Love From A Distance

Chapter 16 Closing Time

Millicent's POV

I speed away from my house in my car as if my life depends on it.. Maybe my life doesn't depend on it but right now my sanity does.

I get my phone and dialing Dr.Jones number. It rings a couple of times before his assistant answers. "Monarch Therapy.. this is Andrea speaking, how may I help you?"

"Hi.. yes.. this is Millicent Landly and I was wondering if there were any openings today for me to be able to see Dr.Jones." I state nervously.

"Um.. well we're pretty much done for the day.. he is in his office finishing a bunch of paperwork and he has requested to not be disturbed.. I don't know if he would be willing to take any more sessions today.. but we could always set you up for bright and early in the morning." she replies pretty quickly but this doesn't work for me.. I need help now.

"I'm really sorry to bother you, I really am.. but I am having a rough day and I really need to talk with someone.. please." I practically beg of her as I can hear her letting out a sigh.

"Ok I'll go interrupt him for you and see if I can convince him, but there is no guarantee ok?" She asks giving me a jump start into my heart, making me feel better about her attempt for me.

"Yes thank you so much." I reply pretty quickly as she responds just as quickly. "Ok please hold and I'll be right back." She says as she instantly puts on the instrumental music to entertain me while I wait.

I pull into the open parking lot while I slip into a spot to park. Hoping to get a good result from her trying to help me. I sit here and humm to the familiar song that I can't seem to place just yet. I keep thinking about the music trying to calm down until I hear the music stop as she gets my attention. "Mrs.Landly?" I get excited, jumping at the sound of my name being called. "Yes.. still here."

"You must have caught Dr.Jones on a good day because he is in a good mood and has agreed to your visit.. but you have to be able to get here soon.. we won't wait forever." She warns me as I quickly reply. "I'm already in the parking lot."

"Ok then come on in.. I'll meet you at the doors to let you in." She instructs me as I state. "Yes of course thank you!" I hang up the call as I get out of the car with my things and headed straight to the front doors. I can see through the glass doors that she is waiting for me as I wave to make sure she knows it's me.

She smirks at me as she unlocks the doors and I slip through the small gap given for my entrance. "Thank you so much." I make sure she knows how much I appreciate them going out of their way for me.

She smiles and leads me to his door before knocking on it while she slowly cracks it open. "Dr.Jones.. Mrs.Landly is here to see you." She says now opening the door the rest of the way for me to enter.

"Thanks," I say softly to her now feeling nervous. "Yes of course Mrs.Landly.. I mean Milly.. Good to see you again.. Have a seat." He says pointing his hand at the open couch. I nod automatically as I do exactly as he says, just wanting to get this show on the road.

"Mrs.Stanley thank you so much for your help today.. have a good night with your husband and be sure to tell him happy birthday for me." He instructs his assistant, making her smile big as she exclaims. "Thank you sir.. I will tell him.. see you tomorrow!" You don't have to tell her twice.. she is out of here in the blink of an eye.

"Um.. thank you again Dr.Jones for seeing me." I state to him as he waves his hand looking like it's not an issue whatsoever.

"It's what I'm here for Milly.. and call me Ash or Ashton.. either or is fine." I nod vigorously. "Of course.. Ashton.. I'm just having a rough day and really needed someone to talk to.. I have been feeling like I'm losing my mind." I declare, saying what I probably shouldn't to your therapist.. But I'm here to be honest.

"What has happened?" He asks looking concerned while he takes his pen and notepad into his hands. "Where do I start?" I ask rhetorically, but he answers anyway. "Just start from the beginning.

"Well.. I think it started today when I got home from helping my father out. Everything just felt weird in my house.. like the vibes weren't right.. I don't know how to describe it.. But something felt off.. especially when I entered my room. I found an earing on my side of the room, by my bed, on the windowsill and it looks like an earing I have worn before.. but I'm not completely sure about that." I start off by letting out a deep breath just to suck another one right back in.

"Then Wyatt was pissing me off completely by his disrespectful comments about me and what he thinks I should be doing as a wife.. you know cooking and such.. and it just made me want to punch him in the face. He makes me feel like I'm just something for him to use when he pleases and I won't be used." I spat out at him, as if he is the one using me even though I know he is not.

"Why did he talk about where he thinks you should be?" he asks me as I shrug my shoulders. "He wasn't telling me where I should be.. he was telling me that I should be doing all the cooking.. for his party that he almost forgot to tell me about.. He thinks that I don't need help. He said this when his best friend was offering to help me cook and he almost wouldn't let him just because he says I can do it on my own.. but his friend defended me by saying that just because I can do it alone, doesn't mean I should have to.. plus he threatened to let him just make it without our help and that shut him up completely." I say with pride as I think about that.

"It sounds like you might have some feelings for his best friend." He declares, hitting that nail right on the head, as my mouth opens up to lie and deny, but I can't get myself to. So I sit here for a moment with a look of shock when he adds, "you had a look in your eye that said to me that there are feelings there." He explains to me, causing me to bite my lip with anxiousness filling my senses.

I think to myself for a long moment about the idea of even admitting it or maybe just lying to try to not look bad.. but then I have to remind myself that it's why I'm here is to get this stuff off my chest, to help ease my mind.

"Yes.. I have had very strong feelings for this man and they have been there for a very long time.. I always tried to resist because he is my husband's best friend and such a great man.. But I did something I probably shouldn't have.. I kissed him.. today.. but he kissed me first and it felt so right.. it felt amazing in so many ways.. It was also nice to be wanted and desired.." I explain now fidgeting with my hands on my lap.

"So you're here because of the guilt?" he asks me but I quickly shake my head. "No.. I actually don't regret kissing him as bad as that may sound.. I only regret the fact that I'm still married and kissed him.. I wanted to do that the right way, and kissing him while I'm married to another is not the right way. But I'm done with my husband.. I figured out with that kiss and other things that I'm over my husband and just want to cut this off. I won't beat this dead horse any longer." I reply to him as he asks right away. "You said the kiss and something else caused you to feel that you don't have feelings for your husband.. So.. What else happened to cause these feelings?"

"Well, I saw this girl at our house party, flirting with him.. and it didn't bother me.. it hurt a little by how shameless he was.. But I didn't care because I wanted him, I just cared because it was disrespectful." I explain to him as he nods and writes.

"So there will be a divorce then?" He asks as I nod vigorously. "Yes." He keeps writing as he asks, "I'm assuming you will be going straight for this new man? But I wouldn't recommend it.. You need time for yourself to figure out what you want in life and more importantly what you need after a big change such as this." He explains and it makes sense.

"You're probably right Dr.... I mean Ashton." I say to him as he asks, "Do you feel better to get that off your chest?" He asks as I nod but retort. "Yes but that's not the only reason why I'm here."

"Ok.. then why else." He curiously inquires so I don't leave him hanging. "Ok.. so I kissed Aiden, as I told you.. but when it happened it was just the three of us in the house.. or so I thought." He keeps staring at me in anticipation of what I have to say.

"But when I went to the bathroom I found a sticky note on that gifted jewelry box I told you about the last time.. and it said I was naughty for kissing him." I declare waiting for a reaction. He thinks about this as he says. "It sounds like it might be from the guy you kissed or your husband."

"I thought that too, but I also found another note saying similar things, but I got mad throwing the first two away and showing the 3rd to Aiden.. he at least read that one.. but the other notes are now missing.. I tried to find them to show to Aiden as well and was unsuccessful. The note he read was the only one in the trash and I never threw that one away.. I thought I gave it to Aiden until he told me he didn't have it.. Even the hash pen I was smoking, went missing for a small moment and appeared in an area where I never had it.. I don't think it was me who did this but who else would have done it? my husband thinks it was me and that I'm crazy. I'm tired of feeling like I'm losing my mind. Everyone wants the evidence to prove what I'm saying and I don't have it so now I'm being questioned, and the sad part is I'm starting to believe them." I exclaim to him throwing my hands in the air in disbelief.

"I even punched this girl that insulted me.. she was flirting up a storm with my husband and decided to insult me in the process of trying to make me feel bad, so I punched her.. and believe me I never do anything like that.. things have been crazy because I haven't been myself lately. and I don't know if I'm the problem or not." I explain the rest as he hums and writes more.

Once his pen comes to a stop, he puts the end of it to his lips looking as if he is thinking about how to respond.

"There is nothing wrong with the way you feel.. and maybe stepping out of your box is what you need to do.. you have been walked all over in your marriage and for once it sounds like you're not taking the crap.. as you shouldn't. I think it's good to build boundaries and to make sure to enforce them.. because if you don't respect yourself then who will? But you also have to think logically about the situation. You say that it was just the three of you in the place.. I would place money on the fact that one of them did this. They can deny it all they want but if not them, then who else?" He declares as I nod in understanding.

"It felt really good to be able to stand up for myself but it's hard because it also feels wrong at the same time. Maybe you're right.. I automatically thought it was one of the guys, but they both denied it and I felt like I needed to believe them.. Maybe I just need to keep my eyes open for the signs.. Maybe also I can change things up around my place to try to help out so I don't feel so crazy." I declare in realization.

"Like what?" He asks me looking confused as I retort. "Like security cameras. That could help and if I'm questioning my actions I will have evidence to back up my theory.. showing me what really happened. Whether I like the answer or not."

He agreed with me while he nods. "Do whatever you need to do to help ease your mind. I don't think it would hurt to get cameras.. but they can be expensive to do the security systems. And I know you needed to save money to get out on your own." He warns but I just wave it off. "I don't care.. the price of my sanity is a high one.. you should know," I say to him as he chuckles at my lame joke.

"That I do.. Is there anything else you need to discuss?"