The Guy With The Diary

Chapter 3

NIKLAS

The reoccurring beeping of the alarm clock by my bedside was the first thing I heard as I woke. I turned to my bedside stool, switched the alarm off, and sat uprightly.

My inquisitive mind began to wonder what humans did after they woke. I guessed the religious ones went on their knees. I knew this because Phil, the guy whose beautiful home I stayed in, did the exact thing every morning. He prayed about five times every day and never went anywhere without his rosary hung on his neck. Not to mention that he went to the closest Roman Catholic Church every day and took an active role in helping the catechist. The dude didn't want to miss heaven.

I loved watching him pray with his rosary in his hands as his thumb went through each bead. It was quite a thing to watch, seriously, it was. I also wondered whether he ever thought about his good God when he brought girls over. I mean, I have stayed only a day over two weeks with him, and I have woken up, thrice, to find him and some ladies in the living room, totally bare of clothes.

“Good morning,” I said to Phil as he sat looking glum in the kitchen.

He turned, looked at me and continued drinking his rum. I was getting used to him already. Hell, there were some days he would act as though I didn't exist.

Everyone thought him a mean little cunt, though, but that didn't mean they would pass on a chance to have free drinks—and in a very nice house— whenever he threw parties.

I didn't think Phil was as mean as he posed to be. Surely, he was harsh at times for the silliest reasons, but not a very mean person. If anything, he was just like everyone else; ever trying to discover himself.

The ride to the lecture hall was a nice one, though I had to pass a longer route. I always tried my best to avoid people, or at least, getting too close to them.

The lecturer was a female with a robust physique. She spoke as though she wanted everyone to hear her, but that was hardly the case.

CustoDia university was indeed a sight for sore eyes. Every school-owned property was built to appease the eyes. What it lacked in anything else, it gained in beauty. I hadn't planned to go CustoDia. I could never have thought I would go to a uni like CustoDia. It was literally in the middle of a city— and for a vampire who was ever trying to avoid spilling blood, well, there couldn't be a worse choice.

But as it happened, I visited the city fourteen months ago for a concert. I remembered seeing my hands tremble as I stayed amid thousands of people. I didn't enjoy the concert for even a second and I left before the first of the three performers left the stage.

I had thought I would jump on the next train and never come to the city, but then, I came through the university. And goodness, did I fall in love with it.

I'm pretty sure I can't put it into words, but the moment I saw CustoDia, I knew I would do all I could do to get into the school. That was precisely what happened.

Oh, then I met Phil! I was skeptical about him at first because he seemed to always be in his heard. One moment we were like destined besties and the next, he would be dead silent.

I met him in another city and told him that I would be starting at CustoDia. Luckily, he also schooled at CustoDia … even more shocking, he had properties close to the university and was willing for me to live with him. For free. I still don't understand why because he, as I came to learn, never allowed anyone to live with him though his house was huge.

“Hi,” a girl in a blue shirt that said ‘I'm no one's hoe’ shouted to me from across the entrance of a building opposite the lecture building.

I bent my head and went my way. It used to hurt before, you know. I would always feel bad whenever I treated humans badly. But I knew better. It was for the greater good. I couldn't allow myself get close with humans. It was like being friends with a piece of beef. It wasn't even something any vampire with a conscience would consider at all. Resisting befriending humans was a life-long task on its own, and loving a human was stupid and pointless. You might as well slit their throat already.

Someone stopped me again. It was a guy this time, at least. Wait, I take it back. Not sure this guy identified as male. He was scrawny and had a lot of make-up on his face. He had long hair that was plaited into a ponytail. He acted like a girl so I took a wild guess that he was queer.

He wanted me to join some student organization that was recently set up to help fellow students.

“What do you guys do?” I asked.

Puckering his lips while fiddling with his hair in one hand, he said, “Just about anything to help our fellow students, especially on the issue of mental health.”

“Mental health? I don't know much, but I'm sure you need an expert for that.”

“Uh… yes. But here's the thing, most people don't dare to go meet therapists or shrinks of any kind. Why? Well, there is a number of reasons.”

All of which I'm very not interested in, I thought to myself.

He continued. “For one, some people will never go because they don't think they are sick enough, or at all. Then they keep suffering and suffering and never end up getting any help.”

The young man seemed very passionate about helping people. He admitted that he wasn't sure if this would help anyone, but he was willing to try. He said the group would be responsible for reminding people that mental health wasn't something to be taken lightly.

Man, I didn't see any reason not to join so I signed myself. Especially since I could stop any time I liked. They met every last Saturday of the month so it wasn't going to disturb me in any way.

“You are the sixtieth member,” he said, smiling from ear to ear..

I left him and walked my as$ away.

I didn't know how I felt about interacting with so many people in one day. Yes, two was two too many people for me. It was quite unsettling. Funny enough, I left my country of birth for this one with many plans of making friends and running away from living alone. Mother, who rarely spoke to me at all, said I would learn, and learn I did. Now I tried to avoid people at all costs. I only agreed to live with Phil because the guy was a sadist and just as much of a loner as I was.

“It was high time,” I said to myself as I reclined on a street bench.

Fine, I had to think about it. I had been trying to stop myself from thinking about it, and have done alright for three good days now. No more.

It was that girl I sighted at the party Phil threw three days ago. I watched her get into the compound with a guy I figured was her boyfriend. He had his hands on her waist and they seemed like one of those college couples that never got tired of making out in public. Now you can call me weird if you want, but I felt jealous seeing her in his arms. Why? Don't ask me.

She had a curvy shape and looked fire in the Jean trousers she had on. She had longer hair than most black girls I had seen, but that wasn't what made her unique. Hell, I couldn't say what.

From the moment I set my eyes on her, they became hers to control. And so I came downstairs and watched her as she cracked up with her boyfriend and some other boys who kept pouring beer down their throats. I hated the disco lights that danced around, but I managed to stay down there watching her. She smiled as she watched them drink. Her smile seemed to make the annoying lights tolerable to me because they lost their shine to her.

I smiled when I heard her voice. It was loud, strong, and confident. I loved it. I have never fought so hard to not talk to a girl. We vampires rarely get sexually attracted to humans. Explaining why the three girls I have related with sexually were vampires. But that was when I was still at home.

Now, I know you wouldn't believe me, but I never wanted this girl to see me. I brought myself back to my senses and left that room for a quiet part at the pool. There was no need to admire a girl you would never approach. Besides, me watching her from afar nearly awakened my predator senses and that was never a good thing. Take it from me.

As I took my diary out and began writing about seeing her, I saw her. And even crazier, she saw me too. I don't know if it was my little mind playing tricks on me, but I think she looked at me for a good two minutes, or so, without takimgt her gaze from me. While this happened, I doodled on the page and that was something I never did. My diary was a piece of my being and I only did that because I was really anxious.

It was killing me.

Questions kept popping out in my mind. Did she find me weird? Many people have commented on how pale my skin was. I tried to see if she was staring at me admiringly, but I couldn't say. If anything, she stared at me as though I was something out of place. Not sure how that made me feel.

After hissing at a girl who came to her, she ran away. Not out of the building, but as far as she could get without leaving the compound. How did I get to know? Well, I followed her. I watched her as she fell asleep, and that happened fast. I watched her as she inhaled and exhaled noisily, laying on a couch.

I stayed there even after her boyfriend got too drunk and was taken home by some other guys. They didn't seem to remember that he came with someone. She woke when the party was well over. Everyone had gone home already. Phil told her that her boyfriend was carried home.

She walked out into the street waiting for a cab, I guessed. I pitied her after she had waited for about an hour and offered her a ride home. Our eyes met again and I could see that she recognised me.

Did she see how unsettled I was?

She asked me what my name was and as usual, I brushed that away in a not-very-nice manner. But this time I felt awful about it. For the very first time in a very long time.