WANTING A DEAD GIRL

Tying my hair in a bun and straightening my tie, I looked at myself in the mirror and self-pity enveloped me, ‘what a miserable life.’ I sighed inwardly as I stared at the time on my phone and, seeing I literally, have 10 minutes to get to work, I grumbled slightly annoyed about how today is already increasingly annoying but do I have a choice? No I don’t, in this world the poor gets poorer and the rich gets richer and i am poor and I had better get used to being a worker bee to survive. Leaving my shabby apartment, i carefully jumped the diapersotten food garbage in the front yard as i walked briskly to get to the bus stop on time, ‘I can’t be late again’ I muttered to myself, clearly oblivious to the speeding cab driver. “Hey, watch it stupid cab guy!” I screamed at the top of my lungs as i tried desperately trying to clean the dirty muddy water splashed on my pristine white t-shirt and also my already rumpled trousers, but unknown to me, the cab driver heard my cursing and sped backwards as he splashed even more muddy water all over me again, surprised and in utter shock i picked up a stick and swung at the cab man as he sped away. “Urrrrhg!! Today can’t be any worse.” I screamed to myself, as i knew I’d miss my bus and worse, I couldn’t go home or my homeowner would find me, and I was so late. My boss wouldn’t spare me this time ‘why I’m i so unlucky’. I muttered, taking deep breaths trying to steady myself, so the next best thing was to go to the lost and found. Finally, changing out of my muddy-water drenched clothes, I chose to wear a hoodie and an ankle-long rap skirt as that’s the only decent thing available, looking like my bank account and like a homeless granny i decided to swallow my pride and just go to work. ‘Boss is going to kill me either way’ i mumbled looking at myself but with no choice in the matter, I paid the kind old man in the counter and quickly left, using my lunch money to hail a cab to work. ** Sneaking into the office building, Lilith hoped that the hoodie's head cover would prevent anyone from spotting her, but her luck was truly not on her side. “Lilith Orlando!!” Her boss called as he stared at her from the second floor. Looking at her, he felt livid, he hadn’t seen a more unserious and unhappy person in his entire life. At first he just wanted to be nice and give her a job, but in all he’s experience with her, he only experienced her tardiness and a gloomy aura around her which even scared he’s precious customers away, but she was good with numbers so he’s tolerated her and put her in a room far from the everyday people and only expected her to be early to avoid he’s precious customers but no she couldn’t even still do this simple tasks. Fidgeting slightly, Lilith clasped her hands together behind her as she stood in front of her boss as she watched him write something and wishing in her heart he pardoned her one more time, but again she didn’t expect to be caught so easily and was already crafting how to bail herself out of the situation. “Sir, it's not what you think, today I was held...” Lilith was suddenly interrupted by her boss's raising of his hand. “I don’t want to hear anything, you were late and that’s final.” Her boss said with a stern look. “but sir, I could explain if you’d just...” “Don’t bother, you are suspended from this moment, till I can find someone to replace you. Your duties in the office are on hold as you are dismissed.” Stretching out his hand, he held a letter of suspension as he directed Lilith to take it. Being shocked was an understatement. What? When did it escalate to this? ‘f*ck whatever is looking over me and damn my luck’ Lilith sighed dejected and helpless, there was no use begging her boss as he was, an old, rude and selfish money-hungry man. Taking the letter, she looked at the man one last time with frustration, feeling her heart as she quickly left his office, not wanting to cry in front of him, ‘not right now Lilith’ she muttered as she tried desperately to hold back her tears and frustration. Walking down the hallways and lost in thoughts ‘my rent is due, and that stupid pervert homeowner is on my neck for his money’ ‘Urrrrhg! Why now and I didn’t even get my month’s pay check’ “ Lilith!!!!! Lilith!!!!” Is someone calling my name? Lilith asks herself as she comes back to reality from her numerous thoughts. “Huh?” Lilith says as she stares at her short Japanese friend that is stationed at the medical unit, wondering why she was around this part of the office. “I’ve been calling your name for so long, but no, Miss Lilith was in lala land, what are you always thinking and gloomy about ?” Lilith's short Japanese friend rambled on and on. Well she was sorry for being absent-minded. She didn’t expect anyone to talk to her(she had no working friends except this, her Japanese friend, who only used her as a lab rat in her experiments most times) and she didn’t blame her little friend as she knew she doesn’t know half the things she’d been through and also trying to remember her short Japanese friends name was a problem as she didn’t know how’d she communicate without saying her name ‘Gosh! Lilith, you are a big fool sometimes’ she inwardly grumbled as she just watched her short Japanese friend still ramble on and on, making Lilith realize she’d spaced out again. “So that’s why I’d need your help in my office to try out the new machine being brought in, as you know you are the only person in this barbaric office that i genuinely get along with and the only one who agrees to these sorts of requests, so will you come do this for me please?!!!” Her friend finally finished, as she stared at her like if she’d said no, she’d burst out crying, ‘now that I’m fired, I wonder Who will be her new lab rat? Lilith thought as she agreed. “Sure” Lilith says as she really did need a distraction from her already miserable life and this was it. ** “As your doctor, this is the brain scan procedure to know if the equipment is good for consumer purpose and also you shouldn’t be scared as, it would just take 15 mins, and we’d be done so relax” “Ok” Was all Lilith's replied as she wondered when her Japanese friend became her doctor, ‘Taiwan that’s her name ‘yes I finally remembered‘ and 15 mins to think about how terrible my life is yes sure sign me up. 3hours later..... “Taiwan? What’s wrong ?” Lilith asks her friend as her 15 minutes has turned to three hours and yes, she’s grateful for the distraction, but it’s almost work's closing hours and her boss wouldn’t like to still see her here. “Taiwan speak to me already if the boss...!!” Lilith was still saying when she caught sight of her friends scared expression, seeing the fear and literal cold sweat cascading down her friends face, Lilith stopped talking and took hold of the results that her friend had been studying since the brain scan 3hours ago. “What’s all this words?” Even still taking the papers that made her friend visibly fear, Lilith didn’t understand what the whole paper report meant as she wasn’t a medical student or practitioner to know how to decode the meanings on the paper or why it caused so much fear for her friend ‘was the machine bad or..’ looking at her friend for questions , she was shocked to see Taiwan already besides her with face full of tears and it confused Lilith greatly. “Taiwan I’d ask again, what is happening!!!, why are you tearing up besides me ?” Lilith asks again feeling confused and wanting to leave. Too much has happened today and coping with her friends drama? She just couldn’t. “I’m sorry, but you have brain cancer Lilith and you are in the last stage of the disease and with my reports you have only two months to live.” Taiwan hurriedly said tears falling down her already reddened face as she held Lilith's hand in support. With nothing left to say Lilith couldn’t believe her ears, but instead of crying like her little friend she could only burst into a fit of laughter ‘dying in two months, just my freaking luck as usual’.