The weight of the crown

Chapter 7

I stood in front of my parents without looking into their eyes.

Marianne woke me earlier than usual today when she was dressing me in a long-sleeved gold dress.

She gathered my brown hair in a Chinese braid that came to my shoulders with a thin crown of gold on my head, the golden color gleaming in the sunlight too.

I was so tired, I couldn't sleep at night, and I was thinking about my meeting with the mysterious boy.

The makeup on my face hid my fatigue a little, and I hoped my parents would talk soon that I could go to my room.

I finally dared to raise my head when I heard footsteps, more than one person. "He's here, Your Excellency" One of the servants approached my father and bowed slightly.

My father looked at him and nodded briefly. He and my mother got up from their seats and some of the counselors in the room left the room.

"What happened?" I murmured more to myself than to them, I didn't understand why everyone was suddenly leaving the room.

"Come, darling, we're heading for the courtyard," my mother said, making me look at her in confusion.

"Why?" I asked, but she didn't answer me, but examined my face, as if trying to check something.

"You're ready," she whispered quietly, and she and my father walked ahead of me and I knew they expected me to follow them at the same pace.

As we got closer to the court, I noticed how neat it all looked, despite the colder weather. All the leaves that covered the ground were now swept away and the ground remained empty. Silver-colored ribbons were tied to the trees.

I noticed the many people standing in or around the yard, looking at my parents every few minutes, whispering quietly or talking excitedly ,as if they were waiting for something, or rather for someone. Who could have made such an interest among the people of the palace?

The sound of trumpets was heard and my parents stopped walking. Now we stood in front of a stone path, I was looking sideways in incomprehension, and when I noticed Tomas, I looked at him until he looked at me too, hoping to give me a slight hint of what was going on. He raised one eyebrow and seemed a little amused.

He just looked at my rather elegant dress and then back at me. I didn't understand what he was trying to hint to me but the sound of applause caught my attention.

My parents came forward when someone stood in front of them, bowed slightly, and I was just curious to know who it was.

Then my mother turned slightly and realized that I had to go forward. I walked slowly, feeling the countless people watching me.

There was a boy in front of me with bright brown eyes and black hair, he was just as tall as I remembered, the only difference being that he was wearing fancy clothes, too, in shades of gold.

I looked at him in surprise and as he looked from my father at me it seemed that he, too, had not expected to see me standing in front of him.

"Alexandra dear, this is William, Prince of Ireland," she said, but I still didn't understand why there was so much preparation just to welcome the Prince of Ireland.

It made no sense to me. he came from an enemy state, one that attacks us and hurts our soldiers.

Why my parents smile at him and look suddenly happy, why have they invited ...I gasped when I understood what my brother was trying to hint me, and it seems that my mother read my thoughts, because a smile came over her face.

"This is your future husband," she said, but with her slight smile I saw something false, and she seemed to give me a warning, despite her sweet tone.

She warned me that I wouldn't do anything foolish and that I had to behave as pleasantly and calmly as she did, that I didn't want to know what would happen if I broke this marriage.

William looks less stunned than me and he walks over to me slowly as he bends down and kisses my hand softly, "Nice to meet you, princess," he said, he made me look at him with big eyes, a look of fear and confusion. He left me speechless.

My parents were smiling and all the people in the yard looked at us expectantly, apparently thinking what a lovely couple we were.

How could I not have guessed this morning that this is what my parents wanted?

The extravagant dress, the excitement Marianne had tried to hide from me, and all the preparations made this week at the castle.

Why was I so blind and not paying attention to it, as if everyone knew what was going to happen today and I lived in a world of my own, withdrawn and isolated.

I wasn't ready for it.

Even from the moment Thomas informed me about it, and now, two weeks after the conversation with him, the moment had come, and I wasn't ready.

I wanted to shout at my parents for their carelessness, to take off the crown from my head, and take off the tight dress. I couldn't stand here in front of all these people, pretend I was happy, bow and say 'Your Highness,' I simply couldn't.

I was aware that Ireland was an enemy of England, that if we made an alliance with her, we would gain a significant advantage over Scotland.

At that moment I looked at his brown eyes and knew I couldn't stand here anymore, I didn't even know him. I didn't know what color he liked if he had a brother or sister if he liked chocolate as much as I did.

But these questions seemed stupid now, questions that wouldn't really help me know what I most wanted to know if we had a chance if we could love each other.

Before I could regret it, I took a few steps back when a moment later I found myself running, as fast as I could.

In the background, I heard my father instruct me to come back, but I pushed his voice away from my head and kept running.

I ran to the forest, I knew it was dangerous, that I wasn't allowed to enter alone, but I knew that no one would come here. It was such a secluded and quiet place, there was something relaxing in the forest. The trees were clinging to each other as they reached high to the sky.

Their branches were naked from leaves, and on the floor were some of the leaves, in shades of red. Tears slowly fell down my face as I wiped them.

I thought of my parents, who probably were trying to reassure William and tell him that I must have been a bit nervous or very excited and so I ran, I knew that once they found me they would scold me for my shameful behavior.

I guess Tomas will also get mad at me that I couldn't be more mature, and when I tell Erika she'll laugh at me and tell me it's a great way to impress a guy.

And what would William think? I didn't know and didn't care, I hoped he'd decide I was too childish and leave the palace.

When I saw a thick tree relative to the others, I took off my shoes, which weighed heavily on my legs, and climbed slowly over the branches of the tree until I reached a high branch from which I could look on the rest of the forest but from a higher angle.

I looked up at the sky that looked a little gray, I hoped it would rain, the clear sign that the winter had begun.

I heard approaching footsteps and wished that there was a place where I could hide.

"You better get off the tree if you don't want to fall." I heard a familiar voice. I tried to wipe away the tears that continued down my cheeks.

I looked down for a second, watching William lean on the tree and with his arms crossed and looking at me from below when his eyes caught mine, I looked away immediately, for a moment I thought I heard him grinning at my childish behavior, and it irritated me.

"Everyone is looking for you," he said as if he expected me to be interested, but it just made me want to stay on the tree and never go down.

"I'm going to tell them you're here," he said after a few minutes of silence in which I said nothing. He seemed to know that this was what would make me speak because I straightened straight up.

"Do not do that," I said at once, I regretted that my voice was so quiet and desperate.

He stopped his walk and walked back toward the tree, apparently reflecting on what I was saying.

"Okay, but you need to get off the tree," he said seriously, and although I didn't want to talk to him, I realized that was the best offer I could take.

With light steps, I stepped off the branches as if they were part of a large ladder.

I stood on the cold ground and looked at my feet.

"Why did you run?" He asked quietly but still in a calm tone, I didn't understand how he managed to maintain a calm expression even when I knew that he must be angry at the fact that I ran away, or was he actually relieved that he would not have to be with me longer than he needed.

Maybe he was disappointed, perhaps he expected to meet someone more like my parents, with blond hair and smooth blue eyes like the sea, someone beautiful.

What difference does it make?" I said, running my hands over my face.

Despite the cold, I was hot and sweating.

"In any case, they'll scream at me and I'll have to apologize to you for my shameful behavior," I said.

"I don't want to marry, just like you," he said quietly, adding quickly, "at least not like that"

"I'm sure that with a little persuasion you'll be able to find a match with someone else." I joked, but it didn't make him laugh, but now he seemed to get annoyed.

"It doesn't depend on me and it doesn't matter what I think, I'm going to be king soon, and I have to think about the future of my country, and I don't understand why you don't do the same thing," he said irritably.

"Of course I care, I love my country," I said more clearly now.

"It doesn't look like that. I only met you yesterday, and you already look like a spoiled princess who cries whenever she doesn't get what she wants," he said stiffly and my cheeks became red.

"You have no right to judge me," I said, feeling my hands tighten into fists.

"I don't want to get married, because it means that I'll be locked up in the palace forever, with a man I'll probably never love, that I'll have to keep obeying and doing what I'm told, that I'll never be truly independent," I said and felt the tears fall down my face again.

I didn't want him to see me like that, crying. I skirted his figure and walked back toward the palace, but he kept me from walking.

"I think you should start thinking about your country, your enemies, stop acting like a little girl and deal with things, you have to open your eyes and understand what's really happening under your nose," he said seriously, his brown eyes suddenly threatening, "Your people don't want a leader who won't know how to help them in the difficult moments and won't sacrifice herself for them," he said stiffly, leaving me alone, perhaps to give me time to think about what he had said.

I wanted to tell him that he was wrong. that he didn't know me, that he was insolent and that he didn't know what he was talking about, but despite this urge to shout at him, something inside me told me that maybe there was something in his words, that I might be missing something that everyone else could see.