Ever Cynical

Chapter 13- Kieran's Struggle

Kieran POV

I was going to murder them all. Anyone alive that had mistreated her. Ri'dubh, as primal as he was, had ironically been more calm than me most of the time, and this was the first time I was struggling to hold him back. The worst part wasn't even that something awful had happened to her, it was how normal she thought it was. I didn't dare tell her that some of her captors had probably been the ones to figure out how we could be killed. I could just tell she'd feel guilty.

"Alpha, I'm not trying to be an ass but you need to calm down." Lugh said. I growled at him. "Please, you need to let Luna tell her story so she feels safe to accept you." Was he actually trying to use his Gamma charm on me? I wanted to laugh, but the attempt certainly made me realize I needed to let her have this. I took a deep breath, my claws retracting along with Ri'dubh. "Go ahead, Luna, tell us the rest." Anais' eyes never left mine as she took a shuddering breath and continued.

Anais POV

"About four hundred years ago I was found by strong vampires in Italy. I was going by the name of Isabeau at the time. They captured me and took me to their king, who goes by the name Donato d'Este." At their shocked gasps, I knew they'd at least heard of, if not met him. I sighed. "He was fascinated by what he thought was an immortal human. He expected me to become his personal feeding bag." This time, the growl came from all of them. Anyone involved with vampires knew that they did not just drink from their "blood bags." They f**k them, and not exclusively most of the time. When I raised my eyebrow, they blushed and looked away. "I appreciate your concern, but remember this was quite a long time ago. Obviously, I declined his offer. He was just... disappointed that I did not accept. He locked me up and threatened to kill my family, which he did not realize was already dead." Sean raised his hand like a kid in school. Precious. "Yes, Sean?"

"I'm just wondering how your family was not, well, like us? Most of us can trace our history back to a particular wolf pack in Ireland. It's odd that your family seemed to be normal humans." The others nodded. I tapped my chin. There had been no indication from the family that raised me, even as they were dying, that I had been adopted, but it would certainly make more sense, given that I was not human like they had been.

"I've made inquiries among supernatural communities, but none of them heard of an immortal human. That's probably where I went wrong, thinking I was human to begin with. Had I said wolf, maybe their answers would have changed? I can't help but think at least some were trying to block my knowledge, though. It's just a feeling. Especially after my run-in with the alpha king."

At my words, Kieran once again looked like he was going to explode.

As numb as I was to all these things, it was probably exceedingly difficult to listen to, as a mate and alpha.

Kieran POV

I was hanging on by a thread. I had not expected her to trust us with so much information, and I was struggling to rein in all of my emotions, the main one being rage. I was not generally an angry guy, and this wave of aggression was so unexpected I wasn't quite sure how to keep it under wraps. My wolf, typically bizarrely calm for an alpha, was equally rage-filled.

Ever so carefully, I spoke.

"Run-in?" I gritted my teeth as I spoke. For the first time, Anais looked a little nervous. That bastard better not have actually laid his hands on her. The man was notoriously lascivious. I was amazed his mate managed to survive the amount of betrayal pain he slung her way, though I'd heard she was steadily declining. He had no heir of course, rumor being that she'd lost all of her pups to betrayal pain. The way he treated his mate and his bond was beyond disgusting. I could not understand how he could not just keep it in his pants. Anais sighed.

"Yeah, three hundred years ago. I'd gone to him to do research into my situation. Maybe there was some old legend somewhere that was relevant, you know? But Alpha King Ludolf Von Dietingen obviously thinks females are placed in front of him to be consumed. He never took my request seriously, and after four days waiting to be allowed in the library, I had gone to his office to push for access. Outside his door I could hear him planning to lock me away and... have his way with me, whether I wanted it or not. The men in the room with him laughed. Laughed! Well, I got away that night, and he put a bounty out for me. It might even still be out there, though at that time I was going by Simone. So far, neither Donato or Ludolf have realized they were seeking the same person, since their relationship is strained." I held my head in my hands, and as I raised it to look at her, I knew she was looking into Ri'dubh's sad eyes.

"I'm sorry I failed you, my Luna." His voice was raspy and pain-filled, utter grief in what happened to her on the surface. The guilt we both felt seemed insurmountable. How could we ever make it up to her? She jumped up and slammed her hands on my desk, leaning forward until her face was just inches from mine.

"Don't you dare try to take responsibility! You weren't even born yet! I would bet the moon goddess knew exactly what she was doing every step of the way, whether I like it or not. You cannot bear this cross for me." She said to me, eyes flashing with anger and a hint of regret. I was well aware the last thing she wanted was to make me feel unworthy, but I could not help my reaction. "All you can do is support me from today on, okay?" She lifted her hand and stroked my hair. I closed my eyes.

"Fine. Go on." I sighed, trying to resign myself to the fact that her history was exactly that... history. It could not be changed, as much as I heartily wished that it could. She was right, the only thing I could fix was the future. Be the best mate and leader I could. Protect them all, come hell or high water.

"Wait, does that mean Donato is looking for you still?" Lugh asked. She nodded. Dammit, this was going to be hard for all of us. I needed her in my pack, mated and marked as soon as possible. It was the only way I could keep those monsters away from her. Vampires notoriously slept with their blood bag humans. They both wanted her, though I could not blame them. She was a rare beauty.

That did not make their behavior any less reprehensible.

"Sorry, there are so many details I left that one out." I just nodded, bracing myself for additional waves of anger. "Gosh I'm really bringing you all more trouble, huh?" Her shoulders slumped, and I could sense how distraught she was to think about bringing danger to our people. "At least the Dragon King and Kitsune Queen are my friends," She huffed. I quirked a brow. "I spent some time with them both. Sadly, after their kindness, I was sort of expecting vampires and wolves to be the same, but I quickly learned how wrong I'd been to assume." It was a relief to know she had some allies as well. Kitsune and Dragons alike rarely left their homes, but they were both fiercely loyal, and I had no doubt they would help us if Ludolf or Donato came for us. "After my run-in with Ludolf, I came to the States. I've been a nomad ever since. I make sure to fake my records- have done since my first death- so humans don't get wind of my... gifts. They are worse than shifters, though the idea of being made a slave, especially for s*x, is highly disturbing." She was quiet for a moment, and I realized I had best inform her of our two weaknesses.

I closed my eyes briefly and took a deep breath. This was going to hurt her. As tough as she was, it was clear she had a soft spot for those in danger or being mistreated.

"Anais, we can be killed for real." Her shocked eyes jumped to mine. "There are only two ways, and the likelihood that you'll run across this is slim, but I think you should at least know." She nodded. "First, a witch can seal your power to regenerate, but it must be sealed along with your wolf, and then your heart must be removed by a silver blade and melted down in a vat of silver before the seal breaks. The seal only works for two hours, and requires the blood of a non-Immortal wolf and vampire to create it. How they figured this out, I don't think I want to know." She flinched, and I knew she realized her own torture had played a factor. "The other way is pretty simple. Once we are fully mated, if one of us is killed unnaturally, we become fully human with no special ability. In that form, any standard method could be used, but we could die within a few days of losing our mate, anyway, if the bond is strong." Her eyes filled with tears and I pulled her close, onto my lap.

She pushed her face into my neck this time, breathing deeply of my scent. I was momentarily distracted by the realization that she had already scented me, even without her first shift. Tingles ran down my spine from where her nose drifted along my neck. Soon she'd be sitting on firm evidence of just how much I wanted my Luna. I tried to refocus on the situation at hand before the mate bond had me completely distracted. Anais needed me to support her, and just as I'd expected, she was hurt by both the knowledge that we were not infallible and that the experimentation she'd been forced into had aided such acts.

Her pure heart hated to think she was responsible for the deaths of her own people.

"You are absolutely not ever allowed to die, you hear me?" She whispered into my hair, stroking my back. "I know we just met but I know I can't lose you. I just can't."