My Jaded Love, Dangerous Desires

5

Oli POV

“I think I got friend-zoned.”

I slump down into the leather chair in the suite of my hotel room.

Max is lounging on the sofa flicking through the tv channels.

“By the barmaid?”

“Cait!” I correct him.

“And yes. I don’t know what to do, Max.”

I run my hand through my hair, thoroughly frustrated with myself.

If I hadn't seen her then I could have gone through the rest of my life in the dark haze I was living in, but now that I’ve seen her, spoken to her, and touched her, I can’t go back to the darkness.

She is my light.

“How long did you two date?”

He turns the tv off and looks at me now, his face serious.

“We have been friends for as long as I can remember. We started dating when she turned sixteen and it lasted for two and a half years. I thought she would be the one person I would spend the rest of my life with. She was it for me.”

“So what happened then?” He asks.

“I happened! I fücked it up like everything else. She walked in on me with another girl. The thing is, I was so out of it that I didn’t even realize what I was doing. I have no recollection of even talking to that girl. All I remember is Cait standing there looking at me in bed with some girl laying on top of me. I’ve not seen her since that day. When we got here, that was the first time in 8 years that I'd seen her.”

Max let out a deep breath.

“Do you still love her?”

“I never stopped loving her.”

He leans back against the sofa now, resting his head against the cushion.

“Well, that explains why I can’t get you to stay in a committed relationship. How does she feel? Have you spoken to her?”

“Like I said, I think I was friend-zoned.”

“I wish I knew what to say. This is all down to you now, Oliver. I hope you can figure it out.”

He stands up and grabs the gym bag he brought in with him.

“I’m going to the gym. You wanna come?”

I nod my head and grab my stuff. Working out this frustration will be better than stewing in self-pity.

As I get off the elevator, I spot her behind the front desk.

She looks up and smiles at me, then continues with what she was doing.

She looks like a goddess, the way her eyes sparkle in the light and the way her hair sways as she moves.

God, I wish I could just go over there and tell her what she means to me, but I’m too afraid. If I tell her, she might push me away again and I’m not prepared for that.

The gym at the hotel is just a standard gym with a few machines and some weights.

I really push myself during the workout, letting all my feelings and frustration out on the equipment.

Wishing I could go back in time and stop myself from making the worst mistake I’ve ever made.

Thinking back to that night makes my stomach twist into a giant knot.

It weighs me down and reminds me of how worthless I really am.

How could I have let that happen?

I knew from the first moment I met Cait that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her, so why did I let this happen?

Why did I take her trust and throw it away like it meant nothing to me?

“Hey sorry to interrupt, but there’s a phone call for you.”

Cait’s voice comes from the door.

I turn to look at her.

She has popped her head through the door and is looking at Max.

“Oh, it will be about that ball.”

He jumps up but stops.

“Can you please keep an eye on him for me? He has a tendency to overdo it on the machines and I can’t have him hurt.”

He asks Cait whilst pointing to me.

She nods, but doesn’t look too happy.

She walks in, looking around at the equipment and avoiding looking at me.

“So you’ve been here a while now. Aren’t you exhausted?” She asks, touching one of the machines. She looks at it as if it’s the most interesting thing in the world.

“I was just finishing up.”

I pick my water bottle up and squirt some into my mouth.

It dribbles down my vest, soaking me.

“I don’t blame you. I wouldn’t have lasted an hour.” She chuckles, turning to look at me now.

Her eyes go big as she scans my body.

“So a ball?”

She turns around and starts to play with a different machine, dropping some of the smaller pieces for it and then trying to catch them.

She bends down and quickly scoops them up, placing them back on the machine and acting as if she hadn’t just done that.

I can’t help smiling at her.

“I’m not sure. Max tells me what to do and I do it.”

The door opens up and Max strolls in, looking pissèd.

“I'll see you later then,” Cait rushes towards the door.

“Wait!” Max shouts.

Cait stops and turns to look at Max.

“Do you know where we can get a tux? It’s an actual ball.”

Max looks at me and winks, making me shake my head at him.

I have two tuxedos upstairs that he made me bring with us for the ball.

I’m curious as to what he is up to, though.

I fold my arms across my chest and watch as it all plays out in front of me.

“Yeah, I can give you the names of some places.”

She goes to walk out again, but Max stops her again.

“Wait. I’m sorry to be that guy, but do you think you could help Oliver out? I know that you are friends and he could really use some female prescriptive, and I’m busy all week now with making some of the arrangements. I don’t know when I will have time to go and I can’t trust him to go alone. I mean, you know what he’s like. He will just pick anything.”

“It’s fine. She doesn’t have to.”

“Sure.”

We both say at the same time.

I look up at her, then back to Max.

“Perfect. Thank you, Cait.”

He places his hands together and gives her a small bow and turns back to me, flashing me his biggest smile ever and I can’t help smiling back.

“I can take you tomorrow. Will that work?”

I nod, but Max answers for me.

“Excellent, thank you, darling,” he says dramatically.

I roll my eyes at him.

He can be so over the top sometimes.

~~~

Cait POV

When I went to tell the rude man he had a call, I didn’t expect to see Oli working out.

His vest was clinging to his body, making my imagination run wild, his arms bulking.

And his legs looked so strong and firm.

Fück, he was hot.

Even when he’s a sweaty mess, he looks sexy.

The way the sweat made him glisten under the lights made him look like an Adonis.

It took every ounce of willpower I had to look away from him, but even then my body betrayed me and kept giving in to the urge to look at him.

“I can take you tomorrow. Will that work?” I ask, agreeing to take him tux shopping.

Shít, why did I do that?

I try to avoid looking at him because I know my body is going to betray me again.

If he sees me checking him out, he’s going to know I’m not over him yet and that’s bad.

It was 8 years ago. I should be over him now.

I walk back towards the front desk reassuring myself that everything will be ok, that me and Oli can be friends and spend some time together, alone.

I can hear Mikayla behind the desk checking some new guests in.

Word has started to spread that Oli is staying here, and it’s starting to get booked up.

The two women are looking around, their eyes scanning the foyer, trying to see if they can spot him.

I feel the tang of jealousy thinking of women throwing themselves at Oli. I hate the thought of him with someone else and I hate myself for feeling like that.

“If you need anything, just call down.”

Mikayla slides the key card across the desk to them, but they don’t leave.

“Actually, is it true that Oliver Wilson is staying here?”

A platinum blonde asks, looking at both of us now.

“I’m sorry we can’t give out that kind of information.”

Mikayla smiles back at them with the fakest smile she can muster. They pick up their bags, flashing a dirty look at me and Mikayla, and walk towards the elevator.

“So you have the big date tonight with Justin,” she states, turning to me.

“Huh what? Oh crap, I forgot.”

Now I feel terrible.

Mikayla laughs loudly at me. Who forgets she’s arranged a date?

Me, that’s who.

The girl with her head in the clouds.

“No worries, I'll hook you up sister.” She says, making me roll my eyes and shake my head at her.

“Hello, what can I do for you, sir?” She politely asks, making me turn to see who she’s talking to.

I felt my cheeks heating up when I see Oli, and he probably just heard I’ve got a date.

His face is set in a scowl.

He doesn’t look happy at all and it’s making my stomach twist in knots, knowing he’s upset.

What the fück is wrong with me?

Why should it matter if I have a date? He has moved on probably countless times.

Maybe that’s the problem. I hate that he has moved on and I’m stuck in the past still.

“I was wondering what time tomorrow?”

He doesn’t look at me, he looks off to the side more at Mikayla.

“I can pick you up at 10,” I say, holding my head high.

“Ok.”

His voice is flat and dead of emotion, making my stomach drop.

He turns, abruptly walking away.

You can see the tension in his back and feel the cold coming from him.

He hits the button for the elevator and I watch as the doors slide shut, his eyes quickly glancing at me just before they did.

“What’s his problem?” Mikayla says with her sassy attitude that I’ve grown to love.

She has an attitude just as fiery as her hair.

I just shrugged, the feeling in my stomach intensifying, making me want to throw up.

After agreeing to let Mikayla help me get ready for my date, I’m finally ready.

We ended up drinking half a bottle of wine though, and I’m feeling slightly tipsy.

I didn’t see Oli for the rest of the day and it actually upset me.

I found myself looking for him every time the elevator opened up or wishing it was him calling down for something.

I really need to give myself a reality check.

That boy broke my heart and kicked it to the curb.

I shouldn’t be looking for him at every turn or getting excited about seeing him.

I should be furious with him for waltzing back into my life and flipping it upside down, not feeling upset that he’s upset or worried because he heard I had a date.

“Ok, I’m ready,” I say, walking out of my bedroom.

I have on a burgundy off-the-shoulder dress.

It flares out at the skirt and reaches just above my knees. The neckline goes straight across, so the arms are in line with that.

It’s actually one of my favorite dresses.

I paired it with some stilettos in the same color and a choker necklace.

“Perfect. God Cait, you are gorgeous.” She says, twirling her finger around, so I will do a twirl. Mikayla makes a wolf whistle noise, making me laugh.

KNOCK KNOCK

“Have fun.” She says, pushing me towards the door.

“Remember to lock the door,”

I say as I open it.

Justin is standing with a bunch of flowers, holding them out towards me.

They almost hit me in the face.

“Thank you,” I say, leaning back and taking them.

I lift them up towards my nose, smelling the pleasant fragrance. I place them by the front door, Mikayla giving me a thumbs up to let me know she will put them into some water and off I go.

I have to admit a part of me was hoping it was someone else standing at my door tonight, and I hate myself for feeling like this. I feel so confused, my head and my heart at war with one another.

Oli broke my heart and I’m acting like it was nothing, like he didn’t sleep with someone else, that it was just a small disagreement we had.

Justin was the perfect gentleman to begin with, opening my car door and closing it, but it just didn’t feel right.

I found his conversation to be boring, or he just didn’t care to put any effort into it.

I had to force the conversation at some points and it made it awkward.

I felt horrible because maybe it’s my fault, maybe it’s because my mind just wasn’t in it tonight.

Or maybe it’s because every second I’m with Justin, I was wishing it was someone else sitting opposite me.

“So, how do you know the actor?” He asks.

He gets a giant chunk of steak on his fork and puts it into his mouth.

He chews with his mouth open, bits of meat falling out, and a strange noise coming from him.

“Oh, we grew up together. He lived next door. We actually dated for a bit.” I reply, taking a sip of my drink, mentally slapping myself for mentioning dating Oli. Now he’s going to ask more questions.

“Really. Wow, how long did you date for?”

As he talks, a piece of meat flies out of his mouth and hits me on my face.

I wiped it off with my napkin, unimpressed.

He doesn’t seem to care though and continues to eat.

“I don’t want to talk about that. Tell me about you instead.”

He looks at me and shrugs.

“Not much to tell, really.”

He shovels another fork full of steak into his mouth.

I feel like I should be cutting it up for him so he doesn’t choke.

“How do you find working at the hotel?” I ask, trying to keep the conversation away from me.

“It’s ok, I didn’t intend on working there forever but for now I enjoy it.” He says, smiling at me.

His smile doesn’t excite me like Oli’s.

It actually looks a little creepy with all the food inside his mouth.

“Why did you break up?” I sigh and put my fork down onto my plate.

As I look up, I spot Oli and Max across the bar watching me. His eyes are fixated on our table and a smirk plays across his face. Justin looks over his shoulder, noticing him as well, and turns to smile at me once more.

“You wanna make him jealous?” He asks, reaching across the table to hold my hand.

I look down at him, pulling my hand from underneath his.

I quickly looked back at Oli to see his eyes furrowed together as he glared at the back of Justin’s head.

“No, I don’t want to make him jealous, Justin. Can we talk about something different?”

He nods his head, glancing back over his shoulder with a smirk.

“Who dumped who?”

I roll my eyes and throw my napkin down on the table.

“I’m going. Thank you for tonight, Justin. I will see you at work on Monday.”

I grab my coat and head for the door.

“Don’t even think about it,”

I say as I walk past Oli, his smile bigger than the cat that caught the mouse. He holds his hands up in defense.

I pull my coat around myself as I head towards the taxi, just dropping off some people jumping inside and heading home.