OUR STORY

FLASHBACK(WHAT ARE WE?)

WHAT ARE WE?

12/10/19

                Our first ever fight happened today, the words you said were like knives stabbing my chest.

Kendra’s POV

“The bistro is not that packed right now, I’m free to talk,” I said talking to brie on the phone

“oh ok, I really miss you” she replied

 I felt sad thinking that I haven’t seen her for a couple of days.

“I know; I miss you too” I replied sitting in the smoking area

“When are you coming back anyway?” I asked

She’s currently at her dad’s home town an 8-hour drive from here. Even if I wanted to visit her. She wouldn’t let me

“I don’t know yet, maybe in three days?” for some reason I kind of felt an excitement on her voice.

“I see, what else did you do today aside from going to the farm?” I asked gazing at Hailey in front of me.

“that’s all I did today went to the farm and fed the animals” she replied and you can hear the happiness in the tone of her voice.

Hailey stood from her chair and walked towards me. I cover the lower part of the phone and whispered

“do you need anything?”

She nodded and mouthed the word ‘you’

I hear brie talking on the phone as Hailey suddenly kissed me aggressively.

“I hurried to come here and this is what I see? I wanted to surprise you, but I was the one surprised” you can hear how hurt she is by the sound of her voice. I instantly pushed Hailey and stood up

“Brielle let me explain,” I said walking towards her

Her face is all red and tears falling from her beautiful eyes. She bit her lower lip and said

“there’s nothing to explain, we are not together, I forgot about that,” she said and run leaving the bistro

I was about to follow her when Hailey pulled my arm and said

“Let her be, that’s what she gets not knowing her place”

“f**k off and never talk to her that way ever again,” I said in frustration and rushed outside but I couldn’t see her anywhere.

I tried dialing her number but she’s not picking up. I texted her multiple times still no response

I have been sitting on the counter for about 2 hours. I can’t sit here any longer and do nothing.

“CJ, I have to go can you do the inventory today and make sure to lock the place properly,” I said before grabbing my bag on my office and headed to the parking lot.

I dialed Kath's number to ask where Brielle might be

“what do you want?” she asked obviously irritated

“I’m sure you know what happened, I need to find her” I replied starting my car

“what for? You broke her heart asshole” she said in a whisper-shouting way

“I just have to find her, please” I begged

“ok ok, I’ll trust you today, she might be at the park near my house or the park near Lendon's house or at her aunt’s café that girl likes to eat when she’s frustrated. I’m sure she’ll be at one of them. now leave me alone I’m in class” she said then hang up

I texted a quick thanks before driving to Kath's street which is nearby.

I got out of the car as soon as I parked. I run through the park looking for her. I know I have the image that I slept with whoever comes to me. Before I met her I admit I slept with a lot of people. Owning that kind of business makes you eye candy to some people.

I run around the park twice and didn’t see her anywhere. I went back to the car and drove to Lendon's subdivision. After 20 minutes of driving, I reached the park. I got out and entered the park as I dial her number. It’s only ringing but she’s not picking up.

“where the f**k are you” I whispered in frustration.

The park is too wide, it took me almost half an hour just to go around it once. I went to my car then drove to her aunt’s café.

“I should have headed there in the first place,” I said to myself and sigh 

I looked at the time and it’s already 7 pm I spent an hour and a half driving and running at parks. Why didn’t I thought of coming here first.

I arrived at the café and I immediately saw her by the window with someone. She looks happy being with him. I know she likes him for a long time before we even met. I can’t help but get jealous knowing I don’t have a match with him. He’s a guy for pet’s sake.

I pulled out my phone and dialed her number she just looked at her phone and shoved it in her bag. I texted her to come out multiple times for her to notice her phone and when she finally saw my messages her eyes grew and she looked outside the window. We made eye contact and her expression changed. She looked away and talk to Lendon. She stood up and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before she left.

“what do you want?” she asked as she entered the car.

Without saying anything I drove away

“where are we going?” she asked looking straight at me

I glanced at her and said

“my place”

She sat properly and faced the road before us. The car was so silent the only sound you could hear is the engine.

 After driving for 30 minutes in silence we finally arrived I turned the engine off and got out. I didn’t notice that she was already on the front door. I opened the door for her and we entered. no one is talking, she sat on the couch her eyes glued to the ground.

“was it fun?” I asked not noticing the tone of my voice

“you don’t get to ask me that” she replied looking up from the ground.

“I looked for you everywhere you might be. I drove around and run around looking for you. Only to see you laughing and having a good time with him” I blurt out in jealousy

“so you can go around your bistro kissing people and I can’t hang out with my friends?” she asked raising her hands dramatically

“I didn’t kiss anybody while you’re away, what you saw was Hailey kissing me. You clearly misunderstood” I said slightly raising my voice

“he was not just a friend to you, we both know you liked him for years” I continued

“oh no, I did not, I saw you being kissed with someone you f*****g slept with!” she said and stood from the couch

“I was feeling down and he offered to have a coffee, it was just a f*****g coffee. And yes I did like him but that was before I met you. Whom I thought changed” she continued looking at me straight in the eye

“I told you. she kissed me Brielle, SHE. KISSED. ME. I was shocked as you were” I explained and held her hand

Her expression softened as she’s looking at me

“can you be honest with me, do you still like him?” I asked not looking at her

“I don’t have to explain myself to you,” she said and her facial expression changed again

“for the past 2 weeks Kendra” 

“We have been sleeping together. we have been going out but really? What are we??” she asked looking into my eye

I leaned on the wall thinking about the last few weeks we’ve been hanging out.

“are you just going to stand there?” brie said glaring at me.

I don't know how to respond cause I don't know either. instead of answering I held her cheek, grabbed her waist and pulled her into a kiss

she instantly pushed me away followed by a slap

*PAK*

"I didn't come here for this, I want answers, Kendra. WHAT ARE WE?" she said in frustration

I lift my head and gazed at her beautiful hazel eyes

“I'm sorry” was all that left my mouth 

I grabbed her hands and squeezed them lightly 

She looked at me waiting for me to say something more but words just couldn't come out

"sorry? that is all you have to say? I'm sorry?" she shouted dramatically 

"what are you even asking sorry for? for what happened earlier? or for kiss me in the middle of this?" she continued. I could see the pain and anger in her eyes 

it hurts me seeing her in pain. it makes me mad that I can't make her feel better. 

"ALL I WANT TO KNOW IS WHAT THE f**k ARE WE?" she yelled while expressing her frustration with her hands

"I don't know" I replied and shifted my gaze on the ground

"you don't know? so that f*****g two weeks full of memories and you don't know???" she said in disbelief 

"you don't know," she said again and chuckled 

 I could hear the disappointment in her voice. I brought her hands on my lips and kissed them

“I enjoy hanging out with you, when we’re together I can be myself. I like having you around, this house feels lifeless again when you’re not here. the past two weeks was amazing trust me all the emotions and the things I said was real and I mean it” I replied again

“but I don’t think I want a relationship right now; I don’t think I can commit again” I continued

Tears started to fall down her face. she let out a loud sigh and let go of my hands

"just because someone did something bad to you doesn't mean everybody else will. it has been over a year since that happened" she said in between sobs 

I wiped her tears and pulled her in a hug. my heart is breaking every time I see her cry. I don't know what to do or say to her cause I know nothing would make her feel better 

she pulled herself from the hug and gave me a peek on my cheek. she grabbed her things and wiped her tears before facing me. she took a deep breath and smiled

seeing her smile makes me regret the things i said. i feel like a total asshole

“I guess this is it then, I’m done playing around Kendra. I want a relationship and commitment If that’s something you don’t want. I respect that” she said trying to hold her tears not to fall anymore

She turned around and headed to the front door.

i want to grab her and kiss her. i don't want her to leave but i don't want to hold her back. i just couldn't comment right now or could i.

“I wish for your happiness,” she said one last time and left.

My body slowly slides to the floor the moment she closed the door. I buried my face on my palm and let out a loud sigh

All the memories we made for the past 2 weeks came back to me. The first time we kissed. When she would play pranks on me. coming home and see her on my bed. Watching Netflix and cuddling with her every night.

“she wishes for my happiness,” I said and scoffed

I’m scared of commitment ever since the first girl I loved turned her back on me. I know being with a lesbian is tough but she promised to love me despite what I can’t give. It turned out she needs more. She left me for a guy she met at a bar. I didn’t even know she was cheating on me till I saw them f*****g on my bed at my apartment. Just remembering it still hurts me.

I opened my phone and saw my wallpaper. It’s me and Brielle on our first trip together. Then I realized

“you are my happiness, IANA BRIELLE”