The journal of deep thoughts

Wednesday part 2

Damien

Hello stranger...

I was going to do it, I finally was. I was going to make my best friend proud and finaly happy. I was going to introduce him to that one girl that I just couldnt forget. He introduced me to his girlfriend in his time and I felt really happy for him, I wanted to make him feel the same way as I did but after Marianne I found it really hard to actually dare to open up to someone that wasnt him. I know I say that I'm really close friends with the g**g and I am but I have a really strong conection with Steve, he was my friend, the father I never had and my psicologist. He was everything to me and I was to him. He was that one person that saw me at my worst and at my best and I'm thankfull that he never gave up on me, even if I had. She arrived along with Violet as usual but for the first time she was actually nice to me, s**t this doesnt happen just to anyone. After a while I told her I wanted to introduce her to someone and she just limited to stare at me with a curious smile, I grabbed her soft hand and guided her towards where Steve was, when we got there I could really notice how exited he was of actually meeting her. We talked for a while and we both actually convinced her to come to the party next Friday, that didn't happen everyday. After a while he realized he was late for class as usual, I cant tell you how anxious I was for knowing what she thought about him, she smilled and told me she really liked him. She asked me if I used to only hang out with him when I was at the other school and I was so relived that she liked my best friend I didnt even bother thinking my answer. I told her that I belonged to The death crew, s**t. As I told her this I just saw her smile fade away as she processed what I told her, I had been such a morron. How could I just tell her that without even giving a bit of explanation, a bit of a warning? Before I could saw anything she told me to go to class and didnt even wait for me. Through the classes I saw her distant and insicure, when I spoke to her she looked arround like if someone was playing her a prank or something. I became aware that I hadnt really told her anything about my past but how could I? The last thing I wanted was for her to run away from me because of those stupid mistakes I did in my past, I hated the thought that she would just stop caring, that we would grow apart, that all of those great memories and laughs we had would be forgotten. I hated my past, it chased me wherever I went no matter how hard I tryed to forgett about it. I knew that she was going to ask about it, she had every right to know, it was what was required in order for her to trust me but I didnt want to tell her. I didnt want to let her know how messed up I am and how f****d up my life really is, I wanted to be that guy she thought I was, just a simple troublemaker with a good heart and nothing less and not an alone i***t that used drugs, alcohol and s*x as a game. I cant lose her, I just cant, I dont know her very well but I want to be that guy that actually got her to open up, to become friends with her and if she wants, something more. Yeah, that how messed up my life really is...

Fucked up boy

Violet

Hello stranger...

I've got a lot to tell you...and yes...its got to with my favourite teacher. But first let me tell you that I've finally made peace with my bestie, since yesterday we've had a lot of fun and we didnt want to screw that up for us, we had a little chat with Damien, who I'm actually starting to like and then they both left becuase he wanted to introduce her to someone, she is becoming more social than ever, a miracle! So after that the day was as boring as every Wednesday, I cant tell you how much I wanted the classes to end and finally get a chance to be alone with Nathan, I swear that today he's going to make a move, he hasnt stopped looking at me. I decided to play it cool with my outfit today, I was going to wear just some jeans and a sweatshirt but I decided to wear a bit more of makeup this time, nothing much, just a gloss and mascara. After what had seemed days the time had finaly come, I decided to go to the cafeteria for a soda because I didnt want to act as desperate. I arrived ten minuted late but Nathan didnt seem concerned, he was sitting as always in his desk reading some book, god I really wanted to taste his lips.

" Hello Nathan" I said as I got in front of him, he just limited to look at me but he didnt even smile

" Good you're here, we should start"

That was the only thing that bastard said to me, I was a bit confused and tried to get his attention but he look much interested in giving his shitty class. How dares he ignore me in such ways, I was starting to get really angry when I realized that this wasnt going to work and there was nothing I could do, I never liked to not be in control and this was one of those days. I just limited to look at him with the most indiferent face I could, I wasnt going to let him know that his attitude affected me in the least. When the class was over I didnt even bother to say anything, why would I? He had just become in another insignificant person in my life, or so I thought. As I was heading towards the door I felt his hand on my arm but I continued walking, I wasnt just anyone to stay there, but he insisted again and before I knew it I was against the door with my literature teacher facing me. I knew where he was trying to do, but I still insisted on playing hard but my tries were useless, he had me trapped, it was my time to take over. As time passed he started getting closer and closer but I knew that this time he wasnt reaching to kiss my cheek, when we were so close that we could hear eachother breathing I decided to be the one to act first, and hell he wasnt expecting what I did. I grabbed him by the shoulders and slammed him against the wall next to the door, he gave me a confused look when I did it but he knew where I was going, my heart was beating really fast but I didnt care, I wasnt there to waste time, I started to get as close as I could until I had my lips aganst his at last, god he was good. We started slow but started increasing the intesity until the only thing that existed was our lips and his colonge. As we kissed his hands that started in my hips started getting lower and lower and mine were deep in his chest. I was the one who broke the kiss, I just stared at him for a few seconds, he had such a face of desire. I smiled and whispered in his ear " see you tomorrow Nathan". I left the room feeling triumphant, this is going to be fun.

Selfish diva

Abby

Hello stranger...

I'm about to kill my best friend, I ask her if she likes Damien waiting for her to tell me the obvious response but then she says she doesnt know, god I cant with this girl. But she had a point, she said that she didt knew anything about him, I just hope they do really end together, they look so cute! So putting that aside I finally moved in Oliver's place, my room is smaller that my old one but I'll take anything if it means I wont live with those traitors. It was really nice to get in touch after so long and he hasnt changed s bit, he's still that football ambicious kid that loves when I cook. After he helped me move in the little I had we sat down and had a decent conversation, he used to have a girlfriend but aparently it didnt work out for him and he works as a waiter in a near restaurant to help him pay his bills. After he heard of what had happened he headed straight towards my house and talked to my "brother", he sweared that he didnt know but Oliver knew he was lying and had a huge fight with him. He told me that they were still looking for me but as long as I stayed with him I wouldn't have to deal with them, I'm really great-full how he's helping me. Well I better go to sleep, I've got school tomorrow, yay...

Confused girl