Assassin X

Alex

Alex stood outside her apartment until he could see through the fancy glass doors that she had disappeared into the bank of elevators and he was certain that she was on her way up to her own place, whichever one that was.

“Quite a girl isn’t she?” the doorman asked him.

Alex looked at the man, an elderly gentleman but still quite fit. He looked as if he’d been probably a security guard in his heyday, but other than age he hadn’t probably changed much. Not often what you’d see outside of an apartment building like this one.

“Yea, she is," he answered.

"She’s a mystery really. Quiet girl. In fact, other than her Papa, no one ever visits her. I think you’re probably the first person I’ve even seen her talk to.”

Alex didn’t know what to say to that so he simply smiled and turned away and began to walk back to the station. Not that he was going to get much work done but he didn’t really know where else he was supposed to be going.

The doorman, he’d said that the only person that ever came to visit her was her Papa, but Raven had admitted that she had no family, so who was it that was visiting her?

Was everything she said just an act? A ploy? Was this the story that she pretended was true, or she was told to say in order to protect who she was?

It was possible, in fact it was most likely, that she was using her story to keep her identity a secret.

But somehow, Alex didn’t think that was it. The way she had talked about it all, making her seem as fragile as glass, her eyes filled with things she would rather not remember, the way she ran away when her words became too much to handle.

It couldn’t be an act, Alex refused to believe it.

So then that begged the question, who was Papa?

He also had to wonder how was it that Raven could afford a place like that with just a barista salary.

Things weren’t adding up and he had no idea what he was going to tell Captain. If he went back to the precinct empty handed again, then he knew he was going to feel like a complete failure. So Alex made a quick decision and decided to send Captain a text with the small update rather than go back to the station. He needed to clear his head a bit, think of everything he knew, and then go back to Captain the next day with a fresh idea.

Found out where she lives. Nice place, too nice for a barista. Check into Vingo Towers.

Alex sent the text, wondering what he thought Captain would even find out. He knew he’d be looking for any paper trail, leasing contract, payments made to the building for rent, anything, but Alex was so confused about Raven that he had no idea how all of that would pan out.

Instead of dwelling on it, he decided to take a walk and get something to eat. It was cold out, that was for sure, but the nights he’d spent recently on his stakeouts had given him a higher tolerance for the cold, besides, he hoped it would clear the fog out of his mind.

Ham sandwich on rye, horseradish-mayo, his favorite sandwich, still didn’t help clear out the way his mind was working. With each bite his mind began to reel deeper down until the act of eating was just mechanics and his mind was no longer even on Raven.

It had fallen down into a hole that he usually tried to keep it away from. The death of his father.

He’d barely seen much of him that year, his dad had been working so hard on his case, catching this mad serial killer that was terrorizing the city. Three deaths the past year, all women, and they’d had so few leads. Dad felt responsible. Like it was all his fault. That those three young women that the media portrayed with bright futures ahead of them, were his personal fault that their lives were cut short.

Alex would listen to his parents argue at night when his dad would come home late, sometimes drunk if he’d stopped at a bar after a particularly bad day.

“You’re not a superhero, you can’t save everyone!” His mom would yell that same sentiment time and time again, yet it never sunk in.

“I should be able to save these girls. Maybe not the first one, or even the second, but I should have saved the third, this madman shouldn’t still be running loose.”

Alex remembered lying awake in his bed, his race-car sheets pulled over his head, as he listened to them argue. His mom was always so worried when his dad went out for a shift, even just a regular one, and Alex could feel that fear in his own bones.

But while his dad was on that particular case, his mom had been even more hysterical than ever, more worried than he’d ever seen her. It was like she had an extra sense that she knew something bad was going to happen to him and she was just waiting for the day it was all going to collapse.

When Captain showed up at their home a few hours after his dad’s shift should have ended, his head bowed low as Alex’s mom opened the door, it was clear their worst fears had come true. His mom collapsed onto a heap on the ground, sobbing while Captain did his best to comfort her, though he had his own set of tears streaming down his cheeks, getting caught in his mustache.

Alex sat on the stairs, his own little legs having given out, as he watched the scene in front of him. Captain had never said the words and that was something that Alex remembered distinctly, but Alex had known the truth all the same. He wasn’t sure how it had happened or why, but he was certain that hid dad wasn’t coming home that night, or ever again.

The ham and cheese sandwich turned to sawdust in his mouth at the memory of his dad and he took a long swing of soda to swallow it down. He stared at it for a moment, thinking about how his life had been changed so drastically that night, the night his family was cut into pieces.

Maybe the reason he believed Raven’s story was real was because he recognized the pain in her eyes as a reflection of his own. What she’d been through, the abuse and the trauma, was far worse than anything he could imagine, but pain was pain and he saw the rawness in her eyes.

For the second time in two days, the thought of Raven’s past made Alex push his food away, his appetite no longer there. He took another swing of the soda, trying to push the rest of the food down but it still felt stuck in his throat.

What was it that he was feeling for her? Sorrow? Did he feel bad for her life and what she’d gone through?

He supposed he did, who wouldn’t feel badly after they heard her story?

But that didn’t excuse what she’d done, who she was. Did it?

Did a bad upbringing give a person an excuse to be a coldblooded killer? Though the bits and pieces he was able to spend with Raven, she didn’t seem like the coldblooded killer he had worked up in his mind.

Either she wasn’t or once again he was back to thinking she was a genius actress.

Until he knew which was which, until he knew if he should be feeling sorry for her or hating her, until any of the knots in his mind became untangled, he wasn’t going to be able to make up his own mind.

There was only one thing he could really do, and that was get to know her better, but not as a cop. He was going to have to get to know her on a personal level. Until his head was clear he wasn’t going to be able to do his job at all, and not being able to do his job well was going to cost lives.

If he found out that his first thoughts about her being a killer were correct, then he could get on with taking her down with steel in his veins. Standing from his seat in the deli, he took his trash to the garbage and tossed it out. He pushed through the glass doors and for the second time that day, made his way to Raven’s apartment.

Though this was more of a personal call.

Alex felt his phone buzz while he walked and he looked at the screen to see it was Captain. Hesitating for only a second, he swiped at the screen and read the message.

Raven doesn’t rent her apartment. She owns the space. But the contract isn’t under her name. It’s under “Papa.”

Alex read the text one more time, making sure that he understood that correctly. What contract in the world would allow for someone to use a nickname like “Papa?” That didn’t make any sense. They would have wanted a name, a real name. And then he realized that there that name was again, Papa.

She had to have a family, a father, if he was the only one who visited her and the person who bought her apartment for her.

The signs were definitely pointing to her giving him a false story on their date, if that could have been even called a date. It was a half of a date really.

But he had now heard two mentions of Papa and she was living a pretty nice life in a pretty expensive building, not something that a foster child who used to live on the streets would typically live in.

He shoved his phone back into his pocket without answering it, he didn’t know what to say even if he did answer. Yes, he’d heard of the elusive “Papa,” but he had no idea who that was. And what was he going to tell Captain, that he suspected that any information he’d learned about Raven the night before meant nothing? That she had lied and fooled him completely?

That wouldn’t go over well and that wasn’t something that Alex was even willing to admit at that point. No, he had to find out for himself what was going on, then he’d text Captain back with something. Even if that something meant that he was completely wrong about her.

Had he let her sweet looks and seemingly pure vulnerability confuse him from the truths that were sitting right in front of him?

Probably.

Her building came into sight and Alex had to realize that he’d pulled a typical guy move. He’d gotten himself all the way there and hadn’t figured out what he was going to say. Stopping short once he saw the doorman, Alex put on his best smile and tried to sweet talk his way in.

“Back so soon?” the man asked.

“You’re right, she is something special. I can’t seem to stay away from her.”

The man eyed him at first just a bit skeptically and with the way he seemed to guard the building rather than let people into it, Alex had a feeling that he was going to get shut down pretty quickly. But instead the hulking man pulled the door open.

“I’m glad to see she’s finally getting out a bit. Seems she has a lonely life up there by herself.”

Alex nodded a thanks to the man and walked through the doors. Closing his eyes he turned back to the doorman, hoping this didn’t give him away that he wasn’t as close to Raven and he was letting on.

“Which apartment is she again? Sometimes I get my numbers mixed up.”

“Twentieth floor, apartment N.”

Alex smiled and turned toward the elevators.