Let go emotional bonding

In detachment lies the wisdom of uncertainty...in the wisdom of uncertainty lies the freedom from our past, from the known, which is the prison of past conditioning. And in our willingness to step into the unknown, the field of all possibilities, we surrender ourselves to the creative mind that orchestrates the dance of the universe. Deepak Chopra Bonding through dependence never works, whereas bonding through freedom always does. Shirley MacLaine Emotion brings in the dimension of bonding or turning in: An experience that touches your heart makes the meaning that much more personal. Deepak Chopra Life is a tide; float on it. Go down with it and go up with it, but be detached. Then it is not difficult. Prem Rawat Attachment is the great fabricator of illusions; reality can be attained only by someone who is detached. Simone Weil When your desires are strong enough you will appear to possess superhuman powers to achieve. Jose Heavena Fernando CHAPTER 1: ATTACHMENT Have you ever suffered badly after losing/quitting a job you loved? Or after a break-up with your partner? Or maybe after losing a good connection with a very much attached person? Attachment and suffering go hand in hand. What are you most afraid of in life? I asked a friend. Attachment, she answered. We have come to a point where we rightly recognize attachment as the root cause of pain. But, as humans letting go of attachment is nearly impossible as it feels like letting go of life itself. Holding on to pain doesn’t fix anything. Replaying the past over and over again doesn’t change it, and wishing things were different doesn’t make it so. In some cases, especially when it comes to the past, all you can do is accept whatever it is you’re holding on to and then let it go. That’s how everything changes. You have to let go of what is hurting you, even if it feels almost impossible. Deciding to hold on to the past will hold you back from creating a strong sense of self — a self that isn’t defined by your past, but rather by who you want to be. Oddly enough, painful feelings can be comfortable, especially if they’re all you know. Some people have trouble letting go of their pain or other unpleasant emotions about their past because they think those feelings are part of their identity. In some ways, they may not know who they are without their pain. This makes it impossible for them to let go. If there’s one thing we all have in common is that we want to feel happy and on the other side of that coin, we want to avoid hurting. Yet we consistently put ourselves in situations that set us up for pain. We pin our happiness to people, circumstances, things and hold onto them for a lovable life. We stress about the possibility of losing them when something seems amiss. Then we melt into grief when something changes - a layoff or a breakup. We attach to feelings as if they define us and ironically with not only just positive ones. If you’ve wallowed in regret or disappointment for years, it can seem safe and even comforting to suffer. In trying to hold on to what’s familiar, we limit our ability to experience joy in the present. A moment can’t possibly radiate fully when you’re suffocating it in fear. When you stop trying to grasp, own and control the world around you, you give it the freedom to fulfil you without the power to destroy you. That’s why letting go is so important - letting go is letting happiness in. Giving a person, a relationship, a dream, a goal – the power to control you in such a way that without it you cannot imagine your existence can have drastic effects. But is it supposed to be like this? Are we to spend our lives in attaching ourselves to mortal things and suffer when we are left without it? This is where the concept of detached attachment comes into the picture. CHAPTER 2: DETACHMENT What do you mean by the Detached attachment? Detached Attachment is when you let go of control and allow your possessions to come and pass. You are not the owner but a caretaker. Appreciate, while it belongs to you and when the time comes; let go as if it was never meant for you. Like in The Bhagavad Gita Krishna tells Arjuna that acting with detachment means doing the right thing for its own sake, because it needs to be done, without worrying about success or failure. Detachment takes practice. You need to work on it day by day to instil it in your life. “ Detachment does not mean not caring. It means caring for yourself first and letting others take responsibility for their actions without trying to save or punish them.” My point is very clear to involve yourself in the moment. Live, laugh, love, enjoy. Do whatever you want, but at this moment. After you are finished just detach yourself from everything. Detaching yourself from the world around you will give you immense strength to hold eternal happiness. Otherwise, you will be in distress forever. Maintain neutrality in your nature, behaviour, and character. Don’t get too close to someone. Don’t get too emotional about everything. Dwelling in your past won’t rectify the mistakes you made or if you are cherishing those golden memories you had once are not going to recreate again. And the same applied to the future also, peeping into your future and dreaming about it is just a waste of your time. We have only the present, make maximum use of it. Be like a lotus to sail in the wave of life CHAPTER 3: EMOTIONAL CORD-CUTTING We are all connected to the people in our lives on an emotional and energetic level, and every time we interact with these people we exchange energy. These energetic and emotional cords are not restricted by space or time, meaning you can be connected to someone who is far away or someone from your past. It is necessary to have some ties in every relationship, but some are beneficial while others are destructive. During our everyday interactions with our partners, friends, siblings, parents, children, and colleagues we exchange energy, and within these interactions, there are likely to be times where we feel hurt, betrayed, judged, misunderstood, insulted, etc. Quite often we are not aware of how much energy we spend on these experiences, which can provoke feelings of fear, anger, and resentment within us. If we don’t resolve these feelings then we continue to leak energy and perpetuate these negative patterns. What is a cord? When you establish a significant relationship with someone (of any kind), you form an energetic cord with that person, which contains all the negative patterns and dynamics of your relationship. You contribute negative patterns into that cord, and the other person does too. Those patterns of emotion, thought and behaviour circulate in the cord – it is connected to your aura, so the energies enter your aura continuously and affect you subconsciously in a variety of ways. Cords don’t just drain your energy. They send negative patterns back and forth between you both, and into your aura. Traumas can circulate in them, leaving you feeling haunted by them (for want of a better word). They can also cause you to choose relationships and experiences that you wouldn’t otherwise because they predispose you to act in a certain way. What happens when you cut a cord? When you cut a negative cord, you are cleansing the negative behavioural, emotional, and mental patterns that circulate between you and the other person. If the cordee is still alive, then your relationship can improve as a result. If the cordee is dead or you are not in contact, then it becomes a lot easier to put the negative aspects (and thoughts) of that particular relationship behind you. Emotional cords are formed on a subconscious level, and severing them is a useful way to clear past experiences, get rid of resentments, and stop repeating old patterns. Cutting the cord does not necessarily sever the relationship unless that is the intent, rather it puts the relationship back onto a healthy path. Cutting cords is useful for: ● Ridding your life of someone that you no longer want in it. ● Enabling yourself to be free and move forwards after a break-up. ● When you wish to maintain the relationship but it has become unhealthy. ● When you are transitioning to a new phase in your life and have some things to let go of. Why do we need to cut the cords? When you have some kind of attachment to another person, an energetic cord can form between you. You can have energy cords connecting you to family members, lovers, friends, exes, coworkers, and even people you’ve met briefly or don’t know personally at all (think celebrities). People can send you cords and you don’t even know it! These energy cords can become a huge drag, particularly when they hold negative energy. If you have a cord attached to someone you judge, resent or need to forgive, these cords can bring you down big time. If there’s someone you’re hung up on or long to see again, like an ex, a former friend, a person you burned a bridge with, or even a fling you still obsess over, then you almost certainly have an energetic cord keeping you tied to them. This attachment can feel like an immense weight and you don’t even know where it’s coming from! But here are the relationships that usually have a lot of impact when you cut a cord to that person: ● Cutting cords to close relatives, such as parents, children or siblings can make a significant impact on your emotions. ● When you have a cord to someone close to you who has (or has had) an addiction, it can help to cut the cord to that relationship. ● Cutting cords to abusers and bullies can be impactful. ● Cutting cords to someone you’ve had a difficult break up with can also be helpful. ● Cutting cords to a current spouse or partner can be helpful too, especially if you are having difficulties in the relationship. YOU CAN CUT CORDS WITH PEOPLE YOU LOVE, TOO The cord-cutting meditation isn’t just for people who are no longer in your life or who you wish weren’t in your life. In fact, many of these energetic cords likely lead to people you care for very deeply. By practising this meditation you’re not cutting this person out of your life. You’re simply cutting the energetic cord that transmits negative energy. You can even cut a cord that’s positive but feels too needy. For instance, maybe you have an awesome friendship but you know you depend a little too much on this person. Cut the cord and restore health and ease to the relationship! How the cord-cutting meditation works... For the practice of cord-cutting, you sit comfortably, close your eyes, slow your breathing, and get into a meditative state. Once you feel a sense of calmness come over you, you invite in any type of guide you believe in, whether that’s angels, God, your inner wisdom, or the Universe. I like to invite Archangel Michael, the protector, a powerful angelic being who carries a huge golden sword. In my mind’s eye, I invite Michael to cut that cord for me. You can welcome in Archangel Michael or any other being or presence who can cut cords on your behalf. Ask him to go down that list, slicing through those cords with ease. Say to Michael or whatever presence you invite in: “I ask you to cut these cords now.” When you do this, you’ll feel a sense of peace and a great deal of support. When you practice this meditation regularly, you’ll feel happier and healthier, like a weight has been lifted. CHAPTER 4: EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUE The Emotional Freedom Technique, or EFT, is the psychological acupressure technique most highly recommended to optimize your emotional health. Although it is still often overlooked, emotional health is absolutely essential to your physical health and healing — no matter how devoted you are to the proper diet and lifestyle, you will not achieve your body's ideal healing and preventative powers if emotional barriers stand in your way. People who use this technique believe tapping the body can create a balance in your energy system and treat pain. According to its developer, Gary Craig, a disruption in energy is the cause of all negative emotions and pain. Though still being researched, EFT tapping has been used to treat people with anxiety and people with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).