1. Dumped because of my size
“What do you think you are doing?” Juliana shrieked in dismay over the loud music blasting out of the speakers.
Juliana had left the bar to look for Eric, her boyfriend. He had left her at the bar for too long. Even doing the number two did not take such a long time. As she peered at the corridor leading towards the washroom, she saw a man leaning against the wall. His hands were all over the woman. The woman had wrapped a leg over the man’s hip.
As the man’s hands ran up the woman’s thigh and under her skirt, Juliana noticed the man’s bracelet. It was the bracelet she had gifted Eric for his birthday!
At her shriek, the couple that were kissing and rubbing their bodies together in a tight embrace quickly broke apart. The woman adjusted her blouse and skirt before turning to look at Juliana. She gave a giggle and covered her smirk with her hand before turning back to look at Eric. After patting Eric on his cheek, she sashayed herself out of the corridor and back to the bar.
“What do you think you are doing?” Juliana repeated harshly as she approached Eric. “Who is she?”
Juliana pointed to the back of the walking woman.
When Eric kept quiet as he adjusted his shirt and jeans, Juliana started hitting Eric on his chest.
“I hate you! I hate you!” Juliana said harshly.
“Look, Juliana, you are way out of line here.”
And when Juliana continued hitting him, Eric stomped his foot angrily.
“Stop it!” He gave a sigh as he grabbed both of Juliana’s hands.
“She is a beautiful and sexy woman. What is wrong with a little kiss? Hmmm?”
Eric dropped Juliana’s hands and started walking out to the bar.
Juliana grabbed him by his shirt.
“What do you mean what is wrong? You are my boyfriend. That means something. We are in a relationship!” Juliana spat at Eric.
“Look at you! Who would want to be in a relationship with you?” Eric looked Juliana up and down. “Look at your fats!”
“You love me! Why are you being so cruel?” Juliana started tearing up.
“Yes, I love you but I am not IN LOVE with you. There is a difference. I enjoy having s*x with you. I enjoy that you make no demands on me, okay? So you better stop making a fuss now.”
Eric started tucking his shirt that Juliana had pulled back into his jeans.
“But you love me. We have been together for two years now. Why are you being like this?” Juliana said, sounding confused.
“Ju, I want someone beautiful and sexy that I can show to the world. Look at you……..fat, frumpy. Ever wonder why we don’t go out much?” Eric lowered his face to Juliana’s face.
“It is because of how you look,” Eric said in a loud whisper. “Ugly!”
Juliana took an involuntary step back as she gasped. Her eyes welled up with tears.
“Let us call it quits,” Eric said as he turned and walked towards the bar. “This is not working for us.”
“Wait, Eric! Wait, please!” Juliana hurried after Eric.
“I am sorry…..I was just upset seeing you kissing that woman,” Juliana pleaded as she hurried to catch up with Eric.
Suddenly Eric turned. Juliana walked smack into his body, his hard-muscled body.
“We are over. I don’t want you anymore.” Eric said in a loud voice.
Juliana looked around her. The patrons of the pub seated nearby stopped talking and turned to look at them. The music was still playing loudly but Juliana was sure the patrons were aware of what was happening. Teardrops spilled out of Juliana's eyes every time she blinked.
“Take care, Ju. I will drop by some time to clear my stuff from your apartment.”
Those were Eric’s parting words to her before he walked out of the pub.
With tears streaming down her cheeks, Juliana shuffled slowly to the bar. She tried to chase after Eric but her legs had a mind of their own. They would not move. Her handbag was still on the counter. Juliana could feel her heart beating so fast in her chest. Her breath was coming out in heaves. She tried to pick up her handbag but her hands were shaking.
“Have a seat, love. Drink this.”
She looked up to see that the bartender had placed a glass of liquid in front of her.
“On the house,” he said before turning to his other customers.
Juliana pulled herself up on the bar stool. She held the cup with both hands.
What just happened? How did Eric become the wronged party when he was the one who cheated?
Juliana picked up the glass and downed the liquid in one gulp. She coughed as the liquid burned as it flowed down her throat. Whiskey!
She placed the glass on the counter top and looked at the bartender. She lifted her finger to signal for another shot.
With every shot of whiskey that she swallowed, Juliana felt more and more disgusted with herself.
Was she so desperate for love that she allowed herself to be door mat to Eric?
Was she so desperate that she was satisfied to simply receive scraps from Eric?
Where was her pride?
"Don't you love yourself?" She heard the question Diane, her best friend, asked her a while back.
Diane had started worrying when Juliana withdrew into a world made up of only Eric and Juliana. Juliana stopped meeting up with friends, stopped dressing up. Basically, Juliana just stayed home when she was not working.
“Yes, I love myself……very much,” Juliana whispered to herself as she drank another glass of whiskey.
Tears flowed down Juliana’s cheeks as she sobbed, “Of course I love myself.”
Juliana stood up unsteadily. She placed some bills on the table and picked up her purse. She walked wobbly towards the exit of the pub. Juliana had to stretch out her hand to hold the wall as she walked. Everything was swaying and she was starting to see two of everything.
“You bastard! You are going to regret dumping me!” Juliana repeatedly mumbled aloud as she made her way out of the pub.
A few men that she passed by took a step back when they heard her swearing.
As Juliana stepped on the pavement, she took a deep shaky breath of the cool night air. It helped calm her fast-beating heart a little.
Juliana looked around. Which way should she go? She could not make up her mind, right or left? Or should she cross the street?
She decided to turn left and walk. After taking a few steps, the world started spinning. She felt warm hands grip her elbows to hold her as she sank down to her knees. She leaned back against the outer wall of the pub.
Juliana peered through half-closed eyes. She could not make out who this person holding her elbow was. He was kneeling beside her and was pushing her hair away from her face.
“I am going to make him regret dumping me. I am going to be so beautiful that it hurts whenever he looks at me. He’s a bastard, Right?” Juliana shouted at the shadow in front of her.
Then hugging her purse to her chest, Juliana pulled her knees to her chest. She rested her head on her knees and closed her eyes.
“So angry…..” Juliana mumbled beneath her breath. Something warm was placed over her body. It shielded her against the cool night breeze.
Juliana squinted open an eye. The shadow was still there.
“Eric is that you? I am going to make you hurt so much. That is a promise!”
When Juliana suddenly swung a punch blindly towards the shadow, she heard a sound of ‘oof’.
Juliana closed her eyes and mumbled, “Not sorry” and promptly went to sleep on the sidewalk.
