Piece De Resistance

18

Two months being together is not enough for me.

Two months being together is not enough for me.

My brow furrowed trying to read his face. If he's joking or not. He didn't smile nor avoiding my gazes.

Derechong nakatitig siya sa mga mata. As if he wanted to show me that he is f*****g serious on what he said.

Bumaba ang tingin ko sa suot niya, he's wearing the same outfit when he was still working for me as my driver.

Grey shirt and maong pants. His usual daily outfit. The only thing that made me remember his past mistake, was when I saw his luxurious watch.

I licked my lips before bitting my lower lip.

Napagtanto ko na hindi na siya ang driver ko noon, instead he is someone who has the power in this society. Someone who is out of my league.

Nag angat ako ng tingin. He looked at me worriedly. Did he notice how my mood changes?

Two months?

Ganon katagal ko siyang nakasama. Hindi makakaila na pakiramdam ko ilang araw ko lang siya nakasama.

Siguro 'yon ang sinasabi ng karamihan, na sa tuwing kasama mo ang taong mahalaga sa'yo ay hindi mo na namamalayan ang pag takbo ng oras.

And that made me realize something.

I survived my first semester during my senior year at ease when Ford was still working for me.

Paano ko nagawa ang lahat ng report papers ko sa school, sa kumpanya at ang pag gawa ko ng artwork piece ng sabay sabay sa mga panahong 'yon.

That was my heaviest and busiest year. Iniisip ko pa lang ay napapagod na ako.

I did all of that because of him, who was silently my support system that time.

Halo halo ang emosyon na nararamdaman ko ngayon nung naalala ko ang maamong mukha niya habang tahimik siyang nag hihintay sa coffee shop.

My days were perfect with him. Our visits in an art exhibits. Even when he was just giving his honest judgement on my newly made art piece. Those might seems so small but that made me really happy.

Ang hinihiling ko lang nung mga panahong 'yon siguro ay ang masabi ko sa kanya ang totoo kong nararamdaman. Kung gaano ko siya kamahal. I couldn't ask for more that time.

I loved him.. so much that it breaks my heart right now seeing him sitting infront of me.

Unti unti siyang naging malabo sa aking paningin. Nag babadya na ang mga luha na lumabas.

I can't stay close to him. I'm weak when he's around. Tila ba wala ako sa sariling katinuan kapag kausap ko siya.

Why is he here at the first place? Does he wanted to fix the string between us that he broke? Or he just wants to personally see me hurt?

Kaya bago pa ako tuluyang maiyak sa harapan niya, dali dali kong kinuha ang macbook at ipad ko sa mesa, walang pasabi na tumayo at tumakbo palabas ng dinning area.

Ilang ulit kong pinindot ang elevator button. Takot na baka habulin niya ako hanggang dito.

Thankfully he didn't. Kasabay ng pag pasok ko sa lift ay ang pag patak ng aking luha.

Gamit ang likod ng aking palad, mabilis kong pinawi 'yon.

"Stop being a crybaby Nikka." I murmured before pressing the correct floor of my hotel room.

Mas lalo akong naiinis sa sarili nung nakita ko ang aking repleksyon sa harapan. Walang tigil ang pag luha at sobrang pula na ng mukha.

Kasalanan ko ba na hindi ko siya pinatawad at tinanggap nung pumunta siya sa bahay namin kasama ng pamilya niya?

If I did forgive him, magiging masaya ba kami pareho?

Will I accept the marriage that both of our parents plan?

Oo mahal ko siya pero ang tiwala ko para sa kanya at para sa pamilya niya ang nasira.

I'm scared that if I forgave him that time and continued my relationship with him, might hurt him more in the future.

Even though he has no intention of lying. I might still doubt him. Which is unfair.. He deserved to be heard and believed, but that time 'till now i'm not ready to do that.

Suminghap ako at muling pinalis ang mga luha.

"You did the right thing Nikka." paulit ulit kong sinasabi habang papalabas ng elevator.

Hindi ko na inabala ang sariling pawiin ang mga luhang pumapatak ng tuluyan akong nakapasok sa aking silid.

Hinayaan ko ang sarili na umiyak ng umiyak hanggang sa natulugan ko na.

Nagising na magaan ang pakiramdam. Tumayo ako sa higaan at tumungo sa bathroom.

I'd like to soak my whole body in a bathtub to relax.

Isang oras din akong nanatili sa banyo habang tanaw ang magagandang lungsod ng Iloilo.

Iloilo is one of the peaceful and beautiful city that I witness in this country, wherein that the past meets the present.

The city's progressive development led a lot of opportunities to the Ilonggos.

Pagkatapos kong maligo ay ibinigay ko naman ang buong atensyon ko sa emails at trabaho hanggang sa dumating na ang oras na pupunta ako sa bahay nina Que.

I did a light make up, para pag takpan ang namumugto kong mga mata mula sa pag iyak.

I'm wearing a pink floral knee length wrap dress and a pair of sandals. I also added some hair clips to add volume in my outfit.

Tumayo ako at kinuha ang aking slingbag.

I stepped backward and face the small vanity table, to check my outfit for the last time.

Taas noo akong nag lalakad palabas ng hotel. I'll ride a taxi for convenience and safety.

Sa labas ako ng subdivision nila bababa. Maraming pasikot sikot kasi ang subdivision nila kaya baka malito 'raw ang taxi driver kapag mag papahatid pa ako mismo sa labas ng bahay nila.

Lola Celia will fetch me outside of their subdivision, since nasa trabaho pa ata si Que sa oras na dadating ako.

But I stopped walking in the middle when I saw him standing near the glass door. Both hands were hidden inside his pockets.

Compare to me, he was much more aware that he'll meet me here. Para bang sa reaksyon na ipinapakita niya ay nag sasabing hinintay niya talagang dumating ako dito.

Dahan dahan niyang nilakad ang distansya na meron kami, habang ako naman ay hindi ko kayang umalis o gumalaw man lang sa kinatatayuan ko. Naninigas, hindi alam kung ano ang tamang gawin.

I never tore my sight off him as he was closer to me. Tila naging tahimik ang buong paligid, pawang ang pag t***k na lang ng aking puso ang naririnig sa mga panahong ito.

"Nikka.." tawag niya sa pangalan ko. "I'm sorry for what happened earlier. I didn't intend to ruin your meal."

I wanted to push him away from me once again, but why would I do it?

I can't always avoid him, lalong lalo na't sila ang hahawak ng bagong branch namin. Our path will always meet.

Tumango ako imbes na sagutin siya. Pagod ng makipagtalo at maiyak sa bandang huli.

"Excuse me.." sabi ko bago nag lakad muli palabas ng lobby.

Two of the security guards bow down their head a bit when they saw me.

"Good afternoon ma'am. Taxi?" nakangiting saad nung isang guard.

"Yes please." sagot ko naman.

"Naku ma'am makulimlim ang panahon ngayon, baka mahirapan tayo mag hanap ng taxi." ani naman nung isa. "Friday pa naman at rush hour."

Kinabahan ako sa sinabi ng security guard. My eyes flickered as I looked at the main road.

Hindi pa umuulan ngunit kapansin pansin ang madilim na kalangitan.

Sana pala maaga akong umalis kanina.

Pano ba to? Hindi ko naman pwedeng bigla icancel ang dinner namin dahil paniguradong nag handa si lola Celia ng pagkain.

"Need a ride?" I almost punch someone when I heard his voice.

"Sorry did I scare you?" habol pa niya

Hindi pa kumalma ang dibdib ko nang hinarap ko siya at sinuntok sa braso.

"Ohh" impit ko sabay hawak sa kamay kong ginamit.

I don't know how he reacted quickly to protect himself. Sa ginawa ko, ako pa ang nasaktan.

"Hey, are you okay?" nag aalalang tanong niya atsaka hinawakan ang kamay ko.

"Don't touch me!" sabay bawi.

Dahil sa kahihiyan, humarap ako sa ibang direksyon. I pursed my lips and close my eyes tightly.

Did I just punch a wall? Ang sakit!

I shake my hand before hiding it behind.

Nilingon ko siya, masama ang tingin.

"Aalis ka? Do you need a ride?" may pag aalinlangan sa mukha ngunit tinuloy pa'rin niya ang gustong sabihin.

"Oo bakit? May kotse ka ba?"

I almost rolled my eyes when

he scratch his nape.

Tatanong pa, wala namang may magagawa. Tsk.

"I have my car, maybe I can give you a ride or something."

Medjo nagulat ako 'don sa sinabi niya, at nag dalawang isip kung maniniwala ba ako o hindi.

But before I could speak, he pulls out a key behind his pocket.

"May sasakyan ka dito?" hindi ko mapigilan na hindi magulat sa nakikita "Or did you just rent a car while you're staying here?"

I really don't think that it is a nice idea buying a new car in this city. Yes, he have an on-going project here but it is just temporary. Aalis at aalis pa'rin siya.

"Just our company extra car. It is better to have something to use while i'm here." aniya "so--"

Nag dadalawang isip pa sana ako kung tatanggapin ko ang alok niya, ngunit ang mas nangingibabaw ang takot na baka kung gaano ako katagal mag hintay dito ng taxi ay ganon din ang ikakatagal ng paghihintay sa'kin ni lola sa labas ng subdivision nila.

"Sige.."

Bahagya pa siyang natigilan at namilog ang kanyang mga mata nung narinig ang pag payag ko.

Gusto kong matawa. Pero baka isipin niyang gusto kong makasama siya kaya wag na lang. I did this because of lola Celia, not for him.

"A-ano? Ihahatid mo ba ako o mag tataxi na lang ako?" I crossed my arms above my chest after.

"Ihahatid.." he huskily said before he tilted his head to the left where the parking lot of this hotel can be found.

Tahimik akong nakasunod sa kanya. Looking at his wide masculine back, like movies, a lot of memories flashed in my mind.

Him walking while my bag is on his shoulder. This became his routine when he knew that my bag were heavy. Everytime he fetch me, kinukuha niya kaagad sa'kin ang mga dala ko at siya na mismo ang mag bitbit ne'to hanggang sa kotse.

Likod pa lang niya, marami na akong alaala na kasama siya.

I bit my lip and took a deep breath before I looked away when I felt something building up in my throat.

Mahirap na baka bigla na naman akong maiyak habang inaalala ang mga panahong masaya pa ang lahat.

Mas binilisan ko lalo ang paglalakad para mahabol ko siya.

He stopped in a white honda civic car. He pressed his car keys before opening the shotgun seat's door.

Tiningnan ko ang pinto bago mula ulo ko siya pinagmasdan.

Ba't niya ako pinagbuksan ng pinto? Does he wanted me to sit besides him?

Tinaasan ko siya ng isang kilay?

Dream on Montenegro!!

"Tsk!" sabi ko bago binuksan ang pinto ng passenger seat at walang pasabing agad na sinara ito.

Nang nakaupo, nanatili pa'rin ang tingin ko sa kanya. Ilang segundo pa ang nakalipas bago niya tahimik na sinara ang pinto ng kotse.

Tila hindi inakala na hindi ako tatabi sa kanya buong biyahe.

Mabilis ang lakad niya papunta sa driver's seat.

Nang makaupo, mabilis niyang pinaandar ang sasakyan habang ang isang kamay niya naman ay abala sa pag hila ng seatbelt. It is his routine before driving.

I immediately took off my sight on him when he saw me looking at him through the rear view mirror.

He cleared his throat habang nakatingin naman ako sa labas. Nasa basement pa'rin kami ng hotel kaya maliban sa mga sasakyan wala na akong magandang tanawin na makikita.

"Nikka.."aniya. Dahan dahan ko siyang nilingon. I shifted in my seat when our eyes meet. "Where's the location?"

"Savannah."

I saw him brow furrowed.

"Do you know someone living there?"

Unti unti na niyang sinimulan ang pag dridrive.

"Oo.. Si lola Celia." I paused for a while "Que wanted to start a new life here with lola Celia. I bought their home as a token of gratitude for their service and loyalty towards my family."