The Psychopath's Obsession

Chapter 12

My heart was aching because of unknown emotion or I just don't want to name?

It's been a week since that incident happened. He drove me home but didn't even talked to me. After that, a week had passed, but still no Bullet. He didn't show up and I'm kinda missing him.

I know that I didn't do anything wrong or did I? I don't know. But one things I know, there's something wrong about Bullet. He's confusing the hell out of me. I couldn't even eat properly and focused to my work because he occupied my mind!

So to make it short, it's a hella week. Plus that Monica's always giving me a furious gaze. It's frustrating that I can't even tell my thoughts and feelings to anyone because even friend, I don't have one.

But today's different. Monica's in good mood that really a first time since I worked here. There's something that make her glow and blush.

This is the first time that she didn't have me her work to finish and didn't visit my cubicle to trash talk me.

Well I don't care about her. I just need to focus on my work and rest for a while because, just thinking about Bullet makes me tired.

I arrange the folders that I already finish. I finished it before lunch. I reminisce my days with Bullet. It's few but it makes me happy. I felt like my energy that had been drained comes again.

I don't even have a photo with him but he's a photographer. My thoughts with him popped when I heard my office mates giggles and yell like they're hoity-toity.

I scanned the room and found out that it's Monica. She's with a guy and the guy looks really familiar… because it's Bullet.

Yeah. She bring Monica a flower as his hot grin flustered on his face.

I felt my heart aching like I lost someone very special. I just heard my hearts shuttering sound. Oh my. Why am I teary? Is this a tears of joy? Why am I even happy? Because Bullet's here? But he's here because of someone! Not for me! And I'm feeling something because of that.

I'm not a wild woman but I suddenly want to pull Monica's hair! Shiz! What's happening to me? I don't want to feel this...

I thought that this just an ordinary day, well, when Bullet came to the frame, my life's not ordinary anymore.

I shut my eyes as I saw that Monica's lips touched Bullet's cheek.

It's hurt. Really, really hurt. And I don't know why I'm hurting. Maybe because, he will be with someone, I depended on him already and that's my wrong.

I shouldn't trust someone easily just because he talked to me. I should know that he's just toying me, my feelings! Because, no one would want to be friends with me. And that hurt me the most.

Funny that I just realized it all because of what's happening right now. I could still hear they're yell. Yeah, it's sweet. I treat Bullet as my friend, so better be happy with him, with his choices. Even if it's hurt.

As I open my eyes, I met his dark one. I didn't read any familiarity with his eyes, like he doesn't know me. It add to my already aching heart.

"Gosh! I'm so shy Bullet! You didn't tell me that you'll be here! Gosh!" And she squealed. You're so stay, Monica.

You could talk without squealing! Shiz! What's really happening to me?! I'm not like this. I never think of someone bad. I should stop this. But I still want to pull her hair and slap her face.

"I want to surprise you." His husky bed room like voice filled the room. I heard someone say that they already cut just hearing his voice. Oh people, I can relate. Big time.

"Well you surprised me! Come! Let's go to my office. I want to reward you." Monica's seductive voice echoed. I bit my lips hard as I calm myself.

Breath Milda. Breath.

What will they do inside her office? They can talk here! No need to go to her office! s**t!

"s**t…" I cursed when I broke my pen. Yes, it's in a half now. I can feel myself in rage.

Calm down Milda, please...

Bullet chuckled. "No need. I have a meeting, I just stopped by to give that to you. Bye, take care okay? Don't forget to call me." his voice was telling me like he don't want to go and just follow what Monica's suggestion to go to her office.

He's talkative now? Wow, just a week and he changed. A lot.

Monica made a sad face. Oh please, I want to puke. Shut up, Milda. You're so bad, you're not like this. Don't be a trash.

He have a meeting today but he still stopped here and gave Monica a flower. My tears that I'd been holding for so long just flow.

Now, this is indeed a one hella week! I'm so mad at you, Bullet.

It's been another week and I'm still in hell. Everyday in that week, I can feel the pain in my chest growing and slowly eating my heart wholly.

Bullet's here, I'm a bit happy because I'm always seeing him but not when I realized that he's here for Monica, who's always smiling like she won the lottery.

And because of that, I'm always sad. Sadder than before not having someone.

Bullet, he let me experience being accepted by someone. He let me feel that being dependent on someone is somehow okay. I considered him as my friend. My only friend aside from my cousin who accepts me fully.

I thought that Bullet is different from others. He can't even look at me. It's like, the Bullet I knew before was just my imagination…

"Mr. Bullet is here again! OMG! Are two in a relationship now, Ma'am Monica? You're so lucky!" And they squealed again.

I just bit my lips and focus on what I'm doing. If he don't want to See me again, then I don't want too. I'll do him the honor. I'll be avoiding him too...

I finish my work before looking at my watch. It's lunch time and I decided to eat at 7/11. I want some peace of mind.

I arrange my mess and pick my bag. Before he came, I want to be out, so that, I don't have to watch their sweet moment. It's hurts.

I press the elevator to open and I hurriedly bow when my Boss, Mr. Carson show up. He raised his brows to me and smiled.

"Hey, Milda." he greeted.

I smiled to and enter but it fell when I saw that he's with someone. Someone I'm avoiding. Bullet's eyes was cold and dangerous. It's like looking at the ruthless human being that alive.

I want to greet him too but I remembered that, he don't want to see me. So I did the most right thing for me, I ignored him. I get inside and keep my distance to him.

"Taking your lunch?" Brandon asked me.

I nod my head. "Yes Sir."

And the conversation died with my answer. They talk while I remain my silence. They talking about business. So I'm right. They're business partners. They even denied each other.

When the elevator door opens, I quickly run out and breath deeply when I'm outside the building.

You made it, Milda. Just do it slowly. You can do it. This is just the start.

He's there again for Monica. I envy her now. But I still envy her before because of her looks. Maybe that the reason why Bullet like her. I'm not surprise if he already love her.

Yes Monica have the looks, but when it comes to her attitude, man, just find another girl. You deserve better. But maybe, love really is blind. If you love someone, she or he will be perfect to your eyes.

I sighed and stop the taxi. I feel exhausted. I get inside the 7/11 and pick siopao, noodles and ice cream. I think I need it. Aside from my bed, food can give me comfort too.

I ate like there's no tomorrow. Yes, I pick more food. I'm not afraid to get fat because it never happens. I want to be fat before but nothing's had change.

After I ate, I can't even stand. I think, I overdo it. I ate too much. I'll cook some light dinner later. I don't think I can still eat heavy dinner.

I remain there for a minute as I realized more.

Maybe, Bullet just made fun of me? Is it just a dare? Does Monica command him to make fun of me? But looking at Bullet, i don't think he can take command with others. He's so full of pride!

I look at the dark night sky that full of star. I'm looking to the pictures that I received. It's from my stalker. There's a note and it's says,

"THERE'S A RAINBOW, AFTER THE RAIN. SMILE BABY, IM DYING TO SEE YOUR SMILE... "

I don't know why but I found myself smiling while reading his note.