Desire

People have their own definitions of the life they are leading. Some people try to have something more than their own definition, while some live on the edge trying to achieve the least amount. But how can someone think of another person's definition as theirs? What is the ethic behind it? What is the ideology behind it? More than anything, is it acceptable? Give a rest to my answer, but what is your answer to this? With the sound of birds chirping, with the smallest sunlight reaching his face through the window, he asked himself whether he really wanted to get up or not. Actually, he never wanted to get up. From his real inner thoughts and feelings he never wanted this. But are there any other options left? Actually, his mind had been awake for a long time ago, but he did not want to send nerve signals to his eyelids to open them up. Was it because he was too lazy? No absolutely not, but at the same time, yes, he was lazy. It is hard to say whether his eyelids were too heavy or whether the process was really hard to complete. Was it because of the nagging of his mom starting from the very beginning? Or was it because he did not want to wake up to the same world that he saw yesterday? Was it pathetic to think like that? Yes, it's horrible to think like that. At the same time, if I was in his shoes, what would I have done? No one can give a definition to another one's life as we are in their shoes. At the same time, we can try to put on their shoes and try to measure and compare the size. Finally, he opened his eyelids and looked at the world he was in yesterday as well, with a boring smile. He was unhappy because it was happening again as usual, but he never wanted to change it, and he never wanted to see an alteration. While he was getting out of bed, he wanted to greet his father, who was ironing clothes, but he asked himself, "Do I really have to say that? Is it required? What will he think if I suddenly say it? It is not something that I normally do. It will definitely cause a weird situation." All these questions went through his mind within a few seconds. He said nothing to anyone, not only to his father but also to his mother. Was it because of a quarrel between them? No, nothing happened yesterday. Not only yesterday, the day before yesterday, the previous week, the previous month, and the previous year was the same for him. While going to the bathroom, he took a slight glance at the clock, not because he had to be on time for something, just because he wanted to give himself a compliment that, "you are using your time wisely". After using the washroom, he looked at the same boring face which he looked at through the mirror yesterday. He washed his face and brushed his teeth like it was something really important in day-to-day life. Was it? No, it was just because he had nothing better to do. For him, the washroom was a special place where he could be true to himself. He never cheated on him in this place. It was not because he was a person who sings in the washroom while doing his business. It was not because he had a huge, luxurious place as a washroom that he could stay even for a day. It was just because he could talk to himself freely in this small space, which is covered by only three tiny walls and one door. Was it not enough for him? No, he was more than satisfied with what he got. All he wanted was a minute in peace. He called himself for a moment and asked, "Is there anything special today? Did I forget something? No, right." With the self-confirmation, he came out of the washroom and went upstairs. He thought about what he wanted to do today and went to switch on the router. Wi-Fi was everything for him when he stayed at home. He did not use Wi-Fi for an abnormal purpose, but isn't it abnormal to switch on the router as soon as someone wakes up? He scrolled through w******p after getting the mobile phone. " Has someone messaged me? I know no one misses me even a bit. But, isn't there anyone who can give up a millisecond to ask whether I am doing well or not? How many times have I asked these people about their well-being? Now, I am feeling worthless that I wasted my time asking whether they are doing well. Really pathetic!!!... " In this day and era, isn't it disappointing to wait for someone's care and love through w******p? Is he drunk or something? Someone might say maybe he is going through a hard time or a break-up or something. But he didn't waste his time saying "Good morning" to his own parents. He wanted someone to greet him but not his parents or family. He wanted to greet someone but not his family. Is he going through puberty or something? Why is this person like that? What kind of drifter is he? He looks like that and he works like that. Is he really a pushover and a stubborn brat to live like that? Or is he a prodigal child who was born as a scar to his family? Does he care about his family at least even a bit? Suddenly, his mom asked him to come downstairs and help in the kitchen. As soon as he heard his mom, he stood up from the chair as a reflex. Was it because his mom was hot-tempered or was it due to the uttermost respect not only in his mind but also in his whole blood, tissues and organs? All the organs react at the same time to his mother's call. Is this not abnormal? But for your least concern, his mother had never slapped him even once. Then this body reflex might be due to the respect arising from the bottom of his heart. Let's guess like that for now. He helped his mom in the kitchen and went back to his favorite seat in front of his laptop. He longed to be drawn into his own world, while watching some online reels and to have some fun watching what he wanted for a while. Wasn't he too selfish, when his mom and father worked hard to leave the house early to reach their workplaces? Actually, he felt guilty and went to offer some help to them. After doing some chores, he thought that this was the limit and this much should be fine. But you can't determine the limit when you are offering help in this household. It is the receiver who determines the limit as they please. "No hard feelings. It should be okay. I must do everything I can. Otherwise, I will become a useless brat, who never listens to anyone." As always, he thought to himself. Time flew away, and both parents left home for their jobs. He took a rest in a chair for a while and went into his own inner world with the flow. He never wanted to be alone in the house at the same time, he wanted to have a quiet, pleasant environment without anyone. He always dealt with these clearly opposite polars in his mind. He always wanted to dwell in between them while never wanting to choose one edge. He started to concentrate on a book that he had to finish by this week, but it was the most useless activity of the day, since he kept his phone in his hand the whole time. He highlighted the whole book, as he read it from the surface of his mind. But his inner mindset and hippocampus did not even know the fact that he read a book. While all this was happening but nothing was actually happening, there was a sudden knock on the door. It was weird and mysterious for someone to come to his house at this time. He wanted to let go of this incident, thinking this might be a mistake. Unexpectedly, this time, the knock made him utterly flabbergasted by the faceless sound. "Nick, please open the door. I know you are there."