Broken Girl

inhale. exhale. inhale. exhale. pacing back and forth waiting, waiting for the call, the text waiting. Glancing down at the cheap knock off phone I got lucky to have I bite my lip anxiously, nervously, scared of what the next reply is going to be. Will I ever be enough for anyone,ever? DINK! The phone vibrates in my palms, still chewing on my bottom lip I open the message. before I can contain my reaction tears are falling down my face in streams. My lip is trembling, my hands now shaking as fear is officially sinking in. What now? What will I do? inhaling letting out a shaking breath. I shake my head, it doesnt matter because I will never matter I mean did I ever? Mentally preparing myself for the rest of my miserable life I sit down, I sit down on the concrete side walk, and I do the one thing I always do. I cry. Adaline Hale has always been on the bottom of her parents priority list, she never mattered. Her family considered her a failure. She didnt really have friends persay. She was a loner. Her family were religious bigots who pretended she didmt exsist due to her faith and her religion. She was not a normal average girl in the way you may assume. Her appearance was another story all together though. One word seemed to sum her looks up, normal. She was not strikingly gorgeous nor was she ever praised regarding her looks. Her smile never appeared. The only emotion she ever felt like she showed was her tears. After crying for hours I realized nothing was going to change me. Nothing could change them either nor how they felt about me, their failure of a daughter. I'm 26 years old how I feel should be my own, my faith should be my own. I wipe my eyes and decide moving on was the best thing I can do for myself. Leaving this bible belt town and finding myself a place where I could be me without persecution from others. The bus station was only a block away and even if the sun had set and the moon was now out it felt like it would be safe enough to head there on my own. The moon was not quite full but it seemed like tomorrow night it would be. The moon. Where I can always look to for guidance and reassurance. Sighing I notice I'm close to the station. I check my pockets and sigh I'm relief as I feel the wad of cash I have in my jeans. The station was nearly empty only a few people were filling the seats but this town is small and this amount of people being in one area was shocking. I walk to the counter trying to get a grip of my nerves. "Hello, Yes I need a ticket to Salem, Oregon. I'd like to leave as soon as possible." I reach into my pocket and wait for her to reply with the amount. Shes a middle aged woman. She has big thick glasses on and a grandma face soft and welcoming. She types and types and types. Finaly looking up at me. "Oh yes hmm let's see that will be fifty seven dollars miss..?" I force myself to look into her eyes as I whisper "Hale." While I hand her the exact change. She sets the ticket on the counter gives me a slight smile and goes back to her work. I shrug it off and head to the nearest seat to wait for my bus. This is going to be where I find myself.