Peaks And Valleys

Phase 4

“MAY favoritism ka ba at iyang kabayo lang na ‘yan ang naisipan mong paliguan?”

Nakangiti kong pinadapuan ng tingin si Caliban habang kinukuskos ng may sabon si Marina. Iyong babaeng kabayo na maliit at mukhang maamo. I shook my head a little in response. Nakasandal ito sa mataas na bakod. Pinapanood ako sa bawat galaw ko. Ever since I told him I want to bath Marina, he’s been looking at me naughtily. Hindi ko alam kung gusto akong tuksuhin o ano.

“She’s the smallest, Caliban. Maliban sakanya’y nakakatakot na silang lahat.” Banayad na sagot ko.

I wasn’t lying. Sakanilang anim, Marina looks more behave. Parang hindi namimili ng amo. And even though I’m not knowledable enough about horses, nor have I been with one my entire life. I feel like she’s smiling everytime I touch her. Like she was very comfortable, with me.

Sa mga susunod na araw, paniguradong babalik ako rito. Not just to see Marina. Hindi para paliguan ito kung ‘di para matutong sumakay ng kabayo. Caliban told me he’ll teach me and I hold on to that. Gusto ko. I want to learn how to ride a horse. Gusto kong matutong sumakay at gusto kong gawin ang ginagawa ni Anton. Ang patakbuhin ang kabayo ayon sa bilis at direksyong gusto nito.

“Nababasa na ang damit mo,” sabi nito. Napapansin na yata ang talsik ng tubig at sabon sa damit ko. “Gusto mong bumalik ako para ikuha ka ng pamalit?”

I shook my head. “Hindi na, Caliban. Pagkatapos nito’y babalik na rin tayo. It’s late and I know you’re hungry.”

Anong oras na rin kasi. Kanina nga bago ko paliguan si Marina ay nag-aaya na sila Danilong kumain. I did not ask about the time but the sun’s position was enough to know that it was already afternoon. Late pa. Masyado akong naaaliw at pinagbibigyan naman iyon ni Caliban. Nang sabihin kong gusto kong paliguan ang mga kabayo kahit na papasyal at titingin lang sana kami ay pinagbigyan niya ako.

Naglakad ito kaya’t hindi ko nakita ang ekspresyon niya. I continued to wash Marina’s hair. Inaliw ko ang sarili roon. Ilang saglit lamang ng bumalik si Caliban hila-hila ang mahabng hose. He put the end of it beside me before he took his steps towards to his original position.

“Mahilig ka ba sa kabayo, Caliban?” tanong ko.

It was not a random question. Hindi rin tanong para alisin ang maaring pagkabagot na nararamdaman nito. I’m asking because I want to know. Does he like horses? What are his preferences? Kailan siya natutong sumakay ng kabayo at bakit parang gustong-gusto niya ang lugar na ito?

What does he like with this place and he settled here getting unpaid? I mean, I know the place was splendid. Na kakaiba ang pakiramdam na ibinibigay ng buong lugar pero bukod doon ay gusto ko pang malaman kung ano. What makes him go here, every year, spending his free time looking and working at the farm where he does not gain anything?

Gusto kong matukoy ang iniisip at nararamdaman nito sa tuwing nagtutungo siya sa lugar na ito taon-taon.

“You can say that,” he answered vaguely. “I don’t dislike horses. I’m very fond of riding one so you can pretty much say that I like them.”

“And the farm?” Binalingan ko siya ng tingin. “What makes you work here, unpaid?”

“I do get paid.” The corner of his lips rose up. “But not in money. I get to have the experience. The sights. The peacefulness. I have fallen in love with this place, Princess.”

Ipinilig ko ang ulo ko. “And it has never falter even a bit?”

“Has your passion about painting ever falter?” tanong niya pabalik sa akin. “We feel the same, Princess. Just towards different things.”

Matagal akong napatitig sakanya.

To have offer your life for something you truly want.

He was right. Growing up, I’d promise myself I’d hold nothing in the future but paintbrush and color palette. Despite not gaining anything but self pleasure and satisfactory, I settled with that because I truly have fallen in love with art. Ang pag-gawa ng sining. Ang pagpipinta. Ang mga kombinasyon ng kulay para mas lalong madepina ang emosyong gusto kong palitawin.

Isang maliit na ngiti ang sumilay sa mga labi ko nang matanto iyon. His counter was too accurate that it got me thinking. Perhaps we really are the same. May mga bagay o’ damdamin kaming pinaglilingkuran hindi dahil sa benepisyo kung hindi dahil sa sayang naibabalik noon.

On the other hand, happiness would also stand as its benefits. Katulad ng sinabi nito’y nababayaran siya noon, ngunit hindi pera.