Desire becomes Her

Chapter 12

12

Addison had known her mother would not receive her in the kindest of ways but she expected a little more sympathy than she got. Her mother just ranted on at her in Italian as she walked through the front hall way, dropping the duffle bag and kept walking. "Speak English, Mother. You're in America, not the Italian countryside. You've been here over 30 years." She gave a sigh and sat down on the couch in the living room, placed her son on her lap and let him suck on her finger to keep him quiet.

"I'll speak what I want in my own house, Addison. What trouble have you gotten yourself into now?"

"Trouble? No, ‘where have you been for the last four and a half years, are you okay, whose baby is this?’" She hadn't seen her parents since they had committed her, since before Lucian had taken her from the facility they had locked her up in. "You never change. I don't know what Dad saw in you." she mumbled the insult at her Mom and smiled down at her little boy, who was sucking furiously on her finger and starting to get frustrated that nothing was coming out.

"You've never given me a reason to change, Addison. You're nothing but trouble. You always have been. You can't just show up here and expect me to be helpful." She turned the TV off, crossed her arms and looked at her daughter. Frowning she shook her head. "When was the last time you fed him? You should never have a baby; you can barely take care of yourself. You have no business being a mother. Who's the father? Drug dealer? Some pimp from New York?" She leaned over and took him from her arms and looked at him. She almost smiled but for some reason the nasty scowl kept her from doing so.

Addison ran her hands over her face in frustration and groaned a little bit. "Always thinking the worst of me huh, Mom? Can’t be happy that I’ve come home, that I’m healthy, that I just had a baby; your grandson and you’re the first place I came? And, No, he's not some drug dealer’s baby. His father, Lucian, has businesses all over the world. Well established, rich. I'm sure you'll meet him soon he has a way of finding me.” Her mother just stared at her, didn’t believe that anyone that her daughter was involved with could be anything but trouble.  “Where is Dad? I want to see him.”  She looked up at her mother, whose face dropped at the question.

“Your father died over a year ago, Addison.  He had a stroke.”  Her words were so blunt; it was as if she had punched Addison in the chest.  Nostrils flared as she held back tears but she shook her head and stood up.

“Can you watch him? I need a shower, I feel disgusting…”

"Do I have a choice?"

"Not really." She got up from the couch and walked to the front hall for the duffle bag. She fished out a few things and headed up the stairs. "There's formula in the bag if he's hungry."

"Do I at least get to know my grandson's name?" She shouted up the stairs.

"David Andrew." She slammed the bathroom door and started the water, the steady stream of water covering up her sobs.

Things never changed. She had never gotten along with her mother, and her mother had never been able to get around her daughters resentment for her. She had tried to bring her up right, but the girl just never listened, she had always done what she wanted to do. Always in trouble, always doing things she wasn't supposed to, and now this. Maria sat with her grandson, rocked him, and fed him while Addison showered.  He reminded her very much of her own son, who had been killed in a car accident. She brushed her fingers over his soft hair and watched him as he slept.

 When she was done with her shower she came back down the stairs in a pair of sweats and a t-shirt from high school that she had found in the drawers in the room she still had at her parents’ home and took David from her mother and marched back upstairs. She rolled her eyes as she was shouted at in Italian and only shouted back at her. "I can't understand you, Mother, we're in America." She could, Addison had been first taught Italian before being taught English as a child but had stopped speaking Italian when she got into school, even though her mother had insisted it be the house language.

........

She had not bothered to pull the covers back on her bed, just lay on top of them with an old blanket on top of her. She had set David beside her, between two pillows to keep him safe and was asleep in only a few minutes. The room had not changed since she had left at 18. Posters on the wall, pictures stuffed in the edge of a mirror that hung over her dresser. The dresser held old juvenile mementos. She had been a dancer as a child, a music box with a ballerina on top, a few figurines sat on top.

Having not slept this well in years; always being interrupted by Lucian's unending need to be on her; she dreamed and didn’t move a muscle in the two hours she lay there. But something had made her open her eyes though and she knew who was standing over her. "Don't you dare touch him," She didn't move, only her eyes moved to see Lucifer standing next to the bed. "Where is Lucian?"

"He's speaking with your mother. I think she was surprised to see him. What did you tell her, Addison?" He took her dare and ran his finger over David's cheek and then looked at her, a challenge. “Such a perfect little Prince you have here Addison.”

"Nothing, I didn’t tell her anything. And I said don't touch him. He's not yours. He will never be yours."

"I beg to differ young lady. I have waited for this for a long time. And I will take him whether you like it or not."

She could hear her mother arguing with Lucian as he made his way up the stairs. The door opened and Lucifer was gone. "I came back to visit and they said you had gone hours ago, that you signed AMA papers and got into a cab. What the f**k is wrong with you?"

"Oh, very nice language...I told him not to disturb you, that you were sleeping"

"He doesn't care, Mom." She sat up and looked at Lucian. "What did you expect me to do? Wait for you to come take me back?"

"Yes. That's exactly what I expected you to do. You left with my baby."

“Our baby, he’s our baby; and you found me; so..." She was out of words, and looked past him to her mother who was hovering at the door way. "Mom, you can go now. We're fine."

"I can't believe you're letting him speak to you like that. I knew you were mixed up with a bad bunch."

"Mother, get out of here!" She pointed at the door and her mom closed the door behind her but she knew she was going to stand outside and listen.

"Nice woman. Now I know where your attitude comes from." he smiled a little, leaned down to kiss her and she willingly kissed him back. He climbed on the bed with her, straddled her hips and nuzzled her neck. Her eyes went droopy and she let herself smile.

 "I just had a baby remember…” She curled her fingers around his dark hair, stole another kiss. “He can't go back yet, Lucian, he’s only a day old and I'm not ready for this."

"You should never have had a baby if you aren't ready for it!" Her mother shouted from behind the door.

"Would you rather I would have gotten rid of him, gone against all your religion and killed him before he was born?” She shouted at her mother and put her face in her hands.  She could hear her mother praying outside the door.  Just the thought of it made her sick.

"Well you certainly can't stay here. You'll kill your mother before the week is over."

She let herself laugh a little. "Did she ask you if you were a drug dealer? Or maybe a pimp from the city?"

"No, but she did ask what I did, how we met. I've been here for nearly an hour."

"I'm sure she was surprised to see a handsome well-dressed businessman standing outside her door asking for me. I’m pretty sure she thought I was lying. She probably thinks you picked me up at an escort service and got stuck with me because you knocked me up."

"She was surprised, and I think she's more impressed than she lets on.  Come on, we have to go." He took her arm in his hand and she wrenched it out.

"No. I'm staying here. I'm not going back." She looked down at David, still asleep. He hadn't moved through all her shouting at her mother. "I don't know how to be a mom, I need her help. Please, just let me stay here for a little while." She pleaded with him. She didn't want to admit it, but it had been the only reason she had come back here. Otherwise, she would have avoided her mother like poison. David suddenly woke up and started to cry and her response was flared nostrils and frustration, she had no instinct to pick him up and soothe him. Lucian picked the baby up, swayed with him until he quieted. "Oh, big bad demon is good with babies...you take care of him."

"When I was created in the heavens, I was a watcher. I watched over mankind. But we also watched the new souls develop until they were ready to go to earth and become a real being. It's a skill you don't forget... I can't do this for you Addison, he is your responsibility. Lucifer is not going to take him until he's old enough. He has no use for an infant. He's trying to scare you and obviously succeeding." She stood up and took David from him, cradling him in her arms she took a long deep breath. She still couldn't fathom how this happened.

"Why didn’t we stop this as soon as we knew?”