The middle of this chapter contains an assault scene that may not seem pleasant to some of you. Please skip this chapter or read to a certain place and skip. Thank you for your understanding.
“I’m better and different”, he had assured me.
I should have followed my intuition that behind those kind words were nothing more than a charade.
Why didn't I just end the call with “Hello”?
I should have read the signs, I should have listened to my best friend.
I should never have agreed to visit him.
I should have gone straight home after my training, I should have called my driver to pick me up.
How could I have known that “I want to be your safe space and the love of your life” were just obscure lines that meant “I would like to have s.ex with you”?
The first thing he had done was get overly comfortable.
Oh well, it was his apartment, after all, I had thought to myself.
But something was demeaning about a man clad in just his briefs asking if I cared for a massage.
I had instantly become uncomfortable and told him that I did not need a massage, making sure to say it humorously while I moved away from him.
Crazy how he kept insisting on coming closer. I was able to hold him off with excuses until he left for the bedroom.
I sat alone in the living room, fidgeting and thinking about how I would avoid that room while I waited for my driver to pick me up.
At 9:15 pm, I received a text.
[Won’t you come to the room and lie down? It seems the driver won't be here anytime soon].
I wanted to type back No, but I instead replied with a smiley face.
[No, I would rather wait for him in the sitting room].
I prayed that he would fall asleep and prayed that the driver would arrive soon.
“What have I gotten myself into?” I muttered.
He walked back to the sitting room and I noticed how he stared at me before asking me to go to bed.
I pretended to be too lazy to walk down to the room, but he insisted on carrying me to the room. I pretended like I didn't hear what he had suggested, but a few seconds later, he came up to me and picked me up.
I attempted to struggle from his grip, but he hushed me and assured me that I was safe.
Only someone without empathy would not notice how badly I didn’t want to go into that room with him or, better still, lie in his bed with him.
But my hesitation felt like a joke, and he kept saying.
“Devara, you’re so stubborn, I won't hurt you”.
I had to follow him because he was stronger than I was.
I was only a weak eighteen-year-old who hadn't even perfected her shifting.
What’s the worst that could happen?
As I lay on the bed with my legs folded, he wrapped me in his arms and started kissing my neck. A feeling of instant discomfort eluded me.
I set out to shrug him off, but he continued. I didn’t want this, but I couldn’t fight back.
I just lay there while he turned me to face him and started kissing and touching me.
He proceeded to endeavor to remove the shorts I had on, and I told him not to, but he forced them off and threw them away.
I was left with just my panties and t-shirt on. I became numb, this was not what I wanted. I told him I did not want this.
“You are just like the rest” I mumbled.
I did my best to push him off and told him I couldn’t do that.
As I cried out while saying this, he hugged me and whispered.
“It’s going to be fine, just trust me, I'm not like them”, were his words to me.
I was unable to grasp it, he was not like the rest, yet here he was lying on me like a pile of wood.
He then asked me to touch him. The nerve of him, how could he ask that of me? I was unable to touch him, so I sobbed and told him I was unable to do it.
Every other attempt he tried on me, I shrugged it off. He stood up from me, muttered something to himself, and headed back to the sitting room.
As I looked over from the bed, I saw a bow-legged man walking away with a boner and hoped he would never come back to bed.
I thought it was finally over, but it wasn’t.
Why did I stay even though I could run away? Some would ask, but that was because I thought he had listened to my plea and finally come back to his senses. I gave him the benefit of the doubt that he wouldn't go ahead with it, but I was wrong. He was the sweet Jason everyone knew: the one who would run over to me with no hesitation whenever I was in a crisis. Who would have thought he had a beast side in him that he had hidden perfectly well with all those warming smiles he let out whenever he glanced at me?
But he came back with a smile on his face and this time stronger than before.
I thought pretending to be asleep would work, but he started by kissing my neck and the touching became more intense.
He forcefully tore the panties I was putting on and shoved his fingers into me with intense force.
At that moment, I was unemotional.
This was happening and there was nothing I could do.
His fingers were already in my vagina
Every “NO” I yelled seemed to sound like “I want more” in his ears.
I couldn’t scream, my lungs wouldn’t let me.
He then proceeded to put his weight on me and slid his p***s into me.
I let out a sharp cry and told him to stop, that I was in pain, but he didn’t.
I tried to push him off, but he pinned me down. Not only that, but I bit his shoulders, but it seemed to be more of a turn-on for him.
I kept telling him it was painful, but he didn't stop. His pace intensified as he approached his orgasm and he shot his c*m.
“Devara, you are the sweetest one yet”, he
mentioned after he had c*m all over my body.
I stared at him in disbelief. How could he even utter such words to me? After forcing himself on me?
“You are a beast, Jason”, I blurted out, wiping off my tears.
“What? You wanted it as well, Devara. You wouldn't have come to my place by this time if you wanted to avoid having s*x with me”, Jason got off the bed, putting on his pants.
“Did I want it, Jason? You called me and asked if I could stop by your place before going back home, which is why I came here!”, I yelled out, got up from the bed, and began hitting him on his chest, crying my eyes out vehemently.
He grabbed my hands and gave me a stinging slap on my face, and then pushed me onto the bed.
“I am going to tell Mama and Papa”, I swore at him and stood up from the bed.
Jason began laughing at me like I was a joke or whatever I said meant nothing to him. I had just told him that I was going to report to the Alpha and Luna of our pack but here he was, laughing like he was on crack or something.
“And you think they will believe your words over mine? Devara, you have been nothing but a disgrace to your family. At age fifteen, you had already started sleeping with pack members, boys, and girls alike, you didn't care, you gave them your body willingly, forgetting that you are the Alpha's only daughter and the next in line. So, why do you think they will believe anything that comes out of that dirty mouth of yours? Besides, everyone knows that you are a pathetic liar”, Jason scorned and began laughing. This time it was more intense.
He was right, no one would believe me.
Jason was the godson of my parents. He was known to be well-behaved, intelligent, and polite. Everyone loved him, and the kids my age all looked up to him as their role model. While I had a bad reputation in the pack, not just the pack but the whole clan, everyone knew me as the promiscuous Alpha's daughter, Devara, who went around causing havoc in the clan and sleeping around.
But it was all a lie. I went along with all those tales about myself because I wanted to be seen or heard by my parents, who loathed me and believed I had caused the death of my elder brother who died trying to save me from drowning. I had only slept with one man all my life, and that was Asher, my first boyfriend. Jason was the second man who had slept with me, but this time it was without my consent.
I refused to believe that my parents' hate and anger towards me would cloud their judgment and make them not believe that Jason had sexually assaulted me.
I picked up my t-shirt and pants and put them on. I was going to tell them what had just happened and expose who Jason was to them, his real color.
I dashed out of his house, weeping, and raced through the woods in the dim moonlight, distorted shadows looming around every tree trunk as I found my way to the freeway.
I stood by the corner of the road, waving my hand for a ride or anything that would take me out of that place. Luckily enough, I was able to stop a truck that was going in the same direction as our pack villa.
I jumped in and sat in the open trunk of the truck. I wasn't going to let the driver see me shedding tears. He was going to ask me what had happened, and I wouldn't be able to tell him as I was too ashamed of myself.
I sat down in the trunk and wrapped my hands around my leg as I swayed back and forth recalling what had just happened to me. How could I have been so stupid as to find myself in that position? Why didn't I run? Why did I go to the room? Why didn't the driver come? I kept yelling. Why? Why? Why? And blame me for everything.
“Miss, we are here”, the truck driver informed me and parked.
I jumped down from the trunk and thanked him for giving me a ride. He asked if I was okay, and I told him I was fine. He looked at me for a while, like he knew something was wrong with me, before driving off.
I stood in front of our pack villa and stared at it for a moment before I took a step. I folded my hands around me as I walked along, every part of my body was shaking uncontrollably as I took my steps one after the other, my head bent low, I was lost in my thoughts. I arrived at the entrance of my house, the Alpha's mansion, and saw Jason's car parked.
My eyes widened, and my legs stopped moving immediately I saw his car. Why was he here? What was he up to? Was forcing himself on me not enough? Lost in my thoughts, I noticed how strangely the omega maids who worked at the Alpha mansion were staring at me. Their eyes were filled with repugnance as they murmured among themselves.
“Why are they staring at me?”, I muttered and ran into the house, calling out to my parents.
“Mama, Papa”, I called out as I ran into the house.
I halted my steps as I caught a glimpse of my parents, sitting down and fuming in anger. Jason was standing beside them, he got a devilish smirk on his face the moment our eyes met.
“Mama, is everything alright? Papa?”, I called out softly. I was shivering as I didn't know what was going on and what Jason had told them.
“You evil swine!”, my face was met with a hot slap from my mama.
She spat in my face and began spewing profanities at me. Jason pulled her away and calmed her down.
“Why? Why did you slap me?”, I cried out, holding my cheek.
“Jason told us he caught you at a s*x house and when he tried to talk you into coming back home, you set out to seduce him, but he refused, and you threatened him”, Papa bellowed at me, his eyes burning with rage.
“I… I…”, I stumbled upon words. I couldn't speak. What had Jason done? What kind of lies did he tell my parents?
“Papa, I didn't do this, I am innocent of those allegations”, I cried out and went on my knees. I crawled my way up to my Papa and held his hand, begging him to believe me.
“Devara, stop with the pretense. It would do you no good. Just apologize to the Alpha and Luna for your ill behavior and I will let go of what you tried to do to me”, Jason said, keeping up with his act. I looked at him and I could see the sly smile married to his face. He was enjoying it.
“You are lying. You forced yourself on me! You assaulted me!”, I yelled out at the top of my lungs, wailing my eyes out, but the next thing that I knew, my mama gave me another slap and cursed me, calling me all sorts of names.
“Mama, Papa, please, believe me”, I cried out. Mucus came running out of my nose, the veins in my neck popped out as I cried my heart out, begging my parents to believe me.
“Why would I lie? What aim would I achieve by lying?”, I begged my parents with hopes of them seeing the truth in my tears. But I was met with their disgust, disappointment, contempt, and scorn towards me, while Jason's face pursed into a smirk.
I didn't know what to do. They didn't believe me. Mama was wishing I was the one who died, not my brother. Papa was saying he should have gotten rid of me from the day I became a thorn in his flesh. I was confused, so I ran out of the Alpha mansion, tears trailing down my cheeks like a waterfall. I couldn't believe it. My parents didn't believe me, they believed someone else who wasn't their child, even after I cried and pleaded with them to believe the words that were coming out of my mouth.
Why would I lie about him forcing himself on me? Yes, I said I liked him. Yes, I admit that I went to his place with my very own legs.
No one had forced me. I went there myself, but shouldn't I get to decide whether I wanted to sleep with him or not? Yes, I know I am not a virgin, but I still needed to give him my consent. I thought he was different, he knew me better than anyone, he said he was constantly on my side, he promised to protect me and even help me fix my relationship with my parents. But they were nothing but mere lies. He had destroyed it and taken away the leap of faith I had in building the relationship between my parents and me. I continued running with no direction in my head, all I wanted was to get away from this place that was choking the life out of me.
I had been running for a while when I caught a glimpse of the main road.
I ran for it, hoping that when I crossed it, my problems would somehow go away.
I was halfway into the road when I got hit and felt the air rush out of me.
I had been crying so loudly while my eyes had been swollen shut with tears, and I had not noticed the truck until it was too late.
I lay on the side of the road, nothing hurt like the pain from my parent's betrayal, and even as I slid into unconsciousness, their words were all I could think of.