Surviving His Memory

Chapter 5

Do you remember when I said Diane and I had made a deal about breakfast and lunch being delivered to my room? Why did I forget that while I was drinking my body weight in "the nectar of the God's?" I am not at all equipped to be an adult. I drag myself out of bed with a pounding headache. Every time room service knocks on the door, my head feels like it could split wide open. After rolling myself out of bed and staggering my way to my robe, hanging next to the shower, I make my way to the door. I bounced off the wall twice trying to stay upright. Apparently, I'm still drunk from last night. How much tequila did we drink?

Opening the door, I must look as terrible as I feel. The, maybe seventeen year old young man that had brought my food, immediately took two steps back as his eyes widened in what looked like horror. "Good morning ma'am. Here's your breakfast." He tells me quickly. "Thank you," I mutter, after he pushes the cart inside my room. "Hopefully food helps the hangover." He chuckles as he leaves. "No kidding!" I laugh and then wince as I close the door. My head feels like someone is hammering away at the inside of my skull.

I grab a water bottle to have with breakfast and swallow two pain relievers. I pick at my eggs and eat most of my toast before I decide to cover the rest and go back to bed until the headache lessens. Hopefully, I feel better after a couple more hours of rest.

The next time I open my eyes it is almost noon but my head feels a thousand times better. My mouth is as dry as the desert, but that I can handle. I drink what is left of my water from breakfast and grab another bottle from the small refrigerator. Heading into the bathroom, I start the shower and brush my teeth. I strip out of the tank top and shorts that I slept in and step under the warm water.

I make it through another shower without crying. I'm proud of myself, as I comb my hair and get dressed for the day. Today, I selected my red bikini. To wear over it, I chose my dark blue shorts and a white loose fitted top. I slid on my favorite pair of white sandals. I decided to blow dry my hair with a large round brush. When I finish, it will have a full wavy appearance. Until last night, I hadn't done anything with my hair since Evan's funeral. I had no desire to. Today, today I feel like I want to try to be okay.

As I finish my hair and stare into the mirror, I realize that I want to be who I am, not who I am without Evan. I want to become the woman I am now because of Evan's love, not because of his death. I have to start reminding myself of his life and that he lived life to its fullest every day. Evan didn't just die, he lived. The thought puts a smile on my face, just as a tear rolls down my cheek. I will always miss him. He will forever live within me because I wouldn't be who I am without him. But I have to move on with the rest of my life at some point. I put on waterproof mascara and a thin layer of lip gloss before I decide I'm ready.

With a little more pep in my step than I had thought possible at breakfast, I grabbed my wallet and placed a straw-colored sunhat on my head. I snag my sunglasses off the table next to the door, make sure my room key is in my wallet along with my phone and some cash. I swing open the fridge and grab another bottle of water, then I'm off to Cheryl's room.

Cheryl opens her door after three light knocks. "Finally! I'm starving and was hoping we could get lunch?" She says with an arch of her perfectly sculpted eyebrow. She looks better than I did this morning. Her long, almost black hair is straightened. It hangs all the way to her thin waist, just an inch or two longer than mine. Her blue eyes are stunning against her tan skin. She really is a gorgeous woman. She's wearing a short jean skirt with a bright yellow tank top. "Absolutely! I was going to suggest the same. Then maybe the beach for some vitamin D? After last night I need all the vitamins I can get!" I say and she laughs with me before she nods in agreement. "I felt terrible this morning. You were right, we had a lot of tequila!" She tells me as we leave her room and begin walking through the hallways of the hotel.

At the end of our hallway, we turned right to head toward the lobby. Only as we came around the corner I was met with what felt like a wall. "Oomph...ouch." I fell on my ass. Great, on the floor again! Ugh.. "I'm so sorry! I should have been paying more attention!" ...wait, I know that voice. Looking up, sure enough, I was met with the gorgeous green eyes of the one and only God-Man. He's not alone either, one of his buddies is with him. Good Lord, where on earth do they breed these beautifully crafted, gigantic men?

"It's okay. I'm really good at falling. It's my specialty." I tell him as he helps me back to my feet and we both chuckle. The rumble of his laughter sends a shiver through me. "We have to stop meeting while you're on the ground though. This can't be normal." He jokes. "Ha. Yea. Well, I'm not exactly normal, per say." I reply, causing everyone to laugh again. "No. You, Ellie Grace, are far from normal." He said with a wink, causing my face to heat up and for me to look away. Why does this man make me so nervous? "We all have our own quirks!" I told him with a small smile and a shrug of my shoulders.

"Where y'all headed in such a hurry anyhow?" God-Man's friend questions us, with a whisper of a southern drawl. "Lunch...finally! Ellie only now rejoined the land of the living." Cheryl answers him with a laugh. "I didn't find you at my door for breakfast this morning either lady!" I teased her. "Damn tequila made us both starve today! Nice to run into you both, but unless you're coming to lunch, we must say goodbye." She says, "Before Cheryl over here wastes away!" I add as I hook my arm in hers. She doesn't need to know that I had a piece of toast this morning. I'll never tell!

Ha! I laugh at myself internally, until I realize that she invited God-Man and his friend to lunch. My mouth went dry as I heard his friend's response. "We would love to join you. Let me run to my room and I'll meet you all in the lobby." He takes off, at a jog, down the same hallway that Cheryl and I came from. "I have to run and grab my wallet. I'll meet you there as well." God-Man says while looking me in the eye. A small smile finds its way to my lips and I nod at him.

Once the men both head toward their rooms, Cheryl drags me to the lobby. I feel like I'm on autopilot. "I don't know if I can do this. It feels too much like..like a..." "like a date?" Cheryl finishes for me and I nod again. "It's just lunch babe. Besides, I'll be right next to you. We can get to know them together. No obligations here, Ellie, don't worry. I think it'll be fun. Then we can go relax in some of those loungers on the beach!" She told me and somehow her words actually helped settle down my racing heart. "Okay."I agree with her.

So now we are waiting. My stomach is still in my throat, but I think that's from the promise of seeing God-Man again. Ethan. His name is Ethan. How embarrassing would it be if I called him by the nickname I gave him? The real answer is mortifying. I would probably book the next flight home and cut my losses.

"Oh! I almost forgot to tell you! I talked to Emery this morning. There's a luau the day after tomorro. The girls all want to get together again. She also suggested that we try the Maui Brickyard Grill for lunch." Cheryl's exuberance, thankfully, shakes me from my thoughts of embarrassment. "That all sounds perfect to me, but no tequila this time." I said jokingly. "Same thought! Besides, I'm feeling kind of rum-ish" She winked at me. This woman is too much. She and Evan would have been a hoot together. She matches his energy. This must be why he sent her to me. My heart squeezes at the thought.

"Hey babes, where'd you go there? You okay?" Cheryl's voice was thick with concern. It was then that I realized another tear escaped my eye. I quickly wiped it away and smiled weakly at her. "I'm okay. You just remind me of him. It's nice to remember who he was, ya know?" She hugged me, "I am glad that I could help you remember. It's important that we never forget. Almost as important as living for them." She whispered as we both saw God-Man and his friend walk into the lobby. "Yum...that one is definitely lick-able!" Cheryl said, and I burst into laughter.

She and I are still trying to catch our breath as Ethan and his friend walk up to us. "What's so funny?" His friend asks. "Inside joke. You had to be there." Cheryl says quickly, which succeeds in making me laugh harder again. I have tears in my eyes, " Oh I think we could share with our new friends Cheryl!" I choked out through my laughter. "Yes! Please share!" Ethan is smiling at me, watching me.

"Don't. You. Dare." Cheryl scolds me and now I'm laughing again. "Fine. Okay, Ethan's friend, what is your name?" I turned my head to the man in question. "Oh that's right! I'm Calvin but please, call me Cal, it's nice to meet you both." Cal shakes both of our hands, like a true southern gentleman. I hear Cheryl giggle. Yes, I said giggle. I barely held back another round of laughter. Her face was so funny! I think she truly thought I would sell her out. I shook my head, trying to focus on the reality in front of me.

"Where do you want to go for lunch?" This time it's Ethan who helps bring me back from my thoughts. "Emery said we should try the Maui Brickyard Grill. I mean, if that's okay with you guys?" I tell him as we begin walking toward the front of the hotel. "No objections here!" Cal says. "Fine by me." Ethan confirms. "She said it is within walking distance..." Cheryl looks down at our feet, "good. We both wore sensible shoes." "Yea, my feet need a day of rest after my shoes from last night. Which I'm blaming you for..by the way!" I knocked Cheryl's shoulder with mine. After all, I wore them because of her. She scoffs at me. "They screamed to be worn..so I'll shoulder that blame." She says as she shrugs, causing me to laugh at her. "You mean the red shoes?" Ethan asks. I turned my head quickly and furrowed my brow at him. "You noticed my shoes?" I asked. He smirked. "Of course he noticed those shoes. I told you they were screaming. He probably heard it too." Cheryl interrupted very matter of factly. I just shook my head at her.

When I try to glance over at Ethan, our eyes meet, "no apologies!" He says to me. Cheryl choked over air as she started laughing again. "You put that man through the table! I still can't believe that happened!" I just started laughing again. "I told him to let go of me...I even told him what would happen if he didn't. He tried to call my bluff. My dad didn't raise a victim. He always said, he was raising a warrior." I winked at Cheryl. I miss my dad. Cheryl puts her arm around my shoulders as we walk toward our destination. I spoke about my father last night at girls night. He was wonderful. My mom left us when I was twelve. He was my everything. Him and fighting. We found out about his cancer too late. There was nothing the doctors could do. I buried my father ten days after my twentieth birthday. Seems crazy to think that it has been so long ago already.

"I know I appreciated seeing you in action!" Cal says and I scoff teasingly. Thankful to be out of that particular thought. "That was nothing. I was in a dress. That limits the moves I can make modestly..." I playfully roll my eyes. "Well then tell us, Ellie. What can you do?" Ethan asks. I feel myself blush. My heart races. I enjoy talking about my dad and fighting. I think I would talk to this man about anything, though. That thought is terrifying but maybe a little exciting too? "I have been fighting since I was twelve. My father was in the special forces. He had left the service that year. After I had been practicing kung-fu for a while, he wanted me to master the moves in a dress and heels. He always said, that is when we are most vulnerable. I needed to know my own weaknesses and make them strengths. Then I continued on with different styles of martial arts. I think he may have thought it would all help with my coordination....When I'm fighting, I'm balanced but in everyday life I tend to be... a little clumsy." I told them with a laugh at the end. "A woman of many talents. Even if her specialty IS falling." Ethan laughs and I cant help but join him. Gosh! It feels good to laugh again. Without even thinking about it, I shoved him in the upper arm playfully. The grin that he rewards me with makes my stomach flip again. I can't stop the smile on my face as we arrive at our destination.

Only as soon as we walked in, I was met with a familiar face. One that I haven't laid eyes on in sixteen years. The only face in this world that would make me grab Ethan and Cheryl's hands at the same time "I can't stay here. I..I'm sorry." I stuttered before I darted back outside. So this is where she has been for all these years? My mother is a snake.