Stellam Matutinam

Do I or Don't I?: Part II

Nessa returns with a much needed drink whilst question us on why her name was mentioned in her absence, the cousins then start ripping on her and inform that they were speaking nothing but s**t about her.

Laughing and being forced to agree only I wouldn't so much as say forced, I feel myself relax a little more with Nessa's presence beside me on her five seater couch a pale bronze colour to match the off-white carpet.

The walls however are a soft honey hue with that same white trim following around the window and door frames, my eyes following to where the carpet is cut off and is replaced with plain alabaster tiles as you step into the kitchen.

With the cupboards underneath the bench space the same colour as the kitchen tiles, the soft honey walls spill into the kitchen also to help the mounted alabaster cupboards stand out, eventually my attention averting to the path leading towards the rest of the house and ponder on what Nessa's room would look like.

"Now we can't get too drunk or otherwise we won't make it to the pub. Well we'll make it there; it's just a matter of will they let us in." Nia announces when the music's turned up louder and more cigarettes are being passed around, Nessa once again telling me to leave my cigarettes alone when she halts me in the process of reaching for mine.

"Hey come with me, we have to get you that handbag remember?" Nessa reminds me as Nia and Lissa take over the conversation between the two of them.

"Oh yeah, I forgot about that." I reply shyly as we both rise from our position on her couch and make it to a doorway that leads into another opened area where the dining room appears to be with another doorway at the back of the room leading to where I assume her and her parent's bedrooms are.

Following behind and admiring the painting dotted here and there on the same honey colour that soon changes to a nice pale navy blue yet the same pale bronze carpet stays as we enter her room, passing her parent's room which the door was closed as well as the toilet and bathroom.

The bathroom wasn't anything special apart from the huge arse mirror they had as well as decent bench space in their for her makeup since her parents apparently have an ensuite bathroom attached to theirs.

I'm a little blown away by how much stuff takes up Nessa's large room, a built in wardrobe half-cracked open and displaying enormous amounts of hung items all squished in as neatly as possible though the amount that's there makes it quite impossible.

"I honestly have to get rid of half this shit." Nessa announces from within the wardrobe as she rifles around for what I assume is a bag for me, my eyes still too intrigued by what's around me to really say anything other than chuckle in response.

Her queen bed with a large leather headboard and topped with a white duvet and black trees representing an eerie forest as well as matching pillows, is centred at the back wall as you walk into the room, a leather frame also at the foot of the bed though not as tall with drawers on the sides of the bed instead of bare space underneath.

Two matching side tables that same leathery material sits on each sides of the bed along with lamps on both the same tone as the side tables they sit under, her pull up blinds replaced with blackout curtains a few shades lighter than the carpet yet drawn open to let the darkening sky know what we're doing.

To the left of the door as you walk into her room's a forty or so inch flatscreen mounted to the wall high enough so she can see it from whatever position on her bed, a cane washing basket to the far right corner and a cubed shelf where all of her books and other Knick knacks are stacked for display.

"Here you go, I think this'll look great with what you've got on." she informs once confirming a hundredth time to herself it's the one.

It's similar to her one only it's without a chain strap and an inch or so smaller than hers, the only thing stopping me from taking it is the fact that it's Gucci and that s**t ain't cheap.

"Come on it won't bite." she giggles when I'm still hesitating whether I should take it or not.

"But it looks expensive and I'm worried I'll ruin-"

"Well it's yours so that doesn't bother me." she shrugs nonchalantly before placing it in my hands and forcing my hand to close around the item.

"Thank you Nessa, this is awesome." I reply meekly with half a smile tugging at the left side of my mouth, our conversation soon interrupted by Lissa knocking on the door.

"Yeah come in, I was only grabbing Lil a bag." she informs her cousin who's a little slow with her incoming until realising what we're doing.

Thinking that Nessa might have said something to her cousins and putting me off her a bit, I'm hoping my assumption is wrong and Lissa just didn't know if she was interrupting a conversation or not.

So putting it down to that I follow the two babbling girls before the name Josh peaks my attention and suddenly I'm zoning in to the conversation.

"Yeah he said he couldn't come tonight because he had to work." Nia goes on and automatically my curiosity is getting the better of me for I'm now blurting out the question.

"Oh he's just our other cousin, he was saying he couldn't make it but I'm sure we could arrange a time to get us all together down at the pub or at mine again for more drinks if you're interested after tonight?" Lissa offers with Nia and Nessa appearing to be happy with the fact that I've been invited out with them again and that I'm clearly not too awkward for them.

"Sure, that sounds awesome." I smile and for the first time it's not nervous or awkward, it's genuine and actually excited to hang with them again.

"Great we'll lock it in once I've spoken to him, only because I don't know when his next day off is." Nia picks up where her sister left off, all attention now on the girl necking the rest of her drink before she's up offering the next round.

"Oh I'm still good, thank you." I state whilst holding up my half-emptied can, the sisters giggling and taunting me to catch up whilst Nessa's telling them to leave me alone yet there's a grin present on her face.

Laughing with them I decide to smash the rest and demand that she get me a can then since she wants to play it like that, the girls pissing themselves laughing before Nia's announcing that it's time for us to hit the road.

Agreeing we grab our traveller drinks and do just that, my heart does race when I think about being seen on the streets by the Cops so I make a split second decision to keep behind the taller ones in the group, but also make sure it's not obvious that I'm trying to hide since that's the last thing I need right now.

Soon the worry of being seen by the Police is pushed to the back of my tipsy thoughts the more alcohol that slides down the back of my throat, my soul feeling finally free after so long of being locked away from the rest of the world and am happy to thank the alcohol for loosening me up for the first time in years.