&t (Rafe )
1040 Words
Have you ever felt like dying quitting life just losing ever thing and don't look back at it just walking past everything good and bad just closing your eyes and never open them just drone in my thoughts and kill everyone's that bothers me I just want to fly want to walk off the cliff open My Wings and fly but I am not a bird and neither a killer.
I looked at the sky from the window that I was sitting at '- I feel so empty -' I said to myself before I closed my eyes and jumped out of the window '- god next time I jump out of the window I should put some pillows -' I said to my self rubing my ass '- to much for running away from this hell will if I am correct i am not running away from it I just want to take a break from all this drama hah they call me drama queen don't they look at what they are living they are jockes what the f**k do they expect -' I thought as I walked the midnight streets ugh I always walked this street in midnight but it never got this quote maybe because I never walked alone here I smiled at the stupid bad memoirs of Mia and me roaming the streets usual she is drunk I don't know what to call these memoirs I don't know how the f**k I used to be her friend and out of all people she is the one who mad me HATE myself she would tell me every night she got drunk that she only befriended me because she liked my brothers and every time she would say that I only thought it was the dunk talk but it seemed other than that .
I kicked a rock as I walked in the forest i know deep in the forest there's a lake that uncle cj and his lover lin , cj is actual name is Kevin he has with his lover an open relationship with his friends yeah weird but I love them they actual were good friends with mom , I paused at the thought of her and then continued my walking through the deep forest to find the quite lake, '- uh mom it's been a long time since I visited you ...... I missed you so much -' I felt tears coming out of my eyes as i continued my walk through the forest but then I final saw it but immediately noticed that I had company I noticed a boy standing at the edge of the lake he was smoking, what should I do i those to my self should I acknowledge him or ignor him you know what f**k it
" uhm" i ( AN : he did something as I said I am stupid you don't have to point that I am stupid)
" OH JESUS CHRIST " he freaked out and dropped his cigar
" did no one Teach you to knock " he said as he put his hand on his Hart I noticed that the boy was familiar and was wearing make up
I sarcastically knocked at the tree next to me he , looked at me like I am stupid but then I noticed him he was Sam Houston Emmas ex " you know what I the stupid one for saying that " he said put his hand in bucket and getting his back of cigarettes and got a cigar out and lighted it .
" aren'tyou Sam Houston " I said walking closer to him " look I don't care if you told everyonethat I am gay I am coming out at the beginning of the year so f**k of " I smiled and stood next to him
" I wish I had the chance to come out not a friend rat me out " Sam actual one of the people who always defined me and I bet you guessed the one who rated me out Mia ding ding I actually told her I had a crush on a boy who's called Leo wish is her boyfriend who she ran away with .
He looked at me for a second and noticed who I was and smiled " aren't you a strong fellow ay Rafe Allen " he said taking a Swift out of his cigar I just nodded and sat on the ground and he did the same " so how is your popularity going " I asked as i throw a Rock in the lake
" it's bad I just want to go back where we were friends " he said clutching his hand through his hair
" I don't think we could get back because I lost you for popularity " I said throwing another another rock
" are the rumors right " he said kind yelling but not Loud
" what rumors there's a lot of rumors about me " I said yeah one day in these four months I got absent and there was a rumor saying that I did it and killed my self
" that you cut " he said looking at me with concern in his eyes I just looked at him and gave him a wake smile " what do you expect from a person that one of his friends left him for popularity and his other friend who was a f*****g b***h didn't care about any of my feelings , and guess what happened to me at the day she left " I said while crying .
" I got r***d and I asked for her help but she told me I was f*****g lying and turned her back for me and left telling me that we are no longer friends she told me it was my fault " I said crying more and more but then I felt some one hugging me .
" who did it " he asked
" Mr. Huston " u said in low voice I need this out of my chest I huged him back and he hugged me tighter .
Sam Houston: age 15 one of Rafe old friends
- Writer
