It’s always been you

Chapter #2

When I made it to the porch and went to unlock the door, I found that it was already open… he was inside, waiting for me.

I swallowed back the panic that had started to build in my throat and I pushed my way inside. It was very quiet and I didn’t see him in the living room, so where was he?

Thankfully the door was quiet so I didn’t alert him to my entrance. Maybe I could use the downstairs bathroom to quickly freshen up my face and make me somewhat more presentable before I ran into him. This was good. The bright lights and thick air in school always made my skin feel gross, like I needed a shower as soon as I got home to wash off the day.

I tried to walk as lightly as possible while half running at the same time to the bathroom down the hall. Grabbing the handle I swung open the door to… it was him.

It was him, it was ELIAS and he was going to the bathroom. Why didn’t he lock it!? His- oh my goodness, his…

I turned around so fast and sprinted in the opposite direction back towards the front of the house.

“Adeline! s**t!” His voice… I haven’t heard his voice in so long, it pulled at my gut in a way I had forgotten it could do. My heart thrashed in my chest as I came to an abrupt halt before reaching the front door again. Where was I trying to go?

“Addie! I’m so sorry!” He was in the hallway walking towards me. I was too stunned to turn around yet. I had seen his… I couldn’t even THINK the word and I could feel my cheeks turning bright red. I had always wanted to, I always wondered.

“I lost track of time, I didn’t think you’d be home so early. I should have locked the door, s**t I’m so sorry Addie….”

The guilt in his voice made me need to turn around to face him. He looked so damn good. Just gazing at his face made me want to cry from the sheer joy I felt seeing it after so long.

He was the most handsome and well put together man I had ever seen in my entire life. Deep green eyes, jet black hair slicked back so perfectly. A small chunk of hair had fallen free down his forehead, almost like he did it on purpose. His jaw was sharp and covered in stubble. That stubble surrounded his plump, deep pink lips. Not too big, more red than pink really. Almost like he had been kissing someone or something…

Again I pictured him in the bathroom and I bit my lip. His eyes caught the motion before shooting back up to mine. I could have sworn they darkened just a little bit.

“It’s f-fine. I… I didn’t think you’d be here until later. Mom said you were coming to eat…”

“I got here earlier than I planned and your dad let me stop by his office for his keys. I’m staying here tonight since…” He paused suddenly. “I’m staying here since I’ll be in town for the weekend, I’m going to stay in the guest room.” The guest room was right beside my room.

And why was he here all of a sudden? Especially after five years of no communication. “Oh.. cool. What are you in town for?”

He bit his lip this time and I let out a weird, soft sigh. This wasn’t good. I didn’t know how to act around him anymore. Or control myself was the better word. I used to be really good at it because I had to be.

Thankfully, he ignored the noise. “I, uhm.. I really don’t want to lie to you Adeline. I feel like you deserve the truth but it’s not my place to say. Your parents need to be here.”

I wasn’t expecting such a weird response and all that I could do was just stare at him as my heart continued to beat out of control. We both stared at each other in the awkward silence, our eyes never leaving each other. He had never looked at me the way he was looking at me right now and it was making me feel incredibly hot.

He was big… down there and I couldn’t stop thinking about it as I looked at him. Everything in this moment was incredibly overwhelming. The way he was acting, the response he gave me. I had no time to even try and prepare myself to see him again and I didn’t know what to do next. What to say next.

“I missed you. You’ve grown up to be such a beautiful woman, Adeline. I never stopped thinking about you all of these years. I’m sorry I stopped coming around. Your parents had their business and I had mine. I’m not leaving again, you have my word.” He was always around when my parents weren’t. Looking after me and making sure I had what I needed. In a weird way he was like another dad or a big brother but not… just someone who cared more about me than any family ever did.

“I missed you too…” My voice was quiet and I couldn’t bring myself to look at his face as I said it. I admired his crisp navy suit and tie. He always dressed nice, I had only ever seen him in casual clothes a handful of times and never in pajamas.

“Hey…” Suddenly he was right in front of me and the smell of his warm cologne enveloped my senses and I wanted to moan but I refrained. His hand gently grabbed my chin and tilted my face to his. Our eyes locked and my breath caught in my throat. “I mean it, sweetheart. I’m never leaving you again.” His voice was quieter and gentler as he spoke again. His hand stayed on my chin and I couldn’t move.

“Elias!” Moms voice boomed from the porch as she stepped through the front door. Immediately he let go of my chin and I turned. “Mrs. Ryan!” He swiftly moved past me and I watched them meet each other and hug tightly.

“Elias, I think you know you should be calling me Samantha now. Always so polite and proper. It’s so good to see you again!”

They both chuckled as they let each other go and then turned towards me. “Adeline, isn't it so nice to see Elias again? I bet you missed him didn’t you?” Her smile was genuine and her eyes sparkled. It was rare to see my mom so positive and radiant and it tugged on my heart, reminding me that she never had one just for me anymore.

“Yes. I missed him a lot. It’s really nice, mom.”

“See? This will be great for all of us Elias, Anthony always has Adeline’s best interest at heart.”

What in the world? Why was everyone using such particular words that I couldn’t understand? What will be great for all of us? What interests was my mother talking about?

“I’m missing something…” My voice was quiet again but both mom and Elias looked at me with caution in their eyes. Elias’s brow knit and my mom pursed her lips.

“Oh, your father doesn’t need to be here. I can tell you just as well on my own. We have a great opportunity Adeline. Your father and I are going to open our own law firm. It’s going to take a lot of time, effort and money. You’re going to stay here in Maine with Elias and me and your father will be moving to Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. Harrisburg is a perfect place to open our firm. The market is booming right now and here in Cumberland… well it’s too small for what we want to do. You love small towns and your quiet so we refuse to take it away from you, Adeline. Elias can work from anywhere and he’s happy to stay with you. You can finish your senior year and when you decide where you want to go to college, your father and I will come back and visit, help out… it’ll be great, you’ll see.”

For a moment my ears started to ring and then the noise calmed to a dull humming, followed by the sound of my heartbeat gently in the background. My mother didn’t even take a pause to see if I wanted to say anything. This was happening and I didn’t have a say. They didn’t care about leaving me. Again, they only cared about work and this new business they wanted to open.

Now that I was eighteen it seemed they didn’t care about any parental duties or even being with me to help me transition into really living an adult life. Instead they were just throwing me on Elias and he… he agreed.

This is what he meant by ‘I’m never leaving you again.’ Why had he agreed to this? He was literally putting his life on pause for me… he really didn’t mind but why? No one does that. Sure he had been with me all my life and actually cared about me but this was a huge sacrifice.

“Addie? Addie, are you okay, sweetheart?” Elias spoke up, bringing me out of the endless thoughts and questions running rampant in my mind.

“I… yeah. I-I’m okay. But why would you stay with me?” I looked directly at him and my mom huffed dramatically and spoke before he could answer.

“Because he cares about you Adeline. He cares about your father and this family. He’s a good man. Don’t make this difficult, it’s completely unnecessary. This is happening, period. End of discussion. I’m going to the kitchen to start dinner.” She quickly moved past both Elias and I without another glance at either of us.

To be completely honest, I didn’t actually care that my parents wanted to leave me. I was concerned with the position they were putting Elias in. I know he agreed but he most likely only did it out of loyalty to my father.

He was a businessman too. Successful and single. Free to do whatever he wanted, go wherever he wanted. Why would he want to look after an eighteen year old high school student?

“Addie, I want to be here with you. Stop overthinking this. I know you and I know you’re freaking out right now. This was my idea.”

I couldn’t help the little gasp that broke free from my lips as my eyes met his once again. “Your father called me for advice on starting up this business with your mom and I immediately thought of you. Having to move now, settle into a place you don’t know with parents who don’t look after you. I couldn’t imagine you being alone like that. I know how much you like the quiet and I know how much you love this town. I can work from anywhere and if I ever have to travel, you can come with me but we will always come back here and I will always keep you safe.”

He was the only man who had ever cared so deeply for me. No one else knew me like he did, or respected how I felt about anything like he did. Yes, he was the most attractive man I had ever seen. Yes he was the most beautiful, intelligent human I had ever known but it was so much more than that. He actually saw me for who I really was. I thought my parents had scared him away forever but he had never stopped caring for or thinking about me.

He saw me as a daughter or a sister I’m sure. My feelings would never be returned by him but I could make this work. As long as I could have him in my life, I could be content… I had to be.

“Okay. I believe you. Let’s do this.” My voice was shaky and still incredibly quiet. He would always make me nervous, I was sure of it. Maybe with time, it would be easier to talk to him or find more words to say. He made me feel safe, loved, cared about and nervous all at once and it actually felt really good.

The grin he gave me made my knees feel weak. For a small moment he bit his bottom lip again and I couldn’t look away.

“Good, cause I’m already moved in. I’m sorry I lied about getting here a little early. I arrived right after you left for school. Please forgive me, sweetheart. That will be the last lie I ever tell you.”