The Broken Mirror

Secret

"X, if you don't stop harassing my friend," Gabrielle yelled at him. We sat on opposite ends of the couch. I had one of her feet and she had one of mines, massaging out the torture we put our feet through.

"Her feet shouldn't be on the couch," Xavier yells back. For some reason, he is bothered by my feet being on the couch, but honestly, I think he's just saying it because he is annoyed with how inseparable Gabrielle and I have become. The floor around the couch is covered with bags of clothes. Most of them are mines, but I made sure she came away with a few.

"Been on our feet for hours, can we not pamper each other," I exclaim glaring at him. I don't know why he annoys me so much. It drives me insane. He has an issue with us watching Dirty Dancing every week. He hates that I stay the night, somehow, we always end up in the kitchen in the middle of the night ignoring each other when I need to get water.

"X, if I didn't know any better, I think you were jealous... want me to rub your feet?" Ethan teases. He gets out of his chair and goes to 'massage' Xavier's feet. Xavier goes to push Ethan from him, but Ethan has the upper hand, squeezing Xavier's feet.

"Bro! That hurts!" Xavier says and he jerks his feet and kicks Ethan. Gabrielle and I burst out laughing at their stupidity. Ethan joins our laughter while Xavier just shakes his head. Guess he didn't find it funny that we were laughing at his expense.

It's now November and we just survived mid-terms. Somehow, I have been able to keep up with my work and it doesn't have me totally stressed out. I think having these three, well mainly Gabrielle and Ethan, have kept my stress levels low. Sometimes, Kristin and Brittany are with us, but they tend to do their own thing. That own thing happens when Kristin is fighting with Ethan.

My daily routine has become, school, lunch with Cookie and Gabrielle, shopping or whatever we choose to do. At the end of the day, if I don't have a paper or studying to do, I am at their house watching movies. Yet, I feel like a storm is brewing. Like things are too calm and with each passing day, it just feels like it's getting worse.

"What are your plans for Thanksgiving?" Ethan asks me. Ah-ha! That is the storm... Thanksgiving is coming. I hesitate to respond. The rest of the Alexanders will be invading my oasis of life I have created. I groan a little bit.

"Thanksgiving with my family," I say sighing.

"So, you'll be back in New York next week?" Gabrielle asks me. I shake my head no. It is time to fess up.

"We will be having Thanksgiving at their fourth home here, in the David Islands," I respond. All three of their eyes pop out of their heads. "It's been our tradition every year since my grandmother moved here years ago."

"Wait, fourth home?" Gabrielle says, realizing what I just said. I nod my head.

"Yes... they bought it so we can have thanksgiving every year with my grandmother. We have another home in Beverly Hills, a vacation home in Switzerland, and our Penthouse apartment on the Upper Eastside of Manhattan," I explain to them. They continue to stare at me like I have two heads.

"I was wondering how you could afford your clothes and mines. Why didn't you tell us?"

"My dad's family are billionaires and come from very old money. I wanted a fresh start away from their world." I realize that if I am going to survive Thanksgiving, I am going to need them there, including Xavier. "Listen, if you guys want, you can have Thanksgiving with me and my family."

"YES!" Gabrielle and Ethan yell in unison.

"Who would turn down Thanksgiving in a mansion?" Ethan says with the excitement of a giddy child.

"Me. That's a no," Xavier responds. Gabrielle and Ethan just stare and shake their heads at him.

"Do you want to do it?" Gabrielle asks Ethan. He smirks and hits Xavier in the back of his head.

"Woah! What was that for?"

"Smack sense into you," Gabrielle says to him.

"What? I don't want to go. I don't know these people."

"X, you are going!" Gabrielle demands as if she is his mother. I look at Xavier and begin to plead with my eyes. I don't know why I want him to come if his reaction is any indication of how much he drives me nuts. I watch him sigh as if he is making a final decision.

"I am making no promises!"

"Ugh, X, can you for once not give her so much trouble?" Gabrielle scolds him.

He chuckles at her. "What's the fun in that?"

"Yes, keep pretending like you aren't attracted to her," Ethan chimes in. Xavier's eyes go wide and then he glares at Ethan. I stare at the two of them, trying to figure out what Ethan just said.

"She's attractive, but... I... oh, believe what you want. See you at Thanksgiving!" Xavier gets off the recliner he was sitting on and heads to his bedroom. Once he is out of the room Gabrielle and Ethan burst out laughing at his tantrum.

"Why'd you have to say that? He tolerates me because of you two," I playfully scold Ethan.

"Sure, that's what is it," Gabrielle says sarcastically, which makes her, and Ethan laughs even harder. "Remember, Ethan is the mean one. Not Xavier." I shake my head at her, not wanting to believe what she is saying. He is nicer to everyone else but me. Ethan is the one who is usually making jokes at someone's expense.

"Maybe he's jealous of our friendship," I try to offer another explanation but all that does is make Ethan and Gabrielle laugh even harder. I start ranting. "It doesn't matter if he likes me or not. I don't do relationships or boyfriends. I have a no boyfriend policy. I plan to die a bachelorette, who was the cool aunt who traveled the world."

"Okay, okay, touchy," Ethan says trying to stifle his laugh. "So, the fresh start has nothing to do with an ex? I just assumed you were running from a guy, like most girls."

"Then what is the fresh start? You haven't told us much about your past." I stared at them both stunned, feeling like I have been backed into a corner. How do I answer this? I am still not ready to tell them about what all I've been through. What I've done.

"Just trust, that I needed a fresh start," I say hoping it is enough for them. "Now, in this fresh start, I need my new friends to spend Thanksgiving with me. I need to get going. I'll see you guys around school." I quickly get up and get my bags of clothes and leave.

The next few days go by quickly. Before I know it, it's the day before Thanksgiving and I am in a car with my grandmother. She's currently fighting through Tampa traffic. This should be a short drive to the island, but it's the day before Thanksgiving, during rush hour. Everyone is trying to get out of town. I stare at the beautiful palm tree that juts out in-between homes and buildings as we drive through the city.

We cross a short bridge that takes us over the Tampa Bay, that leads to the Davis Islands. The scenery begins to change from clustered buildings to beautiful expensive homes, that increase in size the closer we get to my family's home. The familiar driveway shows up first before you can see our home. The gate opens and we drive up to the house and stop in front of the stairs. Our basement is above ground, so the first floor can only be reached by a high staircase.

I climb out of the car and a servant runs over to the car to begin removing our bags. Another comes and takes the car keys from Cookie so that they can park the car in the garage. I take a deep breath and pray that these next four days go by without any issue. My therapist keeps trying to convince me that I need to do more things with my family, but I think he's the one insane. My family does nothing to help my sobriety.

"Oh, darling, you are here!" My mother says on her way down the stairs with her arms outstretched to hug me. It sounded so phony. I don't know who's she's trying to convince, but I know I am not her darling. I haven't been for the last couple of years.

"I told you I would be mother," I respond to her.

She grimaces. "You know I hate when you call me mother. Sounds like something out of the 1800s." I shrug my shoulders at her, she's lucky I did not call her Rebecca, her real name. Oh, well for trying to show some type of respect. I walk by her extended arms and Cookie quickly grabs her.

"What have we talked about Becca?" I hear Cookie say to her. My mother laces her arms with Cookie, and they walk up the stairs behind me. I see Apollo standing at the entrance looking taller than the last time I saw him. He gives me his usual hug that means my feet are not touching the floor. His shoulders are broader, and his squeeze feels tighter.

"You don't know how much I miss you!" He said.

"If it's as much as I missed you, I know it's a lot! Now come on! Let's go to my room!" I take off running. "Race you!" Very soon I realize racing him was a mistake. I might have long legs, but he doubles my speed, his legs being able to cover more ground than mines. When did this happen? I used to be faster than him. He crashes into my bedroom door as he opens it. When I finally make it to my door, he is already lying on my bed as if he was there for ten minutes.

"Okay, someone has definitely gotten faster," I say to him the moment I enter the bedroom. I drop my hands to my knees trying to take a breath. "Maybe I am getting out of shape."

Apollo just laughs, "Nah, I'm doing track and field now. Dad's been super impressed and has hired coaches to train me." That explains why he did not feel as lanky as I remember. My brother is turning into a man and I'm missing it all.

"Is he filling your head with Olympic dreams?" I ask him as I take up residence on my bed with him. I stare at his still boyish face, well what's left of it. I am missing so much, I'm missing him. "I am sorry for how distant I've been with you..."

"Nah, Si, I get it. Life hasn't been easy for you and you need to be here," He soothes me. I nod my head trying to dismiss the feeling of guilt.

"I wish you were here. So, tell me what all besides track and field is going on with you," I ask him. Apollo begins to tell me all about his last year in high school. He tells me about the girl he is currently seeing. How well he is doing with his schoolwork. The crazy shenanigans he and his friends get into, but most importantly the juicy gossip of the so-called New York elite, that we have grown up with.

"Oh, how I wish I had seen Laura's face. She has always been so annoying. I am so happy someone put her in her place," I say with glee over one of my former frenemies. "Y'know she was the main one going around telling everyone I was a slut."

"Last time I checked, you wore that slut badge with honor," Apollo giggles. I pick up my pillow and throw it at his head. He grabs my other one and begins to hit me back. He is not lying; I wore that scarlet letter like it was the Nobel Peace Prize. Although, his comment only stirred an epic pillow fight. Then I hear a loud cough and we both stop and turn to see Ethan, Gabrielle, and Xavier standing at the door.

"Hey, guys! Come in! How long have you guys been here?" I asked them, feeling flushed, knowing my thick red hair is probably all over my head. They step inside and Gabrielle takes a seat on my bed and Ethan finds the stool that is near my vanity. Xavier just stands near the entrance up against the wall.

"Ah, not too long. We were brought to our rooms. I've had better service here than at any hotel," Ethan replies.

"Why is this room so bright compared to your room at your grandmother's, like the walls are white?" Gabrielle asks me. I realize the stark difference in my furniture in this room compared to my bedroom.

"My mom decorated this one. I got to decorate mines. Trust me, my mom hates my bedroom at my grandmother's," I explain to her. "If I could paint the walls black. I would." Apollo makes weird noises and I realize I did not introduce them to him. "So, this is my amazing little brother Apollo... Apollo these are my friends Ethan and Gabrielle..., and this one I'm still deciding on is Xavier."

"As in boyfriend deciding on?" Apollo asks and both Xavier and I yell no to the delight of Gabrielle and Ethan.

"They'd have to get along for that to happen," Gabrielle explains to Apollo with the cheekiest grin.

"And it'll probably never happen," I add. Xavier slightly glares at me and I give him a devilish grin.

"Did you get to see the whole house?" I ask them. They shake their heads no.

"Show us, Casa Alexander!" Ethan exclaims. I begin with my room since they are already in it. I lead them to the bathroom that I used to share with Calypso. The bathroom looks more like a spa than a conventional bathroom. There is a very long counter with three sinks and a vanity area, that is stacked with make-up. There is a jacuzzi in one corner and five doors. One door leads to the shower, the other the toilet, one leads to the walk-in closet, and the two extra doors lead to my bedroom and hers.

"This is my walk-in closet," I say showing them. Gabrielle and Ethan step inside to look around.

"What does this door lead to?" Xavier asks. His hand is on the doorknob to my sister's room. I run over and grab his hand.

"No!" I yell. He looks down at my hand that is still touching his. He gives me the same empathetic look he gave me when I first met him. Like he knew everything. He squeezes my hand to reassure me that he won't push any further. My heart rate quickens.

"That was Calypso's room," Apollo says out loud. I shoot him a look. He quiets down from speaking any further. We all stand there in awkward silence for a moment.

"X, you can let go of her hand now...," Ethan teases. We both look down to see we were still holding hands and we quickly release each other's hands.

"Okay everyone, onto the entertainment room!" I say and they follow me out into our foyer on the second floor. I lead them to a door and open it to reveal a very small theatre. In the front is a stage with a screen behind it, but there are mics up there. "This is where we watch movies or have karaoke."

"Karaoke?" Ethan asks puzzled.

"Oh yeah, Siren can belt," Gabrielle explains to him. I turn to her and shake my head with my eyes wide. Like, shut up, Gabrielle! "Don't be so modest. I prefer your singing when we are in the car listening to the radio. Just tell them how you are classically trained."

"Yeah, she was amazing in New York. She had her own band, she got into LaGuardia High School of Performing Arts for both Dance and Vocals. She's even on a couple of our dad's albums," Apollo drops on them. Now I am going to kill him, instead.

"Wait, what? You did not say it was that deep. Just that you were trained," Gabrielle said. "And dad's albums?"

"Your dad is, the James Alexander," Xavier says shocked. I look at him more shocked than he looks.

"You know of my dad's music? Most people our age do not know who he is, since he does more opera and Broadway," I ask him stunned that he knows of my father. "Well since the cat is out of the bag. I had a budding career in New York. I did shows at clubs, even though I was not old enough. I did covers of other artists. Old stuff, like Etta James, Elvis, I also had a set I called the British Ladies,

"Mainly Adele and Amy Winehouse. I also had a set called Jane, doing some of the songs from Maroon 5's first album. Most of my audience were Millennials. I was starting to audition for Broadway shows. The clubs would joke that I would come in looking like some version of Jessica Rabbit because of my red hair and old school style."

They all, except for Apollo, are staring at me in disbelief. I feel like I am telling them about a whole other person. I am not that girl anymore, who was trying to be just like her dad. Music gave me joy. It was something I needed to release. I still listen and playfully sing in the shower or car, but nothing like what I used to do. Besides with my issues, how well could my career have gone?

"Now you have to sing for us now," Ethan says. I shake my head no and they all except for Xavier plead for me to sing.

"I want you to sing two of my favorite songs from your Jane set," Apollo begs. I knew that is what he would want. I roll my eyes and march over to the machine that plays the music for the karaoke. I find, Maroon 5's Sunday Morning.

The music begins to play, and I close my eyes, "Sunday morning rain is falling, steal some covers, share some skin," I begin to sing. It feels like I am on a bicycle after not riding for years. My voice does exactly what it needs to do. I feel like I am back at one of the clubs or the Subway station, which was another location I loved to go to. "That may be all I'll need (all I need) In darkness, he is all I see (all I see), Come and rest your bones with me, driving slow on Sunday morning, And I never want to leave." I do all the ad-libs I remember doing and scaling and an overwhelming amount of joy sweeps over me. "There's flower in your hair, I'm a flower in your hair, oh, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, ah, whoa, oh, yeah whoo."

The music stops and they all applaud my performance and I mockingly bow. I am not too sure if it was mockingly. I really wanted to clap for myself.

"I need one more song from that set," Apollo says to me. "Secrets." I roll my eyes at him.

"Why that one?" I ask him. It was not one of their singles, but I loved the way it sounded. It was sultry and probably why they began telling me I looked like Jessica Rabbit. "Fine, I'll do Secrets for you."

I turn to the next song and wait for the music to begin. The intro is long, but it helps to set the mood. "Watch the sunrise, say your goodbyes, off we go, some conversation, no contemplation, Hit the road," I begin to sing the first stanza, remembering why I loved this specific song when I sung it. Holding onto the mic like it was my lover and slowly moving my body like a snake.

"I know I don't know you. But I want you so bad. Everyone has a secret...," I continue to sing the chorus and I have focused my attention on Xavier. His eyes are intent on me. Gabrielle and Ethan somehow have not noticed that I changed the show to focus on him. It does not matter how much he annoys me, I still find him really sexy. That is probably why I wanted him to come to the house.

"Cool these engines, calm these jets, I ask you, how hot can it get? And as you wipe off beads of sweat. Slowly, you say, I'm not there yet," I sing very breathy in my sultriest voice. Xavier's eyes are still focused on mines as I continue to finish up the song, repeating the chorus one final time. "Oh, but can they keep it? Oh, no they can't."