Greyson

Chapter Eleven

I had left Greyson's apartment before the birds started chirping, I quietly made myself a quick coffee because I seriously wasn't a morning person and watched the sunrise from the panoramic glass windows. 

I left quietly without waking him up, I couldn't speak to him because I wouldn't trust what I would say. The best solution to this was for me to leave and pretend like this was a nightmare. 

Linda the crabby watch dog down at the reception area looked at me distastefully as I walked by in nothing but a shirt and the sandals I was wearing yesterday. I tried to find the sundress from yesterday but I couldn't, assuming it was in the room that Grey was sleeping in, I left refusing to enter that territory. 

I got a cab but to my apartment and now here I was, curled on my sofa and looking at four walls. Overthinking as I normally do. 

I decided tonight that I was going to fly back home, I knew my parents had returned home from vacation and it's been a long minute since I seen them. In the space of two days, I had royally f****d everything up. 

Maybe a blessing, maybe a nightmare who knows. 

At the age of twenty four, I felt like I had the weight of the world on my shoulders. I wanted to please my Dad and make him proud of me but in the same breath, I wanted to be happy. Publishing doesn't make me happy. I wanted to do something that made me feel involved on the outside as well as contributing to the inside. So when Charlie text to tell me there will be a family dinner come Sunday, I was going to tell my Dad that this isn't something that I wish to do anymore. I could only hope that he's supportive and if he's not, he'll just need to get on board with the idea. 

Next, New York. Did I want to stay here? Yes and No. In the space of a few years, the only friends I have made was those who worked for me. They weren't nice because I was their friend, they were nice because I was their boss. I wanted to be at home, maybe invest my time in a new house that actually had a back and front garden, maybe buy a dog and be surrounded by country side. Ontario gave me that. 

So because I was making such major decisions, I've decided that once things are cleared up with the publishing aspect, I would sell my apartment. I'll probably come back to New York but shopping trips only as nothing else compares. 

This was a new chapter and I was going to go into it with my head cleared and head raised. Hence why Charlie is coming around in ten minutes. 

I'll explain to him what happened and hope for the best, one thing I did know was that I didn't want this relationship to continue, that I was certain of. 

I quickly showered again when I got home, it helped wake me up a little. I got changed into grey sweatpants and a pink hooded top that was slightly oversized and this time I was definitely wearing underwear. 

"Penny for your thoughts?" Charlie's quiet voice asked from beside me, he looked flushed and shy like a school boy. 

"You'd need a lot of pennies for that." I smiled looking at his flustered appearance, he too was dressed down in jeans and casual black tee. 

"We need to talk." He told me perching himself on the arm of my cosy black sofa. 

"Where would you like to start" I asked nervously, pulling on the sleeves of my pullover. 

"You slept with Greyson?" He asked. 

"I did." I replied back truthfully. 

I looked to Charlie's face expecting him to be devastated but that wasn't the case, he almost looked relieved which someone irked me. 

"I have something to tell you." He almost stuttered out, " Do you remember Jesse? The gir.."

"Your assistant? I remember her." I told him with a raised eyebrow feeling my heart slightly race in my chest. 

"When you went home at Easter, we went out and had a few drinks. Things from there became a little complex." He told me with flushed cheeks. 

"Complex how?" I almost snapped. 

"We slept together." He winced, "If wasn't that once and you know she's a really bright, intelligent and smart girl. She's amazing. I never planned to intentionally hurt you but she's.."

"I went home for Easter five months ago Charlie. You've been sleeping with your assistant behind my back for five months?" I felt myself getting angrier, you could tell his feelings were much deeper for her than a one night stand. He was boasting about her to me of all people, his girlfriend that he cheated on. 

You cheated on him too. I sighed feeling my anger settle, I had wronged him as he wronged me. We were both in the wrong. 

"Maybe what we had, it wasn't what we both needed." I told him finally speaking up, "It would explain why we gravitated to others." I told him as he smiled slightly. 

"I wanted to tell you Emily...I just, I didn't have it in me to hurt you and then when I found out about Greyson. I know that somewhere deep inside, you must have felt the same way." I smiled back at his truth, the truth was that because we simply didn't want to hurt each other we kept quiet. 

"I didn't want to hurt you either." I told him with a small smile. 

"Your the best and I couldn't live in this world if I didn't have your friendship at the minimum." He countered, "Can we still be friends?" Can ex's be friends? 

When I think of Charlie there is nothing, no love that makes me want to cry at the thought of not seeing him again but I smiled at his compromise. 

"Friends we are." I told him with a smile causing him to smile back. 

"Remember Grey Lightning is still my favourite band, I hope when you marry Grey I'll be at that celebrity filled wedding." He grinned while I winced, yeah that was never going to happen in this lifetime. Maybe in my dreams who knows. 

"Well remember your still my friend, when you make an honest woman of Jesse, I hope I can be there." I told him quickly to change the subject. 

"Deal." He grinned. 

"Deal." 

I had spent the latter part of my afternoon packing my suitcase for heading home. I quickly tidied and cleaned my apartment and ordered myself some takeout. If I eat before the flight, I'll sleep like a baby. 

I would be home for a week and in that week, I will hopefully find myself a pretty little home. If I could get the ball rolling with that, when I come back here next week, I can get a start on packing and clearing up last minute things in the office. Two weeks and hopefully, I'll be settled back at home. 

Once I get everything sorted out with a new house, I'll decide what I want to do with work. I had savings so I was in no rush, the sound of a little gap year was intriguing but as someone who likes to be constantly on the go, I can't see that happening. 

I walked towards my apartment door after hearing two sharp knocks, my stomach rumbled on instinct and my mouth salivated at the thought of food. 

I swung the door open, cash in hand. 

"Keep it princess, dinner is on me." I snapped my eyes up to Benny standing neatly in blue denim jeans and a pink shirt with the sleeves rolled up. 

"Benny Hi." I stammered out, "Come in." I ushered with my hand as I opened the door further with a small smile. 

He walked over placing the food on my breakfast bar. He stood there for a second and sighed before turning to face me as the door closed. 

"We need to talk." He looked flustered, on Benny it was almost comical as he flipped his hair neatly to the side. "I don't know what happened yesterday but Grey is a moody b***h today, I tried making him his favourite pancakes and the plate hit the wall." He whined, "normally they always work." He whispered our defeated at the end. 

I giggled at his demeanour, a beautiful and tall drama queen. 

"I haven't spoken to him since last night so it's nothing to do with me." I told him raising my hands defensively. 

"Well technically it is because he's been like that since the moment he woke up." He sighed, "We had press interviews today so I got to his apartment early, he almost pranced on me when I came out the elevator looking like a mad man. He asked if I seen you, I told him no and that was it. Hell met earth." He rushed out with a frown. 

"Well I spoke to Grey last night and trust me, he made it perfectly clear that he wanted me gone. I left at 6am and I wasn't in the mood to have another showdown so I left." I told him with a shrug, heading over to my food and slowly opening the bag. 

"You need to be careful Emily, he likes you." I laughed brushing off his statement. 

"Trust me he made it perfectly clear he didn't." I told him bashfully, "I honestly don't understand him Benny." I added letting out a frustrated sigh, "He's fine with me one minute then the next it's like he see's red and the s**t hits the fan." I told him stopping for a second to gather my thoughts before looking up to him, he was giving me a look half between a smile and a frown. 

"He's been through a lot these past two years." He told me quietly, taking a seat on one of my stools. "I don't think it's anything to do with you, he just struggles with trust." I locked my eyes with him. 

"Why does he struggle with trust?" I asked curiously. This was new to me, Grey had never mentioned anything and if he struggled with trust I had never really paid attention to notice this. 

"It's complicated." He told me firmly, "It's a sensitive subject with us all, he's like our brother and if you see him as a brother you shouldn't betray his trust." He told me looking behind him checking out the rest of my open living area. 

"So someone who he's close with then?" I asked with narrowed eyes trying to figure this out. He said brother, so maybe a best friend perhaps? 

"Something like that." He murmured out, "The problem is though is that Grey has a big heart, he's not one to hold grudges and when the betrayal happened...he kept it under wraps, he didn't want anyone to know or find out and still to this day he takes the blame for a situation that he never caused."   I pushed my food to the side suddenly not interested, I was too bothered about the fact that someone would take his trust for granted. 

Maybe I was a little too harsh on him last night. Clearly he has issues that run a lot deeper than anything I could imagine. It hurt to know that someone caused the way he behaved. He wasn't trying to be mean but it was clearly his defence mechanism going up, he wanted to protect himself. 

"So when you say betrayal of trust...how bad was it?"I asked causing him to thin his lips with an unsure swirl in his eyes. 

"Really bad." Benny admitted, "You have to understand Emily, this person was family to Grey. If he had asked for help he would have got it but he went dirty and released s**t to the tabloids." I frowned and felt myself getting more frustrated as the minutes went on. 

Grey had someone betray him and his trust and he covered it up and made it look like nothing happened. Clearly this was big enough to make him question his trust with everyone else and for some unbeknownst reason, it bothered me. It made me angry that someone would do such a thing to him. I for one certainly wouldn't keep my mouth closed or cover it up, clearly they weren't worthy of his time and he needs to cut them loose. 

"Who?" I almost demanded causing Benny to look to the floor with sadness and guilt in his eyes. 

"I can't tell you Emily." He replied quietly. 

"If you want me to help Grey then you need to talk Benny. I'm not havi-"

"Your Brother." I stilled heading my heart beat in my ears, "Jase." He confirmed. 

"What?!"