Chapter 5 Chad
1199 Words
“So, you don’t have a kid?” I asked Alex after almost an hour of
complete and utter silence.
He didn’t reply. He was too ashamed to speak. But it was
clear that he was perplexed by my question.
“I accidentally tripped on your luggage and spilled your stuff earlier when
you were in school,” I began to explain. “I saw those things. I thought they
were for a baby. Your baby.”
“No,” he feebly muttered. He was sitting on the edge of his bed and
facing the window. He was too abashed that he didn’t even dare to look at me
since I got back. He did change his clothes during that time, though,
removing that eerie-looking onesie and dropping that ridiculous pacifier
that’s been dangling from his mouth.
“I should’ve figured that out,” I remarked as I clicked my tongue, hating
myself for failing to realize something that should’ve been obvious. “The
onesie’s too big for a child. And those were adult diapers. Still, I never even
entertained the thought that they’d be for you.” I paused a bit to take a deep
breath before delivering what I felt was the most important question of all.
“Alex... why?”
He shook his head before slamming his palms on his face. “I... I don’t
know...” he answered, sobbing like the child he was pretending to be an hour
ago. “I’m... I’m sorry, Chad... I’m so sorry...”
He was weeping uncontrollably that it made me feel anxious and
uncomfortable. “Can you please stop that?” I asked him.
“B-But I... I made your girlfriend run away...”
“Yeah you did,” I confirmed a part of what he said. “You scared the shit
out of her. But she ain’t my girlfriend. We just hooked up at the pub.”
“I ruined your night...”
“Oh yes, you certainly did,” I validated as a restrained frown began to
form on my face. I tried to curtail my frustration. It could’ve been a beautiful
night... and a wild one too. That chick was a stunner, and she seemed game
for anything. And now, she’s gone. Damn it!
“I scared you...” he went on with the things he was remorseful for.
“You didn’t really scare me scare me,” I clarified. “It’s more like you
freaked me out. I mean, come on, man! You were dressed up in a onesie.
With a pacifier. And you were crawling on your bed. Who’d ever expect to
see something like that in his own home?”
“I’m sorry, Chad,” he said once again as he continued to wail. “I’m so...
so... so sorry...”
I sighed. “Enough apologies, man,” I told him. “I really, really, really just
want to know why. Why were you dressed up like that? And why do you
wear diapers?”
He fell silent once more. His sobbing stopped but he was still sniffing. It
seemed like he couldn’t answer my queries.
“Come on, Alex,” I pleaded. “Let’s level with each other here. Let’s be
honest with one another. We’re supposed to live together for the next four
months, after all...”
He lifted his head all of a sudden, surprised by what he just heard. “Live
together?” he repeated my words. “For the next four months?”
“You heard me.”
“Y-You mean... you’re not... not... not kicking me out?”
Eh? With all the weird s**t that happened tonight, staying at my place
was still his top concern? This guy’s sense of priorities was even more
demented than his preference for baby stuff.
“Dude,” I replied. “I couldn’t kick you out even if I wanted to. We’re
supposed to be stepbrothers. We’re supposed to be family. We’re supposed to
look out for one another.”
It was then when he finally turned around to face me. His eyes were red
and his lips were shaking. He was at the verge of tears once again. “T-Thank
you, Chad...”
“Don’t you dare cry again,” I warned him. “Or else I’m gonna take back
what I said.”
He nodded.
“Now, answer my question, Alex,” I told him again. This time, I made it
sound like an order. “Why?”
“It’s just... who I am,” he mumbled his response, ashamed of what he was
revealing. “I’ve been like this for as long as I can remember. I never really
outgrew diapers. Nor my other baby needs.”
“Including milk?” I reminded him of the other things that I found in his
suitcase. “I mean, I’m sure it was baby’s milk.”
“Y-Yes,” he verified.
“And this... condition... of yours... is it like something that you can’t
help?” I wanted to know, trying to determine if he was suffering from some
kind of mental issue that might need intervention. “Is it something that you
don’t have control of?”
He pondered for a bit before replying. “I... I can control it,” he said with a
strangely certain tone.
“Good,” I declared. “Then control it from now on. I don’t want seeing
you in a onesie or with a pacifier or feeding from some damn bottle,
understand?”
Alex seemed hesitant to agree.
“Listen, man,” I began to say, “Those baby things? You find it hard to let
go of them. I get that. But there will come a time that one has to let go of
such quirks. And for you, dude, that time’s now. You’re eighteen. You’re a
college freshman and you’re in San Francisco. You’ve got your entire life
ahead of you. So let them go. Just f*****g let them go, okay? As you’ve said,
you can control yourself. You can choose not to do them. So don’t do them
anymore.”
Alex nodded in agreement. “Yes, Chad,” he said. “I won’t do it again.
And... thank you... for understanding... for not kicking me out of your place...
for being so kind... for being you...”
“Shut it, bro!” I belted. “You’re turning this s**t into an episode of Days
Of Our Lives. Come,” I invited him as I stood up. “This dramarama made me
hungry. Let’s go grab something to eat.”
Alex got up from bed with a smile on his face. It looked like a sincere
beam, one born from relief and appreciation and joy. But no matter how
hopeful his beam seemed, I couldn’t help but feel that there was something
else there.
There, at the edge of his lower lip that touched his cheek...
A slight curl that was easy to miss...
A curve that bent downwards like a soldier who refused to march with the
rest of his platoon...
A shadow that undermined the happiness he was showing...
A tinge of resentment...
A hint of gloom...
- Writer
