In Between Us

Chapter 2

‘Can we talk please?’

I am waiting for the arrival of bus but my mind was flying to the message that popped up on my Skype right after coming back from lunch.

I almost forgot that he is still my boss and nearly replied to him asshole. Yes, that was him, an asshole, a jerk. But in the end, I opted not to. Rejection is perhaps my best weapon at the moment to protect myself from his destruction.

The following day, I got a message from our Admin Director. We will have a meeting regarding our rotation. We normally do this Admin annual meeting 2 months in advance prior to transferring to our new assignment, but this time, we are doing it much earlier. I wonder why.

I arrived earlier than the call time. I hate waiting, but I hate even more being not on time. I’d rather wait than arrive late. I don’t want to conform to the typical stereotype of Filipino time. That really sucks and it is something I cannot be proud of. I saw Sandy, in her 40’s, an admin assistant from Finance. I greeted her first. She immediately responded with a big smile. 

“Hey pretty!” her usual jolly greeting every time we see each other.

“Hi Sandy!” I greeted her. I had already got used to her compliments. She’s consistent.

“This meeting is quite early, huh? Any idea why?” she asked me.

“No. But normally, if there’s an unusual thing happens, probably there’s an upcoming change or the organization just changed. The recent change is…we have a new President.” I was caught there. I suddenly felt unusual and thought about Lucas. Hopefully this is not because of him.

“He is really hot, doesn’t he? I’m wondering if he is already married. Hmmm I’ll investigate!” Sandy exclaimed with a suspicious smile on her face.

Nosy. I just shook my head in disagreement.

I felt my phone vibrating. I pulled it out from my pocket while listening to Sandy.

‘Meet me after your meeting. We have an important topic to discuss.’ A message from Victor.

I typed OK and sent it.

“Good morning, ladies!” Samantha, our Admin Director, entered the room while giving us her sophisticated look. She really looks like Sophia Andres but a little bit taller and slimmer.

The room is quickly filled with the rest of the admins from different departments. One of them is Rosie, her close friend from the admin team, who started as a machine operator but promoted to admin assistant after 2 years. She became friends with her because they joined the company in the same week and, together, they attended the new employee orientation. That was the start of their friendship.

She noticed that Rosie sat beside her.

“How are you? Where have you been? Did you go for holiday? You have not been in your cubicle since… Monday?” Rosie asked her continuously while fixing her skirt.

“I-I’m good. I have been on the production floor since Monday”. Not sure if she noticed how I became uneasy upon answering her.

“Wait. What?! What are you doing there? Don’t tell me you were promoted to Supervisor or.. No..no..” Rosie said in a worrying voice.

I looked at her blankly, waiting for her next words. What is this girl thinking?

“Are you demoted to operator?” she asked me in a very low voice. “So, this meeting is about your replacement because you’re moving to production?” she even added.

“No. Stop there.” Instead of getting irritated, I almost laughed at what she thought about me.

“So what’s your reason then?”

Here comes the persistent Rosie. I know her this way and she will not stop until she can’t get the answer or at least, she’s satisfied with the answer. 

“I’ll tell you soon, but not now.” I turned to her and looked at her deeply, wanting her to sense the feeling that is from within.

“Hmmm.” She nodded while examining me.

“Tell me soon, ok? I would listen.” said Rosie, giving her a compassionate look on her face.

She gave her a small smile.

We were interrupted when Samantha started.

“Ladies, apologies for this sudden meeting, but I guess you got an idea what this meeting is all about. It just came out earlier than what we expected and it’s a call from the top.” Samantha said.

“During my one to one meeting with our President, I shared with him our job rotation that happens to us every year.”

Upon hearing the word President, she started to become uneasy.

‘I can sense something. I hope I’m wrong.’ I can hear the loud beating of my heart. I looked at Samantha to see any signs and I caught her looking at me attentively. I stared at her longer and not wanting to move my eyes from her. I don’t like what I am feeling. This is ridiculous. I still don’t know what is going to happen, yet my heart is trembling to death. An idea popped up in my mind and if that happens, I will be forced to look for a job. ‘I will hate you more Lucas.’

 She stopped thinking when she heard Samantha continue.

“Lucas wants me to focus on managing all our activities. I will still be reporting to him, but will not be doing his admin needs. He wants 1 admin assistant that will be in-charge mainly of managing his day-to-day schedule, just like what everyone of you is doing. So basically, all of you were candidates.” Samantha paused for a while.

“He went through with all your qualifications and he asked me about everyone’s abilities. I highly recommended you, Cara, and he accepted it.” My jaw dropped, I couldn’t find my own voice to disagree. “And for the rest, here’s all your new assignment. Any concerns, please let me know.”  I stayed silent for, I don’t know how long, until I noticed that most of my colleagues were starting to move out of the room. I checked Samantha and she was still talking to Yana.

I stood up from where I was sitting and approached her.

“Excuse me Ma’am, can we talk after Yana?” 'It’s now or never, right?'

I saw her nod and turned again to Yana.

“Can I say no?” I asked her right after Yana left the room, hoping that I would be given a choice.

She turned to me with questioning eyes.

“To be honest with you, Ms. Cara, you are highly requested by Sir Lucas. I can’t say no because that was his very first request. Though he still allowed me to submit the qualifications of all admin, I know he will choose you. I think just for the sake of going through the proper review of candidates, he did that. Anyway, you are qualified and I can’t find any reason for you not to take the job. When I said that I recommended you, yes, I did that because I trust and believe in your abilities. On the other hand, I am not quite sure why, of all our admins, it is you whom he chose. Does he know you?” A long statement from Samantha.

“We are highly promoting ethics here in the company Ma’am. So I want to be open as much as I can. Yes, I know him. We have a history. It’s a bad history. I don’t think I can deliver my work if I will be reporting directly to him. So, is it possible if you could consider the other candidate instead of me? Putting me in that position…will be the end of me.” I got emotional when I said the last words. I saw sympathy in Samantha’s eyes when I told her that.

Samantha didn’t react, unable to speak. Maybe I shocked her. Am I too fast opening up to her my concern about working with Lucas? I know I am not in the position not to accept what the company is offering me. I may lose my job.

If she can’t help me with this, maybe Victor could.

“I’ll see what I can do, Cara. But no guarantee as I already said yes to him prior to this meeting. I’m sorry if I didn’t ask your opinion about this matter. But I expect that you will still do your job as we are all professionals here and leave whatever personal issue you may have with him at home. We don’t want our personal problems intruding on our work, Cara. Perhaps this is his way of reaching out to you? What do you think?”

Perhaps this is his way of reaching out to you.

Perhaps this is his way of reaching out to you.

 These words kept on lingering in my head even when I was already back in production.

Samantha might be right. It’s possible that this is his way of reaching out to me to make my life a living hell again.

So, no. I will not allow him this time. I stood up from my chair and headed upstairs.

I needed to talk to Victor. Great. I remembered that Victor wanted to talk to me after the meeting. This must be something to do with my new assignment.

I knocked as the door of Victor’s room was closed, turned the knob and slowly pushed it to open. Why do I suddenly forget that there must be someone inside when his door is closed?

I regret my swift action, letting my emotion take over and so, unable to think before doing something. I panicked so I closed the door a little loudly so that the staff near Victor’s room turned their heads in my direction.

I moved quickly away from Victor’s room, not knowing where to go.

It was his only 3rd day at the company and since then, my stress level has been building up.

He was talking to Victor too. Since Samantha has already decided and seems like Victor is the next one or maybe he, also too, has already decided, who else I can ask for help?

I decided to go to the toilet near the fire exit. I am starting to experience emotional suffering. This is really too much for me. I cannot continue with this kind of situation. Him working in the company is already a torture, how much more if I will be directly reporting to him, that would mean seeing him every day of my life.

It can’t be. I don’t think I can do it or if ever I’ll do it, I am not sure if I can sustain it. Will I give up at the end?

This is hard. Why is he doing this to me? What is his motive? He is the one who has done terrible things to me. Why can’t he just leave me alone and pretend that we don’t know each other? Can’t he sense that I don’t want to see him? Is it not obvious?

I can’t talk to Victor in my current state of mind. My emotions would control me, my emotions would dictate me.

I was interrupted by my thoughts when I heard my phone ringing.

I am not sure if I’ll answer him but my mind is telling me to pick up the phone.

“Yes Sir?” I controlled my emotions.

“Can you go back? Let’s talk.” I heard from the other line.

“Ok Sir. Give me…10 mins.” I told him.

I washed my face until I felt relieved.

She decided to take the stairs instead of the elevator. I don’t want to bump into anyone at the moment and start a conversation.

The door is open when she arrives.

She immediately went inside and closed the door upon confirming that no one was inside aside from her boss.

“Sir.”

“Take a seat.” His face was serious.

I quickly obliged and sat down on the chair next to his table, facing him.

“Lucas is asking if you can be her admin for a while. You can start as soon as possible and if you get uncomfortable, you can leave him anytime. He is asking for just a few months or maybe weeks. He approached me because he knows that you are reporting to me.” Victor started.

I shake my head. This is very wrong.

“Sir, what about me? Do I have a choice? If yes, then no. I will not accept it even if my salary is doubled. If not, then I will resign. Sorry Sir, but he should have asked my opinion here also. It doesn’t mean that he is the President now, we all need to follow him.” right after I said those words, I immediately stood up.

Victor quickly stood up too.

“Of course, it’s always our choice, especially if we are not comfortable. I’ll talk to him, don’t worry.” He smiled at me, reassuring me.

All of a sudden, I felt a big and heavy object had been lifted up from me. I am so relieved. My tears started to fall down; unable to hold them back. I burst into tears and my boss was in front of me. I felt ashamed suddenly.

“Sorry Sir, I’m just happy.” I said while wiping my tears.

Yes, I can easily get carried away and my tears are shallow. I am in despair and seeing that Victor will be helping me, I can’t really help it. 

“You should be smiling. Is that what happy looks like?” I know Victor is lifting up my mood, attempting a joke. She saw him walking to his nearby cabinet and pulling out something.

He brought it to his table and handed it to me, a box of tissue and a bottle of water.

“Please drink. I’ll go to Lucas now and just stay here first if you want.” Victor told her.

I saw him walk to the door and before he left, he took a glance at her one more time. I take a deep breath when he is out.

Victor understood her situation though she hadn’t disclosed any information to him. The feeling that someone reassures her that she has a choice gives her hope.

‘Lord, thank you so much! I thought it was the end of me here in this company.’ Another bunch of tears fell down on my face. This overwhelming emotion made my eyes cry for minutes.