The Voice
2108 Words
Lesson Twenty
The Voice
“Tss sino na naman ‘yan?”
- Prince Randall –
Nangunot ang noo niyang bumaling sa’kin. “Tangna mu ano na namang problema mo?” -____-
Mura ng mura, prinsesa ba talaga ‘to? =____=
“Tsk, wala. Gawin mo ulit.”
“Na naman? Perfect ko na kanina ah.”
“Gawin mo nga ulit, kailangan mong masanay.”
Bumuntong hininga siya at ngumiti ulit. Saka siya nag-curtsy. Kamalasan niyang namilipit yung isa niyang paa du’n sa naka-twist niyang leg kaya muntik siyang matumba. Muntik kung hindi ko nasalo.
“Sabi ko naman sa’yo mahirap ‘tong curtsy na ganto eeeh.” TT0TT
“Para sa’n pa lahat ng pinaghirapan mo kung sa curtsey lang suko ka na?” binitawan ko siya at hinayaang makatayo. “Gawin mo ulit. Sampung beses hanggang sa masanay ka.”
“Tokwa.” -____-
“Oo mamaya pakakainin kita ng tokwa, sasamahan ko pa ng BABOY kaya bilisan mo.”
“Baboy baboy baboy baboy baboy baboy HAHAHAHAHAHA!” :D
Hindi pa rin nagbabago. -____-
Ilang ulit siyang nag-curtsy. Ayoko sanang nahihirapan siya dahil sa kahit na anong mangyari, Avrona pa rin niya ako. We’re linked. The silver cord that connects us can never be broken. Our lives are linked. We can’t escape each other any more than we can escape fate. At sa bawat hirap niya, doble ang impact sa’kin.
It is how the stuff goes.
“Randall, ikaw na ba ‘yan? Kamusta ang prinsesa? Madali ba siyang turuan?” nakangiting bungad ni Ima sa akin nang marating ko ang silid ko sa Atlaniyo.
“Nahirapan siya ng konti. Pero maayos naman.”
“Mm. Sige at magpahinga ka na.”
“Ma?”
Lumingon siya at hinarap ako. “Bakit? May kailangan ka pa?”
“Bakit… bakit bawal mahalin si Xanara, Ma? Bakit hindi ko siya pwedeng mahalin? Bakit bawal na maging kami?”
“Randall…” her tone sounded with worry and warning.
Hindi ko alam kung anong saysay ng patakarang ‘yon. Tapat ako kay Xanara, hindi ko siya kahit kailan gagawan ng masama. Hindi ko alam kung bakit. Alam nilang lahat na matagal ko na siyang mahal. Pero bakit hindi pwede? Wala bang exception sa rules?
“Kapag bumagsak ang prinsesa, ikaw ang sisisihin nilang lahat. Sa puntong nagmamahalan na kayo ng mahal na prinsesa, ikaw ang magiging kahinaan niya, Randall. Sa’yo siya susuko. Sa’yo mapupunta ang lakas at kahinaan niya. Sa’yo lahat ng tiwala niya. At hindi maaaring mangyari dahil nakatakda niyang ialay sa Euenessia ang lahat ng ‘yon.”
“Hindi ba parang… ang lupit-lupit no’n? Hindi patas ‘yon, Ma. Pa’no kung gusto niyang magmahal? Pa’no kung gusto niyang ibigay ang tiwala niya sa isang tao? Pa’no kung gusto niyang—”
“Randall, kahit na ano pang sabihin mo ngayon, mananatiling bawal ang pag-ibig sa prinsesa. Sumunod ka sa batas. Mapapahamak ka kapag nilabag mo ‘yon.”
Mapapahamak? What more wouldn’t I do for Xanara? Nothing. I did everything, I am willing and ready for more.
Everything… even the most insane stuff I will do. Sabihin lang niya. Gagawin ko kahit ano pa ‘yon.
***
“What’s bothering you?” napansin ko siyang nakatingin lang ng diretso sa lawa ng Abrasia at nag-iisip. She’s spacing out at kanina pa ‘yan. Di ko rin naman alam ang gagawin ko.
“Kailan kaya ako makakabalik, Randall? Kailan ko kaya siya makikita?”
My heart sank down at the mention of that guy. Zero Schneider. Why the hell do I always have to hear her saying a vampire is bothering her? Can’t she just focus all her attention at me?
“Oy, Randall, you’re spacing out.”
“Tss.”
“Wushuuuuu nagseselos ka noh? Mwahahahaha nagseselos si Randall!” xD
Ginawa pang katatawanan. -___-
“Bawal ‘yun.”
Nawala ang ngiti niya and she looks at me with sympathy. “Lagi ka na lang bang susunod sa mga bawal, Randall? Don’t you want to break free from those rules? Maraming pwedeng gawin para ma-solve ‘yang rules na ‘yan. Kapag naging prinsesa na’ko aalisin ko ‘yang mga ganyang batas.”
If she only knew… malaking batas na ang sinuway ko nang dahil sa pagmamahal sa kanya. And she doesn’t even care about that.
“Mahal mo siya?”
“Huh?”
“Zero Schneider.”
“Ah.” Bumaling siya sa lawa at ngumiti. “There’s something about him that pulls me to like him. Na parang konektado kami. There’s this… unfamilliar feeling na parang mahal na mahal ko siya at hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit.”
“You said he’s a reincarnation right? Baka dahil do’n.”
She sighed. “Matagal na ‘yon. Putol na ang nag-uugnay sa amin simula nang maipanganak akong prinsesa. Putol na ang ugnayan namin simula nang matanggal ang sumpang pumipigil sa kapangyarihan ko. And therefore, wala na rin dapat siya. At hindi ako dapat nakakaramdam ng ganito. Not unless… something weird is happening… again.”
Humiga ako sa damuhan at tumingin sa kanya. “Di ka ba naiilang na sabihin ‘yan sa’kin?”
“Ba’t ako maiilang eh ikaw lang naman ‘yan.” :P
“H’wag mong isiping ako lang ‘to. Dahil kaya kong ibaon sa limot ang lahat-lahat ng makakapagpa-alala sa kanya sa’yo.”
Matagal siyang natigilan. Maya-maya ay ngumiti at nag-iwas ng tingin. “Talaga? I dare you, Randall.”
++++
One year. Three months. Twenty days. Five minutes. Three hundred sixty five seconds. That’s how long you were gone, Xanara. Hindi ko alam kung kaya ko pa. Masisiraan na ako ng ulo. Tulungan mo’kong kayanin ang lahat ng ‘to. Help me cope up to a world without any of your memories.
“Guys, look! May nabili ako sa music world nung nakalusot ako sa portal. I think bago siyang album tsaka bagong banda. Patugtugin natin. Nagdala ako ng portable player.”
I laid down on the ground inside the tent and listened intently to their blabs. They don’t seem to be that devastated as before. At least, they weren’t like me.
“Anong pangalan nung banda? Ang bongga naman ng cover, talagang itim na bulaklak eh noh?”
“Melancholy yung band. Di ko nakita kanina yung poster pero nasilip ko yung picture nung lalaking bassist. Ay tae ang wafu.”
“Landeeee. Oh i-play na ‘yan dali.”
Remember, Xanara? You told me before that if I messed up I’ll kill myself and if you lose, then you’ll marry me? You made a deal right?
♪♫Once upon a time,
I believe it was a Tuesday when I caught your eye
And we caught onto something, I hold onto the night
You looked me in the eye and told me you love me♪♫
Your memories created a paradise inside my mind. A paradise where you live and breathe. A paradise where you laugh and sing. A paradise where you love me. A paradise that I hold on to keep going. A paradise…
…outside the hell.
♪♫Were you just kidding cause it seems to me
This thing is breaking down, we almost never speak
I don’t feel welcome anymore
Baby what happened? Please tell me
Cause one second it was perfect
Now you’re half way out the door♪♫
I gave way for him. I thought you really love him. Para sa’yo bumitaw ako. Akala ko masaya ka du’n. Bakit hindi mo sinabi? Bakit ka nagsinungaling sa’kin? Bakit lagi mong sinasabing okay ka sa isang bagay na hindi naman? Why do you always step out of your comfort zone for others? Why, Xanara?
♪♫And I stare at the phone he still hasn’t called
And then you feel so low, you can’t feel nothing at all
And you flashback to when he said ‘Forever And Always’♪♫
I hate you because you cannot love me the way I love you. I hate you because you keep hurting me. I hate you. How I wish I can hate you much more than I love you all my life, Xanara.
♪♫Oh and it rains in your bedroom, everything was wrong
It rains when you’re here and it rains when you’re gone
I was there when you said ‘Forever And Always’♪♫
This hands… this hands have hurt you bad enough and now you’re gone. This is a stuff that I used to kill you. Xanara… Xanara, what did I do?
♪♫Was I out of line?
Did I say something way too honest that made you run and hide?
Like a scared little boy, I looked into your eyes
Thought I knew you for a minute now I’m not so sure♪♫
I lost you because I was too faithful. I lost you and I lost myself. I lost everything. Why did you, Xanara? Why can’t you hold on? Was I that hard to get along for you to leave me hanging out here? I lost you. I lost that one thing that keeps me from dying every single day.
♪♫So here’s to everything, coming down to nothing
Here’s to silence that cuts me to the core
Where is this going?
Thought I knew you for a minute but I don’t anymore♪♫
“That voice…”
I… I knew I did it. I…
♪♫Oh and it rains in your bedroom, everything was wrong
It rains when you’re here and it rains when you’re gone
I was there when you said ‘Forever And Always’
You didn’t mean it baby. I don’t think so. ♪♫
…killed her.
“Why? What’s with the voice, Div?”
“I don’t know. The voice sounds so familliar.”
Xanara, I’m waiting.
“AHHHHHHH!”
They all barged in when they heard my frustrated scream. Their face looks at me with a disgusted stance that I can’t look at them anymore. They are blaming me. They don’t like me alive. They want me gone like you, Xanara.
“Randall, what’s the problem? Stop crying, what’s the problem?”
♪♫Back up, baby back up.
Did you forget everything?
Back up, baby back up
Did you forget everything? ♪♫
I see it clearly how you looked at me and asked. How you looked at me with confusion and pain.
“AHHHHHHH!”
How your eyes didn’t wanna believe it was me.
“Randall, ano ba! Pinakakaba mo kaming lahat! Ano bang problema mo? Magsalita ka nga! Ano bang nangyayari?”
It was me, Xanara. It was me. I don’t regret killing you yet it pains me. I don’t regret hurting you yet it kills me. I don’t regret everything yet I feel I have nothing. I don’t regret… yet I can’t forget.
♪♫And it rains in your bedroom, everything was wrong
It rains when you’re here and it rains when you’re gone
I was there when you said ‘Forever And Always’♪♫
The song would be lot more real if you sing it, Xanara. It must be good when it’s your voice. I wish it was your voice. I would’ve loved it.
♪♫You didn’t mean it baby
You said ‘Forever And Always’♪♫
“Randall?”
“Mm.”
“Takot ako sa dilim. H’wag mo na’ko ulit iiwan ah. Dapat hanggang sa lumaki tayo, ikaw pa rin ang kasama ko kapag natutulog ako sa madilim na kwarto. Dapat ikaw pa rin ang kasama ko. Di mo’ko pwedeng iwan.”
“Yes, Xanara. I won’t leave you. I’ll always be here.”
“Forever and always?”
“Forever and always.”
- Writer
