Of Lilies Time and Remorse

Chapter 20

A week has passed since the smoke incident s***h Sixto s***h DL. Iba na talaga ang mga bagay-bagay. To tell you the truth, I'm getting used to it. It feels normal already. I admit there are still times where I'd stare at nothing and think about Sixto but DL's making a very good job in keeping me distracted.

He just said that he joined the game, Sixto was trying to end. Wala naman siyang sinabi na gusto niya ako. For all I know, what he said could have a  hundred possible explanations, interpretations or meanings. Ewan ko na lang.

Everything is going well. Naipasa ko na ang ibang subjects namin, and malapit na din kami matapos sa cheerdance. Good thing at cooperative ang mga classmates ko. They gave us their opinions and suggested us things, which helped a lot. Teamwork is really the key to a group's success.

We had lesser in mind, kaya kahit papano ay bumabalik na kami sa dati naming mga 'rituals'. Nakakapagbasa na ako ng libro tuwing gabi. I still have projects, and reviewers to make, but I have enough time. I'm not slopping naman, but I just made sure to have some fun too; by doing what I usually do before. 

DL has been officially my baby-sitter. We have gotten close, dahil sabay na kami umuwi, at nag-uusap kami. I didn't know what happened between him and Sixto, and I didn't bother asking. It's none of my business.

Bukod sa nakakatipid ako ng pamasahe, nakakatipid din ako para sa pagkain. Palagi niya kasi akong nililibre. I declined, but he's persistent. Minsan ay sinabihan ko lang siya na sayang ang pera, dahil busog naman na kami at masyado ng marami ang pagkain, hindi siya nakikinig.

Still, he's actually kind. Sa sobrang dami kasi, hindi namin naubos. He gave it to the street children. He's Tito Syne's son talaga. They have a lot of charity works and foundations. They are just really wealthy. He's an only child, kaya sa tingin ko ay sa kaniya mapupunta lahat. The De Loughrey family name really speaks 'old money'.

Palagi na din kaming magkasama. Among those times, I can't help but to compare him to Sixto sometimes...

Napakakuripot ni Sixto, but he's not madamot naman. Marunong lang talaga siyang humawak ng pera, na kung pwede ay hindi na niya bibitawan lalo na sa hindi naman importanteng bagay. DL on the other hand, doesn't care about his money.Magastos siya, pero mabait. Of course, status really made a difference. Sixto's family is rich but DL's family is really rich.

Sixto is really annoying, funny, and so extra. You'll always laugh at his silliness. There won't be any silent moments with him. Palagi kasi siyang may kwento. I love his speaking voice, and I can just listen to him talk the whole day. Syempre that was before our friendship drifted apart.

DL is the serious type. Hindi siya palaimik, at may sense lahat ng sasabihin. Minsan nga, siguro ay nagjojoke siya pero hindi ko gets kaya kailangan niya pang e-explain. He makes me laugh too. No, not because of his jokes, but because of his face that shows frustration every time he explains. We can be silent the whole day, and we wouldn't be bored.

I love the noise with Sixto, but I love the silence with DL too.

I was getting ready, dahil may pupuntahan kami ngayon. Wala muna kaming kahit anong school related activity, which is good. This Saturday is my free time.

I settled with a white mini dress. I paired it with a two-inched heel. I brought my silver sling bag, and put all my necessary things.

I combed my hair, and put a simple yet elegant hair barette. I applied minimal make-up too.

I went down and I found my parents watching a tv series. I guess they're okay. They couldn't come wit me because they have an appointment coming in a bit.

“ My princess looks beautiful”  I rolled my eyes at Papa.

“ You're saying that because I'm your daughter”

“ Hmm, partly true” he said as he touched his chin, as if having a deep thought.

“ Simplicity truely is beauty. You proved that, Lucy”

“ Ma, stop being dramatic”

“ I'm sorry, it's just that minsan lang kita makitang nakaayos. I really want to see you like that”

Sumimangot lang ako. Mom took a picture of me.

“ Ma!”

“ Isa lang naman eh”

Mom went to me and kissed my cheek. Papa took a picture of me and mom.

We heard someone called kaya, pinuntahan na ni Papa sa labas. Pinapasok niya naman si DL. DL greeted them both.

“ DL, naghanda ng maayos si Lucy. Ok ba?”

“ Pa!”

I could feel my cheeks burning. I'm probably looking like a tomato by now. Hindi man ako kasingputi ni Sixto at Gwendi, mahahalata pa rin naman kapag namumula ako.

“ She looks really.... fine po” he politely said. It made me roll my eyes.

“ Gusto din naming sumama at mawitness ang opening sa bagong gallery niyo but unfortunately, we can't. Next time na lang siguro DL.” mom said.

“ Okay lang po, Tita”

“ Sige, na baka malate pa kayo, importante ka pa naman doon DL. Sila Lev?”

“ Nandoon na po, tita”

Tumango lang si mama at iginaya kami palabas.

“ I can say, that you look really different” he whispered.

“ So gusto mo nakapants ako doon? Edi magmumukha akong tanga”

He laughed at what I said. Totoo naman. Magmumukha talaga akong pulubi at tanga doon kapag hindi ako nag-ayos. Syempre, formal event 'yun at karamihan sa mga bisita ay mayayaman. May mga art enthusiasts din doon. Magmumukha akong out of place kapag nasa normal get-up ako.

I glanced at Sixto's home. Maingay kasi at parang may nagkakatuwaan.

“ Have you invited them?”

“ Yes. We invited all our neighbors.” he said glancing at Sixto's home too.

“ Including him, Lucy” he continued while landing his gaze at my face. He's probably trying to see through me but I'm good at pretending that everything's fine so he saw nothing.

Sinabi ko lang naman na nasasanay na ako. Nasasanay pero hindi naman ibig sabihin okay na. Na okay lang.

I nodded at him. The door opened and Sixto with their friends from senior high went out.

One boy called and waved at DL. He looked at me, as if asking permission. I smiled and raised my brows as a 'yes'.

“ DL! Hoy! Hindi namamansin ah!”

DL put his arm on my shoulder as we went close to them.

“ Are you guys, ready?”

“ Syempre. May pagkain ba don?” tanong ng isa.

DL scoffed at him. The latter raised his hands and smiled.

“I think we haven't formally introduced ourselves” sabi ng pangalawang lalaki.

“ I'm Lyco by the way” he extended his hands which I gladly took for a shake.

“ Lucy” I said with a smile. He smiled at me too.

“ Ako naman si Daniel” he gave me a goofy smile.

“ Padilla?”

“ Hindi. Matsunaga”

The others laughed at him except for Sixto. He stared at me for a while and then looked away.

“ Pero seryoso. I'm Nathan”

“ Ang layo naman sa Daniel ng Nathan.” I jokingly said.

“ Magkamukha naman, kaya ayos lang” he said while winking at me. DL just shaked his head while Sixto put his arms on his neck. Like an arm lock. The other guy, and the girls mocked him.

“ Ano ba! Ako talaga ang kaaway niyo ha? Palibhasa ako ang pinakagwap— aack!” Sixto tightened his arm even more. Binitawan niya lang din naman ito kaagad.

“ Naniniwala na talaga akong unang mamamatay ang mga gwapo” Nathan said as he touched his neck while breathing heavily.

“ Hi! I'm Vishna!” the girl waved her hand at me and smiled. Ganoon din ang ginawa ko.

“ Lucy” nahihiya kong tugon kasi sobrang ganda niya pala sa malapitan. Nakikita ko kasi siya sa malayo lang. Mukha siyang manika.

“ Kilala mo na naman siguro si Hyacinth at Sixto diba?”  Nathan gave me a teasing smile.

“ Yes. Magkapitbahay kami ni Sixto. And I usually see them together, so I guess?” I said with a smile.

I looked at Hyacinth and she smiled at me. I didn't know if it's a mocking smile or what, basta ngumiti na lang din ako.

“ Sasabay kayo kay manong?” DL asked them.

“ Ano ba namang tanong iyan, syempre ikaw ang nagyaya tapos hindi mo kami ipapahatid?”

DL just rolled his eyes at Nathan. He turned to Sixto next.

“ Sasabay ka din, Six? Sila Tita?”

“ May nilakad pa eh, kaya sasabay na lang ako. Kita na lang daw kami don, D” he replied casually.

“ Yiee tinawag na niyang D. Di ka na po galit sir?”

Both guys glared at Nathan. He gave them a smirk and then looked at me and winked.

Dumating na din ang driver nila DL.

“ Let's go? Nandyan na si manong”

DL opened the door, and his friends went inside. Last na pumasok si Sixto. I held on to the door at susunod na sana ako sa pagpasok when DL held my hand. I looked at him, puzzled.

“ I'm bringing my own car”

I blinked. Binitawan ko ang handle sa sasakyan. I looked at his friends. Nathan plastered an amused smile. Hindi ba siya napapagod ngumiti?  Lyco was raising a brow, Vishna shakes her head.

I heard Sixto clicked his tongue...and Hyacinth looked at Sixto.

“ Oh”

DL closed the door, while still holding my hand. Ilang sandali pa, umalis na sila. Naglakad na kami pabalik sa bahay nila. He was in front me, kaya sinusubukan kong makahabol sa kaniya.

“ Kasya pa naman tayo.” I muttered habang patuloy kami sa paglalakad.

“ I don't think you'd be comfortable with them, Lus”

I bit my lip. I stared at his back. That was considerate of him. Pero kaya ko naman. I can act natural. I'm good at faking.

“ I'm good at pretending with everything DL” I whispered. I don't think he heard it though. But I was wrong.

He stopped by their gate causing me to stop too. He turned to me.

“ But I don't want you to pretend like everything's okay. I want you to be real” he said while giving me a smile. I stared at him for a second.

I smiled back at him.

“ And ”

“ And?” he asked with brows furrowed.

“ My hand” I shyly added.

He had long blinks, and looked at our hands.

“ Oh” His cheeks and ears where red as he let go of my hand.

He looked away and went ahead. I laughed at his embarrassed face. He looked cute.

DL turned the radio on. A song by Ben and Ben was playing. I just kept silent and listened to it.

I caught him humming and singing with Ben and Ben.

“ You know what? Bakit hindi mo na lang lakasan ang boses mo at ng marinig ko?”

“ What?”

“ Sus. Just sing. Can you sing for me?” I asked him. Sa tingin ko ay maganda ang boses niya.

“ No. Nahihiya ako” he firmly shook his head.

“ Please?” I turned to him and acted cute...

He stared at me for a while before looking back at the road.

He sighed and cleared his throat.

“ we tried giving in to the warmth ”

I stared at him for a while. That's it. He only sang a line.

He took a glance at me.

“ What? Are you in love? Have you finally fallen for me?” he said smirking.

“ Don't be conceited. Hindi ko nga narinig masyado eh” but of course, it was a lie. Kahit pa ang ikli lang ng kinanta niya, I perfectly heard his voice. It was soothing. It's like a voice of an angel.

“ Kaya siguro nabanggit ni Sixto na iha-hire ka niya para kumanta sa amin, dahil maganda boses mo. Pangit kasi sa kaniya” I absentmindly said while laughing.

After a few seconds, my laughter died. I just realized what I said. I want to smack my head o di kaya ay tumalon na lang. I admit I was being insensitive...

“ Yeah. I can sing for your date”

I looked at the window instead as I bit my lip. I calmed myself first before looking at him.

“ I guess it's really hard not to talk about Sixto, when you've spent too much time together.” he said while looking directly at the road.

I had long blinks as I press my lips with a slight frown.

Finally we were already in the gallery. He opened the door for me. I muttered a soft thank you.

Lumapit kaagad kami sa parents niya. There were a lot of cameras flashing. Nagsimula na din kaagad and then the ribbon cutting scene came. Everyone congratulated them.

Hindi lang pala mga art enthusiasts, friends, and relatives ang nandito dahil invited din pala ang isang orphanage. Sila pala ang chosen beneficiary para sa gallery nila na ito. Maraming mga bata, I guess they were orphans. DL and his parents were with them. His parents were talking to an old woman. Ang head siguro sa orphanage.

Nalaman ko na ito pala ang orphanage na pinanggalingan ni Tita Lev. Hindi naman sekreto na orphan si Tita. Parang isang branch na naman ito ng orphanage.

The photographers gathered us by group. We took pictures, hanggang sa kami ng lahat.

“ Okay, Let's take a picture of the couple, of course”

Tito Syne and Tita Lev posed together. They look really happy. Pinasali na din si DL para whole family na sila.

I was about to look around when the photographer carefully held my arms.

“ Let's take some pictures of DL with his date. ”

Pinalapit niya ako kay DL. My face heated as the guests clapped their hands and talked about us. It was really uncomfortable. I felt like someone was intently staring at me. I looked around, and I saw Sixto. 

His eyes were narrowed and his lips were tight. His gaze lingered for several minutes before he payed attention back at the woman he's with. It was Hyacinth.

DL held my waist lightly for the last shot. We both smiled at the camera.

Nasa function hall na kami, and food were served. It's not the usual opening kasi para talagang may birthday. Siguro gusto ang nilang magpakain. Hindi naman ako ganoon kagutom kaya I ate a light meal lang.

I saw a child na nahihirapan sa paghiwa sa steak niya. Agad naman akong lumapit and helped her with it.

“ Salamat po, ate”

“ Anong pangalam mo?”

“ Marie po.” she answered as she took a spoonful of her steak.

I looked at them, and they were staring at me. I felt bad but at the same way, felt happy. I fekt bad that children were being abandoned. Pero syempre, the parents have reasons. We shouldn't judge. I fekt happy to know that at least they are okay. Narealize ki din kung gaano ako kaswerte dahil may matatawag ako na pamilya.

Nakita ko naman na nahihirapan sila. Hindi siguro sila sanay gumamit sa cutlery. Ako din naman. I offered to help and they gladly asked me to help them.

Hindi ko namalayan na lumapit si DL sa amin.

“ Why aren't you eating?”

“ Busog naman na ako”

He smiled at the children and gave thr a high five.

“ Kuya DL. Ang ganda po ng girlfriend niyo”

I just smiled awkwardly.

“ Talaga Marie?”

Oh. So he knew them personally. Mabait talaga.

“ Opo. Sobrang bait din po. 'wag niyo po siya sasaktan ah?”

“ Ang dami mong alam, Jason” he said as he ruffled one boy's hair.

I asked DL kung saan ang cr. Naihi kasi ako. He offered to lead the way.

Habang naglalakad kami, we bumped into my cousin Gwendi.

She looked really shock to see me. Pinasadahan niya ako ng tingin. At saka ay pinaikot ako.

“ Hoy, Lucy. Ikaw 'yan?”

I rolled my eyes at her.

“ You look different. Wait, are you Sixto's date? I saw him kanina eh. As usual he annoyed me. I asked him kung asan ka sabi niya nasa 'kabit'daw”

Napaawang ang labi ko sa sinabi niya. That Sixto! She looked at the person I am with next. Para naman siyang nakakita ng multo.

“ This is DL. Anak siya ng may-ari? ” I introduced him to her. Though I'm not sure sa ginawa kong introduction.

“ Of course I know him” Gwendi shyly said. DL furrowed his brows.

Tinawag muna si DL ng parents niya, and Gwendi excused herself dahil may tumawag sa kaniya.

Naglibot muna ako sa gallery. I stopped in a corner. May nag-iisang painting doon. It was a painting of the lily of the valley flower. It was so majestic. Enchanting and magical in a way.

I felt someone's presence behind my back.

“ It's beautiful”

I looked at the person who spoke. I was surprised it was Sixto.

“ Yes ”

We kept silent. I was surprised tgat he started a conversation.

“ Do you know what the lily of the valley means?”

I looked at him. His eyes remained at the painting.

“ It symbolises the hope for someones happiness to be back.”

I stayed silent for a while.

“ Don't you think its sweet?” sabi ko.

“ But wishing for someone's happiness to be back,  no not wishing, but praying. It's kind of overrated for me” I added.

He raised his brows at me.

“  Overrated? You think so? My dear Lucy—” he focused on me.

“ You never really loved someone unless you pray for them” he continued.

I didn't know how to respond after that. So I stayed silent. Silence was the only thing heard.

“ Lucy”

We both looked at who called me.

“ DL” I said. He was with Hyacinth. Hyacinth immediately went to Sixto.

“ Hinanap kita. Kung saan-saan ka pa nagpunta.”

I looked away from them.

Sixto nodded at DL. He gave me one last look before going away with Hyacinth.

DL and I stayed silent and looked at the painting instead.

“ Do you know what the lily of the valley means?” he asked.

I bit my lip as I answered what Sixto told me.

“ Return for happiness? Like wishing for someone's happiness to be back?”

He nodded.

“ But it means something else too”

I tilt my head as I gave him questioning eyes.

“ Confessing that someone made your life complete.”

He pointed at something in the painting. My eyes widened in shock as I read the curved writing in the frame.

To Luciandy; my lily

I literally stopped breathing for a while.

“ It's not for sale, because it's for you, Lucy”

“ You've made my life complete” he put his hands on his pockets, as he leaned on me.

“ I have regrets before Lucy. If only I approached you first. If only I smiled at you, played with you, then maybe it should have been me.”

I bit my lip as I felt my cheeks burn. From embarrasment, overwhelmed? I don't know.

“ If only, I was first. Then maybe it should have been me, and not Sixto”