Steel Hearts

Chapter 5

Chapter 5 - No Man is An Army

Sabi ng iba, ang pagiging sundalo ay hindi bagay sa isang babaeng gaya ko. Matangkad nga pero payat at manipis naman ang katawan. Mukha tuloy laging lampa sa laban at pipichugi lamang. Pero ang magsasabi lang noon ay ang mga taong hindi lubusang nakakakilala at nakakita sa aking kakayahan.

I got to thank General Claridades for seeing my potential. Kasi ako, hindi ko rin iyon makita noong simula. Ang alam ko lang, gusto kong tumulong. Gusto kong abutin ang kamay ng mga taong hindi kayang lumakad pa. Gusto kong buhatin sila at dugtungan ang buhay nila kahit pa kapalit ito ng buhay ko. Gusto ko protektahan ang sangkatauhan, pero hindi ko isasantabi ang pagiging makatao.

I applied for Philippine Military Academy because I was dead sure it is my line of purpose in life. Being a soldier is my purpose. Like Tatay.

The first application of mine was declined because I was an underage applicant. Even if I passed the examination, we have been listed as least priority. For short, I did not make it.

But then I took the exams again. Proceeded to the Complete Physical Exam and did all the other tests necessary. Naipasa ko naman lahat. But still, my second application was also another rejection. Because I ran short for the quota.

I heard lots of discouragement. Especially from people around me. Matalino raw nga ako, Salutatorian noong Highschool at Valedictorian noong Elementary pero sa PMA ay hindi raw ako makapasa. Akala kasi ng iba, kapag pumasa ka ay ganoon lang kadali lahat. Na kapag pumasa ka, ay tuloy tuloy ka na.

Turns out? Hindi.

Sa unang phase pa lamang, ang PMA Entrance Exam Written type, kakalabanin mo na ang humigit kumulang 30,000 applicants sa buong bansa para sa kakarampot na 1,500 slots. Imagine the grueling battle against Valedictorians and Laudes all over the Philippines.

Kung maipasa mo iyon, swerte mo at makakaproceed ka sa susunod na phase --- ang CPE. Kung sinala kayo sa entrance exam, dadaan naman kayo sa butas ng butas ng butas ng karayom sa CPE. Dahil mula sa 1,500 slots, ay 400 na lamang ang kukuhaning quota para maging mga kadete. Ang mas masakit at masaklap roon, sa 1,500 na written exam passers ay may 400 na babae. At sa 400 na babae, 50 or less lamang ang kukuhaning quota.

Ang dali hindi ba? Note my sarcasm.

Pero matigas ang ulo ko. At kahit pa dalawang beses na akong nalugmok ay lumaban pa rin ako para sa pangarap kong maging sundalo.

On my third try, I got the luck of finally being a cadet.

Syempre, hindi naman naging madali ang lahat porket nakapasok ka na. Sa loob ng PMA, ay mga kwentong hindi mo malalaman hangga't hindi mo napapasok at nararanasan. Mga kwentong tanging kami at kami lang ang nakakaalam. Mga bagay na hindi namin maibabahagi sa iba dahil ito ang aming espesyal na koneksyon bilang bagong pamilya.

I graduated Valedictorian of my class and was hailed as the first female Deputy Brigade Commander --- ang second in command sa Baron o Brigade Commander.

I entered Philippine Marines afterwards, taking the steps of my late Tatay in the force. I had succeeded in countless missions, Marawi on top of all that.

I've been through a lot of hell from application, to cadetship, to being finally a defender of the state. Kaya naman siguro maiintindihan ako ng mga kapatid ko sa pwersa sa nararamdaman ko sa mga GAICS. That feeling of after everything you did, papalitan ka nalang nang walang pakiwari at pasabi. Para kang ibinasura na lang nang basta. Itinapon. Binalewala.

So when I heard of the new invention called the memory jet, and Catherina's claim that only GAICS can fly them, I did not hesitate to volunteer and be the challenger pilot of the AFP. Since I am their commanding officer, I said na parte na rin ito ng pagsubok ko sa kanila.

I smiled as I saw how beautiful this fighter plane is. She's designed to outshine all the other birds of the military world. I have always been a great fan of aviation.

Don't get me wrong. Marines is a branch of the Navy, yes. But we are specialized from land, to water, to aerial combats. Sanay kaming mag-maniobra ng tangke de gyera, mag-maneho ng barkong pandigma at mag-piloto ng fighter jets o ano pa mang military equipment.

"Are you sure about this Lieutenant?" Mashima Kimiwoto, the engineer of these memory jets, asked me. He is looking so dead worried. "These jets are really just part of my collaboration with Ms. Fuentebella. They're not meant for humans, they're made for GAICS because emotions can't trap them."

I smiled at him as I saw Catherina Fuente-b***h talking to the robot squad. Chaos isn't there. I heard that Azure will be the GAICS represent and not him. I'm not sure why he isn't here though.

"Of course, Mr. Kimiwoto. Masyado mo naman atang ina-underestimate ang totoong militar." I said, diverting my attention.

Ano bang pakialam ko sa kanya? Anong pakialam ko sa scientific evidences nya? I can surpass science.

"Hindi naman sa ganoon. Ang sa akin lang, once you drown in your memories, you'd crash with that plane. And it was the reason why the GAICS are created. We don't wanna risk lives." He explained.

Something in me felt bad for those robots. At the end of the day kasi, they are nothing but experiments. Mga pansangkalan. If they die, if they are ashened, no one in this association of scientist cares.

"Don't worry, Engineer." I said with a small smile. "I can handle it."

Dalawang planes ang nandito sa base. Medyo maraming tao dahil pati ang buong crew ni Fuente-b***h at nang kanyang asosasyon na AOPS --- Alliance of Outstanding Philippine Scientists ay narito sa kampo.

I heaved out a sigh as I walked towards my assigned plane. Nginitian ako ni Azure na naunang sumakay na sa kanyang Memory Jet.

"Are you sure hindi ka na aatras?" I turned to see Catherina smiling like a devil. "I mean, wala namang mawawala if you accept na hindi talaga para sa iyo ito."

She gestured playfully at the memory jet assigned to me.

"I'm an Oridala, Ma'am. And an Oridala never quits on anything." I spat before climbing up the metal railing.

Hindi ko na sya nilingon pa dahil ayokong mawala sa konsentrasyon ko. I was briefed that the memory jets are more efficient to use rather than traditional military birds. Wala itong manibela o control keys. So paano mapapalipad?

Simple lang. Direktang ikokonekta sa iyong utak ang system nito. By that, you and this plane can fly as one. Whatever you think of, it will do. It can glide or it can break the speed limits set without you, worrying about breaking the control system. All you have to do is one thing... stay awake, don't drown. Dahil ang pagkonekta ng memory jet sa utak mo, ay sya rin nitong paghalukay sa laman nito upang mas maging matibay ang koneksyon. If you stayed in your memories and let the emotions eat you, you'll come crashing down.

I gleefully stared at the spacious interior of the jet. Jet nga ang tawag rito ngunit tila isa na itong plane para sa akin. Malaki rin kasi ito nang bahagya at kaya sigurong maglulan ng tatlong tao pa bukod sa piloto nito. Mayroon rin itong isang cabin crew room sa bandang dulo sa kaliwang side.

I sat down at the pilot's seat and wore my flight goggles. Inilock ko ang seatbelt ko at huminga ng malalim bago pindutin ang command communication button.

"This is Lieutenant Rilea Oridala, Memory Jet MJ-1135 of Philippine Marines. Asking clearance for take off." I spoke clearly.

"Clearance granted, Lieutenant." The base responded. "Soar when you are ready."

I sighed before I grabbed the wires hesitantly. Para iyong mga aparato ng ECG. Kailangan isa isang idikit sa aking ulo para ma-access ang aking utak. When everything is set, I pressed the red button to start the neural handshake.

There was a hint of vibration and electric shock that filled my head before it brought me back to a memory.

"Harap sa kaliwa, rap!" The commanding officer's voice sounded.

Kaming mga plebo naman ay dagling sumusunod sa kung anumang iutos nito.

"Give me 100 push-ups, move!"

"1, 2, 3, 1! 1, 2, 3, 2! 1, 2, 3, 3!"

I blinked my eyes rapidly. 

"Neural connection, 88 percent." Saad ng robotic prompt voice sa hologramic dashboard.

Napangiti ako nang matanaw ko na hindi pa rin nakakalipad ang jet ni Azure.

"Base this is Lieutenant Oridala, and I'm ready for take off."

I said with might and before I knew it, my jet is already high up in the clouds.

Kimiwoto is a hell of a genius. This bird is by far the best I've ever handled! It feels a bit weird though to just think rather than press and manipulate controls and lever. I speeded towards the target destination smooth, enjoying the view of the sky as I go.

I turned off the communication and started shouting in bliss. Para akong tangang tuwang-tuwang lumilipad. It isn't my first time flying but it always feels like it. I really belong to the sky. And I have proven, that we are greater than those robots.

I smirked in annoyance of remembering Fuente-b***h's face.

Everything is going according to plan but then it hit me with that memory again.

"Happy birthday, Ril." He said, his voice shaking. I heard his sobs. "Please... please always stay strong, anak. Keep defending what we protect, my brave, brave, girl. Remember... Tatay loves you."

My tears fell. It was very short but it was the greates birthday message I received.

"I l-love you too, Tatay."

Then there were consecutive gunshots that shook my eardrum. I almost dropped the phone in shock. I was so sure it were taken at a very close proximity for it hurt my ears.

But what hurt it even more were the words of a stranger at the background with a thick and weird native accent.

"Patay na to!" Followed by a devilish laugh. "Tara, pugutin natin ulo!"

My heart raced against my chest. It felt like my ribs couldn't house the animal inside it anymore. It is on it's outrage.

"Rilea." I heard a familiar voice calling my name amidst the scene. "You gotta wake up! Ril, you have to wake up!"

That voice...

"WAKE UP!"

A loud beeping sound was the first to come into my ears. My sight got blurry and everything was turning. s**t! The jet is going gaga!

"Warning! Neural connection is cut. The plane is crashing. Please vacate the plane or reconnect the neural handshake."

Darn that memory!

I'm crashing! Napatulala na lamang ako sa pabulusok kong takbo.

"Take your damn self off that seat! I'm taking over!" 

Chaos. Why is he here?

In his hazel brown eyes were pure anger and paranoia. He looked so damn real. He looks so human as he stared at me. He shoved the neural machine off of me, and set me to a side. He took over the plane in no time and before I knew it, everything was back in track again.

It was all okay again.

He closed his eyes and sighed. He looked frustrated.

I didn't speak. The memory was a horror. I was shaking in its remnants but I tried to look composed as I wiped my tears away. Lintik na memory jet.

"Kapag kasi sinabing hindi para sayo, wag mong ipilit. Madidisgrasya ka pa." Chaos turned to me and stared intently.

I harshly wiped my tears away. Ayaw tumigil ng sakit at hapdi. Simpleng memorya lang, hindi ko mapagtagumpayang labanan.

"Who are you to tell me that?" I said bitterly.

"The man who saved you, I guess." He replied, rolling his eyes at my hardness.

"I didn't ask for your help. What are you even doing here on my jet? You are unauthorized." Saad ko at inirapan sya.

Para akong walang utang na loob, alam ko. Pero ayokong aminin sa sarili kong I owe Chaos one.

"Wow. You're welcome, huh?" He laughed sarcastically. Parang hindi sya makapaniwalang umiling.  "Muntik ka nang mamatay, pero pinapairal mo pa rin yang pride at ego mo. Ililipad ka ba nyan?"

He looked annoyed and I felt stabbed by that so I didn't reply.

"It does not hurt to admit that there are things that are out of your control. You can't do everything on your own." He lectured as if I was a young stupid girl.

He sighed.

"No man is an army, Ril." 

Ril. 

When he said that, he reminded me of the first man I loved. My first heartbreak. The reason I am crying again.

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