Resolutions For An Idyllic Living

Once, a young couple was gifted a beautiful baby boy. They were so happy to have him as he was as lovely as a bud going to bloom. They were blissful as never before. They were a happy family living in Delhi, India.  The baby was fine from his birth but he started getting weakened as days passed. One day, his condition got worse and its circumstances turned out to be life threatening for him. The doctors kept him under observation and the parents were not allowed to meet him. They could only see him from the window outside. The condition of the heart of his mother can not be expressed as words. She was not able to feed her baby and he was fed unnatural milk by a nurse. His father had a prayer on his lips all the time. They couldn't think of anything else but their only son. A few days passed, his condition started to get better miraculously.  He was finally discharged after a weak. His parents did not leave any more ways left to thank god. They took him home and everyone had a good sigh of relief. This baby was a fighter by his birth.  They named him Amaan Zubair.  He was so special for everyone in the family. He was loved and treated like a little prince. His days were spent by receiving gifts, being pampered and getting all the love in the world from his family. A year passed and his first birthday arrived. His family did all the preparations and planned a birthday party at their hometown, Aligarh, which was 133 kilometres away from where they were living. They came to Aligarh and invited every relative and friends to the party. The place was decorated with flowers and it looked exquisite. Everyone was overwhelmed by the hospitality of the members and the atmosphere of the place.  But Amaan was a little shy as a baby. When his mother brought him in front of the guests, he got nervous and started to cry. People tried to make his weeping stop but as more people got near him, his social anxiety increased. Hence, his sobbing never stopped. He finally stopped crying as all the guests left their house.  After the party, they came back to Delhi.  His second and third birthdays went the same as his first; he always cried whenever he was surrounded by a crowd of people.  His parents tried their best to help him with this problem. As he started to walk, they helped him meet people, starting with his cousins and family members. Further, they took him to parks, social places, so that his fear of meeting new people may reduce.  Eventually, his social anxiety lessened as he grew up. Amaan was growing and his parents had known that Delhi wasn't a perfect place for their beloved son to pursue his career and studies.  Though Delhi had many good schools and colleges, but a place is never defined 'good' just by its tall buildings and well furnished places, it is considered good by its atmosphere. The people there were not bad, it was just the environment that the younger generation had there; which was not good for an innocent and naive kid. A fraction of the children were involved in bad things. Plus, the air was polluted, which was also not good for Amaan as he had already suffered from some bad health conditions when he was a baby. In addition, Aligarh was called a hub of knowledge. So, they decided to migrate to Aligarh and got shifted. They started living in a big mansion, along with his uncles and aunts; hence, a joint family.  Some parents think that the education system has the responsibility of shaping a child into a great human. But it is not possible for a teacher to focus on a single child all the time as the teacher has to deal with a whole class of them. A child spends only 17% of time with a teacher. On the other hand, he spends the rest of the day at his/her home. So, who do you think is more responsible? Kids often don't open up to their teachers and are closer to their parents. A child listens to the person with whom he/she is attached emotionally.  Human brain starts growing in size by birth. It keeps growing to about 90%, nearly full grown - by age 5. In these years, a child learns to perform some basic human activities like walking and talking, etc. With addition, his psychological state also develops; his understanding and reaction to his/her surroundings. A child's brain is like a tape recorder and everything that he/she sees and hears, is stored in his mind like a tape. That tape keeps playing for the rest of his/her life, which is called the subconscious. It affects the way that he/she behaves without even realising, like performing day to day activities. This also includes the way he/she treats other persons, his/her way of talking, the way he/she treats others, etc.  Hence, as a child spends more time with his folks, he/she receives more tape (information) from them. So, the 60% programming of a child depends on his parents, and the rest on outside the home, i.e., school, friends, etc.  Before putting Amaan in a school, his parents did his programming in a way that most other parents don't.  When Amaan was a toddler, he had a remote control car that he liked so much. As he lived in a joint family, so many cousins lived along with him. One day, he was playing with his car and his first cousin came to play with him. He asked Amaan  play with the car and without thinking twice, little Amaan refused. His father was minutely observing them standing behind. Then he neglected the incident and went away from there.  After a while, Amaan was watching television. His is father came to him and asked him to go on a walk. He jumped from the couch with joy as he loved to go out with his dad. Then they headed out. As they were walking, a tree came in their way, which had one beautiful flower on it. The flower caught Amaan's sight and he started looking at it with his big, sparkly eyes. He liked flowers a lot. His father looked at him and he saw the longing in his eyes for the flower. He walked with Amaan towards the tree, stopped near it and plucked the flower. Amaan became very excited. Then father said nothing about the flower and starting walking. Amaan was waiting for him to give him the flower. But little did poor Amaan know, his father did not give him the flower and started talking about how his day went. Now the little boy became very confused thinking why his dad was not giving it to him. His all focus was on the flower in his dad's hand and he was not listening to what he was saying. His father saw him looking at it and smiled to himself. Then he  asked Amaan, "Do you fancy this flower?". He said yes. "Do you want it?". "yes" again. Then he exclaimed, "But this is my flower because i plucked it!". The boy became a little sad after hearing this. His father kneeled to the ground in front of him and told him, "as you know there was only one flower on the tree and i took it, and you liked it too. Although I have it, but it doesn't mean that you can't. You take it, keep it with yourself half way home and i will keep it the other half. Amaan became happy after this and took the flower happily. Then his father said, "Now tell me, did you deny your cousin to play with your car?" "Yeah" "You can play with your car because you own it, but it doesn't mean that your cousin can't play with it. As we will keep this flower in our half journey to home, we can both share it and we both will be happy. So you should let others play with your toys because they have the same desire as you had for this flower". These words hit Amaan so hard and he understood heartily everything his father told.  After they reached home, Amaan rushed to his room, took out his car and went out to look for his cousin. He found him in the yard and told him that he could play with his car. Then he handed it over to him. The other boy was so glad and both the boys played happily. Every time Amaan did some bad things like this, his father always made him right in a way that remained in Amaan's mind forever, that he couldn't make the same mistake twice. He became an obedient and a polite child. Father told him many great things and as a child, Amaan grasped all the knowledge he could wonderfully because his understanding with his father grew more and more as he grew up. Now, Amaan became four years old and they decided to admit him in a play school. But he was not quite a fan of going to school as he was always pampered in his home, liked to be at and he used to become nervous thinking about how things would go there.