It's time to move on

While sitting at my favourite diner as I always do during my lunch time I suddenly feel someone staring at me. My heart skips a beat. Did he find me? I gather my wits and then turn  around and meet his eyes, icy pools of blue, he smiles at me. I could melt where I sit. Reluctantly I turn  my attention back to my book and latte. He is very handsome but I can’t be involved with anyone right now. A few minutes later he sits down, “I’m sure this happens to you a lot but I wanted to ask you if you are free for dinner tonight.” He says. Up close he is even more handsome than from afar. He is tall and blonde. Actually this has never happened to me before. “That’s kind of you to ask but no thank you.” I reply. “Why not? Are you married?” He asks, lifting his eyebrow. “No.” I reply, shaking my head. “Dating anyone?” “No.” I reply, smiling a little. “Gay?” “No.” I reply, almost laughing. “Then what possible reason can you have for turning down a free meal?” He smiles. “I guess I don’t have a reason.” I reply. There is something about him. I feel a pull towards him. “Good. Then I’ll see you back here at 6pm.” I just nod and he walks off. What have I just agreed to?   *** Around 5:45pm I’m sitting in my car looking through the diner’s window. I don’t know why I even came in the first place. My whole afternoon was spent thinking about this. I see him waiting. Waiting for me. I can’t manage to get myself out of my car. I do not want history to repeat itself. Still I  can’t manage to get this man I met only a few hours ago out of my head. What is wrong with me? At 6:15pm I see him standing up. He walks out the diner and looks into the parking lot, he spots me because I can’t hide in time. He walks up to my window and says, “So you stood me up?” “I’m sorry but I don’t think I can do this.” I reply honestly. He at least deserves the truth. “How about you get out of the car and we talk face to face.” He says. He doesn’t seem angry. I’m not sure how I feel about that. I’m used to the anger.  I do as he asks and he steps aside. I have to admit to myself that I’m bracing for the worst. “Are you scared?” He asks. I’m a little surprised by his question. “Very.” I reply, leaning on my side door, arms crossed over my chest. “Me too. It’s never easy to meet new people. I mean I have a ten year old that I see every other weekend if I’m lucky. Women don’t want to be with me after they find out.” He says joining me against my car. I start to relax, “I’ve been single for eight years. When I tell men that they think there must be something wrong with me.” Even though there is. He smiles slightly and it temporarily leaves me speechless. That is not the usual reaction I get. “So how about we go inside for only coffee and talk about everything wrong with us.” He suggests. I smile and nod. I want to go with him. The pull is undeniable. “Good, but you are going in first before I turn around and you’re gone.” I lock my door and go inside, the waiter greets us and we take a seat. “How are you doing? Want to run away yet?” He asks with no hint of sarcasm in his voice as far as I can tell. “I’m good.” I reply. He is very different from all the men I’ve dealt with. I feel it. When we’ve placed our orders and the waiter leaves. He leans over a little, “So eight years? That’s a long time.” “It is.” I reply not sure what else I can say. I’m just trying not to stare at him too much. He has the facial features of a god and a strong body. “Want to tell me about it?” He asks, c*****g his head to the left. I shake my head. I barely know this man. I don’t want to tell him just how messed up I really am. “Then I’ll tell you my story. Was married for about seven years, wife cheated on me since we got together then got divorced just over two years ago.” “I also got cheated on.” I admit. “But that can’t be the only reason.” He fishes. I don’t know if I want to tell him. What is the worst thing that can happen? He gets up and walks away? Okay, maybe I should tell him then I can go home and forget this ever happened. “He used to hit me.” I reply. I do not make eye contact. “That bastard! How long?” “You really want to know?” I am truly surprised not many people care about the details. “Yes.” “We were together for two years; it started about a month after we got together.” “Where is he now? I hope he is locked up.” He says angrily. I shake my head. “No. I just moved away.” More like ran away. “He doesn’t know where you are?” “I don’t think so.” I say. I hope not. I don’t know what will happen when he finds me. I can only imagine. “I can’t imagine what you’ve been through. I get why you didn’t want to come in. If you want to leave I will totally understand but I really want to get to know you better.” He says softly. “Even after what I just told you?” I am unable to hide my shock. “Especially after what you’ve just told me. I want to show you that not all men are like that and you do not deserve someone like that.” What a strange day. I am still not sure what to make of this man whose name I still don’t know. “I’m okay.” I reply. I mean it. The waiter comes over telling us that they will be closing soon. “Can’t believe we’ve been here for so long.” He says. We have made small talk most of the time after dropping the biggest bombs. I’m genuinely surprised that he is still here. “Yeah it’s strange. I don’t even know your name.” “Jason.” He says extending his hand. “Rebecca.” I answer, shaking his hand. Sparks shoots through my body as our hands touch. We get up after exchanging numbers and he walks me to my car.