A Wife's Regret

Chapter 8

CHASE KARSON MANJARES' POV

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I smiled at my daughter nang makita ko ito. I sat in front of her pagkatapos kong kuhanin ang bag niya.

"Ayos ba? G'wapo ba si daddy?" I asked, showing her my polo.

"Yes, daddy!" nakangiting anito.

"I'll always try to look good, so they'll stop bullying you."

"But you always look good! You're always handsome, daddy!"

Muli ko itong binigyan ng matamis na ngiti at kinuha ang kamay niya. "Let's go."

Hindi pa kami nakakalayo nang tawagin siya ni Xeri, ang best friend niya na kapitbahay namin.

"Eli! Hello, Uncle Chase!"

Ngingitian ko rin ito. "Hello."

"Xeri, where's yaya Gigi? You have a new yaya na?"

"No, Eli! She's not my yaya. She's my sister!"

Napatingin naman ako sa babaeng may hawak sa kamay nito. Nakangiti ito while looking at the two kids.

"Wow! She's pretty!"

"Of course, just like me. Ate, meet my BFF, Eli. She's our neighbor!"

"Yeah... I know. Hi, Eli. How are you?"

"I'm good. It's nice to meet you!"

Bumaling sa akin ang babae and smiled at me as well. She was really pretty, just like her little sister, Xeri.

"Hello. Are you her brother?"

Umiling ako. "I'm her father."

Mukhang hindi naman nito inasahan ang sagot ko. Ganoon pa man ay inabot pa rin nito ang kamay sa akin.

"I'm Serenity, but I don't want to be called that way, so you may call me Reni instead."

Sinilip ko pa ang kamay ko kung may naiwan pang langis dahil masyadong malinis at maganda ang kamay nito na parang puting papel. Nang makasiguro ay inabot ko rin ang kamay nito.

"Chase."

"Chase..." Ulit nito, still smiling at me. "It's nice to meet you."

Binawi ko rin agad ang kamay ko.

"Uhm, do you have service? Are you going home now?" she again asked.

"We'll just ride a jeepney," Eli answered her.

"Oh, gusto niyong sumabay? Come on. It's totally fine. My sister and your daughter naman are best friends. I guess I'll be seeing you most of the time starting now."

"Let's go, daddy!" Excited na sabi ni Eli.

Marahan na lang akong tumango rito. I sat on the passenger seat at nasa likod naman ang dalawang bata.

"Xeri had been telling me lots of stuff about your daughter noong nasa Australia pa ako," she said while driving. "I guess they are really close friends. They know each other well already."

"Yeah..." Matipid na sagot ko.

"Anyway, I'm sorry, I thought you were her brother."

"It's fine."

Wala nang kumibo pa sa aming dalawa after that. Ang naririnig ko lang ay ang kwentuhan ng dalawang bata sa likod ng sasakyan.

I cleared my throat bago muling magsalita. "Can you drop us at Mate's?"

"Mate's?" she asked.

"'Yung pinaka-malapit na talyer sa village."

"Oh, I'm sorry. Kakauwi ko lang since a few days ago after so many years, so... I really don't know a lot of places around the village yet. Can you please just... tell me the way?"

"Sure."

"You own that business?" she asked.

"No... trabahador lang ako."

"That's nice. That's a great job. So, you went to their school just to fetch your daughter?"

"Yeah..."

"Wow... mukhang workaholic ka for still going back to work after picking her up. That must be so tiring, but she must be so proud of you."

It was obvious that she lived for long years abroad. It was evident in her accent.

"My daddy is working every day and night, even weekends, and I'm really proud of him!" Eli butted in.

Napangiti ako nang bahagya ang the woman beside me released a soft laugh.

"And I guess I was right. You are also a good father."

I no longer say anything else. I wasn't really used to talking too much with the person I had just met.

Nadaanan lang din ang talyer pauwi ng bahay kaya naman halos hindi ko na kailangang ituro sa kanya ang daan.

Bumaling ako rito pagtapat ng sasakyan sa talyer. "Thank you."

She smiled at me. "You're welcome, sir."

"Thank you, Ms. Reni!" pasalamat ni Eli rito.

She chuckled. "You're welcome, little cutie."

Pinagbuksan ko ng pintuan sa backseat si Eli. Nagpaalam din siya sa best friend niya.

"Bye, Xeri! See you at the window!"

"Bye, Eli!"

Mula sa kwarto ni Eli, kita ang kwarto ni Xeri kaya naman madalas pa rin nilang kawayan ang isa't isa na tila hindi nagkikita araw-araw.

Nagtatakbo agad si Eli sa talyer. Hinintay kong umalis ang sasakyan ng mga ito pero bumababa pa ng sasakyan si Reni.

"Uhm, I wonder if... I can get your number?" she asked. "I guess you're busy, so maybe I can help? P'wede kong isabay si Eli pauwi since... hindi naman pala out of the way itong talyer. It will save you time."

Simple akong humugot ng malalim na hininga. Sandali ko pa iyong pinag-isipan but maybe I would be really needing her help in case of emergency. Natatawagan ko kasi si Gigi noon ang yaya ni Xeri kapag hindi ko ito masusundo.

Eventually, I gave her my cellphone number.

She again smiled at me. "We'll go now."

Muli nitong kinawayan si Eli bago tuluyang pumasok sa loob ng sasakyan. Pinanuod ko lang iyon papalayo bago ako pumasok sa loob.

"Woah!" sigaw agad ng mga ito.

"Chick 'yon ah!"

"Masama 'yan, pre! Bigay mo na lang sa akin!"

"Iba talaga ng magandang lalaki, matinik sa magagandang chicks!"

"Eli's hearing all of you."

"What's a chick, daddy? Is that a chicken?"

I chuckled at kinuha ang balikat nito. "Don't mind them."

Dinala ko siya sa comfort room. Pinagpalit ko siya ng damit at sinuotan ko siya ng tsinelas.

Binilhan ko na rin siya ng merienda sa kabilang tindahan para makapag-merienda na siya habang nagtatrabaho ako. Madalas ay ganoon ang routine naming dalawa dahil walang mag-aalaga sa kanya sa bahay. Pag-uwi ay tinutulungan ko siya sa homework niya at pinapatulog bago ako pumasok sa club.

Kinabukasan ay nakasabay namin ang mga ito sa paglabas ng gate. They were already inside their car at huminto sila sa tapat namin.

"Hop in, sumabay na kayo sa amin ni Xeri."

Hinila agad ako ni Eli palapit sa sasakyan. Pumasok agad ito sa backseat katabi si Xeri at wala na akong nagawa pa kung hindi ang sumakay na rin sa loob ng sasakyan.

"Good morning," nakangiting bati nito when I sat on the passenger seat.

I wasn't used to talking to other people I barely knew, but with respect, I did also greet her.

"Good morning."

Eli told me na sabay na lang sili ni Xeri papasok sa school and she assured me that it was totally fine with her.

"Thank you," I told her pagdating sa talyer.

"Don't worry about fetching Eli. I'll drop her here after school."

Tiningnan ko si Eli mula sa rear at abot tainga pa rin ang ngiti nito.

"That's fine, daddy! I won't forget to message you."

Bumaba na rin ako ng sasakyan. Dumukwang ako sa backseat to kiss my daughter.

"Take care, love you."

"I love you, daddy! Don't get tired too much today!"

I released a soft laugh. Pinanuod ko ang sasakyan ng mga ito palayo. Naging sentro na naman ako ng tuksuna pagpasok ko sa talyer.

"Ibang klase!"

"Nakahanap na ng driver!"

"Mommy na ba tawag sa kanya ni Eli?"

Napailing na lang ako sa kalokohan ng mga ito.

"Buti nga sana kung may iba na talaga 'yan," ani Kaloy. "Baka bigla akong magpa-lechon."

"Ayos, tamang tama sahod na!"

My salary wasn't that much. Inabot ko kay Kaloy ang porsyento ng utang ko but he refused to accept.

"Doon mo muna ibayad sa inutangan mong malaki ang interes. May ipon pa naman kami. Hindi mo kailangang magmadali."

Humugot ako ng malalim na hininga. "Salamat, pre."

"Ikaw pa ba, lakas mo sa akin. Basta ikaw, nanginginig pa."

Mahina ko itong tinawanan. Sana ay magawa kong i-budget iyon. Habang tumatagal lalong lumalaki ang interes ng mga utang ko at mas nahihirapan akong bayaran ang mga iyon.

Lumabas agad ako nang marinig ko ang busina sa labas. Bumaba ng sasakyan si Reni.

Bumaba na rin agad si Eli na walang suot na sapatos ang kabilang paa.

"What happened to you?" agad tanong ko rito.

"Daddy, nasira 'yung shoes ko while I was playing at school."

"Yeah, I saw her like that earlier. No worries, I carried her to the car."

Nakaramdam ako ng hiya rito that she had to do that.

"Thank you so much."

"It's okay. It's no biggy. It seems like you're busy. We'll go now."

Wala sa loob na napatingin ako sa damit kong marumi. She still smiled at me bago pumasok sa loob ng sasakyan niya.

Tiningnan ko kung maaayos pa ang sapatos ni Eli pero mukhang wala ng remedya iyon.

Tinapos ko lang ang trabaho ko at umalis na rin kami ni Eli sa talyer. She was very excited na pupunta kami sa mall.

Gabi na rin kaya naman hindi na ako umuwi para maligo. Baka mapagsaraduhan na kaming dalawa ng mall.

She was excited to fit new shoes. I was happy seeing her happy. Tapos na naming bilhin ang sapatos niya pero napadaan kami sa shoe section.

"Wow, daddy, look! It's nice."

Tiningnan ko ang hawak nitong isang malaking kahon ng manika. I looked at the price kaya lang ay... libo-libo ang halaga no'n.

Tiningnan pa nito ang iba at sa bawat hahawakan nito ay tinitingnan ko ang presyo. I was looking kung may kaya kaming bilhin, but nothing.

All were expensive.

I just looked at my daughter enjoying to window shop. I let her touch whatever she wanted to touch. It felt good and felt bad... seeing that smile and excitement on her face.

"I want this, daddy!"

Tiningnan ko ang presyo ng nakuha nitong laruang manika, but it also costs thousands.

Umupo ako sa tapat niya. "That's really nice, but... I can't--" I stopped. I didn't want to tell her that I couldn't buy it. "We will buy that... soon. You'll have it."

Ngumiti ito sa akin. "I know we can't buy this now, daddy, but I will study hard and work so I can buy this and we can buy whatever we want. I will also buy new shoes for you, so you don't have to wear shoes with holes at the bottom."

Hinipalos ko ang buhok nito and chuckled, trying to stop my tears from forming. "No, study hard because it's your dream. Don't think of me. I'm always fine. Daddy's always strong."

"I'll think of you because I will always take care of you."

Hinayaan kong kumirot ang dibdib ko. It was always my frustration that I couldn't give her everything she wanted. I hated na minsan... kahit simpleng bagay, hindi ko pa magawang ibigay para sa kanya.

"Daddy, look! It's mommy!"

Napatingin ako sa direksyon na tinuro nito. I really did see Lia. Tumitingin ito ng mga damit.

I stared for a while. As always... she looked perfect.

"Let's go to her!" Akmang tatakbo si Eli palapit sa kanya pero agad kong kinuha ang braso niya.

"No..."

Agad itong napabusangot. "But why daddy? I just wanna say hi."

Humugot ako ng malalim na hininga. Lia didn't want us to go near her especially in public kaya lagi itong nagagalit kapag nagpupunta kami sa bakeshop.

"H-Hindi ka pa ba... nagugutom?"

"Hmm, I'm hungry na, daddy."

Ngumiti ako rito. "Let's eat then..."

Kinuha ko ang kamay niya. Muli akong sandaling tumingin sa direksyon ni Lia bago ko hilahin ang kamay ni Eli papunta sa foodcourt. Madalang kaming magpunta sa mall that's why I bought all the foods she wanted to eat.

Abala ito sa pagkain ng burger nang tumingin sa akin. "You won't eat, daddy?"

I shook my head. "Busog pa ako."

"You can share with me." Inabot nito sa akin ang burger niyang may kagat, but I just smiled at her.

"Busog ako kapag busog ka."

Pinagmasdan ko lang siyang kumain. I wished I could give her everything... because I always felt like breaking kapag hindi ko naibibigay ang gusto niya. But then... she never complained and never got mad at me. Instead, she would always smile and tell me she would study hard for us.

I don't care if I'm hungry. What's important is she's full. I don't care if I don't have proper clothes to wear as long as she looks good. I don't care if I'm tired as long as I can give her what she needs.

Eli... she's the one keeping me alive. Handa akong gawin lahat para sa kanya kahit ano pang maging kapalit.