Never Free

Nathan Cantu looked down at the little girl sleeping peacefully in her bed. He loved Xochi as if she was his own daughter, but knew he couldn’t back out of the promises he had made. This little girl was about to be his payment for past debts, and it was breaking his heart in a million pieces. He cursed the night he met Norton Walton so many years ago. He had made an ill-fated bet and lost. The wager a silly one, but the debt to be collected at a future date. At the time, it seemed so harmless. His youth prevented him from seeing all the ways it could bite him from behind. Years had passed and Nathan had almost forgotten of the debt. That is until Norton’s widow came looking to collect the debt. Payment or death were the terms established. They seemed dramatic and stupid in youth. Now, they seemed like torture to him. Amber Walton wanted Xochi, the eldest daughter to one of the most powerful packs; daughter to Eliza Moon, a ridiculous strong shifter, and Nathan’s Alpha. If he didn’t deliver Xochi, he would have to pay with his life, and Nathan had discovered he wasn’t ready to lose his life quite yet. He felt like a coward choosing to give into Amber’s demands instead of facing death head-on, but it wasn’t enough to change his mind. He had planned it out perfectly. Tonight would give him the perfect cover. Eliza had refused to meet with the Shaw pack. She had refused to parade her children and the Shaw pack had taken it as an insult. Wolves were a prideful lot and just as Nathan had predicted, they had come around looking for a fight. So, while the Moon Pack's Alpha, Dakota, and the rest of the pack took care of putting the Shaw pack in their place, he would sneak off, take Xochi to Amber, and no one would suspect him. He would be around to breathe for another day. But he hesitated now as he watched the small raven-haired girl sleeping, her older brother also asleep next to her. He knew he could take her without waking the boy, with no one ever knowing, but he loved her. This little girl had wrapped him around her finger the moment she first said his name, the first time her golden eyes had happily watched him walk into a room. This small girl loved him as much as he loved her. But did he love her more than his own life, he asked himself. Unfortunately for Xochi, the answer didn’t go in her favor. Nathan quietly pulled the covers back off of Xochi and swooped her up into his arms. The girl instinctively snuggled into the familiar scent of Nathan. How many times had he picked her up, in the same way, to carry her into bed after falling asleep on her playroom floor? With a feather touch, he opened the bedroom door and poked his head out to make sure the coast was clear. Once confirmed, he made his way through the lavish corridors of the Moon packhouse, keeping himself as close to the dark shadows the night provided. He made a beeline to one of the back exits of the house and, once outside, used his knowledge of the area to walk the sleeping girl a distance to a waiting car. The Cheshire-like grin Amber Walton gave Nathan when she saw him curdled his blood. He instantly regretted his decision, but before Nathan could back out, Amber nodded to one of her lackeys. An enormous wolf with meaty hands placed a blanket around the girl that Nathan had stolen from the Shaw pack and took her from Nathan’s arms. Nathan watched as the man carried her to the back seat of the car and placed her in it carefully. “You did well, Nathan. You can consider your debt paid,” Amber smiled, her green eyes shining. “You will treat her well, right,” he asked, panic making his voice brittle. “Oh, of course. She will be treated like a queen,” Amber beamed. Nathan felt a stone form in his stomach at her overly sweet tone. But he couldn’t think of how to stop any of this now that he had handed the girl over to Amber. His heart shattered as he watched the widowed Luna load up in the small nondescript car and drive off with Xochi. What had he done, he asked himself over and over again. He asked himself that same question as he returned to the house, as he heard his pack return from their fight with the Shaw pack. But it wasn’t until the next morning when Xochi’s absence was noticed that Nathan understood the impact of his horrible decision. Nathan felt like he was outside his body as he watched the day unfold. The Alpha and Luna had their best trackers try to follow Xochi’s scent, but the stolen Shaw blanket hadn’t just sent them in the wrong direction like Nathan had thought would happen. No. It had unleashed the unholy fury of a desperate mother onto the Shaw pack. Even though Eliza was heavy with child, she mercilessly ended the Shaw pack, all in search of her child. No one could stop her, no one could contain her. She plowed through each one like they were mere tigs to be snapped. Nathan knew his Luna was powerful, but this was like nothing he had ever seen. She was pure fury, with no sense, no mercy. And it wasn’t until every last one laid at her feet in pieces, did she finally stop. That was the day he stopped eating and sleeping. His appetite diminished by the thought of all the lives that were slaughtered so that he could live one more day so that he could pay his debt to Walton. His sleep was plagued by his broken heart and the haunting wails of a mother who lost her child. The guilt ate away at him and it wasn’t too long later that he resembled a specter, all ashen and withered away. The pack blamed the loss of Xochi as the culprit to Nathan’s diminished state. When Eliza came to him one evening to try to get him to eat, Nathan, still in bed, only turned his back to his Luna and softly cried. She begged and pleaded, but Nathan ignored her pained pleas. It wasn’t long after that visit that Nathan was buried in the pack’s plot. Eliza claimed that Nathan loved Xochi so much that he died of a broken heart when she was taken. She never knew that Nathan had died of guilt.