autumn leaves inevitably

A few missed calls have me filled with Dread Something came to me when I'm sitting on the bed It felt like you were here and I remembered what u said You are acting different I don't want to believe you're dead They tell me you're all right You're ignoring me again I'm not sure how you can call yourself my friend you only want me on your drunk days when You want the rules to bend you used to call me family and now it's all pretend What happened to you that made you s0 selfish I've been through s**t before but I never thought I would have felt this I wonder if you're hurt I wonder if you're helpless and I know that in the end i have to stop being so selfless Eventually I'm going to start having to act the way you treat me disposable you only want me around when you need it's funny because I never thought you would leave me I remember when I died and you made your husband come and see me we used to be so close it was like family that we chose you were my everything we met when I had no clothes now you're questioning me I would never want him you should know I'm not sure what happened but I'm scared you overdosed because out of all our substances you've always done the most I don't want you near him I'm scared you'll be exposed if I try to stand up for you I might be killing us both I don't know what you're going through but there's one thing that I do know is that I'm not here for temporary and I'm trying to help you grow The person that used to hold you up is now what's keeping you low If both of you are to get through it i It's time for you to go a nd I promise that I'll be here I'll give you a safe place I'll be here all the long nights when you just want to see his face I don't really give a f*** I just want you to be safe I want you to stop the drugs I'm tired of them being lazed You're going to die if you don do something and something has to change I don't want you to leave me and I'd rather take your place you lost a child and my brother's in outer space if you go I'll go with you just tell me on what day