Her heart, his soul

Shadows

*Sam*

"Could I talk to you for a moment in private, Sir?" I approach Kate’s father at the party, feeling a mix of excitement and anxiety boil within me.

He smiles warmly at me, and I must admit, the man intimidates me a bit. "Of course, Sam, but please, call me John. No need for the formalities."

We step a little away from the crowd, both leaning against the fence and gazing out at the sprawling fields. "So, I’m guessing this has something to do with my Kate?"

"Yes, sir... I mean, John. I love your daughter with all my heart, and I want to ask for your permission to marry her. I promise I can take good care of her." My hands fidget nervously. What if he says no? Kate may be 29 years old, but family means everything to her and I do not think she would go against her fathers wishes.

He takes a deep breath, studying me. "Why the hurry? You haven’t gone and gotten her pregnant, have you, boy?"

"Uhhh." My face flushes crimson. Oh no, what if her father considers premarital relations a grave sin? "That’s not the reason, I promise you, sir... I had planned this before she told me. I just want her to be my wife... because I love her."

"My little Kate is pregnant?" He stares at me, eyes wide. Oh no! This definitely isn’t how she intended to share the news with her father. All I can do is nod. "I’m going to be a grandfather!"

He stands there for a moment, lost in thought, staring off into the horizon. I nervously break the silence. "So, sir... uh, John. Do I have your permission?"

"Sorry, I just zoned out there, son," he says with a grin. "Yes, of course, you have my permission. In fact, I’m happy to see her finally found a good man. I was starting to worry she’d be taking care of her old father for the rest of her life."

"Thank you, sir... John. I promise I will take very good care of her... of them." I tell him as we walk back to the others, relief washing over me.

Kate catches my eye, and I smile at her to reassure her that everything is okay. Her father grabs a glass and clears his throat to get everyone’s attention. "Come here for a moment, Kate, and you too, Sam."

As we walk up, Kate’s eyes ask me what’s happening, and I shake my head, signaling that I don’t know. Her father puts an arm around Kate and announces, "Today, we are not just celebrating a new neighbor. No, we are celebrating the fact that I’m gaining a son and soon a grandchild, too! Sam just asked my permission to marry Kate, and of course, I said yes!"

The crowd erupts in cheers! Kate is enveloped in hugs, and I receive hearty pats on the back and congratulations from everyone. I manage to lean in and whisper in Kate's ear, "Sorry, love, I didn’t know he would do that."

"Don’t worry. I know my father. It's a good thing he really likes you, though," she replies with a grin before being pulled away by someone else eager to congratulate her.

Later, after everyone has hugged or congratulated me, I find a quiet spot on the little stairs leading up to my trailer, needing a moment to catch my breath.

Amidst all the joy, I can’t help but reflect on the pain that has shaped my journey.

6 months ago:.

I am losing my patience with Pamela. It has now been three months since she told me she is pregnant, and she keeps promising to break up with Max. But it still hasn’t happened.

Today, I send her a long text, insisting that she needs to decide now. I can’t do this anymore; it is slowly breaking me down.

Suddenly, there’s a knock on my door. I open it to find Pamela standing on my doorstep, her face streaked with tears. Before I can ask why she’s here, she practically throws herself at me, sobbing uncontrollably.

I pull her gently inside and close the door, wrapping my arms around her trembling body. “What is it, darling? What happened?”

“Oh, Sam. I am so sorry… I lost the baby. I started bleeding, and I lost it. I lost our baby.” She cries, and my heart shatters into a million pieces. No matter how conflicted I feel about Pamela and this entire situation, I had been so excited to become a father.

I just hold her tightly, feeling my own tears drip down into her hair. In an instant, with those few devastating words, the dream of fatherhood is snatched away from me. And now I have no hold on Pamela. Am I going to lose her too?

All thoughts of ultimatums fade away as everything continues as it is, except for me, slowly piecing myself together amidst the chaos. The weight of the moment hangs heavy in the air, and I know I must navigate this heartbreak with her, whatever the outcome may be.

Back to present time:

*Kate*

I settle onto the small steps beside Sam, sliding my arm around his waist. "Hi there, handsome. You look a million miles away."

"Sorry, my love. I was just lost in thoughts that are better left forgotten. Are you okay?" He glances at me, his eyes shadowed with unspoken memories. "I didn't mean to spill the news about the pregnancy to your father. He kind of guessed."

He pulls me closer, wrapping his arm around my shoulders and pressing a gentle kiss to the top of my head. I sigh, resting my head against him, feeling the warmth and safety of his embrace.

I let out a soft sigh, "I wish I knew who broke you like that, my love. But, in a way, it turned out lucky for me… it brought you into my life."

"Yeah, being here with you… experiencing this… it makes all the pain worthwhile," he says softly, a hint of something deeper lurking in his gaze. He lifts my chin with his hand, turning my face towards him for a kiss. I can’t help but wonder what shadows trail behind him. What haunted memories made him feel he had to run? But despite the uncertainty, I thank God every day for bringing him to me; he truly is a blessing.

After a moment, he stands, taking my hand. "Come on, little lady. Let’s dance under the stars, shall we?" I giggle, feeling a rush of excitement as I follow him onto the dance floor.

We twirl and sway beneath the shimmering lights, laughter bubbling up between us like a sparkling stream. Each kiss feels electric, igniting a joy I thought I would never know. I can hardly believe how happy I am feeling like I am wishing upon a star and watching all my dreams come to life.

But as we dance, I can’t shake the feeling that beneath the surface of our bliss, we’re both hiding something. The shadows of our pasts linger around us, threatening to seep into this perfect moment. I steal a glance at Sam, his smile bright but his eyes betraying a hint of sorrow. Perhaps we’re both just two souls searching for healing, trying to forget the pain that once shaped us. And yet, in this moment, in the enchanting Texas night, I hold onto the hope that together, we can create a future free from the shadows of our pasts.