I hate that I love him

Untitled

Aiden knocks on my door at eight sharpe ready to take me on a date, our first real date.

Jenny lets him in and I hear small talk between them because Jenny is not convinced he will change.

I walk from my bedroom into the lounge and its all eyes on me.

“Wow” says Aiden looking as sexy as hell in his light blue jeans and white shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows.

Jenny smiles as we all stand in the lounge feeling awkward.

“Shall we go” I say pushing Aiden to the front door and giving Jenny a bright smile.

“You two have fun” shouts Jenny as I close the door behind me.

We walk down to the car in silence and he opens the door for me to climb in.

“Where are we going” I ask as he climbs in the drivers side of the car.

“To my favourite place” he says with a twinkle in his eye.

We pull up outside the city zoo and I’m speechless.

“The zoo” I smile looking over at him looking at me.

“What, you don’t like the zoo” he asks smiling and walking around to my side of the car.

“I love the zoo” I reply feeling excited, its a place I haven’t been too in meny years.

He takes my hand and walks me to the front gates where a security guard lets us in.

“Evening Mr Jeffries” he says with a hushed tone.

“Thank you Mason” says Aiden slipping him some cash.

I look between them both and smile not knowing exactly what I just witnessed.

We walk through the exhibits and into the big cat area.

“Aiden this place is magical at night” I say smiling from ear to ear.

The winter chills creep into my bones but I do not mind, because this is something I have never done before and probably will never do again.

We stop where the Tigers are kept and look through the glass to see them all asleep.

Aiden stands close to me as I peek into their personal space.

When I look back at him he is smiling at me.

“Come” he says holding out his hand to me.

We walk into the reptile house where its dark and warm, and the feeling of being alone with Aiden does funny things to my insides.

We stop before a glass window that houses a huge python and I rest my hands and my head on the glass.

Aiden is behind me, closer than I would like but then who am I kidding, I crave his touch.

He leans his weights behind me and presses himself to my back.

I close my eyes at the closeness of him.

He moves my hair from off my neck and runs his fingers across my skin.

This feeling alone makes me breath a little faster.

He kisses my neck with a touch so light it could be a feather stroking my skin.

He moves his hand down and under my dress brushing his fingers up my thigh.

“Aiden please” I whimper not wanting him to rush me, but not wanting him to stop either.

“Tell me what you want” he breaths on to my neck making me push my backside into his groin.

I feel him smile, and I feel his hand move higher.

“Spread your legs for me” he asks in a way that has me begging to be touched.

I spread my legs giving him full access my my delicate area.

He runs his fingers over the soft material of my thong making me let out a small moan.

His mouth kissing and sucking my neck.

He slides his finger past the thin cotton and over my hard bud making me gasp at the pleasure.

“Tell me what you want” he asks in a hushed tone.

“Your fingers” I breath, the feeling becoming more intense as he slides his fingers backs and forth.

“My fingers what Demi” he asks bringing his spare hand around to the front of my dress and releasing my left breast from its prison.

“f**k me with your fingers” I breath not fully aware of what I’m saying or asking him to do.

He squeezes my n****e between his finger and thumb and slides his other finger slowly inside my aching hole and back out again.

“Please” I beg as he repeats this process all over again driving me wild.

I’m so close to letting go its making me lose control.

“Please what Demi” he asks sliding his finger back inside deeper every time.

I feel his erection pressed on my backside begging to be released.

“Let me come” I whimper wanting to let go.

He takes his finger away and spins me around to face him.

His hand finds my sweet spot almost straight away and he covers my breast with his mouth flicking my n****e with his tongue.

He strokes my aching bud and then inserts his finger, he repeats this over and over again never letting me get enough friction to let go.

It’s a slow pleasurable torture.

He demands I open my eyes and look at him.

“Aiden please” I beg holding the tops of his arms.

“Kiss me” he says through gritted teeth.

And as soon as my lips hit his he ploughs his fingers deep inside me and I find my release moaning into his mouth, the feeling almost to much to bare.

My body shivers and shakes violently for what seems like an age.

He undoes his pants and pulls out his hard wood.

“Aiden we cant” I breath against his lips.

He turns me around so my face is pressed up against the glass.

He enters me from behind making me call out his name.

He places one hand around my throat and the other holding my right leg up so he can go deep.

The feeling is of pure heaven making me cry out into the night.

Aiden groans and grunts getting closer to letting go.

Finally after a few more thrusts and me calling his name he fills me with his hot salty mess and he collapses against my back with me breathing hard against the warm glass.

Eventually we pull apart and I have the sudden realisation of what we just done.

“Please take me home” I ask feeling like a fool for falling for his charms so soon.

“Demi please” he says running his hands through his hair.

“What did I do wrong” he asks looking at me for the answers.

I close my eyes and feel like crying.

“Please just take me home” I reply fighting back the tears.

“I don’t understand” he says looking confused and coming towards me.

I hold up my hand as if to tell him to stop.

“Please don’t come near me” I say walking past him and out of the door.

“Demi wait” he calls behind me running to catch me up.

“I cant believe I’m alone with you for less that thirty minutes and you have your hands down my knickers” I say angry at him but more at myself.

We reach the car and he lets me in shutting the door for me.

I’m shivering from the chill of the night as well as the Adrenalin pumping through my body.

He drives calmly through the city streets until we get to my apartment.

I don’t wait for him to open my door because I need to get away from him.

He follows me inside the building and up the stairs begging me to talk to him.

When I open the door to the apartment Jenny is sitting on the lounge chair eating ice cream.

I try to slam the door shut but he barges in and demands to know what went wrong.

“You cant make everything better by getting what you want” I yell throwing my jacket on the sofa.

Jenny makes a hasty retreat into her room.

“Well I didn’t hear you complain” he yells back through gritted teeth and then instantly regrets what he said.

“Just get out” I scream throwing my hands in my hair and growling loudly.

“You are impossible” I add staring at him with wide eyes.

I walk off to my room and slam the door shut, how dare he make me feel that way.

I hear the front door close and I fall on my bed and sob.

The next morning Jenny asks me what happened and how it all went wrong.

I explain about him getting what he wanted and how he makes me feel.

Jenny just sits and listens not giving an opinion or telling me what to do.

“What do you want from him” she asks gently touching my hand.

“I want us to get back to where we were”,; “back to how it used to be” I say feeling sad in my heart.

“Then I feel you need to open up to him”,; “Demi give him a chance to explain properly” she looks at me with a small smile.

“Look I’m going to my parents at the weekend”,; “invite him over and just talk” she adds squeezing my hand.

I know she’s right, I need to let him explain without the two of us falling into bed.

I leave it another day before I send him a message asking if we can talk.

I tell him I will cook for him Friday evening and he replies telling me he cant wait for Friday already and this makes me smile.

Work is slow in the week although I am asked by at least Three people if I design homes for a living to which I reply no, but it’s something I would love to do.

Jenny says her goodbyes and heads for her parents as I set about grilling some chicken with creamy tomato pasta.

Aiden arrives just after Seven with the most beautiful bunch of flowers in his hand.

White and pink Lillies, my favourite.

They smell wonderful and I instantly smile when he hands them to me.

“Thank you” I say taking them from his hand and feeling that same bolt of electricity when our fingers touch.

“They are beautiful” I add walking into the kitchen to find a vase.

“Beautiful like you” he replies following me into the kitchen.

He stands closer than I would like but I pretend he has no effect on me.

“Something smells good” he says sniffing the air and closing his eyes.

“Well make yourself comfortable as it wont be done for another Twenty minutes I smile sweetly.

He takes off his jacket and hangs it on one of the hooks near the front door.

“Do you have wine” he asks coming back into the kitchen.

“There is some in the fridge” I say still arranging my flowers in the vase.

He opens the wine and finds two glasses from the cupboard.

“So how was your week” he asks in his slow sexy voice, a voice you could melt into.

“Slow” I say walking away from him to place the flowers in the living room.

“You” I ask when I walk back into the kitchen to stir the pasta.

“Same” he says coming to my side to hand me my glass of wine with a smile.

“Cheers” he says clinking my glass lightly as we stare into each other’s eyes.

“Cheers” I reply taking a sip and enjoying the feeling of the chilled wine go down my throat.

The air between us is charged and I resist the urge to throw myself at him and make out.

I miss his lips when they are not on mine, I miss his body when he is not close, but for now I resist because for now I need answers.

“Why did you lie about telling your sister you had feeling for me” I blurt out taking him by surprise.

He looks down briefly then regains his composure.

“After the brutal split of my parents, Lillian relied on me to look after her”,; “she hated the constant fighting between my Parents, the constant door slamming and the occasional throwing of objects from my mother” he Sighs leaning on the counter top.

I listen and feel my heart break for this beautiful man.

“When my mother finally left she didn’t want to take myself or Lillian with her and this broke Lillians heart” he says moving to the other side of the counter to pour more wine.

“So when I married Olivia, I promised Lillian that I would never let my marriage be like that, and I would never let her witness another bitter divorce” he adds downing the last of his wine in one go.

“So why have you stayed with Olivia all these years if you don’t truly love her” I ask still sipping my own wine.

“There are ways to divorce people that does not involve bitter court battles” I add not really knowing anything about the subject.

“You don’t know Olivia the way I do” he says with a warning look on his face.

“She can be so cruel” he adds coming over to stand in front of me.

“I didn’t realise how much I wanted to be free of her until you came along,; “Demi you made me happy for the first time in a long time” he adds reaching out and touching my face.

“You also made me fall in love for the first time in my life” he smiles a breath taking smile.

I lean my head into his hand for a brief moment, but then remember what I am doing and why he is here.

So standing back and putting on a smile I announce that the food is ready.

He helps me to plate it up and we sit across from one and other eating in silence, and I have to say I’m loving every moment of it.