Loving Professor Gill

Chapter 3

He never meant to say that but what’s done is done, he had seen the tears in her eyes and couldn’t help but feel bad for the pain he knew he had caused her. Last night he kept the look in her eyes as she walked away it was a haunting look, and this morning he had not seen her in class even her loud friend was not in class.

He felt like he was lost and he did not know why, Ryan was used to her sitting at the back of his class, he was used to looking at her when she wasn’t watching. The only girl, no woman, she was definitely a real woman, who could rile him up even with just her stare; Ryan did not know how to deal with this feelings. He had never been one to chase he was always the one being chased by women wherever he went. He had only been with a few women but only then the attraction had not been this strong. There was nothing he could do about it since she was his student and he was known to not mix work and pleasure. So many students proposition him but he never felt anything with them.

The first time he saw Anna was at the university grounds he thought she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen, most of the time he saw students as just hormonal teenagers but with her it was love at first sight. He was attracted to her, something which had never happened before with one of his students. He thought he could control the lust he felt for her but when she introduced herself in his class he could not help lashing out at her, since she made him feel things which were forbidden. Since then his anger towards her had been like a defense mechanism. It hurt every time he saw her with other male students, he felt like claiming her as his but he had to wait, and it won’t be long. He was planning to ask her out immediately after graduation.

He had to have her as his own, what he feels for wasn’t lust it was love ad he had just hurt her by saying the most horrible things to her, will she ever forgive him, even he couldn’t forgive himself he had to see her to make sure she was alright ad to try to apologize.

Ryan didn’t know how to woo a woman anymore, it had been too long, the last woman he had courted was his late fiancé who had died almost ten years ago and since then he hadn’t been in love with any woman till Anna came barreling in and knocking down his defenses and implanting herself in his heart. Rebecca, his late fiancé had died from a car accident when he was twenty four and she had been twenty five. They had met through their parents who were friends and it was love at first sight for Ryan who was too eager to date an older experienced woman.

They started dating a month later and it was on and off for a year when Ryan proposed, Rebecca said yes. Five months later Ryan received a phone call that Rebecca was in an accident, the reports showed that she had been driving drunk and was two months pregnant at the time. Ryan was devastated not only about Rebecca’s dead but also the pregnancy; they hadn’t slept together for almost four months.

Rebecca had been cheating on him with one of her guy friends, looking back he noticed the signs but he didn’t want to believe that his Rebecca could cheat on him. After their engagement they started having nasty fights, which ended in sometimes Rebecca leaving him with bruises, he was ashamed to admit to those around him that he was in an abusive relationship. First it started with Rebecca throwing abusive words at him then it escalated to even throwing sharp objects at him. He had a scar on his right shoulder where she had hit him with a broken mirror. He had it stitched up by a doctor friend of his; Ryan was raised by his mama to treat women with respect that is why he did not retaliate.

His trust in women was broken and his believe in a forever love faded only treated them with respect and told them the rules before getting into any s****l relationship with them. Ryan detached his heart from anything he did with them, s*x to him became a physical thing were both parties were aware that what they were getting into was not permanent and it ends any moment.

His most recent relationship at ended almost three and a half years ago after he saw Anna, he knew he wouldn’t be able to forget her that is why he had gut ties with his fling Brenda it wasn’t fair to be with her while he thought of another woman. Ryan had bedded two women since Rebecca and Brenda was the most understanding of the two, Brenda was a doctor and they had met during one of the seminars he had attended, she did not in his business and in turn he did not interview in hers. He respected her and at one point he had even thought of marrying her because he was advancing in age and he wanted to have kids. He had thought he could marry Brenda and have kids in a marriage based on mutual respect and understanding but he could never see himself falling in love with Brenda.

Those plans were dashed away the moment he saw Anna, he could not explain the intensity of his love for her, suddenly he wanted it all with Anna then, he wanted love, family and kids. He wanted it all with Anna and no other woman will do. Anna became his only reason to wake up every morning; she became his only reason to live. Anna was like a drug to him and he was addicted, Ryan lived for those few minutes they run in to each other only they ended in a shouting match between them.

He loved her fears nature to protect those she loved and stand up to him. Anna was the only one of his students who could fight him with passion in something she believed. Her eyes light up when she was happy and she talked too much when she was excited about something. All this he noticed after following her around like a love sick bubby. He was becoming like a stalker due to his love for her, Ryan could not go a day without seeing her beautiful face.

Ryan could not wait for the four months to be over for him to ask Anna out, that is if she ever forgave him which he saw as impossible going by the way he had spoken to her. He prayed that she would because he didn’t want to find out how it feels living the rest of his life without her. He had waited too long for this and he had screwed up right at the last minutes.

These two years without her had been a torture, having to watch being with the college students following around. There were two major ones, he had to take care of them and make sure they stayed far away from Anna. The first one on his list was the Jason kid in his class. He kept following Anna around like shadow.

Ryan did not miss the way Jason looked at Anna; the kid was crazy if he thought he could have what was his. Jason only came to class to drool over Anna many times he found him zoned out staring at Anna. Good thing she was unaware

The second person was Ian who kept blowing up Anna’s phone he had to find out who he was and stop what was going on between him and Anna. She claimed to be in a relationship with Ian but he had better sense than to believe what she said since he had been following her, and knew well that Anna never dated anyone in fact she had never had a boyfriend before. So he had to find out who Ian was and get rid of him.

Ryan woke up very early the next morning determined to find out what happened to Anna even if it means hunting down her nosy friend. Going to Anna’s place wasn’t an option since he had been there last night only to find out from her neighbor that she had not been home for the Last two days. He was worried about her, Anna never does anything out of the routine and always if she wasn’t in school she was at work or at her friend’s Alex.

For her not to be at home something had to have happen to her and he didn’t want to imagine the worst but he had to find Alex immediately she was the only one who would know were Anna was. Ryan handed over his duties to another professor for the day telling her that he had a family emergency; he was relieved when she did not ask further questions on the matter.

After finding out information about Alex from the college records he contacted her for them to meet up.

Alex didn’t know how to feel after being contacted by professor Gill, after being contacted by the hospital about Anna’s accident she had rushed over to the hospital only to be confronted by the news that Anna was in comma and that they didn’t know if she could ever wake up. And now Anna’s worst enemy was calling what next, the end of the world.

Alex had always suspected Dr. Gill was in love with Anna but based on the looks he gave Anna but Anna never noticed instead she thought that he hated her, but your know what they say there’s isn’t much difference between love and hate. Anna had been in love with the guy for almost two years, and she had been with her since day one when the guy had kept insulting and humiliating Anna and that is why Alex never liked professor Gill he broke her best friends hearth and she had to watch her cry day in day out from an impossible love to her professor.

Alex decided to meet up with Dr. Gill at a restaurant just near the hospital; she could have a civilized conversation with him without feeling like ripping off his head. The minute Alex got there he found professor Gill already seated.

“Am looking for Anna... do you know where she has been?” he said as soon as Alex sat down “have been to her place twice and was told she hasn’t been home in two day”,

Alex stared at him trying to determine if it was a good idea to tell him about Anna, and she decided to give it a try

“why are you looking for Anna, I thought you hated her,” Alex replied ” and even if I knew where she is what makes you think am going to tell you, so that you can hurt her again with your brute attitude,”

“look Alex I know I have been horrible to her, but I need to know that she is safe I have this feeling that something bad happened to her,”

Ryan said trying harder to convince Alex that he meant no harm to Anna

“and why do you want to know so much about Anna’s where about, I thought you didn’t care about her,” Alex said

“I just want to make sure she is OK and nothing happened to her,” he looked down “Alex, am in love with your friend and I admit I was a jerk to her and I just want to fix that OK”

Alex was surprised, she had suspected it but she never expected professor Gill to admit it.

“and when did you come to this realization last I checked you were acting like a brick,” Alex was in a roll she wanted to still make him squirm

Ryan knew very well what she was doing but he didn’t have time for her shenanigans he had to find Anna soon, even if it means having to sit here and listen to Anna’s crazy friend.

“am sorry about how I acted before, but it was the only way to avoid a scandal in college”

“well that was a stupid move on your side ,” Alex said “you dug a deeper hole than you imagined buddy, now you got one he’ll of a crazy woman to convince there, anyway enough about that let’s go,”

“Where is she Alex?” he was eager to find out

“Just shut up and follow me, you’re giving me and headache” Alex said without thinking

They got into Ryan’s car and Alex told him to drive to the hospital, Ryan hearing this was terrified.

“So when exactly where you planning to tell her how you feel?” Alex asked

“After graduation, I was planning to come clean to her” he answered

“What she never wants to see your horrible face after the way you treated her,” Alex said laughing “you really don’t know anything about women”

Ryan tried not listen to Alex and concentrated on making it to Anna. Which was difficult due to the blabbering woman next to him? Ryan wondered how Anna could stand her constant chatter. He couldn’t wait to reach the hospital so he can ditch her