That Four Letter Word

You know what's a load of bullshit? Love. That four-letter word that everyone seems to gravitate toward. They love this thin material blouse, probably threaded beautifully by a 12-year-old in Asia, making a few cents to feed their family. They love the weather even though global warming is still a thing, and animals are slowly but surely dying because of the way humans have been oh-so eco-friendly. They love their boyfriend/girlfriend/significant other/sneaky link even though they question every little interaction or message the other sends to decipher whether or not their intentions are true. Love. Honestly, at the ripe age of 27, I didn't believe in love anymore. Being a hard-working woman with ambitions and goals is all that matters. Working my way up the chain of retail just to be told being a*****e Manager of this city's cosmetic store is all you are good for, and possible opportunities will come as a District Manager. "You're young. You have so much to learn." So much to learn even though Craig, who is 4 years over me and is my District Manager, tries to micromanage my every living action. Craig, who always asks me if we have any launches coming soon. Craig, who makes me train all the incoming managers in my district. Craig. I am the complete opposite of loving Craig. My job, though? I adore it. Makeup and art have always been my hobbies that I felt such a tug toward. The creativity and self-expression to be who I always wanted to be. Honestly, I never wore much makeup growing up, but with the rise in social media and the self-help trends, I realized it was a passion. Hours and hours watching famous youtubers dabble in some brands and creating unique looks made me realize how much fun that would be. Once I picked up that makeup brush, it was all up from there. Now, that's enough about working, back to that four-letter word that is vomited out in most of my day-to-day life. I once thought I was in love... but it was all just my imagination as an adolescent youth who never really understood the world or people's real intentions. See most of these romance novels start with a girl from a small town who was shy and a nerd and falls for the bad boys... This is NOT that story. I'm Maeve Caro. I grew up on the coast of Mississippi. I know gross, but it's not that honkytonk, missing teeth type southern state. Biloxi is honestly quite beautiful and a huge tourist attraction most of the time. See, we live smack dab on the beach where the muddy Gulf waters wade onto our sandy beach. It's known to be home to the "world's largest man-made beach with 26 miles of glistening white sand, majestic sand dunes, and a pedestrian pathway," as Google so beautifully described. It's beautiful, but I wouldn't step foot into the muddy water not since the BP Oil Spill in 2010. I was at the end of my eighth grade year when it happened. *** April 2020 "Maeve! Maeve! Oh my god, did you see WLOX this morning? s**t is wild! Honestly, I can't imagine being on an oil rig, and it blew up." I stop my slow pacing in the courtyard as I hear the voice of a wonderfully loud ginger at 7:30 in the morning. "Connor... it's 7 in the morning." My non-caffeinated bitchiness obvious on my adolescent face. My badly bleached highlighted curly hair was tucked behind my ear with a bobbi pin and BMS sweatshirt two sizes too big swallowing my awkward curvy teen figure. "Well miss grumpy grouch, I was just trying to ask since you are such an animal and nature advocate if you saw the news about the oil spill," he turned his face up in a pout as we headed to our red bench waiting for the rest of our little crew to show up. I did see the news, which is what kept me up all night. Eleven workers were killed, and seventeen were injured after an oil rig blew up and burned. The spill could cause a large catastrophic outcome for all of the marine animals and marshlands. Growing up on the coast, I grew a love for the nature around us; my love for animals is also what has me known here at my middle school since I'm always volunteering at the Humane Society and sketching animals in my journals. "Yeah, I did," I muttered lowly before bouncing my head repeatedly on the grated bench table. "It's going to be horrible, Connor! The amount of sea life that will be dead because of this is crazy. These big rig companies have no real care about nature." I looked up wide-eyed as he looked back sympathetically. "I'm going to see if I can go volunteer at IMMS. They need all hands on deck right?" "I mean yeah it'll help, but you're only in middle school Maeve. There isn't much a 14-year-old girl can do, right?" His hand rubbed the back of his neck before playing with the thin strands at the back of his neck. Connor had this whole Paul Walker haircut that did his face no justice. His face was rounder and splattered with these cute little freckles. He was on the heftier side, but in my opinion, it looked really good on him. I used to have a huge crush on him in sixth grade until I realized he was kinda stupid in a way I need as a friend. He was the Will Ferrel to my Mark Wahlberg. "HEY! I am VERY capable at fourteen-" I felt a smack on the back of my neck before hearing the annoying scream "NECK!" I hung my head low before spiraling around and pulling my beautiful bestie onto my lap. "b***h I will end you!" I gripped her as we both giggled loudly. Our voices echoed in the courtyard causing a few heads to turn our way. "What happened to 'It's seven in the morning?'" Connor raised his eyebrow at me while giving me a judging look. "Oh hush! I can't help but be loud with this woman", I said releasing Jo from my hold. Josephine 'Jo' Miller is by far my best friend. We've known each other since elementary school when she moved here from New Jersey. We both tend to bring out the weird in one another. If Jo is around then Maeve isn't far away. We were always stuck like glue. Honestly I felt she was the sun in the relationship always bring this ray of light to brighten everyone's day. She was friendly and had this confidence that everything will be alright. I, on the other hand, was like the moon. I had my phases on when I'd like to be front and center but most of the time I like to stay away in the background watching the others grow. I wasn't insecure or anything. Well I was for a teenager about basic stuff, but I wasn't as social as Jo. I loved listening to conversations and observing people's expressions. My tight group of friends were some of the only people that have seen me come out of my shell. "Well, you should really shut up," a deep voice came from diagonally behind me. My eyes rolled as I turned with a sarcastic smile. "Apologies, my lord. A lowly scullery maid like myself should never speak in the presence of our dark king," I said in an English accent with a sneer looking back at nonother than the one person who made my youth a mess. Oakley Kent. *** "Hey, Maeve... there is a real Karen up in the front, angry her expired coupon won't work..." Stephanie stated, peeking her head through my office doorway. My eyes shifted from her to the keyboard my fingers were hovering above. Why was I always having my mind reeling back to the past? I pushed my chair back with my hands on the desk before making my way up to the front register. "-And the coupon was sent LATE! That is not my fault! This is absurd. Who does this? Who sends these out? I should be getting an extra percentage for this hassle!" A shorter woman with the bob haircut was pointing a finger at my other associate Aisha. When I came into view, 'Karen' pouted and looked at the manager badge pinned to my black dress. My edgy fashion sense was always questionable in this small town. Southern women always judge if they see a tight dress, fishnets, and heeled boots with 'spooky' accessories. "Hi, ma'am. I'm the manager. What seems to be the problem?" I look down at the coupon Aisha slipped into my fingers before walking back to the aisles to work on stocking the shelves. "My coupon was sent late. I want to use it since it is the company's fault." She stuck her nose in the air showing the many layers of what wrinkle prevention skincare could have fixed. My eyes shifted down to the paper in my hand as I read the expiration date from 8 months ago. My eyes shifted to her face with the look every Karen knows they are caught with. "Look I'll give you the discount, but next time you come in with an expired coupon you will be turned away. This is from eight months ago and they send everything through email now. Also, never point your fingers at my associates again." I looked at her as I continued to punch in her purchase and discount. "Cash or Card?" "DAMN Maeve! You're the coolest boss ever!" Steph and Aisha kept giggling about what happened as they put stock out. I smiled at them feeling a warm feeling in my chest. "Thanks, guys, but I want y'all to feel respected here. I am your boss, but you are my equals. You deserve human decency." I counted the drawers as we were getting ready to close. *bzzz* I pulled my phone out of my cardigan looking down at the name in bold. "What it do, Hoe? Oops, I mean Jo!" I answered with a smile as I was locking the doors. The girl began walking to their cars as I tugged the door to make sure it was secure. "Hardy Har Har! You, me, the gang, and Axe throwing! Don't say no or I'll key your car," her sweet voice persuading me for a night I really don't want. "Fine, but I'm not drinking..." *** Well that was a lie. Four drinks in, and I'm chucking an axe at a target board in our new hangout. My axe landed straight in the middle as I was thinking of all the rude Karen's I have to deal with on a day to day basis, and I could hear the cheers from behind. "Remind me not to get on your bad side Maeve", Lewis our beautiful chocolate god, said, sipping on a PBR staring at where my axe landed. His beautiful girlfriend giggled up at him tipsy as can be before looking toward me. Lewis is a local police officer for Gulfport, and Trish is a CPS worker, which is how they found each other. Trish was by far one of the prettiest girls Lewis has been with, and she is able to put up with cocky attitude. "If you ever break my heart, Maeve here will come to throw an axe at you," Trish smiled innocently back up at him. Lewis cleared his throat and looked away toward the bar. "Maeve ain't gonna do s**t!" Connor said, who now rocked a buzzed cut. He shed all that teenage weight and is a 'fitness bro', but he still has a good personality. His i********: is full of mirror pics at the gym with a fitness quote as his caption. He works in accounting after graduating from Ole Miss because his daddy was an alumni there. "Yeah, keep saying that, Connor... Maeve has slapped your more times than anyone of us here, "Jo said, passing me another Jell-O shot before shrugging her jacket down. "Yeah, watch it, Connor," I winked at him before slurping my blue raspberry flavored shot. "Man, I said I don't wanna drink, but here I am buzzed and letting all my pent-up rage out in an axe-throwing bar." My friends laughed before hearing the clack of heels against the wood floor of the bar. "Connor, my love!" We turned seeing Abigail throw her arms around his neck and give him an exaggerated kiss on the lips. Abigail and Connor met at Ole Miss their sophomore year, and the quote fell in love unquote. She is a pharmacist in a town called Ocean Springs at her family-owned drugstore. Her red hair matched with his perfectly, and I was secretly hoping to see redheaded babies soon. I fake gagged as I picked up my Long Island and began sipping. Jo giggled before scanning the bar. "I wanna get laid tonight... What about short Chris Hemsworth over there?" I eyed the direction she nodded toward and almost spit out my drink. "He looks like that crazy train frog! Don't you dare!" Jo laughed next to me before looking at a group of guys dressed in Hurley and RVCA. "Tall blonde over there is cute," She waved her fingers toward the guy who was gawking at her. See Jo has always been blessed with a chest and long dirty blonde hair. She's gorgeous, but she doesn't flaunt it. You'll catch her in big-ass hoodies and basketball shorts rather than tonight's attire of a baby blue cropped shirt, her mom jeans, and pumas. "He looks like he just turned 20," I muttered, chugging the rest of my drink. "He's legal, and younger guys have more stamina sometimes. He looks like an Air Force boy." She stood tall before strutting around the table heading toward her prey for the night. "He is definitely a Keesler kid," I commented to no one in particular. I head to the bar, waving down the bartender and requesting a whiskey sour. A loud Connor decided to make the dreaded announcement for the whole bar to hear, "Oakley! Man, you came!" Without turning around, my lips turned into a frown, and my shoulders tensed up. I looked down at my black tee and leather skirt that I wore. Im so glad I wore my Dr. Martens because maybe I can make my escape. "Glad to be here. It's been a while... Maeve," his rich deep voice saying my name made me feel like I was back in high school all over again. I turned around to see Oakley not as some awkward teenage brute but as a man. His arms cascaded with a patchwork sleeve and a short sleeve black button-up over dark washed jeans. His lips had a smirk, and his eyes still showed mischief. His hair was what Connor always wanted it to be in high school, but where Connor's was copper, Oakley's hair was as dark as my favorite black liner from KVD. "f**k off," I said glaring at him before taking my drink and heading toward the group of Keesler kids and Jo. He can't just strut yo in here thinking everything was okay. He always liked messing with me in the past, and I just know that's exactly what he's trying to do. We were possibly friends at one point, but then graduation happened. "She definitely still hates me," Oakley turned to look at Connor. He let out a sigh before turning to two figures shadowing him. "This is Lyric and Tucker. Lyric is our beautiful bassist, and Tucker is the lead guitarist and vocals." "So you're still doing the band thing?" Lewis looked over questionably. Oakley let out an agitated breath through his nose as his eyes landed on Lewis. "No judgment, man. Just you moved to New Orleans, and we haven't heard much from you, but you are still doing the rock thing. It's cool, man." "I work in construction mostly in Metairie, but I do the music thing at night. We actually play a few gigs here and there at the House of Blues and a couple bars." Oakley stated defensively. "A few gigs really?" Jo said tugging the boring Air Force kid with her whose name is Brian. Brian... gag... I looked up at Oakley and his bandmates now sipping my drink curious to hear more. His eyes found mine for a split second before landing on Jo. "Yeah really. If we weren't getting gigs I wouldn't stay in NOLA." "Seeing as it's the murder capital..." I muttered looking at a couple throwing axes as a competition that will probably end with them kissing and going home to 'make love'. "It's not that bad and last I saw you party on Bourbon quite a lot," He raised his eyebrow at me with a glare. "Okay Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson, first of all, I haven't been to the city in like a year. Second, Bourbon was to celebrate Jo turning 25. Third, are you stalking me on f*******: or something?" I placed my drink down crossing my arms as I stuck my neck out because attitude is what Maeve Caro is known for in our little crew. His lips turned up softly before his hands gripped the sides of our small circular table before leaning over it closer toward my face. I can see the shirt struggling against the definition of his arms as his grip was tight against the wood. I couldn't help swallow at the sight before my eyes made contact with his. "And if I do?" "Gross..."