Beyond Her Promises (editing)(Complete)

Part 12

Sammy's P.O.V:

                             After an amazing morning it was now time for me to open up and tell Amber everything. We sat on the couch in basement. I was trying my best to not have another panic attack while Amber sat on the other side of the couch facing me and waiting for me to speak.

"So. Who is she?" her question caught me off guard. I felt my heart beat rise and I knew I am gonna have another panic attack. Amber sat up and held my hand in hers. I took deep breaths and smiled at our joined hands, not looking at her.

"It was in highschool. Her name was Jenna. She was the most beautiful girl in whole school, which I thought was whole universe." I laughed nervously. "She was new in school. I saw her on the first day. It was raining and she didn't have any umbrella. She was staying in the shade when I went in and offered her. She had this smile... this utterly gorgeous smile that can make you smile too and when she thanked me, her voice was like a lullaby to my ears. I walked her to her mom's car which was right behind my own mum's. Before her mom drove by she waved me and I was just so damn struck by her beauty that I couldn't even wave back. That night I couldn't sleep because I kept on thinking about her. Next day, I heard someone open locker next to me which wasn't usual and when I closed mine, she was there. I thought God was bringing her to me. She said Hi but I was so lost in her eyes that the answer never came. She must have noticed when she started laughing. Her laugh was the one sound I could listen to all day for the rest of my life and never get tired. After that I was sitting with my friends in break when I saw her sitting alone I don't know what came over me and I stood up and joined her. She gave this beautiful smile that caused me to smile like an instinct. We became bestfriends. We were inseparable. Jenna's dad had died when she was in Eight grade. She lived with her mom and her sisters. Our mothers soon became friends as well and then we started having sleep-overs..." I paused.

My breathing was heavy. But Amber was there. I looked at her now, and she just looked back. I knew I had to go on. "One night when I went to Jenna's house for a sleepover, something changed. We would normally cuddle but this time it was different. There was something going on between us and it was way too strong for both of us to control. Jenna and I were laying down infront of eachother, our bodies were joined and are faces were close... Jenna leaned in and placed her lips on mine. It was my first kiss and it was beautiful. I wasn't scared of what anyone would think I was just happy. I was kissing the girl I was so in love with. We moved back and started laughing. This was our safe heaven. She leaned in and hugged me and I hugged her back. I was in madly love with her and so was she. Jenna didn't like us being so close in school because she was afraid that people might know but when we were alone we'd be in eachother's arms. I remember her once telling me the safest she feels is in my arms. When we were close, she had her own rules, like no lights while we got intimate, no holding hands in school, no pics while kissing not even on cheek, don't be over-protective in school.. Inshort anything that can show the world that she was gay was off the rules. I was happy with all of her rules because I was so madly in love with her. I'd do anything for her. All was good until senior year..." My words got caught in my throat and tears started flowing.

"It's ok Sammy. Take your time." Amber said holding my hand.

"No. I have to tell someone and I want it to be you. I trust you." she nodded.

"When we were in senior year her mom passed away. Jenna was very attached to her mom. After her death, Jenna changed into a completely different person. She became this cold-hearted person who I could hardly recognize. We started drifting apart and I tried and tried but nothing mattered to her anymore. I reminded her of all the promises we made of never giving up on each other but it felt like I was the only one acting on them now and that killed me. You know one day I knelt infront of her and begged her while crying to just listen to me for once, she looked at me, her eyes had this coldness in them, she laughed at me and told me that everything it finished. You know what I hate the most about that moment Amber?... I loved that heart-wrecking laugh of hers too. I loved her so much that it destroyed me. She changed. She made new friends with girls who bullied me in high school just because I never did any makeup or dressed like them. She got herself a boyfriend and turned into one of those mean girls who everyone tried to avoid. But I couldn't hate her. I still don't hate her." I wiped my tears. I was practically preparing to tell Amber something that might change her perception of me.

"After that I got depressed. I tried to hurt myself in every way possible. I'd do things that scared the s**t out of me. Until one night my mom caught me crying in my bed. She came to me and asked what was wrong. I thought she's my mother and I can tell anything to her, and that was the biggest mistake I ever made. I told her everything about me being gay and being in love with a girl. My mum listened to me quietly and when I was done she left the room without saying anything. I thought I might have over whelmed her. But that was not the case. Next day after school, my dad came to pick me up with my mum. He had always been distant with me, he only cared about me having straight A's which I gave him. They drove me to this house on the outskirts of town. My mom told me to in with my father. I was confused as to what was going on. When I entered the house it gave a scary vibe. I was introduced to a woman as the patient by my own father. Before I could ask him what was going on, he left. That woman then took me down to the basement. Next thing I remembered there were two other women holding my hands while they tied me in chains. The woman whom they called "Changer" because she apparently changed gay people into straight, she stood infront of me and told me a few things about how a woman is to love only a man and not another woman. This changer lady had a belt of some kind in her hand which I had a hint what was for. She went to my back and whipped me with it. Each time getting harder. I screamed and screamed but it was of no use. This torture went on for two hours, which they called soul cleansing. I must have blacked out because of pain because I woke up in my room. My first thought was a nightmare, but when I moved my arm the pain was there. I took my cell from my night stand and texted Jenna, crying and told her about everything, she replied after a min and asked only one question 'did you tell them it was me?' I told her no. She told me to not tell anyone. I told her that I'd die but I will never betray her. She didn't reply again. I cleared all our chats and even deleted her no. before my mum came to take my cell. The procedure of cleansing went on for a complete month, then I was spared for my finals. Then, after graduation they started again. This changer lady always asked me the name of this other girl but I never said, I kept my f*****g promise. One day they stopped the procedure, they told me I have been changed back to being straight. I was taken home by my father and after they slept I sneaked out to Jenna's house, I had to see her because my parents were sending me here early morning. I was in excruciating pain but it didn't stop me. When I reached the front of her house I saw her standing there, with her boyfriend. They were kissing and laughing. I stood there, forzen, like my soul had just left my body. Then her eyes caught me and she had this look on her face like you get when you see something... disgusting. I felt like she just pulled my heart out of my chest and put it into fire. I still wanted to give her a chance to come clean, so I moved forward. Her boyfriend looked at me the same way she did and asked her if she knew me, you know what was her answer?.... she said that I look like a beaten-up w***e and they both burts into laughter. Jenna's elder sister Betty came from behind me and found my bleeding from my back. She quickly held me and shouted my name 'My God ! Sammy your back! why are you bleeding?'. I remember falling right there and I remember the look on Jenna's face but I don't remember who brought me home. Next day I was sent here to live in this house alone. Now my parents think that I am straight and they call once every two months. My aunt calls me every week, she's still pissed at my parents for what they did--" I stopped speaking when I saw Amber crying.

"Hey.. Why are you crying?.." I asked her but she didn't say anything and just hugged me. He little gesture melted me and I hugged her back. I held her there for some time and asked her if she still wants to hear the rest and she nodded. She moved a bit and rested her head on my shoulder her arms still holding me.

"After I came here I changed my number. I left all people behind. I never let anyone in. I did go to a counsellor for most part of my college and she told me to find joy and accept myself. But it was easir said than done. I have moved on with my life and all was good until a month back I recieved an email. It was someone threatening me. They said they have proof that I'm gay and they know about Jenna. Honestly I don't give a s**t about myself but when they told me they knew about Jenna I got scared. They have asked me to give them 30 grand or they'll tell everyone about Jenna. I have managed to gather 10 grand but I needed more, so here you are. My first attempt at kidnapping." I laughed trying to cheer Amber and I heard her chuckle between her sniffing.

"The person you're trying to save is Jenna?" she asked.

"Yep.."

"But why?"

"Excuse me?"

"That f*****g b***h hurt you so bad. Why would you try to save her ?" she sounded angry.

"Amber.. I told you not to talk about her like that."

"Why Sammy? she is a f*****g b***h. How dare she hurt you like that? And why the f**k are you still risking everything for that f*****g--"

"Amber please... I told you don't--"

"No you don't... Can you not see she never loved you? she f*****g used you!. She f****d you Sammy and then when she was done with you she f*****g moved on."

Amber's words were loud and clear, but they were more like acid in my face. I wanted to shout at her but I didn't wanna hurt her. I picked up my keys and my jacket and left. I needed air.