daylight darkens

if you've never loved an addict

I hate to say this but I hope it happens

And that you can still claim that it’s all a choice

As you go your first day just waiting to hear their voice

And you hold your breath as you pick up the phone

And then have to respond that no he still isn’t home

And right then you break a little inside

Because all you care about is that he’s alive

It doesn’t matter that he stole your car or your daughters Christmas

You’d forgive anything just to never have to feel like part of you is missing

Youd do anything to never have to feel whatever the Hell this is

As you hold on to hope that the next call will be him saying mommy I’m alright

But you’re also praying that if he’s going let Him go in his sleep tonight

Because your not sure either of you has any more will to fight

You’re only way of waking him is the promise of the mornings light

But then the problem comes when the sunlight isn’t home

And you wish more than anything that he doesn’t die alone

you want to be there but you don’t want to see it

When they tell you that he’s gone

You still slap his lifeless body

because you just don’t believe it

He is just sleeping

but looks stuffed inside his clothes

His lips are tinted blue

and the colors reached his nose

Laying there just like you left him before he died of an intentional overdose

It wasn’t an accident or a crime

He hated his life

When he died it was suicide

because you weren't reason enough to stay alive

and you left him

Now you have the things that have haunted you in your dreams

They harvest his organs

and you can't drown out your own screams

That escaped from your lungs the moment that he let go

He isn't gonna pick up the phone

He's never coming home

it's all because of you

Your son just overdosed