R.E.D.

VIII

I can't feel anything...

She gasped at the sight of the blood on her hands. On her feet.

And the gun in her hand.

The drug is wearing off now. She can feel it.

Everything seemed blurry, hazy. She can't cleary remember why she was in that room.

A mission. Yes. She's here for the target.

The target? Who's that target?

"Red! Can you hear me?"

Lucas?

"Finish her now!"

Lucas.

She blinked.

Standing in front of her is a twelve-year-old girl. Or maybe younger.

She looks so small and weak. So helpless.

"But....a...a child. It's a child." She barely whispered. But enough to be heard on the earpiece.

She wont do it. She can't do it.

She have to kill the heiress. That's mission. But she never thought she could be this young.

"That f*****g child is the target. That's the heiress! You can't fail me, Red. You know what I'm capable of."

Lucas.

Of course, she knew.

The chains again. The belts. Their d***s and tongues.

She must do this.

She sighed as she slowly walked towards the girl. Her arm stretched, pointing the gun at the girl as if her body moved by itself.

"Ple...please...please don't kill me." The girl whispered, almost inaudibly. Tears and blood ran through her cheeks.

Blood. Red blood.

She smiled. "Silly little girl."

She looked terrified. Who would not be? She looks like a deranged demon now.

A demon without a conscience.

"Goodnight."

And she pulled the trigger.

* * *

Mabilis na napabangon si Rose sa kama. Basa ng pawis ang buhok at katawan.

"Fuck.."

She remembered it perfectly. Everything.

Nararamdaman na naman niya ang pangingig nang kalamanan. Ang ginaw. Ang sakit. Hindi na siya makahinga.

"No...Stop..."

But everytime she wants to end it, it kept pulling her back.

Rose, do it. Finish the target.

"No! Please no!"

"Rose!"

Yumugyog ang kama at isang pares ng mga braso ang yumakap sa kanya.

"I'm here. I'm here... It's ok... It's going to be OK."

"B-Buds..." Habol hininga niyang sambit. "Buds..."

Napayakap siya sa braso nito nang mahigpit. Na parang iyon nalang ang pwede niyang kapitan kundi tuluyan na siyang malulunod uli. "Buds make it stop. Make it stop.."

"Sandali." Sambit nito. Bahagya itong humiwalay sa kanya. Nakaramdam na naman siya ng takot.

"Don't! Don't leave. Dito...dito ka lang."

"Shs. Ok na. Ok lang." Nakita niya ang pagabot nito nang pillbox sa kanya. Agad niya iyong inagaw at tinaktak ang ilang piraso ng mga tableta sa kamay. Mabilis niyang dinala iyon at nilunok. Kinuha rin niya ang basong inabot nito at uminom.

"Dito lang ako." Sabi pa ni Buds. Humilig naman siya at yumakap dito nang mahigpit. "You're safe here, I promise."

Napapikit siya.

Kung bakit ba ayaw siyang tigilan nang mga bangungot na yon. Nahihirapan na rin siyang itago. Parang ano mang oras, sasabog na siya.

Alam nang pamilya ang pinasok niya. Pero hindi lahat ng pinagdaanan niya.

Her family came from a long line of soldiers. They were the founders of the System. A mercenary association na nag-ooperate sa buong mundo since World War Two.

Gusto lang naman niyang sumunod sa yapak ng mga ito. Gusto lang naman niyang maging katulad nila at maging proud sa kanya ang ama.

And she did. Pero dumating ang oras na kinakain na siya ng konsenysa sa bawat buhay na tinatapos. But she have to do her job.

That's when Lucas came in. He became her handler. And after that were the nightmares.

The missions become grimmer and grimmer. He gave her the dirtiest job not even veterans can't handle. He conditioned her to kill without hesitation. Nawala na ang inhibisyon niya sa lahat. Nawala ang lahat ng pakiramdam. Para lang siyang puppet na pinapasunod sa utos.

Then Indigo and Blue saved her.

Huminga siya nang malalim habang unti-unting kumakalma ang lahat. Nakakahinga na siya nang maluwag. Bumalik na rin sa normal ang pakiramdam.

"Buds..."

"Hindi ako aalis, Rose." Dinig niyang bulong nito kasabay nang marahang paghalik sa buhok.

Pero naalala niyang siya ang umalis noon. Siya ang nang-iwan.

"Y-you...You don't have to do this." Aniya. Sinubukan niyang kumalas pero di siya binitawan nito.

"Let me take care of you."

"Buds. I don't deserve this."

"You do." He whispered. He held her closer so that she could almost hear his heart. "Wag ka nang matakot. Nandito lang ako sa tabi mo."

Napapikit siya.

She's safe. She's at peace with him.

Kung sana kaya niyang suklian yon.

"Buds, I'm sorry. I'm sorry."

"You shouldn't. Naiintindidihan kita." Sabi nito.

Hindi. Hindi yon. Hindi dahil doon.

"I'll always be here, Rose. Kahit anong mangyari, nandito lang ako."

Napapikit nalang siya.

I'm sorry.