The Perks of Being Heartless

Chapter Five

Chapter5

Monday: July 12, 2017

I feel like I’m about to vomit because of this scene in front of me – two couples in a sweet, intimate act of holding hands and kissing. I simply shook my head while finishing the last part of the story. I was assigned to create and encode the story plot based on the given outline. Kid and Letti only gave suggestions, but most of the time they do these horrible things in front of me while Russell laughed at the two. He looked from behind to check the progress of what I was doing and acted as though we're close. His phone could not be separated from his hand.

"Ms. Bitter, don't you envy them?" Russell asked teasingly. There he goes again. Every time he tells me something annoying, I lose my focus with what I am doing. I was irritated especially when I heard him say 'Ms. Bitter'.

"Stop assuming things!" I answered obnoxiously with a sneer. Why would I envy the two? Where did he get that idea? From the romance books he read? What a nonsensical assumption!

He only laughed, as though I said a funny joke. I didn't bother answering him. I ignored him and focused on what I was writing.

"Kid, babe..."

When I heard Letti say this, I snatched Russell's earphone without a word and put the speaker pods in my ears then connected the terminal to my phone. I chose random rock music from my audios and played it. This is so annoying. I want this collaboration to end because these two lovers in front of me suck. Even though I’m not looking at Russell, I know he's laughing. I know he’s laughing because the couches shaking a little. I sighed. Okay, Alex back to what you're doing.

A minute passed and I was about to finish my work when I noticed the couple was no longer on the couch with us. Where did they go? I didn’t notice them leave maybe because I was so absorbed with my work. I removed the earphone then stretched my arms upward. Too tired...

"Done?" I jumped in surprise when I saw Russell's face smiling beside me. I thought he was gone too. I didn’t see him there a minute ago – did I? I quickly turned my eyes away and tried to regain my composure.

"Yes, I’m done with the l-last part," I stammered. My eyes landed on the laptop screen. He sat beside me while his two hazelnut eyes read the last part I typed. His thick brows complemented his serious face. I secretly looked at him while his mouth moved without a sound. I decided to get my phone and go through my blog site.

I smiled when I thought of words to write on my blog.

× July 12, 2017 ×

→Alex (@Ms.AnonymousBlogger) published a blog post.←

Life is like a book. It begins with chapters and ends as a story. Just like being born and having to die, everything has its time.

After I posted it on my blog, I noticed Russell's sobs. Is he crying? Did Russell cry? Maybe I was only imagining things. Is he gay? I have never seen a man cry except in movies. But now Russell is crying?!

"Are you crying?" I asked.

When he heard me, he quickly wiped out the tears off his face.

"What a wonderful ending, Alex. Every word the protagonist said – I felt it as if I was in his position. This is heart breaking. The best ending I’ve ever read so far."

For a few seconds, I'm speechless with what he said. A realization hit me with the ending I made. I wish this could turn into reality.

Kid and Letti finished reading the last part. Their reaction was the same as Russell’s. They even said the same thing. Did I make that ending? Yes, Alex you made that ending. Don't act like you didn't.

I closed my eyes constantly saying this on my mind. If it wasn’t because of their help and ideas, it might have been hard for me to do my part as the encoder. Exactly! It was their idea in the first place. I’m not good in writing romance. It’s kind of painful for my side as a mystery/thriller writer. However, the last part was my idea and not their suggestion. They trusted me in writing the ending, and I gave it my everything just like what they told me to. I'm grateful that we're done with it. Even though romance is not my genre, I did my part with the best I could.

Then we decided to eat something when my stomach grumbled. My cheeks felt hot. Shame on you, Alex! They were laughing.

"Guys, I have to go now. Let's finalize everything tomorrow so we could submit it," I bid them goodbye after reviewing the last chapter. Russell cooked our lunch and it tasted good. Really good!

Kid and Letti waved goodbye at me. When I was about to open the door, I saw Russell wave at the two and walked towards me.

"Ms. Bitter, let's take a walk before you take your ride home," Russell said with a sweet smile which doesn't suit him. He looked hotter. Oops! Did I just say that? Is this still Alex or is someone else inside my body? I felt horrified with my stupidity.

"Okay, guys! Take care," Letti said with a grin on her face. I hate how she stares at us.

I nodded and simply smiled. Kid accompanied us outside the gate then waved goodbye.

We're silently walking along the sidewalk while the sun was setting. We were waiting for someone to break the silence. We passed by a bookstore and I noticed Mae inside talking to a tall young man about our age and they were standing by the pay counter. I wonder what Mae was doing there and who that young man is. Don't tell me, the guy is her – okay, boyfriend, and probably the guy wasn't a member of her team… maybe.

I looked at Russell and he was busy typing on his phone and was smiling unconsciously. I wondered who he was texting. Is it his girlfriend? Well, it doesn't concern me anyway.

"Who did you see?" he asked when he put his phone back to his jeans' front pocket.

"It's Mae..." I said almost inaudibly.

"Oh, your friend. I saw you frown," he said in a half joking tone.

I rolled my eyes. “It’s nothing. I'd rather talk with my other me than spill out everything to you," I said in a sarcastic tone.

"Bitter again, huh?" he said mockingly.

"Whatever!" I said. He laughed teasingly and some people started to look at us. My cheeks turned red with embarrassment. Stupid Russell!

***

July 15, 2017

Today would be the announcement of the winning group. I was silently sitting beside the table where the signage read, 'Romance genre'. I can sense the strong vibes surrounding the place. I can feel the suspense just by thinking of who will win. I saw Mae on the fifth table from where I was sitting. I know she’s as nervous as I am, seeing how uneasy she was. She was with her group mates who seemed to be silently praying for a miracle.

I wonder where Kid and Russell are. They're still not here. We should be complete now for this very important day. The announcer started to speak in front. Everyone stopped breathing for a moment – what a thrilling feeling. The prize would be a trip to a destination of your choice. The choices would be Baguio, Palawan or Boracay. The winning group will choose one with a cash amount. The winning entry will be published and the writers will write for Silver Publishing House. Of course, there are people here with many experiences; so, we possibly could not win but at least we tried our best and we’ve put all of our efforts into it. It is fine with us even if our story will just be ranked fifth.

Find your love in three weeks.

A story of two childhood lovers, who, no matter how strong the current of the roaring sea of circumstances set them apart, in the end, love will find a way, even though one of them gives up and only one of them still believes.

Even if it was the theme of our story, it cannot change my perspective towards love. It's just a heck of a fiction story and it would never apply in reality.

Within two weeks, Russell and I have been in good terms, and yes, he is always calling me Ms. Bitter, which I have already gotten used to by now. After what happened on my birthday, he became my comfort zone; although he annoyed me so much with his teases and corniness. He made me smile effortlessly even if I'm in a state of burden. With him, I forget my problems in life.

I got to know Letti more, and we became close. But sometimes her vulgar words are not likeable. They're right. We all have different stories in life. You can't judge anyone for who they are or what they are not; you never know their story.

Until now, it is still very painful for me that five days after my birthday, I saw my mom begging for my dad to stay and saw her tears stream down her pale face. But my dad ignored her with cold stares while pushing my mom away with his baggage. Michelle saw the scene too and it broke my heart into pieces for the second time. Michelle stood frozen, and tears started to roll down her cheeks.

I hate you dad! How could you do this to us?!

I blinked my eyes to prevent the tears from coming out. I hate it when someone sees me in a state of despair. Not now. It's not the right place to weep, Alex. Relax, hold on. You should feel happy now. I sighed and Letti noticed that I gave a heavy sigh.

"Are you alright, Alex?" Letti asked with a worried expression on her face.

"I'm fine, Letti. Thanks," I lied. She smiled and touched my hand, telling me everything's gonna be fine. I simply smiled.

He left us because of his f*****g mistress. I'm tired of it. All I want was for my mother to find her happiness even without my father. I'll do everything for her in order to make her happy, yet I know that on the other hand, it's not easy because every night, I always hear sobs. I know that it came from my mother. I want to hug her, I want to comfort her but I didn't do anything. I let her keep these sorrows to herself. Praying and hoping that someday, her tears will be gone and all the hurt she had will vanish forever. But how? How could I do that? How?

"Gosh! Alex, did you hear it? We won! We won!"

"Huh?" I was confused with what she said. I’m not on my right mind right now.

"Excuse me? Is Alex here or are you just a clone of her?" Letti said seriously and she looked at me in disbelief.

I was about to speak when somebody held my arm and guided me to stand up. I looked behind to see who it was and I was surprised to see Russell wearing an aqua-colored shirt and dark pants. He was smiling and he looks very handsome.

"They're waiting for us to step up on stage," Russell said urging me to move. I nodded and we came forward with Kid and Letti who were obviously with uncontained joy. There was great applause from the attending people.

All the pain and worries vanished from me when I saw my group mates happy as we received the award. Mae was teary-eyed while clapping her hands hard proudly.

We agreed to eat outside as a celebration for our win. On our way, Letti was blabbering how beautiful Puerto Galera in Palawan is. She was thinking where we could go for the vacation. I have no intention of going anywhere. I was just happy we won. She said she and Kid had gone there once and so she suggested that we should go there instead.

We arrived at a Filipino Restobar where they serve delicious value foods that are usually served in expensive restaurants but still affordable for our pockets.

Russell treated us so we didn't have to spend anything. Naturally we entrusted Russell with these since he has no girlfriend yet. He was kind of a hopeless romantic.

I sat beside Russell, while Letti and Kid were in front of us. We browsed the menu and a waiter came to assist us.

"Good evening! What would be your orders?" the waiter asked us joyfully.

"Hmmm one order of chicken adobo, a veggie salad, a cupped rice, and halo-halo for desert", ordered Letti.

"I'll go for that too but add two fried chicken wings," Kid told the waiter.

The waiter turned to us. "What about yours, ma'am and sir?" he said looking at me with a hint of flirting. I raised an eyebrow at him to tell him I'm not into his macho feature.

"Oh don't ask her. She's really bitter," Russell whispered to the waiter but I heard him. I elbowed him hard but he only laughed.

I hate him – I mean Russell, for making fun of me, and that stupid waiter who was winking at me.

"One chicken curry, lettuce salad with vinaigrette, two fried chickens, two pork sisig, one soup, Three extra rice, two leche flans and two halo-halos… Also add four beers and peanuts and two pineapple juice," I blurted fast. The waiter was dumbfounded.

Well, what's funny with that? I wanted to celebrate and I don't care. I looked at Russell whose jaw was dropped so low just like the waiter. I absent-mindedly brushed the loose hair strand and tucked it behind my right ear.

"What's the problem? A fly may enter your mouth," I told Russell covering his mouth with my hand. “That's our order,” I told the waiter who just regained his composure.

"You're voracious today, Alex. You're punishing the food not yourself with that. Haha! Just kidding," he said teasingly like a brother but I don't like his words.

"Wrong. Babe, Alex has no problems, right?" Letti looked at me and I nodded as a response.

"See, babe?" Letti said teasingly to Kid. Her boyfriend grabbed her and kissed her forehead.

"I know, babe. I'm just kidding."

Oh, sweet little lies. Why is it this way? Why is it that boyfriends and girlfriends are always on a red carpet, and then a few years after marriage, it turns into sour and bitter tears which end up with separated ways? Damn those people! Damn those daddies, self-seeking happiness! Enough, okay? We won and I am really happy right now so we are celebrating our victory.

I am comfortable with Russell. I admired his easy going attitude even though he lost his father. He's a nice guy. I busied myself with my food while they were talking. The food was excellent and I silently made plans to come back here sometimes myself. Hmmm, I liked the pork sisig.

I stopped eating when I noticed the silence. I looked at them and they were staring at me.

"What? Is there something wrong?" I said uncertainly.

"Friend, we're asking you a while ago if you agree that we go to Baguio. It's a romantic place and we haven't been there yet. Why not try that place and if you agree we will go there tomorrow," Letti said, her two dark eyes twinkling with excitement.

I choked when Letti said the word ‘romantic’. What am I supposed to do in that romantic place? And besides, if it's for couples why should I go there? Enjoy a romantic stroll with myself? What kind of joke is that?

Russell gave me a glass of water and he's laughing. Russell's stupid ass!

"It's a nice place but–"

“Alex, come with us. Pretty, please?” she said, trying to act cute. I looked at Russell who's moving his eyebrows up and down. I held my glass and drank the cold juice from it. It's my first time to go on a trip far away from home. Should I go with them or not?

"Are you fine with it, Ms. Bitter? Don't be such a kill joy. Just say yes. Don't worry, I'll be there and I'll take care of you. Trust me," Russell said with his warm smile.

"If you're afraid because it's far away from home, you can trust us Alex. It will be a safe trip. There’s nothing to be afraid of. Nothing as long as you're with us. Russ will be your partner since both of you are single," Kid barged into the conversation. He winked at me while his girlfriend stared teasingly at us.

"Who knows, maybe you two are meant for each other and destined to be together," Kid said.

"Excuse me, there’s no such thing as forever," I told them.

"Is that a yes?" Letti asked me.

"You're too choosy for a bitter lady," Russell chuckled.

I shrugged my shoulder. "Whatever, Mr. Romantic – wait, Mr. Hopeless Romantic," I smiled wickedly to him. The smile on his face vanished. Someone's offended, huh?

What now, Alex? They're waiting for your answer.

I closed the door of my room. It was already 5 PM when I arrived home. I stayed at Mae house after Russell treated us so I got home a little later. The house was as silent as an abandoned place. The silence was so painful to the ears and it’s so dark.

I was shocked when I saw my sister, Michelle, on my bed, hugging the picture frame of our dad. When I went near her, I saw her eyes swelling with traces of tears on her pale face. "Daddy… Daddy..." I got teary-eyed when I heard her calling out our stupid father.

"Michelle, Dad will never come back home. He left us! He abandoned us!" I said, controlling my emotions to stop my tears from falling again, but no matter how hard I tried to control my emotions, I can’t hold them back. These tears started to roll down. I wiped it using my cold hands.

I went to my working table where my laptop was. I switched the power on and after a few seconds, I started to browse through my blog site. I saw my notifications icon, clicked it and my attention started to focus on a comment from Mr. Commenter.

I wonder who the guy behind the name Mr.Commenter is. I want to thank him, because every time I read his comment, I can't help but smile even though it's somewhat irritating. I posted another blog for tonight. Again, a notification from him popped out in my notifications logo.

Who are you, Mr. Commenter?