On the Other Side

"Promises aren't meant to be broken. If someone utters a word and fails to justify it with actions then that isn't a promise, just purely for fleeting enchantment." It was 11:30 in the evening. I took a sip on my coffee while continuously browsing my social media account when the quote appeared. For an uncertain reason, I wasn't able to scroll down and my eyes are fixed on my phone's screen. Those words are like knives being stabbed in my chest - it is probably because it gives me the strong feeling of confusion and a sudden recall of the past once again. The past that can either complete me or break me into pieces more than it should be. I'm Kira Montero, just a typical girl living my own life since I'm an only child and my parents decided to go to Manila for work. I chose to stay here in our province because I feel like I can't adjust easily. I don't even consider leaving my hometown as part of my future plan since I really don't wanna go and there is something that keeps me to stay. No award suits me than being "The most hopeful girl in the whole wide Universe". It can be considered as a positive characteristic but for me those words aren't motivational anymore. I feel like people are taking advantage with the fact that I'm such an understanding person and my hopes are excessive to the point that it is reciprocated with the same amount of disappointments. While reading the words all over again, the presence of a particular person starts to exist in my mind. How is he? Does he know that I'm thinking of him right now in the middle of the night or he is comfortably lying in bed forgetting about my whole existence? Did he really uttered a promise or he just stated a plain phrases to satisfy my needs for assurance? Is everything even real or I only created fake scenarios in my mind to cope up with his disappearance? My past experiences made me feel like my whole life has been circulating with the thought of being hopeful for someone to finally comeback without even knowing if the same person thinks of me the same way that I do. The funny thing here is despite of the actual facts slapping me for me to wake up, I always choose to continue sleeping with the enchanting yet heartbreaking choice of holding on and giving one more chance. My spirit jumped back to reality as my phone starts ringing. "November 4. Note: Kira, It's your 18'th birthday!" The note appeared as it continue beeping. That is when I realize I'm already staring at my phone for about half an hour. I grab my jacket and run through the door leading to the balcony. At a young age, I considered myself busy that I have to set a reminder for me to remember when is my birthday or maybe I was just in denial with the fact that I need to be aware so I can be at the exact time and location where he promised to meet me. Time passed. I was just staring at a distance waiting for someone to come and hoping it is Ethan. Ethan Sanchez, my best friend, my soulmate, my first love. The one who promised me that he'll be there at my exact birthday holding a cake while singing happy birthday. That is why just like what happened in my previous birthdays, I always wake up at exactly 12am, sit on the balcony and wait for him. We grew up together with our dreams imprinted in our hearts. Though we are at a very young age that time, I'm 14 and he's 17, we are both aware that something is on between us. Truely, love is not about age. I can still remember the days we spend together. The jokes he cracks and my genuine laugh not just because of the humor itself but more of because it came from him. I remember the long walks we shared going to school. The way his sweats falls off his cheek because of carrying my heavy bag full of books we used to read together. I remember the smell of banana leaves where we used to eat during lunch breaks. His eyes that seems to become thin lines as he laughs while teasing me because I forgot to took off my shoe rugs before going home. His voice calling me in my nickname exclusively just for him because he is the one who created it. "Uly" is what he used to call me. I don't know why he created such nickname for me because it is far different from my name, all he just say is that he loves calling me Uly because it is his own term for a Filipino word "Ulyanin" that means a person who tend to easily forget everything. I remember way back then, I tend to always misplace things such as my lunch box, my bag and I always forgot where did I put them and eventually realizing Ethan already found them and keeps them. It may sound too weird but hearing him calling me with that gives me butterflies in my stomach. Now, I'm missing everything that had happened. I miss everything about him. His pointed nose and rosy cheeks and everything about us where life seems so perfect. Where trees and plants along side the long rocky roads are the witnesses of love we've created at a very young age. The calm scenery in our province best describes the feeling I had when I'm with him. In peace, with calmness and enable me to breathe freely and show who I'am without fear of judgements. Aside from the happy memories we had, I can clearly remember that day he told me he was leaving. He didn't give me the definite reason but what he assures me is he will be back and he will going to be with me while we achieve our own dreams for ourselves. But god seems to tell me it's not the right time yet. No one singing a happy birthday. No one holding a cake for me. No Ethan. I'm still hoping at that very moment that someone will whisper in my ears even though that was imposible but I hold on to it because that is what I badly needed. I feel like I've been betrayed again. As the cold wind touches my face, I wipe the tears that are about to fall any second I close my eyes while whispering the questions that my heart and mind both agreed to say. "Why are you taking so long?" As if I was talking to him right at that moment. I decided to go back to sleep. I feel like nothing is special as of today because once again, I've been surprised not by just the idea of a wish granted but more of a denied one. I headed directly in my bed, turn off the lampshade beside me and was about to sleep when I heard three knocks at my room's door following a voice that says.. " Happy Birthday! I know you thought I forgot." My heart suddenly beats so fast as if I'm going to have a heart attack. Is it.. Ethan..?