The Unknown Of What I Am

Chapter 7

Kanna's POV

I slowly opened my eyes. Everything was blury, but the smell in here was putrid. I involuntarily gagged. "What in the f**k happened?" I said. I couldn't feel Scarlet at all inside me. I looked around when my vision cleared. It was disgusting and frightening all at once. I screamed at the top of my lungs. One scream ended, another ripped through my throat. There were about eight dead deer rotting in my room. I pressed my hand against the the wall, but pulled it away quickly as it was smeared with sticky blood. I screamed again and fell backwards. I curled up in a ball and cried on the floor. "This is a nightmare. This is a nightmare. This is a nightmare." I repeated over and over again. The door clicked open. "Kanna?" I heard a familiar voice, but I couldn't tell who it was. When I looked up, I didn't recognize him at all. I crawled away from him when walked forward.

"Kanna, do you know who I am?" He asked. I shook my head. I didn't trust my words. He sighed and looked at me with loving eyes. "It's okay if you don't know me anymore. I'm just glad that you are alive." He smiled at me. I tilted my head. "Don't worry about it." He said and walked away, leaving the door wide open. I looked down at my hands and saw they were covered in blood. The white dress I was wearing had dark blood stains all over it. I slowly stood up and walked quietly to the door and peeked out. No one was there so I stepped out.

I wandered around for a while before I found myself in a kitchen. I walked over to the sink and washed the blood off my hands. I pulled some water over to my dress, using my powers, I removed the blood from the dress. Leaving it a beautiful white again. I smiled at it and turned around. A woman was standing there smiling. I jumped and squealed. "Oh I'm so sorry, darling. I didn't mean to scare you. Are you alright?" She asked me. I nodded, but I walked away. I had no clue who she was.

I walked outside and smelled the clean air. I walked around on the grass feeling it on my toes like I haven't felt it before. I don't think I have. I don't remember. I looked up at the sky. The sun on my skin tingled. I began spinning in a slow circle. "Kanna, I'm glad to see you awake again." Someone said. I jumped and looked at him. I didn't know who he was either. I gave him a strange look and backed away. "No, no. Please don't be afraid of me. I will never hurt you." He looked sad.

"W-who are you?" I asked. Another pained look crossed his eyes.

"Ryu. I am Ryu. Do you remember your name?"

"Kanna Lilith."

"That's good. I'm going to tell you my last name, are you ready?" He asked. I could see that he was being cautious. Like he was afraid something might happen. I nodded for him to tell me. "My name is Ryu. Ryu Lilith." He said.

I blinked for a few times. He had my last name. How? Is he playing a trick on me? No. It doesn't look like he was lying. "Are you my big brother?" I asked.

He smiled a sad smile. "No. I am you little brother." I felt a smile growing on my lips. I squealed happily and pulled him into a hug.

"I have a little brother! I'm so happy! I've never had a little brother before!" I jumped up and down with excitement. He laughed. He let me to my jumping and running around until I was calm again.

"There are a few people I want you to meet, but only if you are ready to meet them." He said.

I tilted my head to the left. "Who?" I asked.

"You will see. I don't think you are quite ready yet." He lightly pat my head.

I pouted. "But big brother!" I whined. He gave me a strange look.

"I'm not the older one Kanna. You are." I shrugged, and he sighed.

"You are bigger than me therefore, you are big brother." I giggled. He couldn't hide the smile.

"You hungry?" He asked. I looked down at my stomach then back up and nodded. "Come than. I'll get you something to eat. What do you feel like eating?"

I thought for a moment. "Do you have bacon and deer meat and rabbit blood?" I asked.

He froze for a moment but nodded. "I do. How do you want the meat cooked?"

"Not." I simply said. He furrowed his brow, but shook his head.

We entered the kitchen and he sat me on a stool at the counter. I watched as he defrosted the meat and set it on a plate. He then pulled out a jar of blood from the fridge and heated it on the stove. He made himself some cooked food while I ate mine raw. After clearing my plate, I sipped at the warm rabbit blood.

"Where is everyone? Isn't there normally people in houses this big?" I asked.

He looked down at his plate. "They left for a while. There are only four of us left here."

"Why?" I asked. He sighed cleaned up our plates. He left my cup alone for me to finish.

"I don't want to push you before you are ready to hear it."

"Big brother. That man I saw before, he sounded familiar. Do I know him?"

He nodded. "Yes Kanna. You know him very well."

"Can I meet him?"

"Are you sure you are ready to meet him?"

I nodded happily. "Yes big brother! I want to meet him!" He nodded and helped me off the stool. I grabbed my cup and followed him up the stairs. He stopped in front of a fogged glass door. Knocking twice, "Come in." was heard from inside. Ryu and I entered the room and I saw him again. He looked at me with loving eyes.

"Hello Kanna." He said softly. I stepped behind Ryu to hide from him.

"You don't need to hide from him, Kanna. You know him very well. I told you this in the kitchen." Ryu said.

I took a deep breath to calm myself and peeked out at the man sitting a a large wooden desk. "Hello." I said shyly.

His smile lit up his eyes. "Do you know my name?" He asked.

I shook my head "No. I don't know your name."

"That's alright. My name is Alexander Williams." He said. The name sounded familiar, but I couldn't place it. I couldn't place this name or man anywhere in my life.

"I'm sorry. I don't remember you. Could you tell me more?"

"Well, that's up to your little brother here." He said.

"No! He's bigger than me so he's big brother!" I yelled, sticking out my lip in a pout.

He chuckled. "I'm sorry. That's up to your big brother here."

"Big brother, can he tell me more?" I asked. Ryu looked hesitant for a moment.

"A little bit. Not too fast either, Alex." Alexander nodded and offered the seat in front of the desk. I took it happily waiting for a story.

"Well, I was in the city quite a few years ago. One night, I decided to take a walk along the quiet streets to take a break. As I was walking, I saw this young woman talking to this shady man near a dark alley. I saw him offer her his hand. When she was about to take it, I stopped him and he ran away. That young woman's name was Kanna Lilith." He went on with his story, and slowly my memories came back, but many of them were still missing.

He finished his story where I had fallen into slumber up on the mountain after drinking a rabbit dry of blood. "What happened after that?" I asked.

He looked down at the desk. "You went into a deep slumber only ever waking to feed. The sun in your room didn't seem to bother you so no one closed the curtains. We couldn't go in and clean the dead animals out because we were afraid you would go crazy over them not being in there. Vampires tend to keep their kills around until they are bones. It's been two years since we were up on that mountain. I was afraid that my mate was never going to wake up again. I am glad that you are awake, but I am sad that you have little to no memory left."

Tears rolled down my cheeks. "I'm sorry." I cried. Both Ryu and Alexander looked at me.

"No, no. Please don't cry little sister. It's okay. You'll get your memories back. I have a feeling you will." Ryu hugged me tightly.

I sniffled a few times and wiped my eyes. "Ryu, I want to go outside and play with Alex."

He looked between me and Alexander. "If Alex isn't too busy. Maybe you should ask him."

I smiled and pounced up onto the desk knocking all the papers there onto the floor. "Alex! Come play! Come play!"

"I--" He paused and looked up at me giving him puppy eyes. "I can't say no to that. But, I have something important I need to do."

I tilted my head to the left. "What is it?" I asked.

No, Alex. She isn't ready for that." Ryu said. It seemed like they were keeping something from me.

I pouted and ran off. "They don't want me to know. They are afraid of me." I kept thinking. I ran out of the house and into the forest. I kept running until I tripped and fell. I cried. Tear after tear after tear fell from my eyes. I heard some chirping, but I didn't bother to look up until I saw a little blue bird land in front of me. "What do you want birdy?" I sniffled. It chirped again and got closer to my hand. When I reached out and touched it, it jumped into my hand. I lightly pat its head and smiled. I saw a memory pass though my mind. This little bird, was a bird that I really liked. I had always called him Papa. "Papa?" I whispered. He chirped happily and I smiled more. I stood up and wiped my tears away giggling as he cuddled into my neck.

"Kanna!" Ryu called for me.

"Ryu!" I called back. A moment later, he was in front of me hugging me like he hadn't seen me in years.

"Kanna, please don't run off like that. You scared me near to death!" He said, worry clear as day on his face.

I looked down to the ground not longer smiling. "I'm sorry big brother." He hugged me again and sighed.

"It's alright. Just don't run off anymore okay?" He said. I nodded and he took me back to the house. I saw Alexander pacing on the front deck.

"Kanna!" He yelled and ran to me. He hugged me tighter than Ryu did. I let out a squeak trying to breathe. He let go and checked me over.

"I found Papa!" I yelled. Alexander blinked a couple of times. I pointed to the little blue bird on my shoulder.

"Oh yes! Papa. He never really left your side. I mean, we didn't let him into the room with you. We were afraid you would have fed off him, so he would just sit outside your window watching you. Only leaving to eat or drink." Alexander smiled, lightly touching Papa.

"What is so important that you can't come play with me?" I asked.

Ryu and Alexander exchanged a look. It seemed like they were talking, but I couldn't hear anything. "Kanna, I'm going to tell you something." Ryu finally spoke up.

I looked at him, giving him my full attention. "Kanna, Alexander is a father." he said. I looked at him with my eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "Alex is your mate. He never laid with another woman other than you at the river. Alex is a father, which makes you, Kanna, a mother." He said it slow. I took a moment. It hit me. I was a mother. I don't even remember giving birth to a baby. My breathing increased and I put my hand on my chest. My heart was racing.

"Kanna? Are you okay?" Alexander asked. I looked at him, but my world was spinning. I fainted.

Ryu's POV

I sighed and picked Kanna up into my arms. "I knew she wasn't ready."

"The only way to know is to try. I know now that she's not ready to meet Lillian. I'll have my mom and dad come pick her up before Kanna wakes up." Alex sighed.

It has been a hard two years. Lillian was being raised by Alex alone. He and I had to fight with Kanna during every feeding while she was pregnant. After the birth, Kanna never woke up. She just kept sleeping. During the night, she would get up and feed off a fresh deer we would leave in her room, but she wasn't there. She never responded to her name or even to Lillian's cries. Scarlet had vanished when Kanna's vampire parts took over. Alex at one point gave up hope and remained in his room with Lillian. Kanna woke up about a week ago, but she ran into Lillian and that didn't turn out well. Lillian knows who she is, but Kanna doesn't know much of anything. When Kanna went back into her slumber, it broke Alex again. Now, Kanna is awake and we chose to make sure that Kanna was ready before anything. She seemed to handle Alex and I pretty well, but I'm afraid that her fainting when she heard she was a mother, might put her back into that slumber again.

I reached my room and placed her on my bed. Her room was still way to dirty for a dainty flower that she is right now. I gently touched her ever growing hair. "Please don't go back to sleep sister. I might just break this time." I whispered to her. I left the side of my bed to go clean up her room.

"Big brother. Don't leave me. I don't want you to be a sacrifice." She mumbled in her sleep.

"Alex! My room! NOW!" I yelled in the link. He showed up a moment later.

"What?" He whispered.

"She's talking in her sleep. Listen."

"Alexander. Stay away. I don't want to hurt you." She whimpered. "Please don't die. Don't leave me alone." Tears began to roll from her eyes.

Alex went to go to her, but I stopped him shaking my head. He looked at me then back the Kanna.

"Alex, come play. Ryu, don't stop Alex from playing with me. Those stupid papers can wait." She mumbled. "My baby."

That was the moment I knew she was going to be ready when she woke up. She never spoke in her sleep before. She didn't even move much. When she called out for her baby, my heart leaped for joy. I smiled at Alex who was standing there in shock. I don't think he knew this was coming. We left the room after she rolled to face the wall.

"Alex. She's remembering. This is great! Lillian will get to meet her mother fully and you can have the family you were always dreaming of having."

He nodded, but something looked off in his eyes. "What if she forgets again? What if the stress of our daughter is too much for her to handle and she goes back to sleep? I don't know if I'd be able to handle it again. Her talking in her sleep gives me hope, but also not. Ryu, you are my beta and I trust you with my secrets, but if she forgets again, I won't live through it."

I pulled him into a tight hug. "Everything will be alright. I just know it will."