Where is my mind?

Dad/Mom/First love

Dad

i used to hate you for never being there

but i always had my hand out

in hindsight i understand

we both have our regrets

i realize that kids want their fathers to be perfect

its not that easy

we didn't notice any change

we thought it was a bad thing

we rebelled, feared, dismissed, and resented

but we never understood

you broke yourself down

to give us exerting we ever needed

the late nights, the overtime

the health issues, the deteriorating mind

you did it and still do

i just want to say

my biggest regret

is never giving you credit

you clearly wanted and deserved

it was not in vain

i see what you did

Mom

you tried so hard to give us everything

every day looking into our hearts

we had full belies and shelter

we had love and home cooked meals

every school play, every breakup

there for our triumphs and failures

you kept pictures of each step we grew

watching and admiring your work

wise and full of guidance

i always felt i could turn to you

we fought, we hugged, we cried, we lashed out

but we always came back

i knew i could always count on you

hesitant to ask

not out of fear of rejection

but because i knew you would fix it

despite your full plate

you never had time

but you would always make it for us

you wanted time

it was so fleeting

but i won't forget

where that time went

First Love

do you remember your first love?

mine was 2 people eloping

me from an invisible companion

her from neglect

i was afraid of mistakes

fearing a fight

it didn't come for so long

young love was fragile

i worked daily

repressing my complaints

complaints=fights=breakups

i fell deeper and deeper

we showed each other so much

our lives were so close

we knew so much about each other

i didn't let the honeymoon end

but futures came up

cold feet set in

i wasn't the only experience you wanted

so you left