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Saudade

9 March 2008

I'm in the States with Paulo and Dinis for the past 8 days and I'm going crazy here,I've being working with the RP team to deal with the image issues and seem we are on something’s but now they drop this bomb on me and I'm trying to reach to K but I can't get to her. I'm supposed to say in this press conference that I'm single and not hiding from finding love. There's no way that will ever happen if I don't speak with K first.

I knew being away would be hard but as been excruciating when at the studio, with the RP team or working out with Mike the PT I can get by, but the nights arekilling me and it's starting to get to noticed, yesterday Will just toke me aside and asked me if I'm using. The problem is precisely that I'm not using I'm missing my Kaylaine my drug of choice.

I hear Paulo shooting out at me:

" Danny, K is on Skype!" I run down the stairs and grab the laptop and take it to my room.

"Hi babe, miss you so much! You're wearing my shirt?"- She sniffed the shirt

"I hadn't washed it yet, smells so good, I got at least 10 texts saying you are in despair need to speak with me"- she laughed

"Sorry, babe. It’s this shitty situation, the RP people want me to say that I'm really sorry about all the mess I had done before, I was in a really bad place back then but I got some help and I'm back on my feed. Now the f****d part, they want me to say that the girl that said she was my girlfriend was very important in my life back then but we are over now and I'm single and not hiding from love. f****d up hey??"

“Not really it makes sense, I'm not loving it but think with your brains, most of the new songs are love songs, you need the girls to go crazy over your, if you get the girls the boys will follow"- really she just said that??

"K? Are you throwing me under the bus??"-I can’t believe this girl.

"See it on a bright side your girl is telling you tell all other girls you are fair game what are you complaining about?"- She gave me a naughty smile

"Now for real!! I trust you Daniel is not because half of the girls in American want to take you to bed that you will go it depends on you not on them babe. De I have to go I've a math exam next, wish me luck! Adore you, babe!"

"Love you to, K. You don't need luck, you are Kayla."

Can't wait to have her here with me only more 8 days to go.

Since I arrived I went to this 2 parties didn't stay for long but was enough to feel the pulse of my image, seems the RP guys are doing a great job they really cleaning up my mess well.

K

After 11hours inside of airplanes 5 hours in airports we final arrived at Newark airport and after all the passport and visa control we are at arrivals looking for Paulo but we ended up finding Dinis, he's taking us to the studio were De is because is on the wayto the house Will have rented De is staying in New Jersey because is nearly the studio and the guys said that the house is great in a private neighborhood. I'm really excited to be with De but I'm also really tired I never sleep on flights so I'm awake since 4am even if now is 2pm there's a 5h time difference so as soon as I get on the car I blackout, I wake up with kisses, I know this smell, I open my eyes and here he is my deep blue eyes there are dark circles around them, my perfect lips, his hair looks different, he looks tired.

“Hi baby girl, did you miss me?” – He asked me with his forehead on mine.

I kissed him with all my heart; I couldn’t have enough of him.

“When we stop too breath he asked me with a smile:

“That much?”- Is this smile that makes me melt, there was a knock on the car window.

“We have to go inside, come on I want you to meet everyone!”- He said excited.

“Are you sure about that?”- I asked

“Of course babe it’s my team, there’s no problem”- He says helping me exit the car.

We enter the studio holding hands and the first person that I see is Dinis, he comes to me pulls me up and says:

“ Thanks God K, I couldn’t take it anymore he is driving us crazy, I always liked you girl but I never thought I would be so happy to see you”

“Come on it can’t be so bad!”- I smiled back at him.

“No, is worse!!”- Says Paulo giving me a kiss in the top of my head.

“Come on babe, you know that’s not truth I have been in my best behave”- He takes me from Paulo and Dinis leaving them with Liz and takes me near some other people.

“Mika, Jezz, Will, this is Kayla, K, Jezz is my producer Mika is his wife and Will is my agent.”

“Come here girl, we heard that guy speak about you so much we fell we know you already”- Said Mika giving me a hug

We stay for a few minutes and then De takes me inside were the musicians are to introduce me to Mattew, Axel and Brian.

“Hi guys nice to met you all”- I say

“Kayla we are really pleased that you final arrived maybe now that guy stops nagging us”- Mattew says looking at De.

“I promise I’ll do my best to help”- I said smilling at them.

We hear a voice on the speakers- “Ok guys, time to work, Danny do you want to try that song again? Keep Kayla there with you!! I think this may work now”

“Ok babe, I’m trying to record our song for the past 2 days but it doesn’t sound right”- De, explained to me.

“Where do you want me to stay?”- I asked whispering

“Just here on my arms where you belong!”- He answered pulling me to him.

“Are you ready Danny?”- Jezz asks on the speakers

De, puts some headphones on me, and holds to me, I start to hear the music on the headphones and then I hear his voice and I looked up to him, I love to hear him singing. When the music dies he comes down to me and gives me a kiss.

“That’s it, we got it, all in one, I knew this would work. All he needed was his girl!!”- Jezz is laughing.

“Kayla if it’s ok with you I would love to have you in the studio tomorrow?”

“Will we be alone tomorrow?”- De asked Jezz

“There’s some guys on studio 3 from 8am to 2pm but after that we’re by ourselves” – Jezz answered

“If she wants she can come after 2pm then! - De, says to Jezz “What you say babe?”-He asks me

“Sure I’ll go to MET in the morning, and will come to you after lunch!”

“Girl is you going to 5th avenue to go to MET?”- Asks Mika, looking at me like I’m an alien – “Do you know the kind of shops you can find there?”

“Not really my kind of thing”- I tell her with a smile

“Are you kidding, You don’t like shopping? I could understand that if you didn’t had that figure of yours, but with that body… come on!!”- She seems really amazed.

“It’s truth if I spend too much time in and out of shops I get really tired and grumpy.”- I try to explain to her- “I’ts my first time in New York and MET is one of the 4 museum in the world I want to go, so I’m taking the opportunity to do so.”- I tell her

“Where are the other 3?”- Jezz asks me with curiosity

“The British Museum in London, Louvre in Paris and Cairo Museum now only will only miss Cairo

“Keep that one Danny, she is smart, beautiful and don’t break your credit card”- William smiles at me.

“Do you have a sister? Better yet to you want to change I’m way sexier then Danny!”- Says Matthew with a sassy smile.

“You wish!”- De smiles at Matthew.

“You know what? I may.”- He smiles back.

“Ok, that’s it you can go home early today, don’t forget to say thanks to the pretty Scottish girl on your way out”- Jezz says giving me a blink.

We left the studio and went home, we order some chines food and had dinner all together talking about the news we all had, they from here and I and Liz from home.

After dinner I and De, went outside for a walk.

I have something I want to tell him and I would prefer to do it when we are alone.

“De, there’s any place we can talk?”- I ask

“What’s wrong babe?”- He looks worried

“Why it has to be something wrong, just want to talk to you, I have an answer to your proposition, that’s all!”- I smile.

“You do? Come lets seat on the pool house, we’ll be alone there!”- He holds my hand and rushes to the pool house, taking a seat for me.

“Ok babe don’t make me wait what did you decide?”- He is anxious.

“Before you leave I wasn’t sure what I was going to do, but 3 days without you and I had made my mind, I’ll take your offer. It’s the only way I can be free when you call, because you will be all over the country and with the time difference I know that we won’t be able to speak you Skype for days. That’s really hard for me” – I go to his lap – “De I miss you so, so much it even hurts, and we spoke every day and I kept myself as busy as I could, imagine if I couldn’t reach you for 2 our 3 days” – I’m trying really hard to keep the tears in my eyes from falling, but there’s no use they are out. - “I was going crazy without you, is like there’s some part of me that isn’t there”.

De, held me the closest he could –“ Sshhh, babe it’s ok you are here now, I know what you mean, why do you think everyone was so happy to see you? They were telling you the truth in this past few days I was all over the place, I couldn’t focus, I was overreacting on everything, and I was making their lives really difficult because I was felling miserable. I need you near me otherwise I lose all my focus.” – He tells me, massaging my lower back.

“K, babe, do you think we could find a way that you could come to me when you finish school? You would go back for your finals, and I’ll make sure you’ll have a good place to study.”

I looked him in his deep blue eyes and kissed those amazing lips, and then told him:

“I’ll be out of school on the 6 of June the finals will be from the 21st to the 25th of June, If I get in Coimbra it starts on the 6th of October.”

“That means you will come?”- He asks with hope on his voice.

“I’ll, of course I’ll, but how will we manage to do it?”- I asked him.

“Don't worry I already have thought about this, I never thought it would be possible but I was dreaming about it”- he looks like a kid in a candy store, he grabs my hand and we headed to the house.

Daniel

My girl just took a weight out of my shoulders I'll have her with me in my first tour solo, this make all the difference to me now I just have to figure out with the guys how to make this work but we have time for that, now I'm going to take care of my girl like she deserves.

I take her to our room and to the bathroom room, I seat her up on the counter and start the water for the jacuzzi, then I go to her and take all off her in as I look her from her head to her toes, I start by pulling her hair aside and kissing her neck then I give her soft kisses on the lips and suck on her lower lip, she lets a moan out and drops her head a little bit back, she's so f*****g sexy, doesn’t need to touch me to drive me crazy, I'm so f*****g aroused by now, I look K in her eyes and she's looking in my eyes I can see the desire in her and that that's me even higher, I start to take her shirt without taking my eyes out of her to make sure she doesn't want me to stop. Then I start a trail of kisses from her lips to her jaw, to her neck, while taking her bra out, she then pulls my shirt and I help her to get it out, the feeling of her shin against mine feels so good. I start to caress her breasts her belly and I fell her trembling under my touch and that sends sparks through my spine and gives an pleasure I never knew before, as if I could fell through her pleasure I'm giving her, I kiss her breasts, suck

gently and she pulls me in to her wrapping her legs around my waist and moving her hips in an increasingly rhythm, her eyes are on my and I can feel her building up for her o****m as her breathing increases her back arches and she moans in pleasure, and that's it for me I'm in total overload so once again I just come, just like that by making out with my baby girl and watching her come for me, I think I may have a problem here, I'm having the best s*x of my live without having s*x. I hold her really close and whisper on her ear- "Kayla I absolutely adore you babe" - and stay like that until her breathing start to calm down then I take her to the jacuzzi, take the rest if my clothes of and get in and start to give her a bath, from nowhere she asks

"What's on your mind?"

"Why would you say I have something in my mind?"

"Because you do, something that wasn't there before but I can feel it now, you are worried about something, spit it out !"

"Ok then, but this is embarrassing- I told her- I have been thinking ... It's the second time I come just by making up with you and watching you come, this is not normal, if we were having a regular s*x live I wouldn't be able to give you pleasure, I wouldn't stand a chance, I would come in less than 2 minutes "

She laughed and then looked at me "You guys are funny, you have lots of s*x but don't know s**t about it! You came because it's your brain that makes you come not your d**k !! The first time it happened I didn't know it either, but the way it happened got my attention so I decided to look in to it. You can come without anyone touching you; actually it happened to you before! "

"No, never before you!"

"Of course it did, you have wet dreams right?"

"Oh, that, but you don't image the things you have being doing to me on those

dreams babe!!" - I laughed at her

"Same think here, but you're awake and feeling me so even more intense I just

have to help getting some naughty images on your head, It probably won't work every time but at least this is the theory, I have being studying the matter and I'm now beginning the experiment phase, all for the best benefit of science. Maybe I even am going to make my theses out of this. " She laughed –“The level of intimacy and trust that we have in each other also helps for this to happen, the way you know how I'll react to your touch before you touch

Me, and specially this think that attracts us to each other and makes us feel incomplete when we aren't at each other’s reach, sometimes it sucks but when we get to be together is the best feeling on the world. "

She just resumed it all; I think I'll need a piece of paper and Maria.

"Babe would you be sad if I bring Maria to the room with us tonight" I asked her.

"Of course no, but you know I'll probably be asleep."

I helped her out the bath dried her and she went for one of my shirts while I put on a pair of sweet pants and went for Maria, when I come in just put K to bed and laid next to her with Maria, from experience I know she will not have any trouble to go to sleep while I and Maria are doing our our thing, she even looks quite pleased.