is out for an early meeting. So, why would his secretary just be lounging here all alone?” She added.

“Mr. Cruz ordered me to stay in his office to finish all the necessary details for the moving meeting this afternoon. And here I am working my butt off to finish on time. I am working even without someone looking at me, unlike some who are just lounging around without their respective boss.” I explained, although I don’t need to, since she’s not my superior in the first place. But just to clear up any suspicion from her, I feed up her interrogations. 

“Lounging around? Who are you talking about? Me?” She furiously added.

“I’m not mentioning any names,” I added.

“Huh!” She fumes with anger. “Are you looking down on me just because you’re young and impressive at your work?”

“No, of course not.” I pleaded not guilty.

“Hey!” She was about to do something for me when my phone rang.

“Sorry! But I need to take this call. My boss is calling. So, if you’ll excuse me then,” I uttered.

But instead of making myself an excuse, she walked out of the room first. I laughed a bit after putting her in her right place. I know I made a promise myself not to be too nosy about other people, especially at the company, but after seeing with my two eyes how she badly behaved towards other employees—acting bossy around people who are less in the hierarchy than her, it disgusts me. And I just felt like I needed to remind her that we are all equal in this company, since we are all under one management. And she has no right to belittle anyone, regardless of their position. I know doing that would take me to her bad side and might cause me at a disadvantage in the future. But I can’t stand her mockery more, especially for the weak.

“What took you so long to answer my call?” He groaned.

“I’m sorry, Sir. Ms. Garcia dropped by at the office suddenly, so…”

But even before I could finish my explanation, he immediately butts in. “Stop it. I don’t want to hear any excuses. Come to Casa Mira. I’ll email you the location. Be there before lunchtime. Okay?” He ordered.

“Yes,” I responded.

***

In the car.

“Congrats! Earlier, you were smooth like butter…” Bob sang enthusiastically.

“Ha! Ha! Ha!” I sounded a bit pissed off about his singing out of tune and his mischievous laugh. “And, thanks to that, I have added another one to my list.”

“List?” He curiously asked. “What list?”

“ A list of people I need to be cautious of,” I explained.

“It’s okay. I know you can handle her.” He uttered. “She’s not a tough one, Eli. For sure, you will find something to get her to fall into your act. By the way, speaking of the secret door. I scan the room behind it after you stuck the hidden camera on the wall. And by the looks of it, there’s nothing special about that room. As in, nothing. It is just a blank space. The camera didn’t detect any hidden vault or anything. Well, maybe in the past it contained something that could be valuable but they’ve already moved it or discarded it for good.”

“So, it was purely useless after all.” I sighed deeply.

“It’s okay, Eli. This is just the beginning. We’re just getting started, you know. As I said, the more it is hidden the filthier the smell is, the more fun it is for us, right?” He added, trying to comfort me.

“Thank you,” I uttered.

“No worries. Just thank me big time when we’re done with our mission, okay?” He said. “Bye! Your lovey-dovey boss is waiting for you!” he added.

“What? No, of course not.” I quickly uttered. “Bye!”

***

At the restaurant.

Because of the heavy traffic, I arrived 10 minutes late. I feel a bit disgusted with myself. I knew how much COO Cruz hated being late. “For sure, he would throw a tantrum,” I told myself. “Gosh! Darn it. How could you succeed in messing up your plan like this, Eli? First, with Ms. G and now… Ah!” I screamed.

I slowly walked inside the restaurant as I searched for my boss. He didn’t tell me exactly where he would be seated. He just emailed the name of the restaurant and the address. His usual personality. Despite being newly hired at the company, I already knew what kind of personality he had. When he looked at you with his slowly-narrowed eyes and with vertical wrinkles around his eyebrows, he was already disgusted, pissed off, and filled with anger. He’s a volcano waiting to erupt anytime. When he would sigh deeply and look at you from head to toe as if he’s undressing you or stuff, beware he’s not instead, he’s killing you with his damn fiery eyes. So, you better hurry and apologize even for the things you didn’t do in the first place. And when he orders you to do something and he’s only giving one to two lines of instructions, that means it’s up to you and your superb common sense on how to fulfill your task without asking him any further details. “Yes! That’s him. What a jerk! How could he get a yes from the woman he loved with that kind of attitude? He must have been using some black magic or stuff.”

“COO Cruz, reservation, please?” I asked the front desk. The woman guided me into a secluded part of the restaurant. Looking at how a two-meter walk from the entrance to the reservation, being a COO is really on a different level. You get the best seat, the best room, and the best service--people will bow down to you. One day, I dreamed of wanting that kind of life—where you could buy anything you want. I was bewitched by the perks of living a comfortable life. I even asked myself about all the maybe’s if I have a lot of money. Maybe my sister wouldn’t work at MC Group in the first place. Maybe she wouldn’t work her butt off when things get tough on her shoulders. Maybe she wouldn’t easily leave us for good. Then maybe dad wouldn’t stress himself on finding justice for my late sister. Maybe he wouldn’t fight hard to seek justice but let those who did something bad easily pay for their crime. Then maybe he wouldn’t die as well. Maybe I could still smell the aroma of his early morning coffee routine while reading a headline in his favorite newspaper while blocking the rays of the sun, since his well-loved spot is always near the windows. Then, maybe mom wouldn’t go insane and cry alone every night feeling scared because she couldn’t understand nor remember what was going on. Maybe, mom wouldn’t cave in from her world just to erase all the painful memories in her mind. Then, maybe I could still see her sweet smile while cooking meals for us. Maybe I could still feel her warmth while wrapping me in her arms, especially when I couldn’t sleep at night easily.

But just as the door opened towards the VIP room, an unexpected commotion welcomed my eyes.

“Bang!” A loud noise was heard. Not a simple thud on the door but a slap on the face that made someone fall out of balance and hit a sturdy table. Not that I heard it with my ears, but even witness with my very own eyes. Not that my boss just slapped someone. It’s the other way around. He’s the one who got slapped on the face. Not from somebody else but his father. I didn’t get to see his father’s face directly, since I rarely saw him at the company. But, hearing my boss call dad and staring at his side view aura, I already assumed he was his father and the CEO of the company. He has this distinct aura that would make anyone around him in the most awkward position. You’ll be left speechless and just lower your head down once he opens his mouth.

And that’s the second time I have felt sorry for him—my boss. The first was when I saw him sleeping while calling a woman’s name. And when I saw his prenup video, suddenly, sadness envelopes my heart and I feel pity for him. I may not know the backstory behind that video, but I knew that girl meant a lot to him and that woman was the one that got away. Seeing him smile while his eyes were filled with happiness and joy and looking at him right now, he was dumped by her unexpectedly. And until now, he’s not yet over with her. The second was this—a front view of a father and son's not-so-good bonding. It was different from what was printed on magazines and billboards. Far different from what was shown on TV and in the spotlight. What I saw today was not a picture of a happy family. But a family who pretends to be happy since they’re on top of the world has all the fame, power, and prestige. But inside, everything was nothing but a mess and tangled issues.

“I’m so disappointed in you.” The CEO grunted and just left easily without even feeling remorse for his son. Not as the CEO of the company, but as his father. Instead, he just walked away leaving hurtful words for his son. “Useless!” He added while slamming the door intensely.

“Was there a father like that?’ I asked myself. “How could a father say hurtful words to his son? I mean, isn’t it a dad who should be the first one who would protect his children from those who bully and hurt them? Isn’t it a father who should be the first one who would embrace his hurt son and give his fatherly comfort?” I added.

That kind of front-row experience has made me realize one thing. Having a lot of money doesn’t always guarantee happiness and joy. Now I know why I wasn’t born in that kind of place, because I was meant to be my dad’s daughter and raised in a happy home. Despite the pain our family had to go through, there were still happy memories worth reminiscing about.

What I saw wasn’t the kind of father I experienced with my dad. “It must have been so painful,” I told myself while looking at him. I moved towards him and tried to ask if he was okay. But, he just pushed him to the side and walked away with a heavy heart. Well, everyone would react the same thing. And for him, getting a slap on the face by your father in front of your subordinates is really on a different level. It’s very humiliating. And because of that, I get where he's getting from. “So, let’s just let him pass this day, Eli. No need to feel disgusted.” I said while breathing in and out, trying to calm myself.

I hurried my steps as I followed him behind. Looking at how he changes his momentum and pace now and then, he’s distressed by the commotion earlier.

“Ah!” I shouted after accidentally bumping into something. “Oops!” I added after seeing it was not something but someone. And not just someone stranger but him. Of all people, it was him—my boss. My eyes widened as I felt the rising tide of fear run from my head to toe. I felt like a breeze of cold air rushing into my bones. “I’m doomed!” I whispered.