The pain he never knew (Book 1)

18

Chapter 18

"Nakakabagot dito sa bahay. Can you come over?" Nguso ko. Ilang minutong natahimik ang nasa kabilang linya.

[i can't baby. Magiging busy ako ngayong araw]

Sumama ang mukha ko. Bahagya kong nilayo ang phone sa aking tenga at sinamaan ng tingin ang kaniyang caller I.D

"Bakit? Nasaan ka ba ngayon?"

[i'm on my way to see your father. May pag-uusapan lang kami. This will just be quick. Why? What do you want me to do there?]

"Again?"

[yes, again. Just—as soon as our meeting ends, pupuntuhan kita diyan. What do you want to eat?]

"Hmm..ikaw bahala. Anything"

I heard him chuckle.

[ayan ka na naman sa anything mo. Seriously, ano ba talaga ang gusto mong kainin?]

"Hindi ko nga alam! Basta! Kahit ano! Bilisan mo na lang kasi diyan. Nababagot na ko" i was starting to think na nagiging comfortable na talaga ako sa kaniya dahil nasisigawan at nakakapagdemand na ko sa kaniya.

[yes ma'am. Noted]

Bumuntong hininga ako.

"Pano kung—pano kung puntahan na lang kaya kita diyan? Ako na lang magdadala ng lunch"

[zy, remember what we've talked about last time? Na hin—]

"—na hindi ako lalabas mag-isa dahil masyadong delikado. Alam ko" i rolled my eyes. "But love, i have the guards with me. I'm sure wala namang magtatangka dahil nandiyan sila" i compensated.

There was a pleasing pause for a minute pero sa tingin ko ay hindi naman namatay yung tawag dahil naririnig ko pa ang tunog sa kaniyang kotse.

[w-what did you just called me?]

Napangisi ako. Kaya pala siya natigilan. Dahil pala sa tinawag ko sa kaniya.

"Loveee.." ani ko sa malambing na boses. "Payagan mo na ko love please?"

Narinig ko ang pagtikhim niya. I can't help but chuckle.

[it's a no zephyrine. Kahit ano pang itawag mo sa'kin, my answer will remain as no. Do you understand me? I only ask you this one simple favor, so please, sundin mo na lang. This is also for your own safety.]

My hopes dropped. Dahil sa sama ng loob ay agad kong binaba ang tawag na hindi nagpaalam. Again, that was bitchy pero talagang sanay lang ako na lahat ng gusto ko nakukuha ko. Alam kong hindi tama pero hindi ko mapigilan.

I looked at my bathroom door for a minute bago tumayo at tumungo doon. I took a shower and changed ng pang-alis. I know what kage had said, na hindi aalis, pero alam ko sa sarili ko na hindi naman ako mapapahamak. They're all just overreacting. Tutal, may mga bantay naman ako. I have high trust on their abilities.

I put on my shades at naglakad ng taas ang nuo papuntang main door, napatigil lang ako nang may humarang na kamay sa harapan ko. I faced them and it was the guards. I smiled, i knew that they were gonna be here.

"Bawal ka pong lumabas ma'am. Kabilin-bilinan po ni sir na wag kang palabasin."

"Tell me, uhh.. guard no.1? What is in your job description?" I crossed my arm.

"Bumalik ka na lang po sa kwarto niyo ma'am, this way po.." the other gestured his hand papuntang hagdan.

"I know where my room is kuya! I live here for goodness sake so answer my damn question! what.is.in.your.job.description?—What is your primary mission?" I looked at all of them one by one.

They looked at each other for a pleasing moment. Tinanguan siya nung isa na tila nag-uudyok na sagutin na lang ako para matapos na.

"Na bantayan ka at siguraduhing hindi ka mapapahamak."

"Exactly." Tango ko. "Exactly, so written in your job description doesn't entail arguing with me and telling me what to do."

"We're just following orders ma'am. Kami po ang malalagot kay sir kage kapag hinayaan ka namin sa gusto mo"

"Sasamahan niyo naman ako eh so basically, you will all be there in case danger comes in. At yung pa chicks na amo niyo naman ang pupuntahan ko eh so...shall we?"

They just looked at me with a calm and bored look. I even think na hindi sila nakikinig sa speech ko.

"Ayaw niyo talaga?" No response. "Sige, ako na lang. tabi kayo diyan"

I pushed them side ways at naglakad na sa nakahandang kotse.

Hindi pa ako tuluyang nakalapit ay may humawak na sa pulsohan ko para pigilan ako. Inis na kinalas ko iyon.

"Ano ba! Wag niyo akong hawakan!" Tinuro ko yung humawak sa akin. Napaatras siya sa pagduro ko. "The heck!? Makakarating to kay kage!"

Kinakabahan na natigilan sila and i used it as an opportunity to run towards my car. At dahil naka flats ako ngayon ay mabilis na nakarating ako doon at ni lock kaagad ang pintuan.

Before i started the engine, they were all trying to bang the window and open the door. I just smiled and waved at them sweetly bago pinaharurot ang sasakyan.

Five minutes later, i was jollily humming a random song when my phone rang. At first, inignora ko iyon pero hindi iyon tumigil pagkatapos ng isang call kaya sinagot ko iyon. I connected it to the stereo without looking at the caller I.D

"Who's thisss?" I sang.

[Where the hell are you zephyrine linett?! I told you to stay at home but you didn't listen!]

"Hi babyy" i smiled. At talagang pinarating pa talaga sa kaniya ng mga itlog na yun huh? Oh well! I already expected this. "Galit ka?"

[i am zeph. Nasaan ka na? Make a turn and get back to your house.] he said in a demanding tone. Napasimangot ako. That tone won't work on me kage.

"Malapit na ko. Sayang naman yung gas kung babalik pa ko diba? Tutuloy na lang ako. Be there at 4"

Napabuntong hininga na lamang siya.

[bakit ba ang tigas ng ulo mo?] i imagine him leaning on his swivel chair while massaging his forehead.

"I just want to see you. Is that bad?" Pinaliit ko ang boses ko.

Bumigat ang paghinga niya sa kabilang linya. I waited for a couple of minutes bago siya nagsalita ulit.

[Okay fine. But slow down, your guards couldn't keep up. At please lang..wag mong ibaba ang tawag. I want to make sure that your safe.] aniya sa pagod na boses.

"Yes sir, noted" i copied him. "Malapit na po ako. Gusto mong dumaan ako ng drive thru? I'm famished." I wanted make it up to him. I'm sure stress siya ngayon sa mga pinapagawa sa kaniya ngayong araw tapos dumagdag pa ako.

[No. Hindi na. Ako na lang ang magpapa deliver. Just continue driving]

"mkayyy.."

Natahimik ulit ang kabilang linya and so was i. I didn't say anything, i just drove. Ang tanging tunog na maririnig ko kang ay ang car aircon at mga mahinang tunog galing sa labas.

"Love? Nandiyan ka pa? Busy ka ba? May ginagawa ka?" I spoke continuously.

"No baby, I'm just reviewing some papers. Binigay kanina ng dad mo. He said it could help me"

"You're still pursuing that?"

"What do you mean baby?" Malambing niyang sabi.

"Akala ko ba magpapatayo ka ng pharmaceutical company? Bakit tatanggapin mo pa din ang alok ng daddy mo?"

Natahimik siya. I looked at the stereo, trying to check kung on going pa yung tawag.

"Hindi ka ba mahihirapan niyan? Pano kaya kung kausapin mo yung dad mo?"

"Then who's gonna inherit my family's company? Sinong magha handle?" He whispered.

Matamis akong napangiti. What he said made me realize na kahit anong pagkamuhi niya sa dad niya, kahit anong kumbinsi niya sa sarili niya na galit siya, hindi talaga maiaalis sa kaniya ang pag-aalala rito. Na ama niya pa rin ito at responsibilidad niya na pangalagaan ang kumpanyang pinaghirapang itayo ng pamilya niya.

"But what about your dream? Your visions for yourself?"

"The only vision that matters is seeing you walking down the aisle zy...Papunta sa akin."

What he said made my grip on the wheel tighten. A small smile made it's way on my lips as i felt hundred of butterflies fluttering in my stomach.

"That's cute. But quit it, i'm driving and I can't express my kilig properly. Hindi mo alam ang impact ng sinabi mo sa akin" i bit my lip.

"Speaking of which, uh..kelan—kelan kaya ang specific date ng ano. Ng k-kasal natin?" Nahihiya at mahina ko pang tanong.

"I don't know. You decide. Pero kung ako ang tatanungin, I want it to be soon as possible"

I hummed, "Should i shop for my we—s**t!"

I was caught off guard when i felt the tire of my car explode. It made a loud screeching sound making my heart pound really fast and loud. Bumangon ang kaba sa aking dibdib, i panicked. I squealed loudly kasabay ng pagliko ko ng marahas. I didn't get to control the wheel properly at hindi ko alam kung saan ko iyon ililiko, too eager to not let my own car bump on the car in front, i hastily stepped on the break making it stop a few meters away.

"What was that noise zy?! What the f**k happened!?"

Nanlalaki pa din ang mga mata, binasa ko ang tuyo at nanginginig na labi. Marahan at walang lakas na binitawan ko ang manibela at dumapo iyon sa aking binti, even my legs were shaky. I let my head rest on the car seat habang pinapabalik sa dati ang aking paghinga.

Why did my tires explode? Is that even possible?! My driving was steady! Sa tingin ko wala naman akong nadaanan na mga bato! Hindi naman lubak-lubak yung daan! But even so, palaging pinapa check ng daddy ang lahat ng sasakyan namin bago gamitin. It's part of the weekly chores ng mga driver namin!

"s**t! Zephyrine. I'm getting worried! are you still there? say something, baby please."

"I-i'm here. O-okay lang a-ako"

I clasped my hands together at nararamdaman ko ang panlalamig nun.

"Are you okay?! Are you hurt? What the damn f**k happened zy?! Where are your guards?!"

"W-wala. S-sumabog lang yung gulong ng sasakyan ko. I'm okay—I'm okay." I let out a harsh breath at mariing pinikit ang mga mata. It was just a matter of seconds at muli akong napamulat nang may marinig akong kumakatok sa bintana ng aking kotse. I tilted my head to see who it was and it was my guards. They were trying to open my door but it was locked. Urgency was written on their faces.

Kinalas ko ang aking seatbelt. I leaned over to open the locked door when i heard a glass shatter kasabay nun ay pagtama sa akin ng kung ano. It was a matter of time before i felt a shocking pain on the back of my right shoulder.

Clueless, kinapa ko iyon at nakita ko ang aking kamay na puno ng dugo. I knew it was my blood. Another set of fear creeped into me. Marahas na bumukas yung pintuan sa aking side at hinayaan ko na lang ang aking sarili na bumagsak. I knew it was the guards who prevent me from falling down on the cold pavements.

Suddenly, i felt my sight getting blurry, wala na din akong ibang marinig kundi ang pagbusina ng ibang mga sasakyan at nakakayamot na tunog ng ambulansya. Even so, the annoying sound and loud chitchats didn't stop me from hearing kage's voice on my car's stereo. I looked at it as my vision gets blurry. I let out a last silent breath bago tuluyang pinikit ang mga mata.

I opened my eyes and the first thing that i saw was the pure white ceiling. I titled my head and everything was white, except for the furnitures and beige-colored curtains. I knew by then that i was in a hospital based sa amoy ng mga gamot at I don't know..alcohol? But one thing's for sure, the place smells sanitary.

Ako lang mag-isa sa kwartong iyon. I tried getting up. I used my arms to push myself up but i ended up shouting in pain dahil sa may sumigid na sakit sa likod ng aking kaliwang balikat. Mas lalo akong napasigaw nang napahiga ako pabalik sa aking kama. Natamaan ang aking sugat. Sa tingin ko nga ay mas lalo lang dumugo iyon.

"f**k!!" I groaned. May tumulo na luha sa gilid ng aking mata. "s**t!"

Where is everyone?! Bakit ako lang mag-isa dito? As a cue, bumukas ang pintuan ng kwarto kung saan ako naka confine at bumungad sa akin ang mukha ni daddy. Kasama ang mommy at daddy ni kage? Wait! Where is kage?

"Daddy" i breathed out in pain. "It hurts. My back hurts" bulong ko na tila batang nagsusumbong sa daddy niya kung saan masakit.

Nag-aalalang dinaluhan niya ako at tiningnan ang aking likod. Marahang napamura siya at may pinindot na kung ano sa ibabaw nga aking ulohan. He called out a nurse to attend me.

A few minutes, 2 nurses went in. They checked my wound at pinalitan nila ang gauze. Nung nilapag nila yung gauze sa metal na plate thingy, puno iyon ng dugo. Napangiwi ako at parang na imagine ang itsura ng sugat sa aking likod. The nurses went out pagkatapos linisan ang aking sugat.

"A-anong pong nangyare?" I licked my slightly dried lip. Even though i got the slighest idea kung ano nga yung nangyare sa akin, i just wanted to make sure that my assumptions were right.

"You got shot princess" masuyong hinawakan ni dad ang aking ulo.

"By whom?" Those shitty bastards! Hindi ba talaga nila kami titigilan?!

"By your father's enemies. You got shot by a professional sniper two blocks away from you were. " It was tito. "We knew they would attack. But we didn't expect it to be this soon"

"Binabantayan nila ang anak ko. They were monitoring her. Ang hindi ko lang alam kung bakit nila na locate si zeph nang ganon kabilis!" Dad exclaimed.

"I'm sorry hija" nagulat ako sa sinabi ng dad ni kage. Even si tita na tahimik lamang ay napabaling din sa kaniya. I looked at him and indeed, he isn't the type na manghihingi ng paumanhin.

"Why are you saying sorry alfonso?"

"I'll take full responsibility of this eduardo." Baling niya kay dad pero binalik din ulit sa asawa niya, "None of this would've happen hindi dahil diyan sa anak mong kunsintidor bianca! Sinasabi ko na nga ba! Siya at ang mga desisyon niya ang mismong magpapahamak sa mapapangasawa niya!"

Napaawang ang mga labi ni tita. Ganon din ako. Why is he blaming kage? It wasn't his fault! It was mine! Bakit ba ang dali-dali niya lang mag conclude? It's like the only thing that he sees is kage's mistakes!

Tumikhim ako. Pinipigilan ang iritasyong nararamdaman.

"My fiancé" may diin kong sabi. "—has nothing to do with this. It was my fault from the very start. Pinagsabihan niya na ako na wag umalis ng bahay...na siya na lang ang pupunta sa akin but insisted, tumakas ako sa mga bantay ko nang hindi niya alam."

"Pero alam niyang pupunta ka sa kaniya diba? He should've stopped you."

"And I can't be stopped." Tumaas ng bahagya ang aking boses. I'm starting to not like his aura nor his presence. Sabihin na natin na anak niya nga ang mapapangasawa ko at kailangan ko siyang respetuhin pero hindi ko gusto ang pagsasabi niya ng masama tungkol sa sarili niyang anak. He was like discouraging his son in front of his future wife. "He knows about it. He knows how stubborn i am kaya wala na din siyang nagawa."

"But sti—"

"I'm sorry tito but you taking full responsibility of this wouldn't change the fact na nangyari na ang dapat mangyari. I tend to believe that the patient shouldn't be stressed So i suggest that you stop making my fiancé look like s**t in front of me." I speeched in a final tone.

Natahimik kaming lahat pagkatapos nun, the only sound we heard is the ticking of the wall clock and the vibrating of the aircon. Minutes of silence, he cleared his throat.

"Very well then.. babalik na lang kami dito bukas. Magpagaling ka" tango niya at tumalikod na.

I looked at tita bianca with a worried expression. Kinakabahan ako na baka magalit siya sa akin dahil sa mga sinabi ko sa asawa niya. I was worried that she would find me disrespectful. I'm not the kind of a person na may pake sa kung ano ang pananaw ng ibang tao tungkol sa akin pero when it comes to my loves ones and kage's, I intend to get worried...a lot.

She just stared at me at maya-maya pa ay ngumiti tsaka tumango. I chuckled lightly when she mouthed the words 'bravo' At bahagya pang pumalakpak.

Nakalabas na siya and i was left with my dad. Bahagya niyang hinawakan ang kamay ko at tila pagod na umupo sa upuan sa aking gilid at yumuko. I looked at him worriedly bago pinisil ang kaniyang mga kamay.

"Pasensya ka na dad. Pinag-alala na naman kita. Dumagdag pa ako sa mga alalahanin mo" i said and it was also like a whisper.

Talagang nakokonsensya ako. I know he's angry, i know he thinks that I'm stubborn kahit na sinabi ko na sa kaniya na lahat ng gusto niya ay gagawin ko, pero ito, hindi ko pa din tinupad. He knows me too well, he knows how much of a hard-headed i am, iniisip ko nga na alam niya nang mangyayari 'to. He just didn't utter anything, kahit nga pagalitan ako ay hindi niya ginawa. He is always like that, he spoils me a lot katulad ni kage. And maybe that's why nahihirapan at nakakalimutan ko ang mga pangakong binibitawan ko sa kaniya.

"Anak, ngayon ko lang hihilingin sayo ito" it was his turn to grip my hands tightly. "Makinig ka sa daddy please. Para din naman sayo to eh. Ayokong nakikita kang nahihirapan o nasasaktan. I don't want to see you laying unconscious on a hospital bed again."

"I'm sorry dad. I won't do that again. I won't worry you again. This time, tutupad no po talaga ako." yuko ko.

Wala na akong narinig mula sa kaniya pero naramdaman kong tumango siya. Bahagya siyang tumayo at hinalikan ako sa tuktok ng aking ulo. I hugged him on his waist carefully, nararamdaman ko pa din kasi ang sakit ng sugat ko.

"Dad?" I whispered habang nakayakap pa din sa kaniya. He was just hugging me on my head.

"Hmm?"

"Si kage. Nasaan siya?"

"He's outside princess. Do you want me to call him?"

Kumunot ang noo ko. Bakit hindi siya pumasok? I want to see him badly.

"What is he doing outside?" Humarap siya sa akin. "I'll call him. Kanina ka pa niya hinihintay na magising. Both of you should talk" aniya at tumungo na sa pintuan. Ilang segundo ang lumipas at bumukas din sa wakas yung pintuan, revealing my man with his exhausted and stoic face. His hair was disheveled and his neck tie was loose, it was hanging on his collar na nakabukas ang dalawang butones.

Napataas ang dalawang kilay ko nang huminto siya sa paanan ng aking kama. He didn't go near me kaya nagtaka ako.

"Silly!Anong ginagawa mo diyan?" I chuckled like i just found something funny. "Dito ka. Tabi ka sakin" i tapped the space beside me. He didn't move an inch kaya napalitan ang ngiti ko ng simangot. What is his problem? Galit ba to o ano?

"Kageee" i called in a masuyong voice. "Come here please. I missed you. Hold me pleasee?"

He just stared at me, I can't tell if he's angry or not dahil hindi niya naman ako tinitingnan ng matalim, hindi din niya ako pinapagalitan, he was just presenting me a stoic face. Like he's giving me a heads up for a long time silent treatment.

Bahagya kong kinagat ang aking dila, him being silent is starting to get on my nerves, kailangan kong kumalma or else, masisigawan ko siya at mag-aaway talaga kami.

"Baby, what's wrong?" I asked in a low voice. Hindi ako nagpapaawa pero parang ganon na nga..

"Talaga lang zephyrine? Tinatanong mo ko kung anong problema?" Napalunok ako sa seryoso at ma awtoridad niyang boses.

"Zephyrine who?" I acted innocent at luminga-linga. I looked at him and he showed me a 'im-not-kidding-so-you-better-stop-that-or-else' look. "What happened to baby?" I pouted.

"I'm being serious zephyrine" i pouted and glared sideways. Seryoso din naman ako ah? Bakit ba kapag galit ang mga lalaki sa kanilang mga kasintahan hindi nila ito tinatawag sa kanilang endearment?

"I'm being serious too" i whispered to myself.

Mariin siyang napapikit at hinimas himas ang bridge ng kaniyang ilong.

"Ano bang problema mo?"

"Ikaw! Ikaw ang problema ko. Bakit mo ba ako pinag-aalala?! Bakit ba napakatigas ng ulo mo! Hindi ka nakikinig sa akin o sa dadddy mo!" He spat and i looked at him unbelievably, shocked that he just shouted at me.

"Why is it so hard for you to follow a simple f*****g rule? Is it too much to ask zephyrine? Ang wag kang lumabas ng bahay niyo pansamantala? Habang wala ako?"

Napatuptop ako ng labi, i lost the ability to speak dahil iyon ang unang beses na nagalit siya sa akin at sinigawan ako.

"G-galit ka?"

"Nag-aalala ako"

"Galit ka sakin. You can't even look at me straight" i swallowed the lump on my throat. "Kage look at me" i demanded. "Dahil ba matigas ang ulo ko at hindi ako nakikinig sayo, H-hindi mo na ba ako gusto? A-are you gonna cancel the wedding?"

He looked straight at me and his cold and beguiling eyes stared at my teary one. Dahan-dahan siyang naglakad papunta sa akin at hinila ang stool sa aking gilid. He slowly reached for my hand and i can see how my hands disappeared when he cupped it.

"No one's gonna leave no one" he looked at me intently and reassuringly.

"Kawawa naman pala si no one" i faked a sob. Napailing siya.

"You made me worry baby. I hate seeing you in that state. Please don't do that again, I can't lose you" The last statement was almost a whisper.

"I'm sorry. Kung pinag-alala kita—kung pinag-alala ko kayo, I'm sorry. Hindi ko na uulitin."

"You better be, i'll hold unto that." He rose up from his sit and planted a kiss on my cheeks. I smiled, my baby can't afford to stay angry at me.

"Did you found the shooter?"

Nakita ko kung paano nagdilim yung mukha niya. His grip on my hand tighten kaya napatingin ako sa mga mata niya, his eyes shows menace and eagerness. Ako mismo ay napalunok.

"I'm working on it." He then looked at me. "I'll hunt him down zy. Ako mismo ang papatay sa kaniya. He just hurt the woman i first liked dearly, i'll make him pay."

I tried looking for a humor on his face but i found none. He is dangerously serious.

"Don't do that. I don't want blood on your hands. Please don't" it was almost a beg. He looked at me and that's where his face started to soft.

"I don't mind. You know there's nothing I can't do for you"

Tumango lang ako. I don't want to further push through that topic. I don't want to continue with it kasi baka mas lalo lang niyang seseryosohin.

"How is your back?" He asked as he laid his head on my lap, exhaustion was evident on his face. Sinuklay ko naman ang kaniyang buhok.

"It's painful, but thank God it's bearable. Masakit lang kapag nabibigla o humihiga ako. Say, sabi ni dad professional daw yung shooter diba? Bakit sa balikat niya lang ako tinamaan? He should've gone through the head." I laughed but ended up squealing nang pisilin niya ang hita ko.

"It's not funny zy. Wala pa akong nakilala na gustong mamatay, ikaw pa lang. Seriously, stop"

"Okay, pero seryoso, bakit sa balikat lang? I'm starting to doubt his capabilities. Is he really a professional? Pero malay natin diba? Baka Nang makita niya ako sa scope niya, nagandahan siya sakin kaya he spared me my life" i laughed at the thought.

I heard him groan. His breath on my skin sent me shivers. Isn't he aware na malapit lang siya sa vajayjay ko?

"Congratulations zy, you just gave me more reasons to kill him"

"Biro lang" tawa ko. After that, silence prevailed once again.

"Kage?" Tawag ko. At first, i thought he was asleep pero nilingon niya din naman ako kalaunan. He hummed as a reply.

"You want me safe right?"

"Badly"

"I have an idea."

"Hindi ko pa naririnig iyang idea mo pero kinakabahan na ko." biro niya kaya nahampas ko siya sa balikat gamit ang kaliwang kamay.

"Kung ayaw mo, edi sige. It's your loss. Tingin ko talaga magugustuhan mo kung ano man ang sasabihin ko." I tempted.

He looked at me for a while. "Okay fine, what is it?"

"mmkay, since ikakasal din naman tayo, bakit hindi natin subukang manirahan sa iisang bubong?"

I looked at his reaction and he looked at me unbelievably, na tila hindi naniniwala, na ako pa talaga ang nag offer.

"Come again? Gusto kong siguraduhin na hindi ako dinadaya ng pandinig ko." Napatayo na siya.

I smiled and slowly clinged unto his neck. I leaned closer to him hanggang sa ilang metro na lang ang layo ko sa kaniyang tenga.

"Let's live together, shall we?" I whispered, he tilted his head until we became face to face with each other. "Iuwi mo ko sa condo mo."