I forgot my reason for suicide

crush

memorandum

After a person dies, he can no longer dream. No drowsiness, no cold feeling, no smell. There was a deathly silence all around, and there was not even a single person. Far

The lights in the dormitory building had already been turned off, and it was pitch black.

I lay on a bench in the playground, looking at the stars in the sky. The first time I kissed Yuan Li, it was also under the stars. I gently put my arms around her shoulders and kissed her lips.

At that time her bright eyes were more fascinating than the stars in the sky

people.

At that time, I was sure we were in love. But only I am sure of it.

I opened my palm, aimed at the stars in the sky, and gently tapped

hold, leaving nothing in one hand. Putting down his arms, Qian Xiaodao's stupid face suddenly appeared

my sight. I was taken aback: "You run to school in the middle of the night

What are you doing?"

..Could it be that you are worried that I will be alone, so you come here to accompany me?

Qian Xiaodao sat down next to me, panting heavily, as if he had come running.

I waited patiently for him to catch his breath, and then he said, "I forgot my schoolbag.

...can I give him a punch?

"Have you found any news?" "No. "Qian Xiaodao replied quickly.< memo

"Yuan Li, she..."

"She went home directly after school. The college entrance examination is about to take place. She must be under a lot of pressure." Qian Xiaodao interrupted me. Yuan Li's grades are among the best in the whole year, and she can be admitted to the best university in the market with her eyes closed. She has a fart pressure.

If there is nothing else, I will go home first, and I have class tomorrow. "Qian Xiaodao said cautiously.

"Get out!" I waved impatiently for him to get out of my room

line of sight.

Anyway, I'm dead.

This is a certainty, no matter how sad

Helpful. All I can do is cheer up and go... "Are you going to the girls' dormitory?!" Qian Xiaodao saw me go to the girls' dormitory.

Walking in the direction of the dormitory, I hurriedly followed behind me and yelled, "That's immoral!"

"Ethics are used to bind human beings," I rolled my eyes, "I'm dead, I don't belong to human beings, student Xiaodao.

The biggest benefit of being a ghost is that you can go to the women's bathhouse and women's dormitory without any scruples to feast your eyes. How can I wait for such a good thing?

< memo

Wait a minute!" Qian Xiaodao hurriedly stopped in front of me, his face was flushed, he took out his mobile phone from his pocket, fiddled with it for a long time, and then held it up in front of me, "I'm not going home, I'll stay here with you. You can use my mobile phone to watch the video, and I will show it to you.

The heart-piercing wailing of the heroine of the Korean drama came from the mobile phone.

Resisting the urge to be rude, I took a deep breath and said, "I want to watch football.

"But there is no live broadcast of the game...the European Cup won't be until half a month later." Qian Xiaodao said awkwardly. "I don't need you to tell me I know!"

A few days before I committed suicide, I was still discussing with my buddies whether to go to the International Plaza or go to the bar to watch it. Yuan Li scolded me for being heartless, because I was about to take the college entrance examination and didn't know how nervous I was.

I smiled and told her at the time that the only thing in this world that can make me nervous is watching football.

However, I couldn't wait until the European Cup after all.

"At that time, I will accompany you to watch the live broadcast every night," Qian Xiao

Dao held up his mobile phone and smiled at me, "I don't enjoy watching it on my mobile phone.

If so, I will steal my notebook from home. So, don't feel bad. "Which eye do you see that I am sad?" I snorted coldly, "Compared with the European Cup, you should hurry up

Find out why I killed myself.

Qian Xiaodao remained motionless, staring down at his own toes. After a while, he said: "Why... are you so sure

Are you sure you committed suicide?

I was taken aback.

"My grades are not good, my popularity is poor, and I have never made any friends since I was a child. One day, a boy in my class stole my diary and read it in public about my crush on Murong Quan. For Murong, being I like this kind of person

a disgrace, and from then on, at her sign,

The whole class started to exclude me. Qian Xiaodao said in a low voice,

Even so, I never thought about suicide. He looked up at me: "Did you really commit suicide?" I forgot many things.

But that day on the roof, it was, indeed, myself

I jumped down. Only this matter is always engraved in my mind, no matter how

Never forget anything.

"Did you find something?" I asked. Qian Xiaodao hesitated: "No."

I looked up at the starry sky: "I seem to have forgotten all the unpleasant things. I only have good memories in my mind, and there is not even a little bit of sadness. And Qian Xiaodao's responsibility is to help me find out those things that have been wronged by me."

Forgotten, buried in the darkness of the corner. "That's... very good." Qian Xiaodao said.< memo

"What a fart." I glared at him, "I have to figure out what it is that made me have to commit suicide.

At dawn the next day, Qian Xiaodao had already fallen asleep on the bench

passed. Passing students stared at him and covered their mouths with sniggering.

Just when I was about to wake him up, a bucket of water suddenly fell from the sky and splashed on Qian Xiaodao's head alive.

Murong Quan put the empty bucket aside, crossed his arms and looked at Qian Xiaodao who suddenly sat up with a jolt.

"Looking at you like this, you probably didn't go home all night, right?"

Rong Quan approached him and said softly, "So I washed it for you for free.

Take a shower, no thanks.

The onlookers burst into laughter.

"Resist me." I looked at Qian Xiaodao who was hanging his head tightly and said, "If you really like her and want to get her, then resist me." I raised my voice, "No woman likes a coward!

Qian Xiaodao looked at me helplessly, his drenched body trembling. Murong Quan and his group had already left in a big way.

I hate turning around and leaving, passing by Murong Quan

When she was at the side, she heard the girl next to her say: "Koizumi,

Are you being too cruel?" Another girl sneered: "Who told him to have unreasonable thoughts about Koizumi!< memo

"That's right, how can Qian Xiaodao compare with Senior Jiang Yang.

Murong Quan stopped suddenly, stared at the girl who just said the word Jiang Yang with a downcast face, and said coldly: "Who is allowed to mention it?"

His name?"

I stared at Murong Quan's face, my head was spinning rapidly, and then I woke up suddenly with a click.

No wonder she felt familiar when I saw her in the equipment room that day.

She is the legendary "tail".

She is always secretly following me, wears hairpins of different colors every day, and is ridiculed by my buddies as my loyal tail high school girl.

When I was alive, I never cared about her. Just think of me as a nympho little girl. Occasionally, when I turned around and saw her figure, I just frowned and continued to do what I should do.

Didn't even remember her face.

I smacked my lips, turned around, and saw Qian Xiaodao, who was eager to catch up with me, standing behind Murong Quan in a daze.

【Crush lover】

Murong Quan likes Jiang Yang.

Murong Quan likes Jiang Yang.

Murong Quan likes Jiang Yang.

"How long are you going to be in a daze?" Jiang Yang interrupted my meditation impatiently.< memo

I came back to my senses, now I am in physical education class, and the students in the class are teaming up to practice basketball, and I stand as usual

In the corner only for viewing. "How is your basketball?" Jiang Yang asked. “………… I haven’t fought.”

The corner of Jiang Yang's mouth twitched: "Are you still a man? I silently lowered my head.

Hold your head up and look at me. "Jiang Yang strode towards the playground, doing the movement of hitting the ball, leaped in the air, and did it.

A standard shooting stance.

If he has the ball in his hand, it must hit the red frame.

But he could no longer hold the ball.

"As I demonstrated just now, you can do it again." Jiang

Yang ordered.

..huh?" I stood still.

"Hold yourself and practice again."

I picked up the ball on the ground honestly, imitated his posture just now, and threw the basketball to the basketball hoop awkwardly. ——He hit Murong Quan on the head.

"Good job!" Jiang Yang gave a thumbs up. With a sad face, I watched Murong Quan stare at me with a murderous look, and smashed the basketball hard into my face.

So I was pushed into the equipment room and locked up for another noon. That afternoon.

"Everyone put away the books on the table, and the exam begins.< memo

I looked at the head teacher holding the test paper in astonishment, and suddenly woke up that today is the day of the monthly test!

Since Jiang Yang appeared, I have never seriously reviewed it.

I looked resentfully at Jiang who was sitting on the podium with his legs crossed

Yang, he gloated and said, "Sorrows will change." I continued to look at him resentfully.

He jumped off the desk, looked around the classroom and asked, "Which one is the best in your class?"

I quietly pointed to the study committee member sitting in the first row. He leaned on the desk of the study committee member, stared at his test paper, and said, "Pick up your pen, and I will start reporting the answers."

up. "......Isn't this not good?

I hesitated, and then imagined what would happen if I failed the exam, so I immediately picked up the pen and waited impatiently.

Follow Jiang Yang to report the answer.

After the exam with excitement and guilt, I expressed my sincere thanks to Jiang Yang.

He nodded in satisfaction and said, "If I really want to thank you, I'll go find Mu

Rong Quan is close. "Huh!?" I was shocked.

"That girl is a stalker, she often follows my ass, she should know something about it." Jiang Yang had a thoughtful expression.

I did not tell Jiang Yang about Yuan Li and the yellow-haired young man.

Because it's cruel to tell a dead person "You were dumped by your girlfriend and you seemed to be driven to death by your rival"

Tolerance.

Obviously as long as you tell him the truth, you can get rid of his

Entangled.

Obviously at the beginning, she was still so afraid of his existence. What am I hesitating about.

So that you won't be alone the next time you're locked in the equipment room? So that you won't be standing alone in gym class?

Corner? To have someone to rely on when being bullied

Like? In order to be able to pass the exam?

In order to let him bring good memories, carefree

stay by your side

I nodded and said, "Understood." Jiang Yang raised his eyebrows, as if surprised that I would agree: "You didn't refuse?"

"The sooner you figure out everything, the sooner you can end your wish to be reincarnated." I said.

Jiang Yang didn't say a word, and stopped following me, because the school gate was ahead.

I looked back at him, he had his hands in his pockets, with an indifferent expression on his face.

I braced myself and smiled at him: "Do you have any books you want to read? I'll buy them and bring them to school tomorrow.Jiang Yang snorted coldly: "I don't like reading books." "Then comics?"

Jiang Yang pondered for a while, then replied: "Download Sora Aoi

to your mobile phone......" Before he finished speaking, I turned around and walked out embarrassingly

school gate.

As soon as I went out, I saw Murong walking alone on the road

spring.

She is wearing a green hairpin today.

I bit the bullet and approached her, and said falteringly: "Squad, squad leader, I want to ask you......

"Get out of my sight!" Murong Quan said mercilessly without even looking at me.

I want to ask you something about Jiang Yang!" I said in one breath

come out.

If Murong Quan had sulfuric acid in his hands now, he probably would have never

Hesitation poured on me.

Before the volcano erupted, I continued, "Do you know the reason why Jiang Yang committed suicide?"

With a straight face, she said, "I'll let you go.

"Is it related to Jiang Yang's girlfriend, Yuan Li?" I continued to ask without fear of boiling water, and bumped into someone head-on. I apologized repeatedly, but when I looked up, I found that the person I bumped into was actually Yuan Li.

She didn't even look at me and kept walking.

"Murderer." Murong Quan beside him suddenly muttered.sentence.

Yuan Li stopped, turned around and looked at Murong Quan: "You saidWhat?"

"She...she is chatting with me!" I stood in front of Murong Quan, with a smile on my face.

"I saw you at the bar that day." Yuan Li looked at me coldly, "Are you following me?"

I faltered: "I saw you hugging a young man with yellow hair....

"So what?" Yuan Li said impatiently.

Before I could speak, Murong Quan rushed up and pushed Yuan Li, scolding sharply: "Senior ran into you by accident that day.

With Huang Mao, he went up to pull you away, but you slapped the senior and let Huang Mao make fun of him. I saw it with my own eyes! You broke the heart of the senior and killed Jiang.

Senior! Shameless b***h!

I feel cold.

Sure enough, without saying a word, Yuan Li grabbed Murong Quan's collar and was about to slap him. I quickly grabbed Yuan Li's arm, and she punched me in the face, and I fell to the ground unsteadily.

"It's wrong for you to do that," I said, covering my face, "don't you feel guilty about him?"

"Guilty?" Yuan Li's eyes were cold, "Why should I feel guilty for a coward? Just because of his girlfriend's betrayal, he jumped off the building and committed suicide in despair. Such a coward is not worthy of my feelings. It would be naive to get my sympathy and guilt.

"And even if I feel guilty, so what? Everyone is dead, and the dead cannot see the joys and sorrows of the living.

Even if you come to confront me now because of him

If you are angry, you will eventually forget him one day, completely forget him. So save it all.

"I won't forget my senior!" Murong Quan shouted unconvinced. Yuan Li looked up and down at Murong Quan, who was a head shorter than himself, and raised the corners of his mouth mockingly: "If I remember correctly, you are the follower who often follows Jiang Yang, right? It seems that you should be very infatuated with Jiang Yang, but he Where did you go the day you jumped off the building? Why didn't you follow him? Murong Quan's eyes froze and he didn't make a sound.

"Stupid." Yuan Li dropped the word in disgust, and left without looking back.

Murong Quan looked around, picked up a brick and was about to chase after her, I quickly got up from the ground and grabbed her, saying: "Forget it."

"f**k your mother!" She pushed me away fiercely, "When will it be your turn to control me, you bastard?"

"...Sorry." I whispered. "I'm so sorry." Murong Quan burst into tears

"I will never forget him, I will never forget." I reached out to pat her on the shoulder, but finally let it go.

"I originally wanted to follow him that day. I knew he was sad, and I really wanted to comfort him, but he suddenly turned around and told me not to follow me."

"I thought I was hated, so I stopped following him." "That was the last time he spoke to me."

If I keep following, maybe I can give him a hand, maybe he won't die. " "I shouldn't have stopped." "Murong Quan tightly covered his face, eyes

Tears flowed from my fingers, "I shouldn't have stopped. I took out a pack of tissues from my schoolbag and reached out to her. She didn't pick it up as I expected, but knocked it out hard. I picked it up and dropped it. The tissue on the floor continued to pass it to her.

She knocked it out again. I picked it up again.

With a dark face, she took out a tissue, wiped her tears, and said, "If you dare to tell what happened today, you will be killed."

you. " "Um. ' I whispered.

The two of us stood in the street in embarrassment, one was crying, the other was bruised and swollen, all for the same person. That person should be very lonely now, right?